Relationships!

[azaria]

^ Eh, Sea Kitty, me too, don't worry.

 

Being at a fairly isolated girl's school doesn't help. Nor, exactly, does my unwillingness to get smashed at parties every weekend like quite a few people I know (but that's not my scene).

 

It's alright, though. I'm actually quite happy on my own for now. The only properly awkward thing is when my friends have couples night and I'm just like "....guys?"

[Kestra15]

I think my lover pretty much agreed to be my g/f if she moves here. Now we just need to survive that long.

[brairtrainer]

^ Eh, Sea Kitty, me too, don't worry.

 

Being at a fairly isolated girl's school doesn't help. Nor, exactly, does my unwillingness to get smashed at parties every weekend like quite a few people I know (but that's not my scene).

 

It's alright, though. I'm actually quite happy on my own for now. The only properly awkward thing is when my friends have couples night and I'm just like "....guys?"

Azaria have you asked your friends about seeing if there is a guy friend that could be invited to be your 'date' when the couples' nights occur? It may be akward but there have been cases where people have met each other through friends or friends of friends. It could help expand your social circle as well.

[Rachel72]

Relationships can work; just as long as both people are willing... Its not a relationship if only 1 is invested!!

[metalbeak]

So I reeaally need to get this off my chest. This was also posted to my DA but I know no one will really read it and I want to hear other's opinions and advice..

 

So I know I shouldn't talk about this and you dont have to read this if you dont want to. Im not really expecting anybody to, but I need to get this out there and off my chest. I just didn't want to talk to any of my friends or family about this, because even I forgive him, they never will and could cause problems in the future.

 

I should also mention that me and my bf have a long distance relationship and I only really get to see him once a month. Hes been also schedualing over events that me and him have already planned and has been going off and doing other things while we were even together. He once left me alone at his house for nine hours because he felt like he would rather be playing magic the gathering than spending time with his long distant gf.

 

So Ive been dating a guy for about a year and a half now and at first it was amazing. We enjoyed ourselves and it felt like nothing could ever break that. And the thing is, I still do and I still want to be with him, no matter what. But lately, it feels like he cant trust me anymore. I know he has been talking to one of my 'ex'friends. Me and her used to be reeaally close. She was the only person outside my family that I trusted with my life and all my secrets. Until she lied to me and my family and stole from us. It was a huge shock and it still is even though half a year has gone by.

But my Bf still talks to her and tell her about everything him and I do. Specially about stuff that he wont talk to me about. He instead talks to her about it and it really upsets me. I feel really betrayed that he does this and it makes me feel kind of worthless. It makes me feel like im not worth enough to talk our problems together. Why go to her when its our own problem to solve and no one elses business? I feel like it is causing a rift in our relationship. It doesn't help that the words she is saying to my bf is bashing me and a lot of lies.

She has called me selfish, spoiled, disrespectful.. The list goes on.

I will give an example just because this has been bothering me a lot.

He started talking to her about when my truck got towed when I first moved into my apartment. At the time my phone was dead and I didn't have a keyboard to my computer. So obviously I was freaking the out. But I somehow contacted one of my friends and he was able to drive me to the tow place so I could get my truck back. Not only that, but he PAYED for it. Man, I wont forget that act of kindness. I did pay him back obviously. But as another repayment he wanted to come over to my new apartment to have a 'party'. I do that because it was only me and him, and all we did was play super smash bros and I showed him some of my art and he showed me his. That is literally all we did. Nothing else... Well, my bf told my exfriend about that and how he was upset that he came over. How I should have waited till he came up just to have him over. My exfriend proceeded to tell him how I was extremely disrespectful and how I SHOULD have waited for him. I dont know why that was such a big deal. That was literally one of the first times since my exfriend since I ever had a friend over. I figured he would be happy for me since he is always telling me I need a friend that I can hang out with yet he goes as says something like that.

 

My exfriend has just been really pissing me off and has been really upsetting me with what the things she has told my bf and what she has said about me and I just dont know what to do. Why cant he talk to me about this so we can talk it out. Its only going to get worse if he continues to do this. He tells me he wants to be with me and that he actually wants to marry me and the whole shebang. But if he keeps this up I don't think we will last till the next year. But im just so afraid of talking to him about it and im afraid what he will do and say if I do. Because the only way I know this is because I went through his phone.... I know I shouldn't be doing that, and I never used to because I wholeheartedly trusted him, but recently he just seems to be a little more shiftier than usual which prompted my behavior. I feel terrible about it, but something like this shouldn't be overlooked. I just feel like and idiot for thinking that he wouldn't ever go behind my back and betray me....

