Posted January 10, 2016 (edited) I might be asexual, but I still get the feelings (even if I don't want them). So the closest term I could find is lithsexual. I don't like any type of sexual intimacy. Anyone know a better word for this? Edited January 10, 2016 by JolteonTails Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 99% Of this thread makes me cringe but I would just like to say that humans are not a-seuxal A-Sexual is a biological term used to describe animals that can only reproduce through the following: Binary fission Budding Vegetative reproduction Spore formation Fragmentation Parthenogenesis Agamogenesis Apomixis and nucellar embryony Humans are not a-sexual creatures You do not get to change biology because you want to be special Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) 99% Of this thread makes me cringe but I would just like to say that humans are not a-seuxal A-Sexual is a biological term used to describe animals that can only reproduce through the following: Binary fission Budding Vegetative reproduction Spore formation Fragmentation Parthenogenesis Agamogenesis Apomixis and nucellar embryony Humans are not a-sexual creatures You do not get to change biology because you want to be special We're not discussing the biological term asexual reproduction here, we are discussing the sexual orientation asexuality. "Asexual" has several different meanings based on the context- just like basically 99% of all words in any language. "Sick" can mean something bad in one context "I feel sick today" whilst for others it can be good "What a sick skateboard jump!". Likewise, even "gay" falls under this- it can describe homosexuality or being happy. Please do your research before claiming a certain sexual orientation does not exist. We're not claiming to be able to reproduce via mitosis instead of meiosis- we're saying that we experience no sexual attraction (or limited) towards any gender. p.s. For context, yes I am asexual, and I am a biologist as well Edited January 18, 2016 by bluesonic1 Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) 99% Of this thread makes me cringe but I would just like to say that humans are not a-seuxal A-Sexual is a biological term used to describe animals that can only reproduce through the following: Binary fission Budding Vegetative reproduction Spore formation Fragmentation Parthenogenesis Agamogenesis Apomixis and nucellar embryony Humans are not a-sexual creatures You do not get to change biology because you want to be special Here's a very good, basic resource to learn about asexuality: http://www.asexuality.org/home/?q=overview.html Thanks for expressing your confusion because I love answering questions about asexuality. If you have further questions after reading AVEN, feel free to post! By the by, thought you might be interested in the dictionary definition of asexual: a·sex·u·al āˈsekSH(əw)əl/ adjective adjective: asexual 1. without sexual feelings or associations. "she rested her hand on the back of his head, in a maternal, wholly asexual, gesture" 2. Biology (of reproduction) not involving the fusion of gametes. without sex or sexual organs. "asexual parasites" noun noun: asexual; plural noun: asexuals 1. a person who has no sexual feelings or desires. adjective 1. Biology. having no sex or sexual organs. independent of sexual processes, especially not involving the union of male and female germ cells. 2. free from or unaffected by sexuality: an asexual friendship. EDIT: I suppose I shall also mention that I am asexual and a geobiologist/geochemist/geologist. Edited January 18, 2016 by SockPuppet Strangler Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 We're not discussing the biological term asexual reproduction here, we are discussing the sexual orientation asexuality. "Asexual" has several different meanings based on the context- just like basically 99% of all words in any language. "Sick" can mean something bad in one context "I feel sick today" whilst for others it can be good "What a sick skateboard jump!". Likewise, even "gay" falls under this- it can describe homosexuality or being happy. Please do your research before claiming a certain sexual orientation does not exist. We're not claiming to be able to reproduce via mitosis instead of meiosis- we're saying that we experience no sexual attraction (or limited) towards any gender. p.s. For context, yes I am asexual, and I am a biologist as well From asexuality.org: "Asexual people who experience attraction will often be attracted to a particular gender, and will identify as lesbian, gay, bi, or straight." "For some sexual arousal is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner or partners. Some will occasionally masturbate," The most biased source to get information from in favour of this phenomenon still goes against what you say: "we're saying that we experience no sexual attraction (or limited) towards any gender." There is a difference between being introverted and a-sexual If you have ever been sexually aroused you are not a-sexual There's nothing wrong with not wanting to have sex but that is a personal choice Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 Well Txngo, that would be like me saying "you're not gay if you're attracted to the same gender. Gay means happy. Your attraction to the same gender is a choice." Just because you are not familiar with the term asexual being used in this context does not mean it doesn't exist. There is a scientific term referring to certain animal reproduction methods, but that is not the only meaning of the term. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 There is a difference between being introverted and a-sexual I wasn't aware that the introvert/extrovert continuum had anything to do with sexual attraction or activity. Isn't it based around the need/desire for social contact? Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) From asexuality.org: "Asexual people who experience attraction will often be attracted to a particular gender, and will identify as lesbian, gay, bi, or straight." "For some sexual arousal is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner or partners. Some will occasionally masturbate," The most biased source to get information from in favour of this phenomenon still goes against what you say: "we're saying that we experience no sexual attraction (or limited) towards any gender." There is a difference between being introverted and a-sexual If you have ever been sexually aroused you are not a-sexual There's nothing wrong with not wanting to have sex but that is a personal choice Introversion has nothing to do with any type of sexual orientation or sexuality- that is a personality trait. I do see your confusion with regards to "If you have ever been sexually aroused you are not a-sexual". Like I mentioned before, and I made sure to pick my words carefully for this exact reason, is that asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to any gender. This is different to having a libido, which many refer in these texts as being aroused in general. To put it in a crude way, you can think of asexuality as people wanting to masturbate instead of engaging in sexual acts with others- for most other orientations, this is the other way around. Again, the libido case differs between people, which is why that explanation is crude but I hope it helps you understand that particular aspect better- only the lack of sexual attraction is the true definition of asexuality. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to have sex but that is a personal choice That's called celibacy- choosing not to have sex despite wanting to. In the case of asexuals, the want was never there. It's not a choice for us- this is a common misunderstanding across the sexuality spectrum I think- no orientation is really a choice, it's who you are. Edited January 18, 2016 by bluesonic1 Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 From asexuality.org: "Asexual people who experience attraction will often be attracted to a particular gender, and will identify as lesbian, gay, bi, or straight." "we're saying that we experience no sexual attraction (or limited) towards any gender." That first line I do believe refers to romantic attraction, which is different. After finding out I was asexual, and I wanted to know what sexual attraction was, I really had to dig around to understand what it was. It was difficult for me to understand, but reading up on it helped. And, sadly enough, there were a couple episodes of the Big Bang Theory that helped as well. He's a fast talker, but if this video hasn't been dropped in here before, I'm going to: Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 That first line I do believe refers to romantic attraction, which is different. After finding out I was asexual, and I wanted to know what sexual attraction was, I really had to dig around to understand what it was. It was difficult for me to understand, but reading up on it helped. And, sadly enough, there were a couple episodes of the Big Bang Theory that helped as well. He's a fast talker, but if this video hasn't been dropped in here before, I'm going to: That video is amazing, thanks for the link. I had completely forgotten about the sexual behaviour component .___. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) Well Txngo, that would be like me saying "you're not gay if you're attracted to the same gender. Gay means happy. Your attraction to the same gender is a choice." Just because you are not familiar with the term asexual being used in this context does not mean it doesn't exist. There is a scientific term referring to certain animal reproduction methods, but that is not the only meaning of the term. You don't slaughter the definition of a biological term just so you can call yourself a-sexual Just by going through pages on this thread u will find like 500 different 'sexualities' There's a difference between personality / interests and sexuality Don't make up a new sexuality every other day to describe yourself Just because you haven't had the desire for sex recently doesn't