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Kakaru_of_DOOM

Verseweavers Lineage

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Ever aspired to dabble in rhyme?

Drop in with Verseweavers any old time!

Welcome, and join us - please pick up a quill,

Don’t worry if you haven’t mastered the skill

Our writers will help you to polish your verse

And if you have stage-fright, we’ll help you rehearse.

 

Welcome to the Verseweavers Lineage!

 

It is a little-known fact that poems are an acceptable form of description, so long as they follow the description guidelines. The main purpose of this lineage is to spread this knowledge, and encourage the bards of Valkemare to write!

 

If you want a poem-dragon but cannot commit to this project, just grab one of your dragons and write! It won’t be part of this directly, but it will help fulfill this bloodline’s goal.

 

1. rules-----2. poetry and the description guidelines------3. member dragons

 

 

1. The rules are simple:

- All dragons descended from Fnekc and Thriqui must be described in verse.

- All mates of dragons descended from Fnekc and Thriqui must be described in verse; they are as much a part of the lineage as the direct descendants. They should be probably be CB, however there are certain exceptions:

- If aforementioned mates are non-CB, their parents must also get descriptions in verse; all these parents’ parents and offspring must be described in verse (including half-siblings, etc.) and so forth It spreads to every individual that can be found by ‘view lineage’ and/or ‘view offspring’. Do not create a lineage where other individuals are displayed as higher-gen than Thriqui and Fnekc. If this doesn’t make sense to you, use only CB mates as this makes things easier to understand. If you want to use this exception, please PM me to make sure you understand.

- Names: please do. Dragons (including those who married in) have the suffix “Verseweaver”.

 

For this lineage, freezing follows the rules of flavour-text used on my (Kakaru_of_DOOM) scroll for all ‘frozen’ hatchlings: instead of being prevented from aging by a spell, it is Peter Pan Syndrome (PPS) : a recessive genetic condition that, when expressed, causes early activation of the biological process that prevents a dragon from becoming physically old once they hit maturity, arresting their growth at a young age. This does not effect their intellectual nor magical development, but as prepubescents they will never develop an interest in mates. Of course, being in a medieval setting, there is no understanding of genetics; simply families that have one PPS individual tend to be more likely to have others and inbred individuals have a particularly high chance of developing it.

‘Freezing’ a PPS individual is okay so long as whoever breeds the egg is okay with it.

 

Biting is not recommended unless you are somehow 100% certain the egg will not be repelled into the AP and lost; even then the bitten/bitten by ‘lineage’ must be in verse all the way up and sideways.

 

--------------------------

 

2. Poetry and the Description Guidelines.

 

Due to the nature of descriptions, not everything that flies as a poem will be acceptable as a description. The one place that may be confusing for some is “Proofread”: what does ‘appropriate grammar’ mean in terms of a poem? First of all, they need to make sense - some amount of aberrant word order is allowed, so long as the meaning of the lines are not lost. Second, there usually needs to be something that defines a poem as more than just sentences that have been chopped up into lines. Here is my general guide for this, the rules I use to make sure my poems are clearly poetic:

 

- Rhyme - is when words have the same end sounds (i.e. cat, hat). It is the easiest and most obvious way to make a poem a poem. You can find rhyming dictionaries online or in library/bookstores, they are very helpful.

- Meter – is where the stressed and unstressed syllables form a pattern. It should be easy to find the stress pattern of a word, just say it out loud.

- Acrostics – is when the letters of the first line spell something - when it is written about an individual, it is often that individual’s name. This can be used in connection with any/all other techniques.

- Formal Verse - is when a poem follows the established rules of a fixed form of poetry – a sonnet or rondeau, for example. With the exception of the sestina, these have rhyme; some also specify meter. There are many websites and books of poetry forms.

- Good forms for the beginner include ballads, quatrinas and terza rima.

- Other more advanced forms include are ballades, lais, and kyrielles.

- If you can’t get enough of refrains, try the pantoun.

 

There are a few forms I do not recommend.

haiku: I tried this and got a moderator reject for it being too short to describe the dragon. If you wanted, you could do a haiku chain, though – a string of haiku.

chant royall; double ballades; double sestinas, etc. While these are perfectly good forms, they are also long enough that it is impossible to do with a 1000-character limit. In fact, even a single sestina is iffy. If you do one I applaud you, but for description stick with something that fits!

 

Tips for good poetry!

To make a stanza break in a description, you must put a placeholder (usually a period (.)) or the auto-format will delete the empty line.

 

Avoid over-common rhymes – such as ‘love’ ‘above’ and ‘dove’, or ‘fish’ ‘dish’ and ‘wish’. Those who read a lot have heard them enough that they are no longer enjoyable.

 

When rhyming with words that have a suffix (such as –ing words), that syllable doesn’t count. For example, ‘frolicking’ would single-rhyme with ‘panicking’, but would not rhyme with fishing even though technically it is a double-rhyme.

