Posted October 25, 2010 My chicken descriptions seem to be fairly well received, with one exception... Fluff The Magic Chicken Fluff the magic chicken hates the sea and also hates misty autumn days. One day, a creepy human called Jackie Paper kidnapped Fluff, luring her with sealing wax and other fancy stuff to a boat with a billowed sail. For a few pennies, Jackie would exhibit Fluff to wicked Kings and their spoiled offspring as well as to the most rotten pirates one can imagine. . Finally, on a grey night when Jackie Paper was distracted by a girl called Cherry Lane, Fluff the magic chicken saw her chance and casted a fire spell on Jackie Paper. Since then, that little brat has never been seen again, and Fluff happily inhabited her cave to continue her peaceful life, sometimes chirping the tune of the song "Disco Inferno" by the popular Dragon musicians "The Trammps". . And the moral of it is: A chicken lives forever, but not so little boys. * Accept: * Accept: XDDD So awesome! You get a cookie. * Reject: * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: A few minor typos, but awesome nonetheless. x) Lovely moral, by the way. (The Trammps actually are spelled with two "M". Any other typos I have there?) Prince Ludwig the Indestructible In his childhood, Ludwig was bullied and mocked as Shorty-Greasy-Spot-Spot. Naturally, Ludwig developed an urge to take revenge and, while at it, become King instead of the current Queen. Ludwig is a master of disguise. Among others, he fooled Lord Edmund Blackadder as well as Lord Melchett, disguising as Big Sally and Flossie the sheep. . Ludwig's verbal communication however is less perfect - in fact, Ludwig's German poultry accent is subject of the amusement of Lord Blackadder. It was also Blackadder who - with a cunning plan - prevented Ludwig (in the disguise of Nursie) to assassinate the Queen and Lord Percy Percy at a costume party. . Evil Prince Ludwig the Indestructible sent his "apple-ogies" for the "inconwenience" he caused. Nevertheless, he shall "hreturn" and "hreak his rewengie"! * Accept: *bursts out laughing* This is hysterical! A most emphatic approval here. * Accept: So this is why chickes are in the cave. Their atempting to rule the world! - * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: DeputyChick Brenda Leigh Johnson Deputy Chick Brenda Leigh Johnson is a member of the Chick Police Force (CPF). She started her career in Washington District Cave and finally transferred to the CPF as head of the newly formed Major Crimes Division. . Due to her fast career, Chick Johnson initially encountered hostility not only from rival law enforcement organizations, but also within the ranks of the CPF. Yet, against all odds she managed to form her unit into one of the finest amongst the Force. Chick Johnson is known as "The Closer" due to her ability to solve and close a case. Even rivals have to acknowledge her merits. . Chick Johnson is not a person without flaw, though. She would do almost anything to bring an investigation to a satisfying end. While she would describe herself as determined, others probably would refer to her as "incredible stubborn". She is feared equally amongst criminals and officers - may a Guardian Dragon help those who attract her wrath by ruffling her feathers the wrong way... * Accept: * Accept: A bit too short.... * Accept: awesome!! * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: very nice * Abstain: Cute. the words in quotes should be "incredibly stubborn," not "incredible stubborn". Funny thing is, while I have a "too short" comment here, I have several "too long" on other pending descriptions. The Terminator This chick was first seen during a thunderstorm and seemed to appear out of nowhere. It seems to be obsessed by a dragon called Sarah Connor. It calls it a "mission" to find this dragon, but to the average observer the behavior of the chick cannot be labeled anything else but obsessed. The chick asks for the whereabouts of Sarah Connor wherever it goes, but apparently has not been able to find the object of its mission - yet. . Supposedly the chick possesses unnatural strength, endurance and power. Rumor has it that this chick entered a cave - where a fierce gang of Black Dragons consumed fermented fruits - bare-feathered, and left dressed in all leather, leaving behind a crying dragon with a broken limb, but that must surely be drunk-talk. . One thing, though, is a fact - the chick has an imperturbable determination to find Sarah Connor. It looks everywhere, it will not stop, it does not take no for an answer, and if it cannot search a location now, it will be back! * Accept: * Abstain: You spell 'labelled' with double 'l'. (I learned to spell it with just a double L, and the spellchecker I used did as well. Which one is correct?) Merry Chickmas This chick is convinced