mean you are a-sexual If you want to make up a new sexuality for people who don't experience sexual attraction (Something that all humans experience unless you have social or physical disorder(s)), you can do that, just don't steal a biological term to justify it I'm a homo-romantic genderfluid gray-asexual fox-kin Edited January 18, 2016 by Txngo Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) You don't slaughter the definition of a biological term just so you can call yourself a-sexual Just by going through pages on this thread u will find like 500 different 'sexualities' There's a difference between personality / interests and sexuality Don't make up a new sexuality every other day to describe yourself Just because you haven't had the desire for sex recently doesn't mean you are a-sexual If you want to make up a new sexuality for people who don't experience sexual attraction (Something that all humans experience unless you have social or physical disorders -- like aspergers), you can do that, just don't steal a biological term to justify it I'm a homo-romantic genderfluid gray-asexual fox-kin So... I don't get the anger about 'slaughtering' a biological term. 'A' as a prefix simply means 'without'. Following the same naming system as homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, etc... asexual makes perfect sense as a label. Even if it didn't, the name has caught on. I suppose people could call themselves 'nonsexual', but that's not used very much. It should also be obvious, using contextual clues, what the person is talking about. There is no chance of getting them confused in day-to-day conversation. Also going to add that you're adding a lot of criteria that you think asexual people should meet, despite the fact that you seen to hate the existence of the term. It's massively impractical and borders on elitism. If you're saying anyone who has ever been sexually aroused is asexual, does that mean that someone who was once slightly turned on when they were 14 but has never ever felt anything since, and certainly not towards a person, cannot use the label? They'd have to explain to a partner that, no, I have never ever felt attraction to anyone in my life, but one time I got a little hot and flustered... which totally means that I'm heterosexual for all practical purposes. Or homosexual. Or bisexual. I mean, given that they've never felt any sexual attraction, they could be any one of those. But, clearly, they are not allowed to identify as asexual because you say so, and you clearly know better than they do concerning their own identity. So they're... what, exactly, if not asexual? The asexual community generally discourages the use of the label among people that have lost their sex drive, because it is often temporary. (with exceptions) It's not just a case for no 'recent' desire for sex. Also, saying all people who are asexual have disorders is incredibly offensive, and it just isn't your place to say. Do you have any proof of this? Have there been extensive personality and psychological assessments done on every single asexual person in the world which prove they all have some sort of disorder? No. You mocking the community of people that use ridiculous labels has nothing to do with asexuality whatsoever. That's a completely separate argument and it isn't valid to this whatsoever. /essay /rant Edited January 18, 2016 by quupee Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 (edited) If you want to make up a new sexuality for people who don't experience sexual attraction (Something that all humans experience unless you have social or physical disorder(s)), you can do that, just don't steal a biological term to justify it I'm a homo-romantic genderfluid gray-asexual fox-kin ...are you serious? How do you know that *everyone* experiences sexual attraction? Why are you bashing people with disorders and mocking identities? Where are your sources? Also, the word "cell" is used in biology to describe the smallest unit in an organism. Cell can also be used to described a small room or even "a basic and usually small unit of an organization or movement," (Merriam Webster). Bam, there's a word that's used in biology that has multiple definitions, so I don't see an issue with the word asexual also referring to a sexuality. With the help of context, I'm sure you can figure out if someone's talking about asexual reproduction or asexual as in the sexuality. As for your "500 different 'sexualities" comment, sexuality is more of a spectrum, not a binary. EDIT: FYI, I consider myself demiromantic ace :^) Edited January 18, 2016 by XiaoChibi Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 So... I don't get the anger about 'slaughtering' a biological term. 