Description Force!

[BrazenChase]

51 minutes ago, Herk said:

 

 

Depends - if it's a question at the end you could end in an ellipsis that works for at least some cases or if it's in the middle you could try the format "What would Herk do - probably cheat around the issue" or just rewrite completely :/

 

That has been an issue for years

Ah... Unfortunately, the question is part of some dialogue. Drat. 

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

What I often do to avoid question marks is use "<whoever> asks..." sort of thing, but I don't think that would work in your specific case. Looking at your description again, I think you should be able to work your question into a statement (i.e. quoting your dragon as saying, "I find life is but a grand chase.") While it may not be as elegant, it conveys the same concept you're trying to express with the question without using the non-existent punctuation mark. 

[Lagie]

6 hours ago, BrazenChase said:

TIL that question marks don't work in descriptions.

 

Is there a workaround to this or am I screwed?

In one of mine, I just left them out entirely. 

https://dragcave.net/view/nfAQm

 

[BrazenChase]

14 hours ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

What I often do to avoid question marks is use "<whoever> asks..." sort of thing, but I don't think that would work in your specific case. Looking at your description again, I think you should be able to work your question into a statement (i.e. quoting your dragon as saying, "I find life is but a grand chase.") While it may not be as elegant, it conveys the same concept you're trying to express with the question without using the non-existent punctuation mark. 

Ah, there's the initials from the response, that's a great idea! Thank you, I'll have to do just that ^^

 

13 hours ago, Lagie said:

In one of mine, I just left them out entirely. 

https://dragcave.net/view/nfAQm

 

I almost snorted out my tea, Lagie xD

[Lagie]

7 hours ago, BrazenChase said:

I almost snorted out my tea, Lagie xD

Happy to amuse!

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

NEIGT's shinning armour is not at all effective as a form of defence. Instead, the metal sheathing is meant to reflect his natural light to improve the range of his bioluminescent communication as he spreads the news among denizens of the deep. He loves to take the role of messenger and often is a escapiece for rifts and other ill-illuminated abyssal denizens, who often watch conversations between their brighter neighbours. He once helped a rift whose neighbours of a century had no idea she was there because neither was ever close enough to see the glow from her mouth. His goal is to spread community through communication.

Moderator Reject: escapiece? defense not defence

 

Sorry, let me explain the "escapiece" part. When I wrote this I started with "mouthpiece" but since deep sea dragons (at least, in this part of the abyssal plains) use light to communicate over far greater distances than either telepathy or vocalizations can reach, using a mouth as a metaphor didn't make any sense. The "esca" is the glowy-blob-on-a-stick organ on an anglerfish (also present on deep sea dragons). I feel like there should be another, more generic term for 'light-emitting organ' but my quick internet search didn't come up with anything. Do I need to change that, and if so what would be a good wording? Or is explaining the esca enough and I can resubmit (after fixing my brittish spelling of defence/defense)?

[Kaini]

28 minutes ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

Sorry, let me explain the "escapiece" part. When I wrote this I started with "mouthpiece" but since deep sea dragons (at least, in this part of the abyssal plains) use light to communicate over far greater distances than either telepathy or vocalizations can reach, using a mouth as a metaphor didn't make any sense. The "esca" is the glowy-blob-on-a-stick organ on an anglerfish (also present on deep sea dragons). I feel like there should be another, more generic term for 'light-emitting organ' but my quick internet search didn't come up with anything. Do I need to change that, and if so what would be a good wording? Or is explaining the esca enough and I can resubmit (after fixing my brittish spelling of defence/defense)?

 

BRITISH SPELLING DEFEATS ME AGAIN. That's what I get for going through quickly, I was kinda speed running since there's over 1,000 waiting. 

 

The British spelling is fine, and your explanation makes sense to me. It just wasn't technically a word and without the explanation I had no idea what that meant go ahead and resubmit!