she is a Holly Dragon and has compiled several facts to support her claim. Like many Holly Dragons, the chick is female. She is festively colored, she is spreading general cheer amongst humans she encounters, and a holly leaf was stuck to the egg the chick hatched from. The chick holds the holly leaf as a keepsake. . The other chicks and dragons keep telling her that she is mistaken - to no avail. The chick is desperately trying to lay a holly egg to prove she is not insane. She sets all her hope on Christmas time to finally find salvation. In their well-meant efforts to prevent the unavoidable disappointment, the other dragons unintentionally worsen the situation by intensifying their attempts to open the chick's eyes. As a result, the chick often feels depressed, and whenever she cannot bear the situation, she hides, holding the holly leaf whiles wishing for her greatest dream to come true - to be recognized as what she is. * Accept: It's absoloutly adorable. Triple accept. Possibly quadruple. It's so so sweet. * Accept: Aww. How cute. Reminds me of a christmas movie I watched * Accept: Love the chickens! So, thanks for the nice comments. Share this post Link to post
Posted October 25, 2010 (edited) Any other typos I have there?) Only one that I saw. The past tense of "cast" is just plain "cast," not "casted." Other than that it looks fine! * Abstain: You spell 'labelled' with double 'l'. (I learned to spell it with just a double L, and the spellchecker I used did as well. Which one is correct?) Is that a British spelling? American English spells it with just one "l" but I'm not sure what other spellings do with it. Hope that helps! Edit because my computer hates me. Edited October 25, 2010 by Danne Share this post Link to post
Posted October 27, 2010 My chicken descriptions seem to be fairly well received, with one exception... Fluff The Magic Chicken * Accept: * Accept: XDDD So awesome! You get a cookie. * Reject: * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: A few minor typos, but awesome nonetheless. x) Lovely moral, by the way. (The Trammps actually are spelled with two "M". Any other typos I have there?) Prince Ludwig the Indestructible * Accept: *bursts out laughing* This is hysterical! A most emphatic approval here. * Accept: So this is why chickes are in the cave. Their atempting to rule the world! - * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: DeputyChick Brenda Leigh Johnson * Accept: * Accept: A bit too short.... * Accept: awesome!! * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: very nice * Abstain: Cute. the words in quotes should be "incredibly stubborn," not "incredible stubborn". Funny thing is, while I have a "too short" comment here, I have several "too long" on other pending descriptions. The Terminator * Accept: * Abstain: You spell 'labelled' with double 'l'. (I learned to spell it with just a double L, and the spellchecker I used did as well. Which one is correct?) Merry Chickmas * Accept: It's absoloutly adorable. Triple accept. Possibly quadruple. It's so so sweet. * Accept: Aww. How cute. Reminds me of a christmas movie I watched * Accept: Love the chickens! So, thanks for the nice comments. Those. Are. Beautiful. -wipes away a tear- Share this post Link to post
Posted October 27, 2010 Only one that I saw. The past tense of "cast" is just plain "cast," not "casted." Other than that it looks fine! Is that a British spelling? American English spells it with just one "l" but I'm not sure what other spellings do with it. Hope that helps! Edit because my computer hates me. Arr, foreign language is foreign difficult. As for labelled, I don't know if it is British spelling (english is not my first language). The english I learned was more British influenced then it was american, as I learned to spell "colour", not color, and such things. Due to several years on the internet, American spelling occurs more often, and sometimes I'm not sure which one I am using. Thanks anyway, I'll remember cast. Too bad resubmitting loses all the previous comments. Those. Are. Beautiful. -wipes away a tear- Why, thank you. I remember running across some of your descriptions while rating, and they were top notch and and quite fun to read. Share this post Link to post
Posted October 27, 2010 I got this comment for my Ember, Lord Dark Ember: User Comments Accept: Wonderful!!! One of the best I've read! That just made me smile at my computer like a dork. I also got this for my Paper, Merci Reginea: User Comments Accept: Very well put And for my old pink Rozalina, I got this: User Comments Accept: Accept: Cool. I think you did a good job. By: user I think I had a good day for descriptions today. Share this post Link to post