'A' as a prefix simply means 'without'. Following the same naming system as homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, etc... asexual makes perfect sense as a label. Even if it didn't, the name has caught on. I suppose people could call themselves 'nonsexual', but that's not used very much. It should also be obvious, using contextual clues, what the person is talking about. There is no chance of getting them confused in day-to-day conversation. Also going to add that you're adding a lot of criteria that you think asexual people should meet, despite the fact that you seen to hate the existence of the term. It's massively impractical and borders on elitism. If you're saying anyone who has ever been sexually aroused is asexual, does that mean that someone who was once slightly turned on when they were 14 but has never ever felt anything since, and certainly not towards a person, cannot use the label? They'd have to explain to a partner that, no, I have never ever felt attraction to anyone in my life, but one time I got a little hot and flustered... which totally means that I'm heterosexual for all practical purposes. Or homosexual. Or bisexual. I mean, given that they've never felt any sexual attraction, they could be any one of those. But, clearly, they are not allowed to identify as asexual because you say so, and you clearly know better than they do concerning their own identity. So they're... what, exactly, if not asexual? The asexual community generally discourages the use of the label among people that have lost their sex drive, because it is often temporary. (with exceptions) It's not just a case for no 'recent' desire for sex. Also, saying all people who are asexual have disorders is incredibly offensive, and it just isn't your place to say. Do you have any proof of this? Have there been extensive personality and psychological assessments done on every single asexual person in the world which prove they all have some sort of disorder? No. You mocking the community of people that use ridiculous labels has nothing to do with asexuality whatsoever. That's a completely separate argument and it isn't valid to this whatsoever. /essay /rant Not going to break down this entire essay but... "does that mean that someone who was once slightly turned on when they were 14 but has never ever felt anything since, and certainly not towards a person, cannot use the label?" Yes, because if you are born without sexual, that means you will never experience sexual arousal from another person You even said this yourself: "The asexual community generally discourages the use of the label among people that have lost their sex drive, because it is often temporary." If they were sexual when they were 14 and then lost their sex drive, they shouldn't use the term a-sexual according to you "It's not just a case for no 'recent' desire for sex." But you just said that if a 14 year old didn't experience it for a long time they are a-sexual? Also I am not saying that everyone who calls themselves a-sexual has a mental disorder, I am saying that all humans are born sexual (Except for those with disorders like birth defects ect.) Even on a-sexuality.org they state that a-sexual people have a tendency to masturbate so obviously they experience some sexual attraction about members of the sex of their preference and are simulating sex with themselves (Because they enjoy it) Also don't call me offensive This isn't elementary school I hope that you can have a mature debate with someone without feeling offended Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 ...are you serious? How do you know that *everyone* experiences sexual attraction? Why are you bashing people with disorders and mocking identities? Where are your sources? Also, the word "cell" is used in biology to describe the smallest unit in an organism. Cell can also be used to described a small room or even "a basic and usually small unit of an organization or movement," (Merriam Webster). Bam, there's a word that's used in biology that has multiple definitions, so I don't see an issue with the word asexual also referring to a sexuality. With the help of context, I'm sure you can figure out if someone's talking about asexual reproduction or asexual as in the sexuality. As for your "500 different 'sexualities" comment, sexuality is more of a spectrum, not a binary. EDIT: FYI, I consider myself demiromantic ace :^) I know that everyone experiences sexual attraction because I understand basic fundamentals of biology It's even stated on asexuality.org Also, no one identifies as a cell No one is spreading lies about being a cell Share this post Link to post
