Post Baseless Lies About the Person Above You

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

Corvi put the litter box in the unisex school bathroom and enrolled their cat in the school. This is silly, because their cat is so far behind on its classwork.

[SomeRandomCorviknight]

Sunrise framed me for the loafy uprising

[catstaff]

@SomeRandomCorviknightloads up random strangers' cars with homegrown zucchini in season.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

heh... I read that that actually happens. 

 

catstaff plays mindgames with her hatchlings, invoking love and hate until the dragons are completely dependent on acquiring her approval which she withholds at whim.

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunriseisn't really a cookie artist, they paid someone to decorate the cookies and took all the credit for themself.

 

(I never saw anyone actually open the door of a stranger's car to stick produce inside. But I remember a couple of times as a kid, when our garden was producing more zucchini and tomatoes than we could eat at once, my dad loaded up some boxes with the extras and set them out on a card table by the beach near where we lived, along with a stack of brown paper lunch bags, with a sign that said "The garden's doing too well - help yourself!" The boxes were usually empty within a couple of hours, just in time for the parents to say we needed to go home before we got too badly sunburned.)

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@catstaff doesn't read, because cats are opaque. 

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunriseis secretly training to become a performer at Medieval Times.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@catstaff keeps trying to put destrier tack on me made of old tires.

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunriseis madly in love with the Green Knight.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@catstaff set me up with the Rubber Knight. This is uncomfortably kinky.

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunrisewants to rally all the knights from Medieval Times to make a stand against the orange-faced con man.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@catstaff gave me a bag of cat chow instead of cheddar Chex Mix.

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunrisegave me a bale of hay instead of instant oatmeal packets.

[ShadowMistaken]

@catstaff ate the bale of hay.

[catstaff]

@Shadowsearcherplans to take over the world with an air force of goshawks.

[ShadowMistaken]

@catstaff ate a goshawk ant replaced it with a pigeon lol

 

oopp

meant to say and instead of ant

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@Shadowsearcher also ate a goshawk. We're running out of goshawks. So here's a goose. May the odds ever be in your favor.

 

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunriseprefers the Goose that used to fly with Maverick.

 

Spoiler

 

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

Lies. I never liked Tom Cruise.

 

@catstaff covers all her food in dark red salsa so she can feel lke a successful predator.

 

Edited February 6, 2022 by Long_Before_Sunrise

[catstaff]

Cruise played Maverick, not Goose.

 

@Long_Before_Sunriseis sad that they didn't qualify for pilot training due to having hooves.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

catstaff is a afraid of the refrigerator after it 'ate' so many cat toys.

[catstaff]

@Long_Before_Sunriseactually thinks that the cats I serve play with toys.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

@catstaff knows the exact count of how many hapless spiders her 'exalted leaders' eat each week.

[catstaff]

Yep - zero!

 

@Long_Before_Sunrisewon't share the Girl Scout Cookies.

[Long_Before_Sunrise]

Those were Girl Scouts? You told me they were hobgoblins hiding their true appearance with glamour.