 

Sorry for the long wall of text, but its been a lot recently and Ive been wanting to talk to someone about this.. And now I feel like Im doing something wrong just by posting this..

[Kestra15]

Relationships can work; just as long as both people are willing... Its not a relationship if only 1 is invested!!

Indeed, it becomes a hell of a slog for that one person when they're the one who puts the effort it. But it does teach many valuable lessons.

[Gsea]

Hey I can actually post in this thread with a slight bit of experience now since I'm in a relationship for the first time whoaa

 

I've been dating a girl for almost a month and I have mixed feelings about it so far. She's been my friend for years (we've known each other since elementary school and have had classes together pretty much since we were 8 years old, up until a couple years ago - we go to different high schools).

 

The pro's:

I like her

 

We know each other really well

 

She's great

 

I'm very comfortable with her (as comfortable as I can be with on-and-off panic/anxiety, but I can tell her anything and I'd be even more comfortable around her in person if she would just relax around me)

 

Attraction and all that stuff

 

I'm ready for a relationship for once

 

The cons:

She's totally in the closet

 

I'm kinda closeted (it's not like it's a secret; I would tell the truth about being pansexual if I were asked, but everyone I know - save a few close friends - assumes that I'm straight, so I don't bring it up unless directly asked, which doesn't happen)

 

We have to arrange meet-ups at the mall and whatnot to see each other in person

 

I have anxiety and while I can build up the perfect casual relationship I want in my head, I get totally stressed out when I have to arrange a date at the mall and go meet her. I'd be much more comfortable just hanging out at my house watching movies, but we've not quite gotten to that point yet.

 

No kissing yet even though she's made it clear she's interested in kissing me. We're both too cripplingly shy and awkward to initiate it.

 

I'm an inexplicably strange person when it comes to intimacy. Kissing, I'm all for it (but I'd rather she initiate it because I just can't). However, I get uncomfortable when she texts me in the morning and says 'Hey beautiful' because...I'm not used to it? I can't explain it, but the 'ideal' moments for me are when we're just laughing and joking and sitting up against each other laughing about dumb videos. I don't like all that gushy crap. I'd rather text her funny pictures than have her call me 'beautiful' and all those pet names ick ick I don't like it but yes put your arms around me and stuff just don't call me beautiful with a emoticon

 

I don't even know if I'm asking for relationship advice or if I just wanted to vent ha

Edited November 27, 2013 by glamoursea2

[edwardelricfreak]

EDIT: (well not I'm reading other posts and wanting to respond )

metalbeak: Do you tell your boyfriend how you feel? It's always important in any relationship to tell a person how you feel, especially from your observations of their behavior. Don't attack them, however; never use "you" statements, where you say "You do/are/did ___". Try to use "I" statements (I feel/think/am). Tell him you feel like the two of you aren't as close, how it hurts to see him go off and leave you alone. You could say that you noticed he talked to your ex-friend a lot and you think she's giving you a bad rap and it could be negatively affecting your relationship even more. Also, a good thing to note, try not to use "always" or "never" when describing their behavior (such as "you always/never do ___"). Always and never are highly selective "absolute" words that are rarely correctly applicable to the real world.

 

-----

 

glamoursea, if you really do want to be in the relationship with her and she does something you don't like, you should probably tell her! She might not know it makes you slightly uncomfortable. If you tell her you're not ready for that yet, she should be understanding enough and respect that and not do it until you're ready. Actually tell her the things you do and don't like. Doing so will REALLY help. I do it with my boyfriend all the time.

 

Also, why can't you go to each others' houses to watch movies and stuff? I mean, I highly doubt people will think "oh they have a relationship ooooooh!~" and will just think you're...friends. Hanging out. I hang out with my female friends all the time! And watching movies and youtube videos is precisely what we do. I'm sure it won't seem weird or anything. And hopefully if you're alone, you can cuddle or something. Usually parents will leave their kids alone when they have friends over. c:

 

I usually think of honesty being the best policy, even if the truth is painful. Because with lies and secrets, you have to keep them up all the time. I definitely think you should try to come out as soon as possible. In fact I encourage it! Unless you live in a small town that absolutely abhors anyone NOT straight, or just your parents do, to where it could legitimately harm you (hopefully you don't, though). I guess don't do it until you really feel ready, but I think sooner is definitely better than later, for both of you. c:

 

-----

 

Ugh I would post about my relationship but I'm just going to say that my boyfriend and I call each other derogatory terms aaaaall the time, in an endearing way. And uh, the daisypath in my signature is how long we've been together. He's my first ever boyfriend. My grandmas were like "you should date more than one guy so you can experiment and find out what you like" and I was like "pfffft I know what I like, the guys at school did NOT impress, and why bother experimenting with things I know won't work?"