Posted January 18, 2016 Even on a-sexuality.org they state that a-sexual people have a tendency to masturbate so obviously they experience some sexual attraction about members of the sex of their preference and are simulating sex with themselves (Because they enjoy it) I'm not sure how masturbation can be considered indicative of sexual attraction, since fantasizing about a person or situation isn't required for the physical stimulation to feel good. It would certainly mean the person got aroused, but I don't think that necessarily equates to having sexual feelings for other people. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 (edited) I'm demi-heterosexual demi-heteroromantic (as far as I've experienced). I didn't start dating until I almost finished high school. And I certainly didn't feel any attractions to anyone at the time that I tried a bit of masturbation. I tried it for a little bit, off and on, as exploration. Beyond that, it did nothing for me. I got no stimulation from it but I gained a bit of knowledge about myself. Txngo, I don't know how you came to the conclusion that masturbation is the be-all/end-all to deciding whether someone is attracted to another person or not (at least sexually). Not everyone experiences sexual attraction. It's chemically based. Just like some chemicals in a person's body can decide whether they're more likely to be addicted to alcohol/drugs or have an attraction towards one gender instead of another. It works the same for asexuality. The person just has no attraction sexually. The same goes for aromantic individuals. Edited January 19, 2016 by Narvix Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 I know that everyone experiences sexual attraction because I understand basic fundamentals of biology It's even stated on asexuality.org Also, no one identifies as a cell No one is spreading lies about being a cell Actually, you'd be wrong. As an adult Aro/Ace individual, I have zero sex drive. None. Nada. Zip. I have never experienced anything resembling sexual attraction, nor do I masturbate. I am perfectly comfortable with this but your behavior implies that sex is required. It's not. Before you go about making claims like everyone experiences sexual attraction, you might want to think a little bit about people like me. I am asexual. Not asexual-reproducing so stop pulling that weird card on a Biology major. We aren't talking about cells. Stop talking about cells. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 Not going to break down this entire essay but... "does that mean that someone who was once slightly turned on when they were 14 but has never ever felt anything since, and certainly not towards a person, cannot use the label?" Yes, because if you are born without sexual, that means you will never experience sexual arousal from another person You even said this yourself: "The asexual community generally discourages the use of the label among people that have lost their sex drive, because it is often temporary." If they were sexual when they were 14 and then lost their sex drive, they shouldn't use the term a-sexual according to you "It's not just a case for no 'recent' desire for sex." But you just said that if a 14 year old didn't experience it for a long time they are a-sexual? Also I am not saying that everyone who calls themselves a-sexual has a mental disorder, I am saying that all humans are born sexual (Except for those with disorders like birth defects ect.) Even on a-sexuality.org they state that a-sexual people have a tendency to masturbate so obviously they experience some sexual attraction about members of the sex of their preference and are simulating sex with themselves (Because they enjoy it) Also don't call me offensive This isn't elementary school I hope that you can have a mature debate with someone without feeling offended Mmkay I'm going to try and make this quick, I appreciate the last one was quite long, and might have been too much to read given that the majority was misread. You have used the terms 'sexual attraction', 'sexual arousal', and 'sex drive' almost totally interchangeably. There are very, very distinct differences between the three, and you have completely ignored them. You also tried to clarify that you didn't say all people who were asexual have disorders (which you did by saying that all people are sexual unless they have a disorder, with no ifs and no buts) by saying that all humans are born sexual unless they have a disorder or birth defect. I am struggling to see how this doesn't translate directly to 'all asexuals have disorders or are defective'. Do you not see how that's potentially very upsetting for someone who is struggling with asexuality? Or why that could be, yes, considered offensive? Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 You don't slaughter the definition of a biological term just so you can call yourself a-sexual Just by going through pages on this thread u will find like 500 different 'sexualities' There's a difference between personality / interests and sexuality Don't make up a new sexuality every other day to describe yourself Just because you haven't had the desire for sex recently doesn't mean you are a-sexual If you want to make up a new sexuality for people who don't experience sexual attraction (Something that all humans experience unless you have social or physical disorder(s)), you can do that, just don't steal a biological term to justify it I'm a homo-romantic genderfluid gray-asexual fox-kin no one is "making up" any sexualities. sexuality is a fluid thing that keeps changing and has been around for a long, long time--it's only recently that opportunities to come forth and feel comfortable being who you are and what you identify as have been appearing, thanks to general