Description comments

[Dimar]

I am _t_.

I just discribed my first dragon earlyer today and ended up spending close to 2 hours reveiwing others. Then i found these threads... Sorry if signing my comments is stepping on this threads toes.

Also thank you to whoever pointed out my grammer error.

Signing your comments is just fine! No one else usually signs with "t" so you're not stealing their letter, and you're not stepping on anyone's toes. Welcome to reviewing (and the threads)!

Edited October 2, 2013 by Dimar

[Lagie]

I am _t_.

I just discribed my first dragon earlyer today and ended up spending close to 2 hours reveiwing others. Then i found these threads... Sorry if signing my comments is stepping on this threads toes.

Also thank you to whoever pointed out my grammer error.

Yay! A new reviewer! *gives brownies* Welcome to the team.

You're definitely not stepping on anyone's toes!

[angelicdragonpuppy]

Weighing several thousand pounds and standing over a dozen feet tall, this dragon is a most massive, impressive creature. In appearance, at least. Behaviorally, Roku firmly believes he's a firefly, and as such spends his time skipping around fields at night "communicating with his kindred spirits." How exactly a giant stone dragon comes to the conclusion that they're a firefly is anyone's guess, but the sight of him standing hopefully in front of confused children, waiting for them to capture him and turn him into a nightlight, is rather disconcerting.

 

Accept: Very good but needs more cheeses of the *goat* gender - TJ09

 

BLESS WHICHEVER OF YOU DID THIS o-oh my goodness laughing so hard right now, yes yes and more yes X'DD

Edited October 2, 2013 by angelicdragonpuppy

[Herk]

 

 

BLESS WHICHEVER OF YOU DID THIS o-oh my goodness laughing so hard right now, yes yes and more yes X'DD

TJ reviews

[Enigmatron]

For Lizalfos again:

 

Accept: *as an ambassador* OR *emessary* *embassy is a building) Very original -H

Whoops! Whoever this was, thank you, though~ I should've known from Subspace Emissary.

 

Edit: And they accepted again, with:

Accept: Yay for corrections -H

 

Again, thanks!

Edited October 2, 2013 by Enigmatron

[dracopenguin]

A Princess Or A Psychopath is a dark and mysterious figure in her Cave. Despite being a White Dragon, she never uses her powers and spends almost all of her time alone. This is mostly because she is insane.

Abandoned by her parents as an egg, Psychopath was different from the moment she hatched. Cold, isolated, and occasionally aggressive, she made no friends. But this didn't matter to her, for she began to create imaginary friends, hatchlings which existed only inside her mind but nonetheless kept her company. Some of these were based on real hatchlings or eggs which she had seen die; when her owner killed an unwanted Sunstone egg, Psychopath created two imaginary Sunstone hatchlings - a boy and a girl - because she didn't know which gender the egg would have been.

Psychopath still believes in these imaginary friends, although her fantasies are now full of darkness and doubt. Occasionally she sings haunting songs about her predicament, although she rarely reveals much about her past.

•Accept: Very nice -H

•Accept:

•Accept: Looks good to me. ~D

 

Thanks guys

 

EDIT:

Oh Wwhatevver is a rather proud Water dragon. It is unfortunate that he is a Water dragon, because he has a slight speech impediment which means that he tends to stutter on 'w's and 'v's - leading him to proclaim himself a proud "wwater dragon", or, worse, "sea-dwweller". When other dragons tease him, he usually just says "Oh, wwhatevver!" before swimming away muttering about "stupid landwwellers". This is, of course, how he earned his name, although he prefers people to call him Eridan. The only time his pride allows him to display any sort of affection is in the case of the Flamingo Wyvern Think Of The Cuttlefish, who he pretends to view merely as a friend but in reality admires from a distance, wishing that she would leave her cuttlefish for long enough to be his mate.

Oddly, Wwhatevver is one of the dragons who believes the stories that CAN'T FIGHT THE HOMESTUCK tells. He is also fixated on magic, which he calls 'wwhite science', and he wishes that his own powers were stronger.

Accept: Poor Erigan -H

Edited October 3, 2013 by dracopenguin

[Herk]

For Lizalfos again:

 

 

Whoops! Whoever this was, thank you, though~ I should've known from Subspace Emissary.