Posted October 28, 2010 (edited) New description, for Faded Ember of Hallow's Eve (male adult Ember) How this dragon hatched is a wonder. His egg was found in an overflowing river after a terrible storm, bumping against a log in the swollen current, thought to be dead and frozen solid when brought to the cave. But Fade seemed to hatch just fine, in the end. A little small, but glowing brightly and with no other discernible problems. Yet as Fade grew, he seemed to... well, fade. His bright orange markings grew pale, nearly white, giving him a smokey look once his dark patches grew in. He also remained skinny, actually having very little trouble flying because of how light he was. Shortly after reaching maturity, Fade slipped away one cold autumn night, as most grown dragons do. He has never sought out warm lands like his kin, his favoured home being in beds of dry leaves by icy rivers, where he can listen, alone, to the secrets of the world. Accept: Best description in my hour of editing. Glad you enjoyed it! Edited October 28, 2010 by Dr. Paine Share this post Link to post
Posted October 28, 2010 New description, for Faded Ember of Hallow's Eve (male adult Ember) Accept: Best description in my hour of editing. Glad you enjoyed it! I did my first review on this one, maybe an hour ago? While I also accepted it, I'm happy to see the dashes disappeared as I suggested, and the comment was so good from the other reviewer. I had no idea who the dragon belonged to. Very cool! Share this post Link to post
Posted October 28, 2010 (edited) I got this sometime tonight on my winter dragon Hitsugaya, which makes writing descriptions all the more fun: •Accept: This is probably one of the best descriptions I've seen so far. Excellent sentence structure and very creative! And the description itself: Hitsugaya is cold. No, really. Not only does he have a chilly appearance, Hitsugaya hates letting other dragons get close. Part of it is self-preservation - the fire from other dragons in Nadat's cave could harm him. But part of it is that he feels he's a genius, and thus smarter than everyone around him. And if he's smarter, then he sees no point in conversing with, in his opinion, lower beings. Edited October 28, 2010 by Nadat Share this post Link to post
Posted October 28, 2010 Two linked dragons, the comments imply someone's been paying a lot of attention: Haiak Haiak's egg was somehow separated from it's clutch, and allowed to cool dangerously for days before it was found and re-incubated. Possibly due to this early difficulty, she is clumsy in flight, at least compared to other Skywing dragons. She spends more time than on the ground (or in the water) than is typical for her breed, and over time learned to glide through the water with grace and ease. This is how she came to meet Sizhu, her truest friend and confident. User Comments * Accept: * Accept: Sizu Sizhu lives in a nearly bottomless lake amidst the caldera of an extinct volcano. He is kind, but perhaps a little vain. His high opinion of himself may be a bit off putting to some other dragons, and for the longest time he was just a little bit lonely. This made him a little bit more needy, and he tried to seem even more handsome than before. So all the other dragons thought he was arrogant and conceited, and he became even lonelier. Then Haiak Valvojana, a Skywing whose egg was damaged, so that she can't fly with much grace, crashed into his lake. He swam over to her, planning to drag her to safety, but she swam as though she was born to the water. The two of them soon became fast friends, and Sizhu hasn't been lonely for a long time. User Comments * Accept: * Accept: Aww, that was really sweet. Made me smile. <3 But it looks like Haiak Valvojana has an egg with another dragon, oh no! (Also it's low on time, needs some ERs stat!) * Accept: * Accept: Share this post Link to post
Posted October 29, 2010 Deejay has a tendency of bobbing his head up and down in a beat to inaudible music. This turns into an elaborate dance whenever he does get in range of some music performance. He also has an incredible sense of direction, able to tell which way he's gone and any cardinal direction with ease, even in the dark, blindfolded, in the air or out at sea. This may explain how he's able to perform some of his complex dance stunts, as they often require a keen sense of where his props are at any given moment. He is extremely useful on long voyages, flights, or other sorts of exploration. * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: * Accept: A dancing dragon? Coolest thing in my opinion! good description! I love it when people say why they accept, it makes it feel like it's so much more than "Eh, this is okay. *click*" Share this post Link to post
