Emotional Support

[NoraNora]

Yeah, the art comment was directed to you. My dad used to throw away my art all the time and said it was a waste of effort (so much that I've done it in secret for about 6 years), and it was reassuring to know that there existed people who didn't think my drawings were absolute poop. So I want to see yours! (I'll type up a proper reply when I get home after school. But, have you talked to your brother about your friend? Mentioning that you want to hang out with her or something, and see if he can set something up?)

Oh, I have my DA linked in signature now if you want to see some eyesore artwork. My brothers in college so I can't ask much sadly..

I also have yet to upload more but...meh..

Edited September 30, 2015 by NoraNora

[Kiti]

The social worker I met with told me to apply for university disability services first, then go apply to the state disability and work from there. All my services have been from the same hospital so there's a detailed medical record all neatly set up for a paper trail.

 

in other news wrist wraps are offically the best thing ever. I just need to figure out how not to make mine so tight that they cut off circilation, but not too loose that tehy don't do anything.

 

Getting ready to head over to the univeristy disability office now.

[TehUltimateMage]

I just got an email notifying me that I missed the first round of job postings. Oops… I feel like every minute I lose, the harder it will be for me to find a co-op job, and yet, I'm still so far behind on my portfolio and resume… Only now, the reality of the situation has really hit me.

[Thuban]

The social worker I met with told me to apply for university disability services first, then go apply to the state disability and work from there. All my services have been from the same hospital so there's a detailed medical record all neatly set up for a paper trail.

 

in other news wrist wraps are offically the best thing ever. I just need to figure out how not to make mine so tight that they cut off circilation, but not too loose that tehy don't do anything.

 

Getting ready to head over to the univeristy disability office now.

In regards to the circulation issue, I have these plastic slippery pencils that I use as an "anchor" of sorts when I use wraps. If you are coordinated, or have a helper, put the pencils against your skin, then wrap your wrist the way you would normally. When you remove the pencils, it should leave a little space, that will help stop constriction. The way you are wrapping might be part of the issue too. Some ways of wrapping, will get tighter as the day goes on. Try looking up other techniques that are more specific to your reason for needing to wrap.

 

(while wraps should be snug, if you cant still get a finger under it, its too tight. That is why i suggest using a few pencils, or something thin and smooth while wrapping. Wearing them too tight can cause a lot more damage, even if you arent necessarily losing feeling in your hands. Have your doc show you the proper method for your particular injury/reason for wrapping)

[Kiti]

In regards to the circulation issue, I have these plastic slippery pencils that I use as an "anchor" of sorts when I use wraps. If you are coordinated, or have a helper, put the pencils against your skin, then wrap your wrist the way you would normally. When you remove the pencils, it should leave a little space, that will help stop constriction. The way you are wrapping might be part of the issue too. Some ways of wrapping, will get tighter as the day goes on. Try looking up other techniques that are more specific to your reason for needing to wrap.

 

(while wraps should be snug, if you cant still get a finger under it, its too tight. That is why i suggest using a few pencils, or something thin and smooth while wrapping. Wearing them too tight can cause a lot more damage, even if you arent necessarily losing feeling in your hands. Have your doc show you the proper method for your particular injury/reason for wrapping)

I can get fingers under mine so I don't think they're too tight (this time)

 

I wear mine because of Joint Hypermobility, my hands hyperextend all the time and I'm well beyond the normal range of motion so I wrap mine because I couldn't take them sublaxtating and being so painful anymore.

 

gonna switch to wrist braces if I can find some at MC sports since dicks only had one style that didn't fit.

 

I don't have insurence so going to a specalist is out of the question.

 

hoping that applying for disability will give me Medicade =good

[Ribombee]

I'm not even necessarily looking for condolences here. I just need to have a place outside of where my family can see to post this. I just can't deal with anyone else's tears right now, because I have more than enough of my own to deal with.

 

I just lost my grandmother today. We were very close, and I spent a good portion of my childhood with her. After school, my sister and I would get picked up by my grandfather and taken to my grandparents house until around 7 pm when my parents were home. During the summers, we would spend the entire day with them. Some of my best memories are from those times. My grandmother always had home cooked dinners for us. She taught me how to sew, to cook, to bake, and to do crafts. She was the most loving, wonderful woman I have ever met. She encompassed everything that a good person should be. She was empathetic, caring, and would love you no matter how much of a mess your life was. She never judged, only loved and set an example by her own life. Even after her hands were riddled with arthritis, she would sew quilts to donate to babies and children in need. If you needed someone to just give you a hug, she was the one.