Edited February 17, 2020 by Kaini

[Feathers]

Quote

Silvermoon was raised by his adopted mother, Shimmertears, after she found his egg floating in a river. She saved and hatched him, raising him alongside her as she traveled the continent in nomadic solitude. From his youth, the only constants in Silvermoon's life were his mother's stoic, silent traveling and the moon. He used to imagine that he could even hear the moon speaking to him sometimes, just before he fell asleep.
When he reached his maturity, he finally asked his mother where he had come from: it was his time to learn about his birth, a question he'd held his entire life. Shimmertears directed him to the riverbank where she'd found him, and he followed the river upstream to discover the Valley of the Moon, a hidden sect of dragons who worship the moon in secrecy and isolation from any outsiders.
He hasn't been able to get too close yet, but Silvermoon can be patient. His history is here, his blood, he's sure of it, as sure as if the Moon herself whispered it to his heart.

Thank you to whomever noticed this typo! I definitely misnamed the dragon and you caught it -- her name is ShimmerMOON, not ShimmerTEARS. And hey, it's given me a couple extra characters to work with!

 

Also, if anyone else here has come across my dragon descriptions and left a nice comment (there was probably some reference to a Great War, or a simply distasteful amount of Angst), thank you. I've been in a deep valley for a while, and writing these descriptions has been the first creative thing I've really felt excited about in a while. Thanks for giving me feedback, and for taking the time to leave a comment, and for brightening my dark little hole.

 

[Dirtytabs]

On 2/21/2020 at 10:58 PM, Feathers said:

simply distasteful amount of Angst

This phrasing made me chuckle. I can't say I've seen any descriptions yet that struck me as terribly weepy. I'm glad description writing has provided a fun outlet for you.

 

 

Can't link to the pending descrip because she's dead:

Quote

"I'll get them. Just watch. I'll get them," Gainful mutters. Her death was not a pretty sight, and now, this undead dragon can only repeat her last few thoughts. Late October, denizens of Lake Villa pooled together their harvest, building a pile of squashes, pumpkins, marrows, and other gourds of various types at the civic center. Gainful plotted to steal as many as she could, though typical for an adolescent, she didn't put much thought into the plan. Some of her friends egged her on, while others worried about getting in trouble. She spotted some squashes and a pine pumpkin, and, declaring that her spatial magic was all she needed, began floating the targeted items out. Things seemed to go well, but loosening the pumpkin caused the whole heap of gourds to collapse in a rush of fruit. People nearby scattered as colorful, bloody chunks were flung in all directions, while those at a distance could only stare in shock. Before their eyes, they witnessed a dragon violently gourd to death.

• Accept: Squashed by a squash! - KoD
• Accept:
• Accept: This description is a thing of beauty. Every now and then, a description comes along that is an absolute treat to read, and this is one of them.

Thank you so much, anonymous - this was fun to write and such a challenge to fit in 1000 characters! Also why I couldn't incorporate a "squash" pun.

[Lagie]

You know... while we're all stuck at home, this might be a good time to do another DraDeWriMo event. Maybe we could even snag a mod to assist us with approvals and stuff. ( @Kaini)

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

I could help come up with some description-writing prompts if you want.

[Lagie]

6 minutes ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

I could help come up with some description-writing prompts if you want.

That would be great!  Maybe we could all do some?

I also have links to two sets from previous events:

https://pastebin.com/bGJaRGFn

https://forums.dragcave.net/topic/158360-description-force/page/56/#comment-9516847

 

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

I hashed out a few prompts that aren't on those lists, but a few things I came up with were also duplicates. Should I just start posting whatever I come up with, or are we going to set a start date and keep track of thins semi-officially?

...Did I suggest pantoums last time around? I must've, since it's on the list. What was I thinking? That's a hard form to write in english. Granted, I have two on my scroll, but still - not what I would normally recommend for someone who isn't used to wordsmithing.

Edited March 26, 2020 by Kakaru_of_DOOM

[Lagie]

It may just be you and I, but I'd love a few ideas so post away!

(I doubt I'll be poetry-ing, though.)

[Mathcat]

I am currently working from home, which means I'm putting in more hours now than I was before. (I'm lucky, though. My job probably isn't going anywhere.) I also haven't felt much like writing since the pandemic hit. For both of those reasons, I'll probably sit this one out.

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

Sorry that we won't have you, Mathcat, but sounds like it's a good thing your work is still working. 

 

Here are my first two writing prompts for the event:

- A dragon who has read his/her/its own breed description and has something to say about it.

 

- A dragon who aspires to be some other kind of dragon.