acceptance and a supportive community being built up. it's not a biological term in this context. context is everything. the term asexuality isn't strictly restricted to biology. that's like saying i can't use most of the words in the english language that have more than one meaning when directly applied in contrast to literary terms. also, don't mock otherkin nor gender. don't you dare mock something that helps people cope with mental illness and/or make them feel more comfortable being who they are. don't place 'grammar' above a human being. there's a certain moral high ground to live up to. not every person has a sexual drive, and they're perfectly happy as they are. myself, i'm panromantic polysexual. no one here is talking about cells when they mention asexuality. english is a living language. terms change. asexuality isn't just two cells splitting apart. if you insist on sticking to that definition, then the cells of your body are constantly reproducing. you are asexual, so to speak. also, a person with a disorder can still be actively sexual--it's up to the person. the thought that only people born neurotypical and 'normal', by your standards, can have/feel sexual attraction, is incredibly ableist. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 It's only very recently that I've come to terms with and revealed to my family and some friends that I'm asexual, and have been my whole life. And would you believe it, I'm on the autism spectrum. Whoopdee-freakin'-doo, that explains it. No. I know other people on the spectrum that have a sex drive, and I know 'normal' people that lack one. 'Normal' used lightly in this context, because I dislike alienating people who don't fit in with social norms. I have never understood sexual feelings. I find them interesting subject to study, but I have never felt them myself and likely never will do unless something changes wildly. I don't fully understand the focus of sex in movies and other such media, as I know it's often intended to show how much a character loves another - but it doesn't make a connection I can relate to. I identify myself as asexual, potentially panromantic. And no amount of dissing is going to make me change that. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 Seriously, we like just had this fight like two pages ago over the word "bisexual." Which was also originally a term in biology that had a very different meaning in terms of sexuality. There has been an alternate term or two floated for "asexual" in order to differentiate it from the original biological term, but let's be real. "Asexual" has become part of the vernacular. It's not gonna change quickly. But y'know, if you're going to insist that you know what people can and can't experience better than the people trying to explain their experiences to you, we're gonna get nowhere in discussion. Seriously recommend that vlogbrothers video on the last page. -- Though, just for my personal interest, question for the ace folks: Is asexuality kind of a spectrum within itself? Or am I also mixing up the sexuality v. sex drive thing? 'Cause y'know, you hear of folks who identify as ace who're anywhere from sex repulsed to willing to have sex for their partner's sake, and I'm just wondering how y'all look at that. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 You don't slaughter the definition of a biological term just so you can call yourself a-sexual Just by going through pages on this thread u will find like 500 different 'sexualities' There's a difference between personality / interests and sexuality Don't make up a new sexuality every other day to describe yourself Just because you haven't had the desire for sex recently doesn't mean you are a-sexual If you want to make up a new sexuality for people who don't experience sexual attraction (Something that all humans experience unless you have social or physical disorder(s)), you can do that, just don't steal a biological term to justify it I'm a homo-romantic genderfluid gray-asexual fox-kin I'm sorry you feel like that. However, there's quite a simple solution. If you don't like the term asexual: don't use it! It's not for you. It's for me and people like me who experience no or limited sexual attraction. But it's not your job to police other's identities. Asexual as a word in regards to sexual orientation has been in use at least since 2001. We've managed a lot of traction and to gain a lot of awareness. It's the word now that many of us know. It makes no sense to change it just because it also happens to have another definition. It's hardly the only word with more than one definition. Ex: wear1 wer/ verb verb: wear; 3rd person present: wears; past tense: wore; gerund or present participle: wearing; past participle: worn 1. have on one's body or a part of one's body as clothing, decoration, protection, or for some other purpose. "he was wearing a dark suit" synonyms: dress in, be clothed in, have on, sport, model; More put on, don "he wore a suit" habitually have on one's body or be dressed in. "although she was a widow, she didn't wear black" exhibit or present (a particular facial expression or appearance). "they wear a frozen smile on their faces" synonyms: bear, have (on one's face), show, display, exhibit; More give, put on, assume "Barbara wore a smile" have (one's hair or beard) at a specified length or arranged in a specified style. "the students wore their hair long" (of a ship) fly (a flag). 