 

She was my last grandparent. I lost my paternal grandmother when I was very young, my paternal grandfather when I was nineteen. My maternal grandfather died a few years ago. I keep going back and forth between tears and feeling empty. The world lost a wonderful lady last night. Grandma, you set an amazing example to live by, and I hope I can live up to it. May you rest in peace knowing you gave your children and your grandchildren so much love and joy, no matter how much the rest of our lives have hurt. You were a bright star in our lives.

[Paintra]

I'm not even necessarily looking for condolences here. I just need to have a place outside of where my family can see to post this. I just can't deal with anyone else's tears right now, because I have more than enough of my own to deal with.

 

....

I'm so sorry for your loss. She sounds like such a wonderful woman, and I hope you're given time to recover from this. If you ever feel the need to talk about it (or anything at all), the people on this thread will welcome you with open arms!

 

___

As for me, I almost lost one of my dogs to coyotes a couple weeks ago. He's been slowly recovering, but lately he's started coughing... He's going to the vet tomorrow, but I'm still pretty concerned for him. He's really, really old for a dog, and I grew up with him. I love him so much, and I hope he'll be okay... I couldn't deal with losing him very well.

[Jet Raptor]

As for me, I almost lost one of my dogs to coyotes a couple weeks ago. He's been slowly recovering, but lately he's started coughing... He's going to the vet tomorrow, but I'm still pretty concerned for him. He's really, really old for a dog, and I grew up with him. I love him so much, and I hope he'll be okay... I couldn't deal with losing him very well.

I lost one of my dogs over a year ago to cancer. It took me a good while to feel better about losing her, but I "got over it" for lack of a better phrase. I'm not very good with words. :c

It's definitely hard at first but, if worse comes to worst, just remember the great life you were able to provide for your dog. He deserved every ounce of love he was given.

*hugs for you and your dog* <3

 

~

 

Ok, so...I'm terrible at speaking with people. I have little training in the arts of socializing. Recently, for whatever reason (genuinely couldn't tell you what put the thought into my head to begin with), I've been wanting to speak with a psychotherapist about something. I emailed three different people/places asking very general questions just to get kind of a feel for what I could expect if I go through with it. One of them emailed back less than 10 minutes after I sent it. Wasn't expecting that. .___.

I'm terrified. I've never done anything like this before. I feel like I'll just get there and either crumble into a heap and cry, or sit in still silence the entire time. Either way, no progress is being made. That's not the main reason I'm so hesitant about making an appointment, but it's still a reason.

I've been stuck like this for maybe a bit less than a month now; I'll go, no I won't, yes I will, heck no, do it, nah, ya freakin' wuss, nope.avi. This email is the furthest I've come so far, aaaand I'm stuck again. I've been half-way talked out of going again since two or three days ago, after being at least 65% sure I wanted to do this.

I need heeeeeelllllp. Suck it up and ask for an appointment? Don't do it?

Without context, the answer seems obvious: do it. I really don't want to explain my reasons for considering not going. Or the reasons for going. Dammit, it's really hard to explain something without explaining it. I'm just stuck, and I don't know if anyone can actually help me make a decision without me explaining everything. Q-Q

[Paintra]

I need heeeeeelllllp. Suck it up and ask for an appointment? Don't do it?

Without context, the answer seems obvious: do it. I really don't want to explain my reasons for considering not going. Or the reasons for going. Dammit, it's really hard to explain something without explaining it. I'm just stuck, and I don't know if anyone can actually help me make a decision without me explaining everything.  Q-Q

Now, I don't understand the entire situation, of course, but if it's you feeling uncomfortable with the therapists themselves, don't go. A therapist you don't feel comfortable talking to is not a good one, period. Now, since there are other causes involved, and I don't know the exact reasons, I can't offer too much help making a decision, though I do think it's a good idea if you believe you need to see a therapist to go to one. Your mental health is extremely important. <3

 

*offers hugs and friendly kittens to be held and pet*

[Jet Raptor]

Now, I don't understand the entire situation, of course, but if it's you feeling uncomfortable with the therapists themselves, don't go. A therapist you don't feel comfortable talking to is not a good one, period. Now, since there are other causes involved, and I don't know the exact reasons, I can't offer too much help making a decision, though I do think it's a good idea if you believe you need to see a therapist to go to one. Your mental health is extremely important. <3

 

*offers hugs and friendly kittens to be held and pet*

It's not any person in particular, as I've never met them in person, it's just talking to people irl that freaks me out. I don't even know if I need to see a therapist. And then there's the unexplained reasons that I don't want to say here. The inability to make simple decisions like this is just....asdfdashfsdalneasd-- *snatches kitten and hides under bed*

[Omega Entity]

Ok, so...I'm terrible at speaking with people. I have little training in the arts of socializing. Recently, for whatever reason (genuinely couldn't tell you what put the thought into my head to begin with), I've been wanting to speak with a psychotherapist about something. I emailed three different people/places asking very general questions just to get kind of a feel for what I could expect if I go through with it. One of them emailed back less than 10 minutes after I sent it. Wasn't expecting that.  .___.