 

Edit: And they accepted again, with:

 

 

Again, thanks!

You're welcome

 

Also I found a new reviewer:

 

Accept: Short, but not bad ~Rwolf

who has seen at least 3 of my latest descriptions

 

Welcome to the fold favourite muppet from my childhood *waves*

 

Edit:

Fairytale of NY

Fairytale is a huge romantic believing in true love and romance. Yet her idea of romance seems to differ greatly from the dreams of young hatchlings and naive humans. Her idea of true love is passionate, has its ups and downs, involves a lot of hard work and arguments and screams of angry profanities. But in the end it's all worth it.

 

got:

Accept: Guessing she's named after the song? ~K

 

Yes, Kimoko she is indeed . Hi Gelert *waves*

Edited October 3, 2013 by herk

[dragongrrl]

I'm still waiting for approval on a couple of very old descriptions, including The Shadow, but I've just added a couple of new ones, and have a few others I need to write.

 

Today, the first is NinePinZ,

 

NinePinZ takes his hereditary responsibility very seriously. He came to the Mint Garden after hearing stories from his egg days, and applied to Mentha for a position among those who watch over the Garden and the School for Hatchlings.  Mentha liked the bold young Guardian, and in asking about his background and interests, found that they both share a love of a good game of ninepins, with NinePinZ being named for his obsessive love of the game. However, when Mentha invited him to play a game, he was amazed by the young Guardian's novel approach. As Mentha released the ball, NinepinZ raced the ball, attempting to position himself in front of the pins to prevent the ball knocking them over. Mentha promptly offered him a position as an instructor and coach for the new game, Guard Pins.

 

User Comments

 

Accept: I can't spot the difference still nice -H

Accept:

Accept: Cute! ~D

 

Herk's comment made me go back and take a look. After I first posted it, I realized prompt should have been promptly, so I made the quick edit and returned it to the queue. That's the difference!

 

Next is Awjusta Dream:

 

Awjusta Dream is a bright and imaginative dragon who just wants to make life better for those around her. She has always delighted in finding ways to bring a rose-colored reality to the dreams she drops on the unsuspecting. She watches for clues to the hopes and wishes of those who live in her proximity, and tries to send them exactly what they want in the most realistic story she can imagine. Of course, she waits for them to wake to real life and hears them cry, "Aw, just a dream!" She assumes it is a form of thanks for the visions she created, and promptly flies off to "help" someone else "get" what they wish for. She does not stay to see their pain as they return to the problem they face. Otherwise, she might understand their disappointment when they know life from the dream is not real, and temper her dreams to give hope, rather than repeatedly dash it.

 

User Comments

 

Accept: Nice -H

Accept: Very nice! ~D

 

I did go back and edit her, since Herk pointed out an extra space in the first post. I think she had one other nice comment from the first posting, something about bittersweet, but it is lost to posterity now!

[Rans]

 

Edit:

Fairytale of NY

 

 

got:

Accept: Guessing she's named after the song? ~K

 

Yes, Kimoko she is indeed (this was Kimoko, right?).

Nope, that was me. I don't review descriptions very often, but I'm guessing I'm going to have to use a different initial...

[Pokegirl858]

I've got lots of descriptions pending now and could never decide which to post here, but I'm pretty sure this one is my favorite by far :

One head loves donkeys. The other's fond of elephants. And that's only the beginning.

Even though he's over 200 years old, there are almost no recorded instances of a time when Ufisir's heads could agree on anything. The right head calls the left head a hare-brained , while the left head calls the right head a close-minded old man. The left head is always complaining about the heat, while the right sees nothing wrong with the weather. The left head believes that all dragons are entitled to a fair chance at owning gold, while the right thinks those who want gold should work for it. At times the right head mumbles insults toward dragons who have dead eggs or same-gendered mates, which promptly earns him a snarl from his counterpart. If the heads can't agree on a particularly important issue, Ufisir's entire body simply shuts down. This can inconvenience many, as he is quite large and heavy. The entire clan is convinced that they will simply never agree on anything.

 

User Comments

Accept: Nice -H

Accept: Hmm. US Government, anyone?