2. damage, erode, or destroy by friction or use. "the track has been worn down in part to bare rock" synonyms: erode, abrade, rub away, grind away, wash away, crumble (away), wear down; More corrode, eat away (at), dissolve "the bricks have been worn down" undergo damage, erosion, or destruction by friction or use. "mountains are wearing down with each passing second" form (a hole, path, etc.) by constant friction or use. "the water was forced up through holes it had worn" cause weariness or fatigue to. "some losses can wear on you" 3. withstand continued use or life in a specified way. "a carpet-type finish seems to wear well" synonyms: last, endure, hold up, bear up, prove durable "the tires are wearing well" Britishinformal tolerate; accept. "the environmental health people wouldn't wear it" 4. (of a period of time) pass, especially slowly or tediously. "as the afternoon wore on, he began to look unhappy" synonyms: pass, elapse, proceed, advance, progress, go by, roll by, march on, slip by/away, fly by/past "the afternoon wore on" literary pass (a period of time) in some activity. "spinning long stories, wearing half the day" noun noun: wear 1. the wearing of something or the state of being worn as clothing. "some new tops for wear in the evening" 2. clothing suitable for a particular purpose or of a particular type. "evening wear" synonyms: clothes, clothing, garments, dress, attire, garb, wardrobe; More informalgetup, gear, togs, duds; formalapparel; literaryarray "evening wear" 3. damage or deterioration sustained from continuous use. "you need to make a deduction for wear and tear on all your belongings" synonyms: damage, friction, erosion, attrition, abrasion; weathering "the varnish will withstand wear" the capacity for withstanding continuous use without damage. "old things were relegated to the bedrooms because there was plenty of wear left in them" synonyms: use, wearing, service, utility, value; informalmileage "you won't get much wear out of that" wear2 wer/ verbSailing verb: wear; 3rd person present: wears; past tense: wore; past participle: wore; gerund or present participle: wearing bring (a ship) about by turning its head away from the wind. "Shannon gives the order to wear ship" Besides that, language evolves. Language evolves as people evolves. It's a natural thing. But if you're so interested in strict definitions of words, let's mention that it makes no sense to accuse us of "slaughtering" a word. slaugh·ter ˈslôdər/ noun noun: slaughter 1. the killing of animals for food. the killing of a large number of people or animals in a cruel or violent way; massacre. plural noun: slaughters "the slaughter of 20 peaceful demonstrators" synonyms: massacre, murdering, (mass) murder, mass killing, mass execution, annihilation, extermination, liquidation, decimation, carnage, butchery, genocide; literaryslaying "the slaughter of 20 demonstrators" carnage, bloodshed, bloodletting, bloodbath "a scene of slaughter" informal a thorough defeat. "an absolute slaughter by the Red Sox" verb verb: slaughter; 3rd person present: slaughters; past tense: slaughtered; past participle: slaughtered; gerund or present participle: slaughtering 1. kill (animals) for food. synonyms: kill, butcher "the animals were slaughtered" kill (people or animals) in a cruel or violent way, typically in large numbers. "innocent civilians are being slaughtered" synonyms: massacre, murder, butcher, kill (off), annihilate, exterminate, liquidate, eliminate, destroy, decimate, wipe out, put to death; literaryslay "innocent civilians are being slaughtered" informal defeat (an opponent) thoroughly. "our team was slaughtered in the finals" But when you say "slaughter the definition" we still understand what you mean (even if we don't agree)! Much like people can still understand that when I say "I'm asexual" it means I don't experience sexual attraction, not that I'm a cell capable of parthenogenesis or whatever you would make of that weird grammar. Also, clearly not everybody experiences sexual attraction or we wouldn't have created the term asexual to define ourselves. And even if all of us had a social or physical disorder - so what? Why would that be a reason to invalidate us and tell us our experiences don't count? We experience what we experience. Nobody can take that away from us. Also also, we're not making up sexualities. We're making up words. All words are made up. But anyway, I've moved away from my original point which is: you don't like the terms? Fine! Don't use them to describe yourself. ^^ The asexual community generally discourages the use of the label among people that have lost their sex drive, because it is often