ANSWERED:Gender options

[DarknessAngel]

Despite what is commonly assumed, gender isn't binary. Not everyone is simply 'male' or 'female'; Many people feel as if they are both male and female, or neither, or anything in between. There are dozens of other gender identities.

 

At the moment, the three gender options a user can choose to display on their profile here are "male", "female", and "not telling." Any user who does not identify with just male or female is either forced to pick one (which can be extremely stressful), or be stuck with 'not telling.' But what if they would like people to know their gender identities?

 

My proposal is this: In addition to the three options currently available, add "both", "neither", and "other." This would allow more people to comfortable share their gender with their fellow users just like everybody else.

 

Something else to consider is to not include the gender icon on a user's profile and posts for 'neither' and 'other' (the same way it would not be shown for 'not telling'), but possibly using this for those who select 'both' :

 

I just think that making these slight changes may help many people on here feel a little bit more comfortable with expressing who they are.

Edited July 12, 2014 by DarknessAngel

[olympe]

Even though I'm not personally affected, I don't see the harm in implementing this - but some people might actually benefit from it. The question is whether the forum software allows for more gender options.

 

Anyway, I'm in favor of adding more gender options.

[Plaguefly]

+Support

 

I'm a non-binary individual myself and while I settle with picking one I would feel so much better overall being able to choose neither!

[DarknessAngel]

I believe most forum software allows you (meaning the creator) to add any gender options you like, but I could be wrong on that.

[vivo]

I don't think TJ has power over the forum system. Even so I can't see why ''neither'' would be a non-acceptable displaying manner.

[KageSora]

I'd like that, if possible, though I understand if the forum software has something that stops it.

 

I'd love a genderfluid option myself, haha.

[Cavedragon49990]

Even if this isn't possible, I would still support it; I'm bigender myself and it's rather annoying to have people refer to me as a girl because that used to be what my profile was set to.

 

I'm not sure if the forums would permit more gender options, though.

[Guillotine]

IIRC there are some free-use hacks that allow for extra gender options for this forum software, but I haven't looked too hard for Invision stuff, since I primarily work with Jcink or Proboards.

[ThatCoolOfAChick]

I would love to see this, i've had slight problems with myself in identification myself in the past, so i identify differently for different situations, but not everyone can do that, so i would love to see that this would take the weight of of so many people's shoulders.

[xeyla]

I support this as well. I know there is not just Male/Female/Both genders, and would want members to be able to show how they identify. I see no harm in adding more options.

[jumpsnake]

+ 1 support from me as well, even though I identify as female, I want everyone to feel happy, comfortable and accepted here in our dragonish community!

[HeatherMarie]

Completely 100% support.

[Cinnamin Draconna]

100% Support

 

As someone who identifies as bi, I fully support any and all options for true gender identity.

[whitebaron]

I see the following additional problem with adding more options, besides the obvious (IPB does not support this before Version 3):

 

we would need symbols to display it as well, good luck with getting a consensus on that.

 

[DarknessAngel]

The option "not telling" currently does not have a symbol, so I don't see an issue with not having symbols for every option. It would be wonderful if there was a designed and agreed upon symbol for each, but I don't think it's necessarily required in order to put the options in place.

[cyradis4]

I personally would prefer to see the forums go genderless.

 

There are a whole host of definitions for gender orientation, and that list is expanding at a geometric rate, it seems. TJ would have to be adding new definitions every week, and for most only a couple of people would use them, and I think there are much better uses of his time.

 

I can sympathize with those who want to express their gender, but this is a forum for a dragon collecting game and I feel that that's where we need to focus: on collecting dragons, and leave gender identification out of it. All gender identification, including the standard male / female. That way, no one feels left out.

 

Cheers!

C4.

[purplehaze]

I kind of have to agree with C4 on this. I do like to see genders on the forum, but only so I know whether to call someone he or she when referring to them. The somewhat more awkward s/he will do if gender isn't identified. Your gender identification really has nothing to do with this forum, except possibly in some GD discussions. You could always add your gender identification to your profile if you feel it is important.

[Fuzzbucket]

I personally would prefer to see the forums go genderless.

 

There are a whole host of definitions for gender orientation, and that list is expanding at a geometric rate, it seems. TJ would have to be adding new definitions every week, and for most only a couple of people would use them, and I think there are much better uses of his time.

 

I can sympathize with those who want to express their gender, but this is a forum for a dragon collecting game and I feel that that's where we need to focus: on collecting dragons, and leave gender identification out of it. All gender identification, including the standard male / female. That way, no one feels left out.

 

Cheers!

C4.

Yeah kjnda. I don't care what gender I am talking to here; who you want to share your life with has nothing to do with your trades or your breeding patterns (well, you know what I mean !) I can't remember why I put my gender in, but I might take it out now that this has come up - because it is SO irrelevant here....