Accept: Ohgosh, I laughed so hard once it got to him shutting down. ~D

 

I'm so glad others got it and no one's offended so far I didn't want to favor one party over the other.

 

Also, as of tonight I'm going to start commenting on all reviews and signing them ~PG. Just a head's up!

[Enigmatron]

So Lizalfos got another accept a while back and I was too lazy to post it, so I'm doing it now:

Accept: Interesting. ~D

 

Who was this? Am I missing something obvious?

 

I haven't gotten any of the dreaded random-rejects I've read about in this thread's archives. Might they have died out, or...?

(And this thread has inspired me to make Flood and Drought a couple in secret, I wasn't sure if it was allowed before. Just they'll probably (assuming I actually get more female dragons than Omega ) be forced to take female mates by an unknowing...someone else. Not sure yet.)

 

And when I do get around to reviewing - will ~Enigma be fine or should I use ~Enigmatron?

Edited October 3, 2013 by Enigmatron

[Herk]

So Lizalfos got another accept a while back and I was too lazy to post it, so I'm doing it now:

 

 

Who was this? Am I missing something obvious?

 

I haven't gotten any of the dreaded random-rejects I've read about in this thread's archives. Might they have died out, or...?

(And this thread has inspired me to make Flood and Drought a couple in secret, I wasn't sure if it was allowed before. Just they'll probably (assuming I actually get more female dragons than Omega ) be forced to take female mates by an unknowing...someone else. Not sure yet.)

 

And when I do get around to reviewing - will ~Enigma be fine or should I use ~Enigmatron?

~D is Dimar my Beloved DC-wife <3 She's in mid-term stress right now, but she usually sees, reads, and comments on EVERY description.

 

And why wouldn't secret pairings be allowed? Because of gender? There are quite a few LGBT dragons out there - The Approved description thread even has its own tag just for that

 

Thanks for the banner btw - as you see I already incorporated it into my siggy.

 

edit: You can sign any way you want - it just helps if your signature is unique, so we don't have three D's or something (I only sign my full name when I ask people to contact me on the forums)

Edited October 4, 2013 by herk

[Enigmatron]

Well, tell her I say thanks if she's too busy to look at the thread~

 

I know now, I got to that point in the thread Just I was paranoid before that I'd get rejected for trying. The irony is that their somewhat-namesakes are mortal enemies.

And you're welcome~

 

I'll probably (when I get there) sign as Enigma, then, unless I run out of room. (In which I'll probably be ET if I can fit it )

[Dirtytabs]

I haven't gotten any of the dreaded random-rejects I've read about in this thread's archives. Might they have died out, or...?

I reckon that a lot of school-age users are busy, including the no-comment reject phantoms. Too busy to click "Reject"? Yeah, that makes little sense.

 

Pococurante is aloof, so much that he doesn't care that his name means exactly what he is and ignores the whispers about him. There do exist things that concern him and individuals he regards highly, but what those are is nobody's business.

 

Accept: OK - H

Accept: Not bad. ~D

Abstain: Description seems too.... Contradictory , it may be just my opinions, but i don't like this.

 

Third commenter, if you happen to visit this thread, if I could italicize text, there'd be an emphasis on "do". (Or "There are things that...") It's a deep down sort of thing.

 

 

Abstain: Ehm, I'm not sure if that name is appropriate with the swearing rules. Maybe say "Butt" instead or something? ~D

 

"Kicking Butt" just sounds so... not tough. Like "badbutt". I believe that mild swears are allowed if there's nothing sexual about them and they're not turned into Mudkips on the forum.

[Enigmatron]

I'm school (well, college) age and I'm not busy at all, though...so perhaps they're avoiding.

And four adults closer to my own reviewing! I'll probably just sign as E because lazy, though.

 

Look out for Indigo and Crimson, alright? I'll work on Lilac and Tyrant as soon as I think of something.

 

Edit: And herk finds them both!

 

Flood of Indigo seems like your typical Waverunner - love of water, innate wave disguise, preying on creatures in the shallow water. But he has two great differences to many of his kind.

First, his otherwise-blue wings have glowing crimson markings, much reducing the power of his disguise.

And secondly, he is in love with the male Sunstone dragon Drought of Crimson.