I'm terrified. I've never done anything like this before. I feel like I'll just get there and either crumble into a heap and cry, or sit in still silence the entire time. Either way, no progress is being made. That's not the main reason I'm so hesitant about making an appointment, but it's still a reason.

I've been stuck like this for maybe a bit less than a month now; I'll go, no I won't, yes I will, heck no, do it, nah, ya freakin' wuss, nope.avi. This email is the furthest I've come so far, aaaand I'm stuck again. I've been half-way talked out of going again since two or three days ago, after being at least 65% sure I wanted to do this.

I need heeeeeelllllp. Suck it up and ask for an appointment? Don't do it?

Without context, the answer seems obvious: do it. I really don't want to explain my reasons for considering not going. Or the reasons for going. Dammit, it's really hard to explain something without explaining it. I'm just stuck, and I don't know if anyone can actually help me make a decision without me explaining everything.  Q-Q

As Ali said, if you're not comfortable with the therapist, don't continue going. But you should actually go see them a few times to figure out if you do or not.

 

That said - sometimes it does take a few times before you find the therapist that's right for you. And it's not uncommon to love them when you start, but go through periods of not liking them - usually as a result of them asking you to try things you aren't comfortable with, or their pointing out some unappealing truths. This doesn't make them a bad therapist, or make them a bad fit. You're there to work out your issues, and they're there to help you do so. While they'll validate the positive things you're doing, they aren't there to simply be your personal cheering squad. They're going to say things you don't want to hear, but it'll be for your own well-being. It's up to you in how you take that information and use it - be it to feel sorry for yourself, or to give why they tell you a chance and see how it works out. Pushing your boundaries is the only way that you're going to change things, as obviously the status quo of life hasn't worked out.

 

Also, don't worry about breaking down in front of them. They're there to listen to you. They've seen it all before. And breaking down is a natural step of being able to build yourself back up again. They're going to challenge your feelings on why things are the way they are, and offer some methods of coping and tools to deal with situations as they come up. While they'll be empathetic, they still may tell you some things you might not like to hear, but they are there to help you, not nod yes to everything you say. It's all part of the process.

 

I started therapy about two months ago, and overall it's been a great experience. I lucked out in finding a therapist that I like right off the bat. My sister recommended her to me, and it's funny because my sister warned me that I'll love the therapist at first, then hate her for a bit, then love her again, as that was my sister's experience. However, my mileage has varied - I have't hated her at all, at least not yet, haha. But she's seeing her for a who other can of worms than I am. Everyone's experiences will be different, even among those who see the same therapist.

 

TL;DR -

 

Absolutely schedule some appointments! It may take a few tries to find the right fit, but it's important to give them enough time to come to an informed conclusion. Like finding the right medication for depression or anxiety, it's a process of trial and error, so don't feel discouraged if it takes you a few times to find the right therapist for you.

 

-----

Fun little aside - My therapist has a Dammit Doll. It's absolutely brilliant, and I think I'm going to get one for both myself and my sister. It's hard to keep a good mad going when you're whacking the doll on something and yelling 'Dammit!'. I end up giggling after.

Edited October 1, 2015 by Omega Entity

[Jet Raptor]

^ I often wish I were allowed to take a hammer to a wall in this house...can't do that for obvious reasons...I think I need one of those Dammit Dolls. :I

 

The therapist asked me to call her two days ago. Here I am still debating whether or not I should schedule an appointment. I feel bad for not responding (I will regardless of my decision), but at this point in time I think it might be best to keep things to myself. At least for now. I've been talked out of going again. That being said, I'll probably half-way change my mind again within a week. -.-

 

And I feel like I've hijacked this thread so I'm relinquishing it to the rest of the DC population, sorry for taking over. Q-Q

[georgexu94]

And I feel like I've hijacked this thread so I'm relinquishing it to the rest of the DC population, sorry for taking over. Q-Q

Nonsense! Feel free to come and stop by whenever you feel like it.

[RWyvern]

I'm just posting here over two problems...

 

This one's minor in the grand scheme of things. I'm really wanting to join the competitive scene for a video game I play, but our nearest meet is in the city. I head to said city quite a lot, on the train, but the catch here is that they meet from 4 in the afternoon onwards. It gets dark. And this meet is in one of the dodgier areas. Furthermore, where the tournaments are held is in the northern regions which I really don't want to deal with.