Edited November 27, 2013 by edwardelricfreak

[Gsea]

glamoursea, if you really do want to be in the relationship with her and she does something you don't like, you should probably tell her! She might not know it makes you slightly uncomfortable. If you tell her you're not ready for that yet, she should be understanding enough and respect that and not do it until you're ready. Actually tell her the things you do and don't like. Doing so will REALLY help. I do it with my boyfriend all the time.

 

Also, why can't you go to each others' houses to watch movies and stuff? I mean, I highly doubt people will think "oh they have a relationship ooooooh!~" and will just think you're...friends. Hanging out. I hang out with my female friends all the time! And watching movies and youtube videos is precisely what we do. I'm sure it won't seem weird or anything. And hopefully if you're alone, you can cuddle or something. Usually parents will leave their kids alone when they have friends over. c:

 

I usually think of honesty being the best policy, even if the truth is painful. Because with lies and secrets, you have to keep them up all the time. I definitely think you should try to come out as soon as possible. In fact I encourage it! Unless you live in a small town that absolutely abhors anyone NOT straight, or just your parents do, to where it could legitimately harm you (hopefully you don't, though). I guess don't do it until you really feel ready, but I think sooner is definitely better than later, for both of you. c:

 

-----

 

Ugh I would post about my relationship but I'm just going to say that my boyfriend and I call each other derogatory terms aaaaall the time, in an endearing way. And uh, the daisypath in my signature is how long we've been together. He's my first ever boyfriend. My grandmas were like "you should date more than one guy so you can experiment and find out what you like" and I was like "pfffft I know what I like, the guys at school did NOT impress, and why bother experimenting with things I know won't work?"

Ehh, it's not so much that I don't want people/our peers to know about us - I would gladly let all my other friends know, but she is verrry closeted. Only our mutual friend and my best friend know about us. I'm mostly just concerned about my parents finding out or getting suspicious. I think my mom already has suspicions. I have reason to believe that she knows more than she lets on.

 

Buuut the main problem with the casual hanging-out, watching movies, the stuff I want to do, is the fact that we've just seen each other twice since we began dating so there's still a lot of unresolved tension between us. The first date was just really stupid. We wandered around the mall and laughed and drank coffee but we didn't act like a couple because she was really nervous about publicly displaying any sort of affection out of fear that someone she knew would see us. The second time, I went to her house, and we just laid on her bed and talked and watched videos, and there was so much tension because I knew she wanted to kiss and my brain was a frenzied, anxiety-riddled mess so I couldn't get myself together to think 'kiss her!!' and when my mom came to pick me up, I just hugged her and ran out.

 

(Wouldn't it be so much better if I could drive? I could just take myself to her house. Ugh. So many problems would be solved. I'm so late in getting my permit...working on it, though.)

 

We're just both so shy that neither of us want to peek out of our comfort zone.

 

But yes, about the romantic-gushy stuff that gets me uncomfortable: I suppose at some point, discussing it with her will be inevitable. We're still very new at this and we're just bumbling our way through it so far, but I think it'll fall into place since we like each other so much. I don't exactly look forward to telling her, "hey, please don't be all romantic since it's really not like you, and I don't enjoy it to a certain extent" but it will be better if we talk about it.

 

And sooner or later I'll 'come out' I guess. I'm more worried about her coming out; I think her parents are much less supportive of that and she's so much more freaked out about it.