Indigo's hatchmates, now adult, peer pressured him into taking female mates, which he now does as a habit to shield himself from potential animosity. But he pines after Crimson, hoping that one day he will return his affections...

    Accept: *like a typical* Yay LGBT dragons -H

 

Aaaand

 

Drought of Crimson, as the dominant male of the Sunemoth clan, ought to have a life many dragons may merely dream of - potential mates everywhere, an entire clan under his control, and all the gemstones he can eat. But two things make him different - and hence less trusted - than the other Sunstones...

Firstly, the membranes of his wings glow with a circular, indigo pattern.

And second, he longs for the male Waverunner dragon Flood of Indigo.

As the dominant male, he must live up to expectation and bring children to the clan. But he hopes that one day he and Indigo will finally be together...

    Accept: D'aaw - they share their love <3 -H

 

That second comment So cute!

 

(I cannot spell quote. I keep getting qupte.)

Edited October 4, 2013 by Enigmatron

[tjsweepers]

Hay just a grammar question. Since I made a comment about this and i don't want to incorrectly criticize.

 

 

Do you need a comma if you use the word and?

 

Like

While being the rudest, snappiest, and generally meanest dragon in the girl's cave, Fayt guards her from the monster under the bed and sings lullabies to help her get to sleep.

 

I always thought the last item of a list was just 'something and something else' not 'something, and something else'

 

 

 

[Enigmatron]

I...honestly don't know. But I think both are accepted as long as you're consistent within the piece of writing.

 

The nothing-commentless was too good to last, both Tyrant and Omega have commentless accepts...at least they weren't rejects.

[Dimar]

Hay just a grammar question.  Since I made a comment about this and i don't want to incorrectly criticize.

 

 

Do you need a comma if you use the word and?

 

Like 

While being the rudest, snappiest, and generally meanest dragon in the girl's cave, Fayt guards her from the monster under the bed and sings lullabies to help her get to sleep.

 

I always thought the last item of a list was just  'something and something else' not 'something, and something else'

hehehe

 

In a list like that, the comma that comes before "and" is optional. It's called the Oxford or Serial Comma, and some people prefer to use it while others don't. (I generally am pro-oxford comma, but that's besides the point ).

 

Both of these are correct:

"While being the rudest, snappiest, and generally meanest dragon in the girl's cave, Fayt guards her from the monster under the bed and sings lullabies to help her get to sleep."

 

"While being the rudest, snappiest and generally meanest dragon in the girl's cave, Fayt guards her from the monster under the bed and sings lullabies to help her get to sleep."

 

_________

 

edited to add: still too busy with school to review right now, sorry guys

Edited October 4, 2013 by Dimar

[Enigmatron]

    Abstain: This is pretty good, but you need to get rid of the uncommented "video game" - because RL reference -H

 

Sorry, I fixed it now! Is this better?

 

Lilac Peresfield seems, to the uneducated outsider, a perfectly normal dragon.

This is not the case.

Lilac strongly believes that he is merely the protagonist of some sort of game, often spouting random comments such as 'LIMIT BREAK!', startling all dragons within hearing. He bears a plank of wood for a sword, and will often go on a search for a 'priceless treasure of plot significance', whatever that means. It normally turns out to be something mundane, like a small rock, or tree root.

[Herk]

Perfect fix - I love the 'priceless treasure of plot significance' bit

[Enigmatron]

Ahaha, thanks~

 

I also have from you two of the same comment on different descriptions! I am shocked! How could you!

(And not the yay corrections one either! )

Edited October 4, 2013 by Enigmatron

[Dirtytabs]

Herk has a drop-down list of appropriate comments to make the process faster.

 

 

Footballer plays a game in which the players manoeuvre a pentagonal- and hexagonal-patched ball with their feet. Humans from different cultures all have their own names for a game like this, but the rules that Footballer and his mates invented differ enough (and no one wants to emulate those boorish humans) that they want a new name. He's decided to call it the Get the Ball in the Other Team's Goal by Mostly Kicking It Game, which the others have deemed somewhat lengthy but acceptable.

 

Accept: Gotta love Sir Terry's way to name stuff -H

Accept:

Accept: LOL nice. ~D

Accept:

 

Hee hee.

