Relationships!

[Dauntingale]

Mmm, I do know a girl from school I like. Except, I'm way too shy to talk to her. It kinda bugs me a bit >< If you want you can share advice...

JUST TALK TO HER. D: Don't miss your chance dude. Just befriend her, and be yourself. All the usual cliche tips.

 

Really though, you don't want to miss out on what could be the beginning of something great, y'know?

 

EDIT: Oh, but don't get yourself friendzoned.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Dauntingale

[Ashes The Second]

I just had another relationship failure. With someone who is the same gender. ._. I guess I can't hold on to one for more than three months. That hurts.

[Dauntingale]

What exactly does "being friendzoned" mean? I've heard the tearjerker before, but confused in its meaning lol

Haha, tearjerker? Well, that's new.

 

"Friend zoned" = "Let's just be friends, alright?"

 

No possibility of a relationship there ^ you see.

[Dauntingale]

Oops! Didn't catch that. Stupid auto correct. Meant "term" *runs to edit*

 

And thanks for the explanation!

You're welcome. You know, tearjerker really fit into the context of your post.

 

Also, more on topic, I've been debating whether or not to date for a while. There's this guy I've been crushing who asked me out a while back and he still likes me.

 

The problem is, my parents don't let me date. I'm fifteen. :|

Edited July 21, 2012 by Dauntingale

[Mousia]

You're welcome. You know, tearjerker really fit into the context of your post.

 

Also, more on topic, I've been debating whether or not to date for a while. There's this guy I've been crushing who asked me out a while back and he still likes me.

 

The problem is, my parents don't let me date. I'm fifteen. :|

That's sad, Daunt.

 

Anyways, you need to just be friends () until your parents let you date.

 

Honestly, I know people much younger than you who are allowed to date. Do your parents want to 'protect you'd or are they just conservative?

 

Okay, so...in case you want to know about me...

 

My parents let me date, but I am afraid of getting made fun of. There's this guy that I have friendzoned (for safekeeping) that I like but a lot of people make fun of us because everyone knows that we like each other. Advice?

 

P.S. His best friend also likes me, I think, so I friendzoned them both and I don't want to break either of their hearts...so I don't know.

 

 

[Mousia]

I'm in pretty much the same situation.. but neither of us(at least I think he doesn't) want to date yet It doesn't help that he's quite shy and he might move.. to Michigan. We live in PA. -__-

Oh, I'm sorry. Do you both know that you like each other? I mean, I know for sure that he knows and we both know that the other person knows. The more pressing question is...o you know if he knows?

[Mousia]

Yeah he knows. I told him lmao. I then got him to admit that he likes me LOL

If only I had that kind of luck. I think I tipped him off because I laugh way too hard at his jokes. I don't know what to think of this, but when I asked him to pick a song for me to listen to on my MP3 player he picked a song called My Heart is Broken by Evanescence. It is pretty good, but I was surprised.

[Mousia]

Maybe he just likes that song? I wouldn't know what to think of it, either. Just like I'm not really sure what to make of of him playing with my hair in homeroom once... My friend then jokingly accused him of flirting and he got all embaressed and walked away And then on the last day of school, he put his arm on my shoulder in the hallway.... twice..

I group hugged him once on the last day of school and again after it ended.

 

I feel bad for your guy, though. I think, if I were him, I would have stuck out my tongue and kept on playing with your hair. I don't really know why he did that, but I think he likes your hair.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Mousia

[Mousia]

I am never that coordinated. I just have to find him or walk with some other friend.

 

I wish you luck with your friends, though. It seems that you have endless trouble with them. Personally, I think friend-enemies are less important that significant others, but close friends are more important than significant others because:

1.) They will support you if/when your relationship ends,

2.) There are more dating sites than friend-finding sites.

 

Edit- Hi, SPS. What's up with your relationships?

Edited July 21, 2012 by Mousia

[Obscure_Trash]

What exactly does "being friendzoned" mean? I've heard the term before, but confused in its meaning lol

It's commonly used to describe someone who you just want to have sex with, but don't really appreciate enough as a person and only stay in the friendship out of hope that it may one day lead to more. It's quite an insulting term, IMO.

[Mousia]

It's commonly used to describe someone who you just want to have sex with, but don't really appreciate enough as a person and only stay in the friendship out of hope that it may one day lead to more. It's quite an insulting term, IMO.

Nice description, SPS. I think most people on here meant it in a less graphic sense. Plus, I don't think any of us were confident enough to use that wording. Fearless, as always. Anyways, it is more commonly used (at least, where I live) to mean you would like to be in a relationship with them but are not willing to commit for some reason and sometimes it just means that one individual just doesn't want to be involved with another one. Either way, I don't think anyone will be asking for the definition for a long time.

 

Erica: Minecraft? Ooh, romantic! Well, the best I have to show for myself is leaning on him while he was hugging his friend ob Minecraft at the lamest party EVER.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Mousia

[Dauntingale]

I have so many things to say to you two.