 

---

 

You and your boyfriend sound so cute I totally get the 'endearing derogatory terms' thing - that's how I am with most of my friends, to be honest. It's great that you seem very sure of what you want and that you seem to have more or less found it with him. :3

[edwardelricfreak]

Buuut the main problem with the casual hanging-out, watching movies, the stuff I want to do, is the fact that we've just seen each other twice since we began dating so there's still a lot of unresolved tension between us. The first date was just really stupid. We wandered around the mall and laughed and drank coffee but we didn't act like a couple because she was really nervous about publicly displaying any sort of affection out of fear that someone she knew would see us. The second  time, I went to her house, and we just laid on her bed and talked and watched videos, and there was so much tension because I knew she wanted to kiss and my brain was a frenzied, anxiety-riddled mess so I couldn't get myself together to think 'kiss her!!' and when my mom came to pick me up, I just hugged her and ran out.

 

But yes, about the romantic-gushy stuff that gets me uncomfortable: I suppose at some point, discussing it with her will be inevitable. We're still very new at this and we're just bumbling our way through it so far, but I think it'll fall into place since we like each other so much. I don't exactly look forward to telling her, "hey, please don't be all romantic since it's really not like you, and I don't enjoy it to a certain extent" but it will be better if we talk about it.

 

And sooner or later I'll 'come out' I guess. I'm more worried about her coming out; I think her parents are much less supportive of that and she's so much more freaked out about it.

 

---

 

You and your boyfriend sound so cute I totally get the 'endearing derogatory terms' thing - that's how I am with most of my friends, to be honest. It's great that you seem very sure of what you want and that you seem to have more or less found it with him. :3

Omigosh, I can remember it was before my boyfriend and I started dating, we had confessed to really liking each other and I told him I really wanted to kiss him. And then, the day he asked me out, we were just chillin' at his house and he had kissed my forehead, and I leaned back to kiss his (he was sitting behind me) and then he just kissed me right then! I was so startled. But now it's really easy to kiss him and for him to kiss me. Except for when he blows raspberries in my mouth or when I lick his nose. And at first, I could hardly stand kissing him in front of people! Now I just don't care. You two will probably kiss some day and then not even care anymore.

 

It's even MORE crucial when you're first starting out to go over stuff you like and don't like. It's no fun if one of you is doing something for several MONTHS and then, finally, the other is just like "yeah I've never liked that". You feel so terrible and wonder why they never said anything. D:

 

Also thanks! He's basically also my best friend, which is awesome. When he finally got a car it was SO MUCH EASIER to bond and strengthen our relationship. We Skype call frequently (omg Skype is honestly one of the best applications someone can have. I recommend it to anyone because of the free calling and even video calls. The time is even unlimited, which is awesome). Also, since you like watching videos so much, maybe you should be in a Skype call and use a site like this one to watch youtube stuff in (nearly) the same time. There used to be a much better site but it's been gone for a while. :c That one there is still decent, though.

[CJLambert]

21 and I never had a girlfriend before. I guess its because I'm worried about not having a lot of money and the fact that I am SOO shy in real life.

[Lady_Lunevis]

I just recently entered another relationship--it's wonderful, it really is! ^^

 

He helps me with my anxiety and it's just wonderful to spend time together! Though, a lot of people aren't so happy with it.

 

First things first, we're young. Yes, pretty young. However, we both think of things in a much...older, I suppose the word would be--way than some would, and we're just taking it slow. But there are always the people who criticize having a relationship at such an age, and amongst those are my family and friends.

 

I've learnt to just ignore their comments and keep moving on with my life, but some part of me still has doubts. Maybe he doesn't actually like me back? Maybe he'll break up tomorrow? Maybe this was just all a lie?

 

Love is confusing to me. I'm the shyest, most socially awkward person ever. And the thing is, his best friend asked me out as well. I had to reject him, of course, to be with my current boyfriend, but I'm afraid he'll ask again. If he does, I just won't have the heart to reject him again, and that's going to be kind of awkward.

 

Still, for everyone who's a romantic out there, I shall do the squeal and hide face thing. A new relationship is such a wonderful thing ahh

 

Also, two months on Dec 11. Oh yush c:

 

And to everyone else who's still single--love isn't everything! There are still great people who can just be friends. And one day, the right person will just come walking by. ^^

[edwardelricfreak]

21 and I never had a girlfriend before. I guess its because I'm worried about not having a lot of money and the fact that I am SOO shy in real life.