temporary. (with exceptions) It's not just a case for no 'recent' desire for sex. I strongly object to policing people's identity. If someone loses their sexual attraction, even temporarily, and wants to use the label asexual to define themselves, they should feel free to! People are/can be fluid. Things happen and things can change. We should not be restricted to the very first term we ever came out as. We should not be glued in place to an extremely strict label system. Labels should be for us to better communicate. So if someone, for example, takes some meds and loses their sexual attraction, asexual would be a perfectly viable label for them if they want to use it. I am saying that all humans are born sexual (Except for those with disorders like birth defects ect.) I heartily disagree with the notion that babies are born with sexual desires. This isn't elementary school I hope that you can have a mature debate with someone without feeling offended Thank you, but when facing personal attacks, people are completely justified in feeling attacked, harassed, or offended. Just like you don't have a right to police someone's identity, you also don't have a right to tell them how to feel. Yes, because if you are born without sexual, that means you will never experience sexual arousal from another person Attraction =/= arousal at·trac·tion əˈtrakSH(ə)n/ noun noun: attraction; plural noun: attractions the action or power of evoking interest, pleasure, or liking for someone or something. "she has romantic ideas about sexual attraction" synonyms: appeal, attractiveness, desirability, seductiveness, seduction, allure, animal magnetism; More charisma, charm, beauty, good looks, eye-appeal "she had lost whatever attraction she once had" antonyms: repulsion a quality or feature of something or someone that evokes interest, liking, or desire. "this reform has many attractions for those on the left" a thing or place that draws visitors by providing something of interest or pleasure. "the church is the town's main tourist attraction" synonyms: entertainment, activity, diversion, interest "the fair offers sideshows and other attractions" a·rou·sal əˈrouzl/ noun noun: arousal; plural noun: arousals the action or fact of arousing or being aroused. "sexual arousal in dreams is common" (Wow, that's a terrible definition) a·rouse əˈrouz/ verb past tense: aroused; past participle: aroused 1. excite (someone) sexually. synonyms: excite, stimulate, titillate; More informalturn on, get going, give a thrill to, light someone's fire "his touch aroused her" antonyms: turn off To be sexually attracted to someone involves arousal, yes. But arousal does not have to be due to sexual attraction. I know that everyone experiences sexual attraction because I understand basic fundamentals of biology It's even stated on asexuality.org Please give me the quote and exact location you found this. I'd like to clear up this misunderstanding. Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 Though, just for my personal interest, question for the ace folks: Is asexuality kind of a spectrum within itself? Or am I also mixing up the sexuality v. sex drive thing? 'Cause y'know, you hear of folks who identify as ace who're anywhere from sex repulsed to willing to have sex for their partner's sake, and I'm just wondering how y'all look at that. Yes, absolutely. Like trans, asexual has a specific definition but it is also an umbrella term. Asexual, demisexual, gray-asexual, lithsexual, cupiosexual, fraysexual, etc. All varying experiences with sexual attraction that fall on the asexual spectrum. Then there's also having none to low to varying to high libido/sex drive. There's also sex-repulsion which is different from "sex-negative". These things are not asexual specific, though. I agree that libido or repulsion also occur on a spectrum but it is not an asexual spectrum. Things like willing to have sex or "sex-positive" or "sex-neutral" or "sex-negative" are opinions/preferences - also not things that are on the asexual spectrum. Everyone has a degree of how they feel about sex and when/why they're willing to do it. Not asexual specific, although you may hear the conversations more often in asexual circles. ^^ Share this post Link to post
Posted January 19, 2016 "Sexual" is just an adjective, something that just denotes that it has something to do with sex in one form or another... Here I don't actually see where the linguistic argument of _sexual attraction and _sexual reproduction comes from, since the word has the same meaning in both instances. Both a type of attraction and reproduction have something to do with sex. Attraction that has to do with sex, and reproduction that has to do with sex. I don't really see asexuality as having its own spectrum - more as one outer corner of whatever shape our sexuality spectrum ... space ... polygon currently is. There are other things that are very close to that corner, but just slightly also offset towards something else. Libido is pretty much its own thing. Share this post Link to post
Recommended Posts