 

So, I think I'll just date senior year because my mom won't let me date until the second year of college. To answer your question Mousia, BOTH. They're conservative AND protective. ;n; My mom always tells me about her past and how she didn't date until her early twenties or so.

 

Also, about that song thing. Ohgod. My dude sent me Marry Me by Bruno Mars once and I always listen to Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy. I love those two. Totally go look them up guys. I don't know if they're to your taste though.

 

And Minecraft. Me and him are total gamers. c:

 

EDIT: Also, also, I've leaned on his shoulder before and he always puts his arms around my waist when tickling me. Ho ho ho.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Dauntingale

[Dauntingale]

Same! We were texting eachother Portal credit lyrics last week LOL My friend called it "nerd love" hahahaha

I'm called a nerd allll the time. I totally don't mind because it's like my signature thing. Besides, I'm somewhat athletic too.

 

Omgard. Relationships can get so... frustrating to deal with.

[Dauntingale]

I have never even liked someone before him, so I don't have much experience

D'aw, you're so innocent. ;D

 

Relationships are greaat, until they fall into the toilet, drowning in the pits of hell.

 

My friend was going through a break up. It's all she would talk to me about during that period of time. Sigh.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Dauntingale

[KrazyKarp]

JUST TALK TO HER. D: Don't miss your chance dude. Just befriend her, and be yourself. All the usual cliche tips.

 

Really though, you don't want to miss out on what could be the beginning of something great, y'know?

 

EDIT: Oh, but don't get yourself friendzoned.

I can't.... whenever I try to talk to anybody I get all red and nervous, then my words start getting mixed up. It's the reason I'm on the computer, it's the only way I can make friends without getting so nervous ><

[brairtrainer]

So you're nervous about talking to someone? I recomend focusing on being friends not the romantic stuff. That should help some though it could lead to being friend zoned if you don't move fast enough

[Guest]

I'm both excited yet nervous for my two year anniversary with my boyfriend coming up this August. It's like, every extra year that you are with someone, people just become more confident you'll be together forever, but I've seen so many relationships going down the drain after one, two years. We are young and I honestly don't believe that we'll be together until our dying day, but I'm just scared it goes downhill from here.

[stromzone]

I can't.... whenever I try to talk to anybody I get all red and nervous, then my words start getting mixed up. It's the reason I'm on the computer, it's the only way I can make friends without getting so nervous ><

Bro, EVERYBODY gets their words mixed up. You can't plan what you say, you just need to go up to her and start talking, get her interested, try to make a joke. The longer you talk with her, the more comfortable it'll feel for both of you. When the time is right, admit your feelings for her. Heck, some girls even think being nervous is cute, because it shows that you're really genuine!

 

Good Luck mate!

[Ashes The Second]

My ex basically is like 'I really love you' when I really know he loves the /idea/ of me. He never called me beautiful, I was always random, or sexy to him. :| If you like the person, don't ever mention an ex in the relationship, either. It's okay to say 'I don't like you doing this, please stop', but when he said 'my ex used to do that, please stop', I'm not gonna stop, lol. It's insulting.

 

I think being nervous is cute. :3. Especially when that person is older.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Ashes The Second

[Kelkelen]

It's commonly used to describe someone who you just want to have sex with, but don't really appreciate enough as a person and only stay in the friendship out of hope that it may one day lead to more. It's quite an insulting term, IMO.

Now I'm confused, lol! I thought it was always a rather mean term for when someone wants to date someone else, and that person is not interested and just wants to be friends. As in, "I asked her out and she said she isn't into me that way." "Aw, man, you got friendzoned! Sucks to be you!"

 

I mean, I still think it's a rotten concept, like being a friend is not worth anything, but I didn't think it was meant to describe the person being pursued... more the state of the pursuer (aka, something they say to be snitty about the person they supposedly "love" when that person isn't interested in return).

 

ETA: Like so:

So you're nervous about talking to someone? I recomend focusing on being friends not the romantic stuff. That should help some though it could lead to being friend zoned if you don't move fast enough

 

i.e., "Be careful not to be too good a friend or they'll see you as "JUST" a friend and never feel interested in anything more!" Not really valid. Most successful couples I know of are one another's best friends. A lot of people enter a relationship *because* they are good friends. And if someone gets to know you and then isn't romantically interested, it isn't because you "didn't move fast enough," or didn't do x or y in the proper equation. It's just that they've gotten to know you and aren't romantically interested; so, if you like them as a person enough to TRULY let go of the romantic ideas and just hang out, cool; if not, move on. But you didn't screw up, and they haven't done you wrong by just plain not feeling romantic feelings towards you.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Kelkelen

[Obscure_Trash]

I'm sending you a quote that explains what I'm trying to say better, but that I don't exactly feel comfortable posting. ^^

 

Here, I will say I think we're basically saying the same thing, just looking at it a little differently, maybe?