That isn't necessarily a bad thing, unless you think it is. And money isn't everything, though you are smart to not get involved with another person if you think you're barely surviving, yourself. Don't do something you're not ready for. c:

 

As for the shyness, I was pretty shy myself. There was a guy (who's now my current boyfriend, but I digress) that I wanted to ask out but felt too shy and awkward to do such. It took two of my friends who were conspiring together and doing some "matchmaking" to push me in that direction. They had apparently gone up to him and asked him if there was anyone he really liked, and then had gone to find me and ask me the same, and apparently we had said each others' names at some point! Then they asked if I wanted them to ask him out for me, but of course I said I would do it myself and I sort of eventually did.

 

And if you ask someone and they say no, don't be too disheartened! You can't force anyone to like you, and persistence can be rather creepy. But when you do ask someone out, just do it. Don't try to put on an act or seem overly confident; just be you. If she doesn't like what she sees then that's her loss. c:

 

I just recently entered another relationship--it's wonderful, it really is! ^^

 

He helps me with my anxiety and it's just wonderful to spend time together! Though, a lot of people aren't so happy with it.

 

First things first, we're young. Yes, pretty young. However, we both think of things in a much...older, I suppose the word would be--way than some would, and we're just taking it slow. But there are always the people who criticize having a relationship at such an age, and amongst those are my family and friends.

 

I've learnt to just ignore their comments and keep moving on with my life, but some part of me still has doubts. Maybe he doesn't actually like me back? Maybe he'll break up tomorrow? Maybe this was just all a lie?

 

Love is confusing to me. I'm the shyest, most socially awkward person ever. And the thing is, his best friend asked me out as well. I had to reject him, of course, to be with my current boyfriend, but I'm afraid he'll ask again. If he does, I just won't have the heart to reject him again, and that's going to be kind of awkward.

 

Also, two months on Dec 11. Oh yush c:

 

Yaaay I'm happy for you! c:

 

Oh yes, when you're young it's definitely harder to try to seem like a real deal because no one thinks you're mature or legitimately in love or you don't know what you're doing...don't listen to that. It only lowers your confidence. However, I wouldn't get TOO bold. For me, for instance, I absolutely adore my boyfriend! But for any boyfriend I have, before I were to even consider something super serious like marriage, I'd want to have 1) known them for at least a month, 2) gone out for at least two years, and 3) lived with them, as in, with just them in like an apartment or something, for a couple of months. Also not even gonna marry until I feel ready: I want to be at least 25, be relatively stable financially and with a job, and at least have my own car and apartment/duplex/etc.

 

But anyway!

 

In my experience, when I'm feeling down, I sometimes also get very doubtful of my relationship due to insecurities with myself. I've found that talking about them with my boyfriend often helps. He has to reassure me for a little while, but it's always worked for me. c: I also like to know what his reactions are to hypothetical situations (like "what if someone was hitting on me", "what if I was flirting with someone else", "what if I was having an affair with someone else", etc). It's an interesting exercise, but you have to be careful and reassure the person that they are purely hypothetical and you're just gauging their reactions.

 

As for his friend who also asked you out, I'd say to make it very clear that you are already in a relationship and as it is, you're not looking for another one. If he does keep asking, though, you could try telling your boyfriend (I'm a little iffy on that suggestion, though, as I wouldn't want the two to start hating each other and competing for you). You could also try asking a parent what you could try doing (though I'm not sure how close you are to your parents and asking them about that kind of stuff).

 

YAAAAAY TWO MONTHS. c:

 

Honestly, for me, the first months were the hardest. Since you don't have as much of a bond, it's very easy to consider a break up, ESPECIALLY if you have a silly argument over something trivial. Often times you're not as devoted to each other just yet. That's why communicating what you like and don't like in the relationship is extremely important in the beginning. It saves a lot of heartache and can avoid needless arguments. Also, if you ever are angry or something and are considering a break up, stop and think for a moment, "Do I REALLY want to break up? Or am I just being angry and irrational?" If you realize that you two are just not good together, by all means, break it off. But if it's just from a heated conversation, both of you should back off, calm down a bit, and continue on in a calm and civilized manner. Also constant arguments does NOT necessarily mean the relationship is bad. Arguments can actually be quite useful and powerful tools for helping to solidify a relationship- but only if they're handled correctly. It's very easy to let things get out of hand.