[Lagie]

https://dragcave.net/view/A308F

A308F thinks he's a balloon dragon. The other dragons are always pointing out his egg didn't float, and that he's purple not balloon dragon-coloured (none of them can agree on what colour to call it!), but this never manages to convince him. A308F often uses his rift abilities to mimic floating but since his body is still that of a young hatchling these attempts are seldom successful and he ends up sprawled on the ground, hoping no one saw him.

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

Okay, here are two more writing prompts:

- A dragon who has strong food preferences.

- An emergency preparedness dragon!

[Dirtytabs]

Thanks to a past DraDeWriMo, I have doggerel on my scroll. Never again.  

[Lagie]

6 hours ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

- An emergency preparedness dragon!

https://dragcave.net/view/qmgjv

Corona is always ready for any emergency. In a blizzard, she's there with blankets and firestarters. If it's raining, she has a boat at the ready just in case it floods. Ahead the advancing hurricane, she can be seen fastening boards across the entrance to her cave. Her biggest fear is a medical emergency. She's not a medic so she's not sure what the best solution would be. She speaks of things like flattening the curve, trying not to overload the medic dragons, and of self-isolating to avoid infecting others, both of which are sensible precautions. Not so sensible, or even logical, is her peculiar habit of hoarding toilet paper every time she hears another dragon sneeze.

 

I was naming by lineage, and lo her mom's name was Corona...

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

Hey, not all of my scroll's poetry is that good, either, Tabs. I've seen worse stuff than what you wrote published in a physical book.

 

That seems like the right dragon for that description, Lagie! In the second-to-last sentence you have a list of three things, followed by "both of which". I think you mean "all of which"?

 

Here's my next two prompts:

- A dragon who makes/uses magical devices to effectively replicate some type of modern technology
- A pair of dragons that others get confused with one another.
 

[Lagie]

4 hours ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

Hey, not all of my scroll's poetry is that good, either, Tabs. I've seen worse stuff than what you wrote published in a physical book.

 

That seems like the right dragon for that description, Lagie! In the second-to-last sentence you have a list of three things, followed by "both of which". I think you mean "all of which"?

 

Here's my next two prompts:

- A dragon who makes/uses magical devices to effectively replicate some type of modern technology
- A pair of dragons that others get confused with one another.
 

Nope. Flattening the curve and self-isolating are two things. The one (trying not to overload) that looks like a third is an appendage to the first.

[Dirtytabs]

On 3/31/2020 at 11:24 AM, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

- A pair of dragons that others get confused with one another.

This sounds fun! I should wait for a few dragons to grow up.

 

 

On 3/27/2020 at 9:01 AM, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

- A dragon who aspires to be some other kind of dragon.

 

I started following this prompt, and soon, it became something else. April Fool's description for a script:

Glitzy is actually a girl with white hair, multiple wings, and a red top, or rather, he is one in spirit. He has indescribable dreams of being her. Sometimes, he feels "possessed" by this mysterious lady, and sometimes, he feels he's truly her, maybe a reincarnation. Like him, she is a powerful magic user and very soft and cuddly, if he could say so himself. On some special occasions, this girl comes into being. No one is sure if she's a physical manifestation that has temporarily taken over his body and mind, or if he's just a phenomenal actor wearing a really believable costume.

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

I was about to suggest a prompt based on the April Fool's sprites, but it looks like you've beaten me to it, Tabs!

 

22 hours ago, Lagie said:

Nope. Flattening the curve and self-isolating are two things. The one (trying not to overload) that looks like a third is an appendage to the first.

Ok. Perhaps that would be a little clearer if you used a different wording that didn't have a comma, like "flattening the curve to prevent overloading the medic dragons"?

[Lagie]

56 minutes ago, Kakaru_of_DOOM said:

I was about to suggest a prompt based on the April Fool's sprites, but it looks like you've beaten me to it, Tabs!

 

Ok. Perhaps that would be a little clearer if you used a different wording that didn't have a comma, like "flattening the curve to prevent overloading the medic dragons"?

 

She speaks of things like flattening the curve so as to not overload the medic dragons, and self-isolating to avoid infecting others, both of which are sensible precautions. Not so sensible, or even logical, is her peculiar habit of hoarding toilet paper every time she hears another dragon sneeze.