[renton]

I can't.... whenever I try to talk to anybody I get all red and nervous, then my words start getting mixed up. It's the reason I'm on the computer, it's the only way I can make friends without getting so nervous ><

You care too much what people think of you from what I can tell. Be yourself stop caring and be more confident. I know making friends can be tough especially when you have few. You also need to find the right people to have as friends who share common interests as you do. That's why it's probably easier to make friends on the computer. Well, aside from the "veil" that covers you. You seem to be afraid of judgement from others, so that's why you're a lot more confident behind the monitor.

 

My advice would be to listen to people, not get nervous and try to engage in social norms for conversations depending on the environment. Ask people about themselves and share bits about yourself etc. Don't be embarrassed of yourself, I'm not sure if you are but if you are then let go of that. When you see people like in class etc. greet them and ask them how things are going etc. get a conversation going. Relax . Everything else is just playing by ear.

 

As for the girl you like and you get nervous... Look as dumb as this sounds you only live once and later in life you will ask yourself what could have been if I asked this girl out. Don't be afraid of rejection. If the girl is nice about it and kindly tells you no move on. I know it hurts but you had the coconuts to ask. If she's mean about it then you dodged a bullet. You don't want to be around or with a mean partner. Heck, she could say yes and you can be sitting down talking over a nice cold chai .

 

 

[brairtrainer]

Now I'm confused, lol! I thought it was always a rather mean term for when someone wants to date someone else, and that person is not interested and just wants to be friends. As in, "I asked her out and she said she isn't into me that way." "Aw, man, you got friendzoned! Sucks to be you!"

 

I mean, I still think it's a rotten concept, like being a friend is not worth anything, but I didn't think it was meant to describe the person being pursued... more the state of the pursuer (aka, something they say to be snitty about the person they supposedly "love" when that person isn't interested in return).

 

ETA: Like so:

 

 

i.e., "Be careful not to be too good a friend or they'll see you as "JUST" a friend and never feel interested in anything more!" Not really valid. Most successful couples I know of are one another's best friends. A lot of people enter a relationship *because* they are good friends. And if someone gets to know you and then isn't romantically interested, it isn't because you "didn't move fast enough," or didn't do x or y in the proper equation. It's just that they've gotten to know you and aren't romantically interested; so, if you like them as a person enough to TRULY let go of the romantic ideas and just hang out, cool; if not, move on. But you didn't screw up, and they haven't done you wrong by just plain not feeling romantic feelings towards you.

Quoted for honesty, you did grab what I was trying to say though I feel I should explain myself a bit better.

 

My explaination there was from my expirance that some girls, even nice ones can be down right horribe when they mention that they see you as a friend, (or if you guys get really close...brotherzoned.)

 

I'm saying this as a person who brotherzoned one of my best friends because in the window where I might have been interested in him not only passed but because we were closer that I could see my self with an SO later.

 

I was giving the warning wait to long and you may be too close for comfort for that girl to date you.

 

That's all I was trying to say. My 'brother' made the mistake of not telling me when we were juniors in high school and I started dating this funny, compasonate guy who lives 3 hrs away from me.

 

[KrazyKarp]

You care too much what people think of you from what I can tell. Be yourself stop caring and be more confident. I know making friends can be tough especially when you have few. You also need to find the right people to have as friends who share common interests as you do. That's why it's probably easier to make friends on the computer. Well, aside from the "veil" that covers you. You seem to be afraid of judgement from others, so that's why you're a lot more confident behind the monitor.

 

My advice would be to listen to people, not get nervous and try to engage in social norms for conversations depending on the environment. Ask people about themselves and share bits about yourself etc. Don't be embarrassed of yourself, I'm not sure if you are but if you are then let go of that. When you see people like in class etc. greet them and ask them how things are going etc. get a conversation going. Relax . Everything else is just playing by ear.

 

As for the girl you like and you get nervous... Look as dumb as this sounds you only live once and later in life you will ask yourself what could have been if I asked this girl out. Don't be afraid of rejection. If the girl is nice about it and kindly tells you no move on. I know it hurts but you had the coconuts to ask. If she's mean about it then you dodged a bullet. You don't want to be around or with a mean partner. Heck, she could say yes and you can be sitting down talking over a nice cold chai .

My class is.. um, how do you say it? Wierd. Unusual. A bit idiodic. Most of them I can't stand being around! It's 8 boys and 18 girls not including myself. More than half the girls are wierdos and all the boys are. And the other girls are too shy to be around, aside from the one I like, who always has those wierdos around her but she doesn't seem to be one of them. It's also going to be hard because a guy follows me around probally just to annoy me all school day! So I've had no practice with speaking to other kids because I'm not wanting to be one of those guys... And I'd be made fun of if I talk to any girl.

Hmm, I'm basically praying to God some people with common sense will come to my class this school year!

But this is another reason.

[Alpha1]

I'm sending you a quote that explains what I'm trying to say better, but that I don't exactly feel comfortable posting. ^^

 

Here, I will say I think we're basically saying the same thing, just looking at it a little differently, maybe?

 

Do you mean that in response to the people who complain about it, some will think the following about them?

 

The 5% -- really were in love with their friend

 

The 95% -- just wanted sex