 

 

 

I hope maybe I helped some. c:

Edited December 10, 2013 by edwardelricfreak

[Lady_Lunevis]

Yaaay I'm happy for you! c:

 

Oh yes, when you're young it's definitely harder to try to seem like a real deal because no one thinks you're mature or legitimately in love or you don't know what you're doing...don't listen to that. It only lowers your confidence. However, I wouldn't get TOO bold. For me, for instance, I absolutely adore my boyfriend! But for any boyfriend I have, before I were to even consider something super serious like marriage, I'd want to have 1) known them for at least a month, 2) gone out for at least two years, and 3) lived with them, as in, with just them in like an apartment or something, for a couple of months. Also not even gonna marry until I feel ready: I want to be at least 25, be relatively stable financially and with a job, and at least have my own car and apartment/duplex/etc.

 

But anyway!

 

In my experience, when I'm feeling down, I sometimes also get very doubtful of my relationship due to insecurities with myself. I've found that talking about them with my boyfriend often helps. He has to reassure me for a little while, but it's always worked for me. c: I also like to know what his reactions are to hypothetical situations (like "what if someone was hitting on me", "what if I was flirting with someone else", "what if I was having an affair with someone else", etc). It's an interesting exercise, but you have to be careful and reassure the person that they are purely hypothetical and you're just gauging their reactions.

 

As for his friend who also asked you out, I'd say to make it very clear that you are already in a relationship and as it is, you're not looking for another one. If he does keep asking, though, you could try telling your boyfriend (I'm a little iffy on that suggestion, though, as I wouldn't want the two to start hating each other and competing for you). You could also try asking a parent what you could try doing (though I'm not sure how close you are to your parents and asking them about that kind of stuff).

 

YAAAAAY TWO MONTHS. c:

 

Honestly, for me, the first months were the hardest. Since you don't have as much of a bond, it's very easy to consider a break up, ESPECIALLY if you have a silly argument over something trivial. Often times you're not as devoted to each other just yet. That's why communicating what you like and don't like in the relationship is extremely important in the beginning. It saves a lot of heartache and can avoid needless arguments. Also, if you ever are angry or something and are considering a break up, stop and think for a moment, "Do I REALLY want to break up? Or am I just being angry and irrational?" If you realize that you two are just not good together, by all means, break it off. But if it's just from a heated conversation, both of you should back off, calm down a bit, and continue on in a calm and civilized manner. Also constant arguments does NOT necessarily mean the relationship is bad. Arguments can actually be quite useful and powerful tools for helping to solidify a relationship- but only if they're handled correctly. It's very easy to let things get out of hand.

 

 

 

I hope maybe I helped some. c:

Ahh thank you c:

 

Urgh, yeah, exactly! It seems the younger they are, the more they think they can control your life and your relationships. I'm not saying they can't somewhat, but never completely.

LOLomg nono marriage is completely out of the question I'm not even in university yet! I know what you mean, though. I would never just get married on the spot. I'd need the right circumstance and financial stability and a house and transportation and career and everything! It's good to plan ahead in matters other than love, even if it is important!

 

Hmm...Well, firstly, it's wonderful you and your boyfriend share such a deep understanding of each other, and he's so willing to listen and reassure you ^^ You guys sound amazing together! <3

I honestly don't think that'd work for me, though. He's not exactly very...emotional, I suppose the word is ^^" Though, we'll probably find something that works sooner or later ^^

 

Urgh no my parents like to pretend both me and my bf don't exist they're definitely out of the question

I understand though ^^ I have made it clear to him and I think he's moved on. ^^

 

OH YUSH TWO MONTHS I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT c:

 

Hmm...Well, your advice seems sound! The first few months are hard, yes @__@ But I think I'll be all right!

 

You helped me, at least ^^ Thanks! <3

[edwardelricfreak]

Urgh, yeah, exactly! It seems the younger they are, the more they think they can control your life and your relationships. I'm not saying they can't somewhat, but never completely.

LOLomg nono marriage is completely out of the question I'm not even in university yet! I know what you mean, though. I would never just get married on the spot. I'd need the right circumstance and financial stability and a house and transportation and career and everything! It's good to plan ahead in matters other than love, even if it is important!

I'm just saying not to get too bold because I was always annoyed by couples at my school who were like "We're in love!" but you could TOOOOOOTALLY tell it was only superficial and they'd break up like a week later. >:U

 

And then of course I had some friends who were together for a majority of the schoolyear (fall+spring semester, so only a few months) and then they got ENGAGED. They weren't going to marry right away, and they WERE seniors, buttheygotengaged.