[Herk]

Ahaha, thanks~

 

I also have from you two of the same comment on different descriptions! I am shocked! How could you!

(And not the yay corrections one either! )

I is ashamed

 

Not really It's basically the only way to work through the queue, to have standard comments like: "Description needs to be 3rd person only -H" "Please use full sentences, grammar and punctuation - H" "OK -H" "Nice -H" "Tihihihi -H" to the occassional "Very well written - H"

 

You read so much that many texts flow together and you spend a lot of time pointing out typos, weird phrases, or rulebreaks that you have to type out as they are all individuals - so you (or I at least) lack the energy to vary "nice descrip" for hundreds of descriptions. God, I'm grateful for firefox's memory.

[Dimar]

Don't be surprised if you see this from me as well: I also have a drop-down list that my browser remembers.

 

(Don't be ashamed Herk; it's economical!)

 

...I mean, if you see this from me WHEN I get back to reviewing in about a week. *goes back to pile of homework.*

Edited October 4, 2013 by Dimar

[Enigmatron]

Ahaha, fair enough.

*grumbles about frozen hatchlings not counting, why can't it be 10 describable dragons*

 

I'm going to run out of dragons to describe at this rate, I only have Slugma, Lizard and Aerith left out of this batch of adults @_@ Moar comments, wherefore art thou...

 

Edit: This is the best comment I have ever seen

Slugmatron is, as described by a multitude of hatchlings, 'a big meany pants'. He doesn't understand why. All he wants to do is pick them up, hug them, maybe eat one or two...

Hatchlings aren't his only victims. Many a visiting dragon has been scared off by his 'friendship' attempts - it's not his fault, he claims, that the dragons have such delicious-looking wings.

He has a particular liking for Coastal Waverunners, believing their wings to be refreshing yet salty. This caused a conflict with Crimson one time, as Slugma crept up on Indigo before being knocked out by one blow of Crimson's tailstone. The incident gave him a long-running fear of Sunstone dragons, but gave both Crimson and Indigo lasting relief from his 'affections'.

    Accept: The first paragraph ahd me snorting -H

 

Edit edit: Why is no one else posting asdf

 

Lizard is an oddity amongst dragons. Being a descendant of a Thuwed, he would be expected to at least acknowledge their existence; instead, he vehemently denies that any of them ever existed - even when talking to one. In fact, his delusions are such that he believes himself to be a caveborn Pillow with an ironic name. Besides this anomaly, however, he is a perfectly normal Terrae.

    Accept: He's obviously a Pillow. (Herk believes in a dragon's right to define himself) -H

 

But the hatchlings will complain because he's not floofy

 

Aerith Shimmerscale, the first general healer of the Enigma Mountains. He carved his own staff out of the wood of a fallen branch, and complemented it with feathers dropped from all sorts of birds - swans, ravens, even a phoenix or two - in an attempt to make it seem like he came from a practised family; in reality, however, this was not the case.

His mother, a Black dragon, was reluctantly mated to a rather violent Hellhorse. One day, a male White dragon arrived at the cave, and he and the Black took to each other instantly. When the Hellhorse was away, they stayed together, and they even had a child - Aerith - who the Black hid away.

One day, however, the Hellhorse attacked the White, killing him before he had a chance to react. The Black was heartbroken, and - after commanding Aerith to flee - fought the Hellhorse to the death.

Aerith doesn't know if his mother survived. But for her memory, he adopted the lost hatchling Enshrouded as his own child, while hiding his past away.

    Accept: Poor dragon (Maybe call her Aerith's mother or by a name than just call her "the Black") -H

 

I couldn't, unfortunately. Lack of room, I had to cut out quite a bit to get the last sentence in.

Unless I give them shortish names...

 

Edit edit edit: I fixed it, I think. Though I kept switching names, so I hope I have them in the right place. (yay for FF-ish despite that I've never played those ones)

 

Edit edit edit edit why does no one else post aaa

    Accept: I think it reads nicer this way -H

 

Long story short, his father is Aeris and his mother is Cloud (I don't ship them, I've never played their game, but Cloud was the first I could think of), and the Hellhorse is Sephiroth. So basically Sephiroth kills Aeris again.

Edited October 5, 2013 by Enigmatron