Corrupt-A-Wish

[MariotheAwesome]

Granted. But you find a pair of socks and take it. Then someone caught you and those socks was an ancient artifact that had been found by your favorite musician and now you are in jail. Also, your favorite musician finds you to be the most disgusting and horrible person on the entire planet.

 

I wish I was famous

[MadameZ]

Hmmm you wish to be famous? Why yes, you are granted that wish, but sadly, you are murdered by a crazy fangirl. Then your fame disappears because yer ded. So much for being famous.

I wish for a cat.

[KarrotKake]

Granted, but the cat claws your face off and eats all your oreos.

I wish to be a floor tile.

 

Edited February 22, 2016 by Unplainifiedcat

[Windra]

Granted, but you are an unused floor tile who watches your floor tile brethren wistfully, wondering what your purpose in life is. You are pointless and unwanted.

 

I wish I never had to sleep!

[MadameZ]

Fine, you do not have to sleep. Oh no! You get so bored that you start taking drugs! Oh no, you're in jail.

I wish for a friendly cat.

[KarrotKake]

Your wish is granted, but your friendly cat has a bald head and is missing two legs. Then it gets stolen because it was too friendly with the neighbors and you never find it until it becomes a viral Internet meme 10 years later, and dies of old age.

 

I wish the number 87 didn't exist.

[Windra]

Granted, but the number 78 does, and exists simply to taunt you.

 

I wish I had a million dollars!

[SoiledLove]

Granted, but someone kills you for the money.

 

I wish Confucius had never existed

[DragonKami]

(Don't you think that got a bit out of hand?)

(Yes, definitely my bad.)

 

 

Granted, but through a chain of events neither does dragon cave.

 

 

 

 

I wish that my dog would be able to come inside.

 

 

[Digital Decay]

Granted. Your dog comes inside and eats your PC [or whatever device you usually go online with.]

 

I wish that song lasted longer than 3:30.

[DragonKami]

Granted, but it lasts an hour and you have to listen to the whole thing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I could fly like a star.

[Digital Decay]

Granted. You can now fly like a star... only that stars don't fly. Just like a star, you're now stuck in the infinite nothingness of the universe, with just a couple of neutrinos for companions. Enjoy!

 

[And that's why physicists shouldn't corrupt wishes.]

 

I wish I didn't have to learn for my upcoming exams.

[DragonKami]

Granted you don't have to learn, because there is no exams and you never get your degree.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish that the sun was white.

[Digital Decay]

Granted. The sun is now white. Which means that it's getting two times as hot as it is now. Um... you kind of look like you're melting.

 

I wish I had a nice cup of coffee.

[DragonKami]

Granted, but the coffee is so hot (for some reason.) that it melts through the cup and becomes a

gas.

 

 

 

 

I wish extraterrestrial creatures visited earth.

[Digital Decay]

Granted. Unfortunately, they aren't sentient creatures but highly infectious bacteria who wipe out humanity.

 

I wish I wasn't so bored.

[SoiledLove]

Granted, you now find EVERYTHING interesting.

 

I wish I woukd stop procrastinating.

[Digital Decay]

Granted. You stop procrastinating, because it's exhausted you so much that you simply fall asleep.

 

I wish I had something to knit.

[DragonKami]

Granted, but that knitting comes to life and takes over the world.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish that the knitting really did come to life.

[Wildmoon]

Granted, but in order to take over the world, it kills you.

 

 

I wish I ruled the world....

[Cloudwing]

Granted, but once you rule the world you are no longer capable of sleeping becuase of all the stress and slowly go insane.

 

 

I wish I had kittens...

[Lovecats]

Granted, but now you have 99 of them and now have to cope with them for the rest of your life.

 

I wish I didn't procrastinate.

Edited February 25, 2016 by lovecats99

[KarrotKake]

Granted, but now you work too much and you are too tired. You keep doing stuff anyway until you die of exhaustion.

 

I wish ferrets didn't poop everywhere.

[Wildmoon]

Granted, but instead, they pee everywhere. EVERY.WHERE.

 

 

I wish my cat didn't snore so loud .-.

 

(also, on my last wish..I was already insane! )

Edited February 25, 2016 by Trickseh

[Cloudwing]

Granted, but now your cat never sleeps and constantly meows at you

 

 

I wish I had more books...

 

(oops, I guess your doubly insane then)