Edited December 10, 2013 by edwardelricfreak

[vivo]

I'm just saying not to get too bold because I was always annoyed by couples at my school who were like "We're in love!" but you could TOOOOOOTALLY tell it was only superficial and they'd break up like a week later. >:U

 

And then of course I had some friends who were together for a majority of the schoolyear (fall+spring semester, so only a few months) and then they got ENGAGED. They weren't going to marry right away, and they WERE seniors, buttheygotengaged.

Talk about rushing things.

 

In the situation I'm in I probably won't get to have my partner around for at least a couple of years. But it doesn't matter. Long distance works for now and we're doing so amazingly well. We'll be meeting for the first time this summer if everything goes well.

[edwardelricfreak]

Long distance can definitely work. For the longest time I barely got to see my boyfriend in person, but we had Skype so we could see each other and talk. We even played games and watched youtube vids together.

 

It's not near as bad as most long distance relationships. Besides, we only live like 45 minutes away. But neither of us had cars so it was basically relegated to the whims of our parents whether we could get together or not!

 

I don't care what anyone says, I think Skype is AMAZING. It's so fantastic what it can do for long distance relationships, even ones that are just family in another state. I love it so much.

 

The only thing that sucks about long distance is that the bond diminishes a little. It doesn't really grow quite as fast as when you're physically with someone. After a while of not seeing my boyfriend and being relegated to only Skype, I get kind of emotional, like usually feeling rundown or constantly feeling angry. And in the beginning, it was really bad because I felt like I didn't have much connection and I wondered why I was with him.

 

Brrr, just thinking about how I felt back then gives me chills. ;^;

[Lady_Lunevis]

I'm just saying not to get too bold because I was always annoyed by couples at my school who were like "We're in love!" but you could TOOOOOOTALLY tell it was only superficial and they'd break up like a week later. >:U

 

And then of course I had some friends who were together for a majority of the schoolyear (fall+spring semester, so only a few months) and then they got ENGAGED. They weren't going to marry right away, and they WERE seniors, buttheygotengaged.

Oh geeze yeah, that's true! I have couples like that at my school as well--one or two months then they call it off, complete with swearing and gossip. It's...interesting.

 

Whaaa, really? Oh geeze, seniors and engaged...I do believe in having true love and wanting to spend the rest of your life with them, but engaged? That's a bit early...I'm surprised their parents let them!

 

Still, whatever they do is their choice. I hope they're happy, haha ^^

 

Talk about rushing things.

 

In the situation I'm in I probably won't get to have my partner around for at least a couple of years. But it doesn't matter. Long distance works for now and we're doing so amazingly well. We'll be meeting for the first time this summer if everything goes well.

 

Well, long distance relationships can work perfectly fine, even if there are some bumps in the road. Good luck! ^^

 

Also, that's wonderful. Seeing the person you like is really amazing, as simple as it is ^^

[StarSea]

Oh boy how to I put this.

Starting when I came to the new middle school and up until just this past year [so past 4 years], there has always been at least one time where some idiot asks me if I'll go out with them, just to be a jerk or for some stupid contest or something like that.

Yes, I get it. Middle school, most kids will probably be idiots about relationships and things like that. However, thanks to that, I don't think I'll ever be sure if someone is serious when they ask me to be their girlfriend. :L

 

And it is more than annoying when my sorta friend tells me I should date so-and-so just because "Oh they have red hair like you!" or there's this one idiot that wouldn't stop touching me the first few weeks of school this year. She found out about it and she's like "omg he likes you! You should go out with him!" lolno e.e

 

There is one guy at school that I know likes me, but no. I'm pretty against him. He was a complete to one of my best friends because she's gay and he's more about pointing out every single flaw of mine and insisting I'm wrong than he is about even acting like he likes me for who I am.

 

 

On the other hand, I have an online friend and I really like him and he says he likes me. He lives quite a ways north of me and I would die to be able to talk to him, but I never use my phone and if I start now, I'm worried mom will find out, have a cow, and take all of my means of contacting him.

[Note She has insisted to me many times that EVERYONE online is someone just out of jail that would love to find and... do 'things' to me as well as she has insisted that EVERYONE is some 30 year old drug addict living in their mother's basement]

Despite me insisting that he shouldn't get me anything for Christmas, he did anyways and sent it to me on Steam. I even tried "But I can't get you anything for Christmas! D:" and he went ahead and got me gifts anyways, and he said that even my existence is enough a gift for him.

 

 

 

I feel like a total dork about relationships so any advice or good/bad about my online friend would be absolutely angelic.