 

Not to mention, the scene's comprised mostly of male players. Nothing against them, but I'd probably feel a little... out of place, I guess.

 

I have plans to drop by one meet during the summer, but I'm still apprehensive and might not even carry said plans out. On top of the fear I'll mess up or something and embarrass myself. I've never been good with group things.

 

~

 

And the other thing.... I'm not going to put too much information out here, but my younger sister is sick. I don't know if anorexia mention calls for a trigger warning, but there it is.

 

She's been living on barely anything, and when my mum did the calculations she found out what my sister's been having up to less than 200 calories daily. She spends all her time lying on her bed woth no energy to do anything and well, she's going to the hospital as soon as possible.

 

I'm just asking for a virtual hug, or some reassurance that everything's going to be okay. I'm really scared over this whole ordeal and I keep on fearing all the worst outcomes. It takes all my effort to not break down in front of my parents when talking about it, or even just seeing my sister in this state.

[Jortaani]

Oh gosh, you're really having hard time there RW

 

Hopefully your sister will get well as soon as possible. I know many people who have suffered from anorexia and made a total comeback after defeating the disease! That's why I totally believe your sister will be okay someday. It might take time but still it will happen, because now she will get the right treatment she needs UwU

 

I wish you a lot of patience and good feelings to get through all this *hugs*

 

Also best of luck for your gaming thing! The meeting is very likely worth visiting, so I hope you'll decide to go there sometime ~~

[Omega Entity]

RW, as far as the gaming thing goes, is there any reason why you can't get someone to go with you? Safety in numbers, and all that.

[Silverfang]

*Big hugs*

 

I have to agree, see if you can get a friend to join you RW. I can't speak of competitively gaming, but I was a hardcore WoWer for years. All the people I played with, they came off as gruff and crude at first, but I realized over time that they were all good guys. They might not be hugs and fluffy animals nice, but they were decent, good folks.

 

As for the after dark concerns, totally reasonable. It's a safety thing, especially in a bad part of town.

 

Whatever happens, I hope you get to try it out and have a good experience.

[Kiti]

my mom's cat has been gone almost a week.

she's going to notice soon :S

 

though I haven't talked to her about the cat at all since me and my dad noticed she'd vanished. I finally got a hold of both animal shelters and asked my next door neigbhor if they saw anthing.

 

My chest is so tight and I had a panic attack over this fluff ball while doing the dishes earlier.

 

I NEED that cat back!

[Silverfang]

*hugs Kiti* oh goodness! I'd be a mess if either my cat or my mothers was missing.

 

Big slow deep breaths. Panicking won't help. My cat didn't come home for three days when I was younger, I was so upset the whole time. Cats are smart, she'll be home, I'm sure.

[Obscure_Trash]

rampaging wyvern, while I am so sorry that your sister (and your family) are going through that, it is so great that she will be getting some help. I hope she takes this seriously and works on a life she can actually life. I am sending my strength and good wishes her way and yours!

[Rachel72]

I would just like to send out a virtual hug... To anyone who needs one....

[HeatherMarie]

Oh wow, that really sucks Emma. Are you sure you can't get ahold of the real teacher some way?

[TehUltimateMage]

@Emma: Most schools have a policy where you can dispute your grade if you feel that you've been judged unfairly. I suggest bringing it to any higher-ups you can talk to, like other teachers or even the dean. TAs sometimes don't know what they're doing, and their decisions can be overruled.

 

 

[Ælex]

I lost my little brother, about two weeks ago. He was a victim of medical malpractice after a reportedly successful appendectomy. I won't go into detail, but we are pressing charges, and hard.

Since the incident, I've been too out of it to get into work, or my university responsibilities. I just always seem to be either fuming with rage about what happened, or unable to stop thinking about the loss.

I've picked up the horrible habit of ending almost every night wasted or flattened on the wacky backy.

Yesterday my family intervened, and now I'm trying to get it together with their help.

I saw this thread, and wanted to ask those who have gone through such a thing, how did you get over it, and more importantly, when?

Edited October 6, 2015 by Ælex

[wtf]

I am so sorry Ælex, that's absolutely horrible

The best thing I can suggest to you is to know that your brother is in a better place. He wouldn't want to see you like this, and right now you should think about getting back into your normal daily life in the hopes of living better for the sake of him, yourself, and your family and friends.

If you have something you love to do, go do it. You don't have to think about your responsibilities right now and focus on trying to get your well-being back on track so that the stress of everything in your life can be brought down to a minimum. Sometimes it's better to just go outside and relax a while instead of mulling over something that you know you cannot change.

There's no set time for anyone, it really depends on you. Acceptance is the first step and the hardest, but try your best and don't push yourself. I really hope this helps

Edited October 6, 2015 by wtf