Posted November 2, 2010 (edited) One of my vampires, Don't Stake Me Bro: An "unofficial" member of the Vassalord clan of vampires, but still standing apart, Don't Stake Me Bro is a rebel -- at least, he thinks so. Really, he's just a goofy young dragon who's still getting used to adulthood. He likes to get involved and help those around him, but his boisterous personality and tendency to leap before he looks usually have him causing more trouble than he solves. He's very honest and opinionated, but always tries to stand up for himself and others when he feels someone is being deceptive, and he always means well. . This dragon earned his name after he confronted a group of older dragons. They retaliated by attacking him. Realizing he had bitten off more than he could chew, he cried, "Don't stake me, bro!" He got away with just a few scratches, and the story spread like wildfire. Most dragons laughed at his cry; Don't Stake Me Bro took it as his name, wearing it as a badge of honor and a sign that he'll confront anyone he thinks is in the wrong. * Accept: * Accept: That was quite funny. Probably one of the best descriptions I've read so far. Ah, I'm really glad they liked it! X3 I need to work on not making descriptions so long, though... Edited November 2, 2010 by god_matter Share this post Link to post
Posted November 2, 2010 Franzose the Frog was named because she would much rather be a frog than a bright breasted wyvern. She loves the water, and is seldom found far from it. She acts very similar to a frog, always happily bouncing around near the water's edge, and gleefully splashing the other hatchlings. Once, when Franzose was a much smaller hatchling, she managed to get herself stuck in water-reeds, but thankfully she was small enough to wriggle her way out. Since then, Franzose knew that she never wanted to grow up so she could stay small and play in the water forever, without fear of being too big and getting stuck. Accept: Bit of a rebel, she is. :-P Yay. That made me smile. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 4, 2010 BananaPeeler used to be a vampire. It was converted and stayed dead, but retained most of its draconity. It feeds off the dead eggs and hatchling corpses, avoiding the other dragons to prevent himself from killing them in his frenzied hunger. Unusually lucid for a zombie, BananaPeeler is used for the others to peel their banana skins before giving the peels to him for eating. Hence, he has also gained the strange nickname of 'Mr Dustbin' inside DracCave. Comments: Accept: Accept: It's DragCave, not DracCave, dracoon! But otherwise, I like it. @ certain nice person who did the second comment: DracCave is an abbrevation of Dracoon's Cave. I should've said this before.... Share this post Link to post
Posted November 4, 2010 Prince Ludwig the Indestructible In his childhood, Ludwig was bullied and mocked as Shorty-Greasy-Spot-Spot. Naturally, Ludwig developed an urge to take revenge and, while at it, become King instead of the current Queen. Ludwig is a master of disguise. Among others, he fooled Lord Edmund Blackadder as well as Lord Melchett, disguising as Big Sally and Flossie the sheep. . Ludwig's verbal communication however is less perfect - in fact, Ludwig's German poultry accent is subject of the amusement of Lord Blackadder. It was also Blackadder who - with a cunning plan - prevented Ludwig (in the disguise of Nursie) to assassinate the Queen and Lord Percy Percy at a costume party. . Evil Prince Ludwig the Indestructible sent his "apple-ogies" for the "inconwenience" he caused. Nevertheless, he shall "hreturn" and "hreak his rewengie"! This is one of the best I've read in this thread- I love Blackadder! Share this post Link to post
Posted November 5, 2010 Here's for my paper... Believing words were sharper then any two edged sword, Rapier Wit spent hours pouring over dictionaries gathering words into a collection that could make a learned man seem foolish. This collection of words was used to fire taunts at bullies, talk thieves into giving up their plunder, or otherwise prove that knowledge truly is the key to success in any language. Accept: great! wow the first sentence dragged me in! Thanks!!! And my Pumpkin, Being small and shy, Gobbledegooka choose to play his little game from inside a pumpkin, using its seeds as ammo he would shoot them out of his mouth at random passersby, until he became quite good and could knock off hats at a hundred paces. On Halloween once a year he and his friends would hold contests in which the winner got to take his girl on a dream date, at the others expense, so they all spent large amounts of time practicing their shooting skills. Accept: I must say it is nice when people offer comments and advise when discribing dragons. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 5, 2010 I have just found the 'review user descriptions'- be afraid, be very afraid. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 6, 2010 One my first description Symbolophorus symphonic (Symbolophorus draconic ssp. symphonic) is named so because he may be a subspecies of Symbolophorus draconic (Deep Sea dragons). S. draconic is a species of lanterfish that diverged from the genus millions of years ago. Some believe that S. symphonic is the beginning of a new subspecies because his vocal chords have developed in such a way as to allow him to sing. His song is much like whale song, although it ranges higher and deeper due to the flexible nature of his throat - he can constrict or expand it significantly to alter his tune. One theory is that this was because of his parentage - an Electric dragon mother and a Deep Sea dragon father. As it is generally expected that electricity electrocutes aquatic animals, that he developed inside an electrical environment and survived may have caused him to mature unusually. S. symphonic hopes one day to find another deep sea dragon with this ability, or at least one who appreciates it. Accept: Goodknight, I can't even pronounce that name in my head! Symbol...oh-phone...us.... symphony... sysphalis... X-D wow. Is that a good thing? Share this post Link to post
Posted November 6, 2010 One my first description Symbolophorus symphonic (Symbolophorus draconic ssp. symphonic) is named so because he may be a subspecies of Symbolophorus draconic (Deep Sea dragons). S. draconic is a species of lanterfish that diverged from the genus millions of years ago. Some believe that S. symphonic is the beginning of a new subspecies because his vocal chords have developed in such a way as to allow him to sing. His song is much like whale song, although it ranges higher and deeper due to the flexible nature of his throat - he can constrict or expand it significantly to alter his tune. One theory is that this was because of his parentage - an Electric dragon mother and a Deep Sea dragon father. As it is generally expected that electricity electrocutes aquatic animals, that he developed inside an electrical environment and survived may have caused him to mature unusually. S. symphonic hopes one day to find another deep sea dragon with this ability, or at least one who appreciates it. Accept: Goodknight, I can't even pronounce that name in my head! Symbol...oh-phone...us.... symphony... sysphalis... X-D wow. Is that a good thing? It was intended to be so. I didn't know what else to make of it at the time. I made the most out of trying to read through a difficult name, and iirc, it was late at night, so humor was multiplied. On to write more descriptions for my dragons! *whooosh* Share this post Link to post
Posted November 7, 2010 It was intended to be so. I didn't know what else to make of it at the time. I made the most out of trying to read through a difficult name, and iirc, it was late at night, so humor was multiplied. On to write more descriptions for my dragons! *whooosh* Oh, ok. Thank you. Yeah, I suppose it is a hard name to pronounce, but that's what I get for writing a decription after finishing a science essay. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 7, 2010 Apart from asking them to find a mentor on the forum, what do you say to someone who is trying to use the dragon descriptions to find help with their eggs? I have seen several now, maybe from the same person. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 7, 2010 I generally say something like, "This is not a description. Tell me what the DRAGON is like!" Though I've never actually encountered that particular thing; usually I say that for descriptions such as "This was my first dragon!" Share this post Link to post
Posted November 7, 2010 I generally say something like, "This is not a description. Tell me what the DRAGON is like!" Though I've never actually encountered that particular thing; usually I say that for descriptions such as "This was my first dragon!" I've seen a few of those! But seriously, I understand now why description approvals are so backed up. While some are good, many are unclear on the concept and demonstrate a wide variety of problems. I appreciate Sock all the more after pounding my head against this wall. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 9, 2010 Heh, heh. /blushes You guys are too kind. x3 I think one of the funniest comments was from someone spamming through comments who left "mmm, nachos" on at least a dozen people's descriptions before I found the comments to report them, lol. Share this post Link to post
Posted November 9, 2010 For Fading Ember: * Accept: * Accept: This is probably the best description I've reviewed all day. A breath of fresh air! Are you J. K. Rowling or something? ... hilariously enough, when you put his description into the IWL site... it DOES net Rowling But I'm not. -wonders if she should go back to character descriptions... -prods Thane- Share this post Link to post
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