[Syaoransbear]

Oh boy how to I put this.

Starting when I came to the new middle school and up until just this past year [so past 4 years], there has always been at least one time where some idiot asks me if I'll go out with them, just to be a jerk or for some stupid contest or something like that.

Yes, I get it. Middle school, most kids will probably be idiots about relationships and things like that. However, thanks to that, I don't think I'll ever be sure if someone is serious when they ask me to be their girlfriend. :L

 

And it is more than annoying when my sorta friend tells me I should date so-and-so just because "Oh they have red hair like you!" or there's this one idiot that wouldn't stop touching me the first few weeks of school this year. She found out about it and she's like "omg he likes you! You should go out with him!" lolno e.e

 

There is one guy at school that I know likes me, but no. I'm pretty against him. He was a complete to one of my best friends because she's gay and he's more about pointing out every single flaw of mine and insisting I'm wrong than he is about even acting like he likes me for who I am.

 

 

On the other hand, I have an online friend and I really like him and he says he likes me. He lives quite a ways north of me and I would die to be able to talk to him, but I never use my phone and if I start now, I'm worried mom will find out, have a cow, and take all of my means of contacting him.

[Note She has insisted to me many times that EVERYONE online is someone just out of jail that would love to find and... do 'things' to me as well as she has insisted that EVERYONE is some 30 year old drug addict living in their mother's basement]

Despite me insisting that he shouldn't get me anything for Christmas, he did anyways and sent it to me on Steam. I even tried "But I can't get you anything for Christmas! D:" and he went ahead and got me gifts anyways, and he said that even my existence is enough a gift for him.

 

 

 

I feel like a total dork about relationships so any advice or good/bad about my online friend would be absolutely angelic.

How about skype?

[StarSea]

How about skype?

Could possibly end up annoying us; The furnace here is noisy and goes every five seconds and the dogs think it's fun to bark and literally everything. Could probably get some peace at dad's house, but when my sister is over the same weekend that I am, she is kinda.... psycho?

 

Might have to give it a shot?

Edited January 2, 2014 by StarSea

[Kestra15]

I accidentally said 'I love you' to my lover. It's completely true, I do love her (hence why we're lovers, not 'friends with benefits' or other more crass terms), but I didn't want to put stress on her moving here because of me.

[whitebaron]

I accidentally said 'I love you' to my lover. It's completely true, I do love her (hence why we're lovers, not 'friends with benefits' or other more crass terms), but I didn't want to put stress on her moving here because of me.

well, then just tell her that as well, to take the stress away again.

 

its the #1 advice you can give anyone in a relationship or wanting one - go for truth every time, it might hurt sometimes but it always helps.

[S9429183F]

I liked my crush back after more than a year. Last year, I wished him 'Happy Birthday' on Facebook in which he responded to with a 'Thank you'. At that time, he was merely my classmate(not my crush) and we interacted a lot due to our projects. I only found out about his crush on me during our last few weeks as classmates.

 

This April, we ceased being classmates; separated into different classes. We saw each other on campus at times and we waved at each other. Things got awkward during July after he showed up outside the lab during my practical lesson staring and smiling. I was rather shocked by his sudden appearance as I thought that since we were no longer classmates, he would have forgotten about me. I started developing feelings for him after that incident. But our encounters were rather awkward; he stopped smiling at me when he waved to me and I got rather uneasy around him. He still sat outside that lab when I was having lessons.

 

Yesterday, it was his birthday. Unlike last year, I hesitated before posting a Happy Birthday wish on his Facebook wall due to the awkwardness between us. I saw him online a few times on that day but he never responded to my post along with the other FB friends who wished him Happy Birthday. I'm pretty sure he saw my post on his wall... Why isn't he responding to my birthday wish?

 

P.S. He responded to my birthday wish within a hour last year but it has been days and he has yet to respond. IDK if hes ignoring me.-.-"

[Kestra15]

well, then just tell her that as well, to take the stress away again.

 

its the #1 advice you can give anyone in a relationship or wanting one - go for truth every time, it might hurt sometimes but it always helps.

Only if something negative comes of it. After all she said 'I love you too' but thus far neither of us have said any more about it, so it seems all is in order. Besides we pretty much are a couple and already knew we were rather fond of each other, it's just...*sigh* I don't want her move here to be solely be to be with me, if it means she loses out on other life options she'd rather take.