[Mondat]

I personally do not care - letting other people know your gender identity just reminds me of the hip Tumblr teens where you can read "17, transgender, pansexual and different" in their blog descriptions even before you really know what stuff they post. And I am like "oh you're so speshul".

 

I do not care about gender or what happens "where magic happens" and with who - hey, as long as all people involved want it, have fun! - and I do not care about showing off my gender identity - it's overrated, in my opinion. These online days it seems to me you have to express everything you can on the internet and I feel I am too old for it already.

 

The only place where I care about such things is when I meet a person in real life and then I ask how they would like to be called and then I am more interested to see if the person is nice or not.

It really doesn't matter much on this forum, to me. Man/Woman/Genderqueer, why should I care? You're a human, you have a scroll and I want to trade dragons with you. If you want to let everybody know who they're dealing with...put something into your signature.

 

(I don't mean to offend anyone with my writing, I just put it bluntly)

[KageSora]

I personally do not care - letting other people know your gender identity just reminds me of the hip Tumblr teens where you can read "17, transgender, pansexual and different" in their blog descriptions even before you really know what stuff they post. And I am like "oh you're so speshul".

Honestly, a lot of people I know do that because online is the only place they can get any chance of recognition of their actual identity. For many people it's not about being "speshul" it's about finding a place that will actually acknowledge that gay/straight/lesbian (and sometimes bisexual) aren't the only sexualities that exist and that being cisgender isn't the only gender identity possible.

 

Some of them do just jump on the "bandwagon" and want to be special (since they don't grasp all the problems that can come with being open about your sexuality or gender identity), but for a large number of people it's simply because, honestly, we're sick of being erased, being told we don't exist and that it's just a phase or that we need to get help because we're sick or broken. You can find more on that in the gender identities and sexual orientation threads, though, so I'll leave it at that since I don't want to completely derail this.

 

 

I can understand if the forum software has limitations--that's just a thing that's not necessarily something that can be worked around, it's not intentionally not allowing people to have an accurate identity label but an actual technical limitation.

 

But the idea of "oh stop trying to be so speshul" or "no too many identities too confusing" are excuses many people use to intentionally misgender people or to continue believing male/female are the only genders that exist and sometimes that transgender isn't even a thing. And I don't think those should be considered as actual arguments against potentially adding additional gender options.

 

But, if there's a possibility of adding additional options--even just listing them without a symbol since not all symbols are agreed upon like the standard male/female ones)--I'd like that a lot since it could help some people who are frustrated at basically everywhere lacking proper options to express gender.

[olympe]

I personally do not care - letting other people know your gender identity just reminds me of the hip Tumblr teens where you can read "17, transgender, pansexual and different" in their blog descriptions even before you really know what stuff they post. And I am like "oh you're so speshul".

Feeling left out and alienated isn't about being special. Personally, I have two conditions that make my life rather difficult - even though neither is related to my gender or my sexuality. However, I know perfectly well what it means to be "different". There's absolutely nothing glorious about it. It sure doesn't make me feel special. Not at all. Quite the contrary.

[Mondat]

Honestly, a lot of people I know do that because online is the only place they can get any chance of recognition of their actual identity.  For many people it's not about being "speshul" it's about finding a place that will actually acknowledge that gay/straight/lesbian (and sometimes bisexual) aren't the only sexualities that exist and that being cisgender isn't the only gender identity possible.

 

Some of them do just jump on the "bandwagon" and want to be special (since they don't grasp all the problems that can come with being open about your sexuality or gender identity), but for a large number of people it's simply because, honestly, we're sick of being erased, being told we don't exist and that it's just a phase or that we need to get help because we're sick or broken.  You can find more on that in the gender identities and sexual orientation threads, though, so I'll leave it at that since I don't want to completely derail this.

Just wanted to say/add that I know very well about the problems with being open about sexuality and/or gender identity, before I have hundreds of people replying to me.

I personally still do not see any need to "show it off" myself because the most important person who needs to know is me. I'm "Mondat" and that's what people need to know, not what "gender" I am.

I know who I am and what I like and my partner(s) knew/know too. I'm more the "doing whatever I like instead of clarifying myself online" type, I guess

[octopi]

Some people feel like their genders are a central part to their identity. Just because you don't doesn't mean they shouldn't have the choice for this. Surprise, that's why it's called your "personal" opinion, it doesn't apply to the rest of us!

 

And I did a bit of googling - apparently most of the profile fields like MSN and email are custom put in by the webmasters, so this should definitely be possible.

Edited July 15, 2014 by Fractional Pi Day

[TJ09]

Keep in mind, the forums are running software that, at this point, is over 11 years old.

 

As I've stated in the past, I don't consider making modifications to the forums to be a valuable use of time. If (or, hopefully: when) the forum software gets upgraded in the future, feel free to bring this up again.