 

Critique: how I run it.

Not everyone is at the same writing level. I want to be able both to encourage those who are just starting out and help experienced poets who want to polish their verse. Giving a first-time writer the same critique as a high-aspiring versifier isn't particularly encouraging, so here is a little explanation/guide for how I interpret different wordings in order to give an appropriate response:

- If all you ask generally about 'how does this look' or similar wording, I will give a less-intense overview - spelling and a general does-it-fit-the-guidelines approach.

- If you specifically say you have a problem with some part, or ask for a critique/feedback, I will go more in-depth and am likely to scrutinize the structure.

Remember that my opinion is no more than an opinion, and if you disagree with my suggestions you don't have to follow them. Others invariably have different opinions.

If someone asks for help that you think you can give, feel free to jump in.

 

Helpful links - There are a few places I look for help with writing. I have no connection to the following sites.

Rhymer.com - This is an online rhyming dictionary. If you can't remember what rhymes with anything, this is a good place for help. It has problems with certain syllables, though, so use your own judgement.

Vole Central - This site has good descriptions of a large number of forms as well as a extensive glossary of poetic forms. WARNING: The example poems for the Rondel and zejel (the latter is the same page as utendi/utenzi) are somewhat mature. If that's not your thing, there are plenty of other forms.

Edited by Kakaru_of_DOOM

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3. member dragons and breeding pairs

 

Before breeding, a pair must have their descriptions visible at least at the ‘pending’ level. Here are the forms for doing stuff! Just copy them into your post and replace the bracketed thins with the appropriate information, and viola.

 

“Straight-run” means that eggs will be given as they are laid; with no sorting for breed, gender, etc. Alternatively, a breeder may offer to sort the eggs they give out – either by breed and or gender (via influence/precognition).

 

[color=blue]New breeder form!
Username: {scroll name + link}
Contact: {post on form / PM / other}
Breeder type: {straight-run/sorted}
Breeding pair(s): {put links to the dragons as well as their names}[/color]

 

[color=olive]Update breeder form!
Username:
Update: {what you’re updating - add/remove breeding pair(s), change breeding style, etc.}[/color]

 

[color=red]Request egg form!
Username: {scroll name + link}
Egg request: {specify breeder, breeding pair, breed (if applicable) or any.}[/color]

- > When you recieve an egg, edit your request to strike it out. If you don't know how:

[s] whatever wou want stuck out [/s]

I reccomend you just type the code in, it's not that hard.

 

[color=purple]Ascociate group form![/color]
Username: {scroll name + link}
group url:
Additional comment/info (if applicable):

(For explanation, see sub-header 4 at the bottom of this post)

 

Kakaru_of_DOOM – straight-run – post on form

Thriqui x Fnekc – CB – blusang x sapphire

Aseje x Vithruse –2nd gen sapphire x red-finned tidal

Jirias x Azurite – witchlight x 2nd gen sapphire

 

Currently single individuals:

[currently none]

 

Pending (descriptions may not be visible):

Habdi - Zeditha's sapphire x Aodr - pyralspite (spessartine)

Stanza - Kakaru_of_DOOM's frozen sapphire

 

And of course, banners!

user posted image - by Kakaru_of_DOOM

[img=http://orig14.deviantart.net/039b/f/2016/316/d/6/verseweaver_splashpng_by_niharia-dao6xef.png]

 

user posted image - art and rhyme by Kakaru_of_DOOM

[img=http://orig13.deviantart.net/306b/f/2017/065/6/7/dragon_posey_couplet_by_niharia-db1g6xz.png]

 

4. Associate Groups.

 

With the introduction of groups, I have decided to display what I will call 'associate groups'. Because my goal here is to promote verse, here is where I will display dragons that are not part of the Verseweavers line, but nonetheless have poetic descriptions. The rule is simple: put together a group that contains the poem- or hybrid- description dragon(s) you wish to share, and submit it through the appropriate form. (By 'hybrid' I mean 'contains both verse and prose'.) There should be no pure-prose descriptions in the verse group. In theory I could list them out normally, but that would take up waaay too much space. On my own I have 100+ o.0

 

Associate Groups:

Kakaru_of_DOOM

 

 

Alright, let's get rhyming!

Edited by Kakaru_of_DOOM

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Request egg form!

Username: Zeditha

Egg request: Any!

 

This seems like an awesome idea!

I'm just going to point out that Jirias is a Witchlight and not a Magelight; Magelight is a Pygmy breed XP

 

I plan to write in Shakespearean Sonnet form. :3

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You're right, I did mistype Jirias's breed. I fixed it.

 

Then I tried to breed both pairs and got nothing. Oh well, I'll try again next week.

 

---------------------------

 

Just editing on that yes, I've now sent the egg and it has been received; I don't want to double-post. I do not have any confirmation that the dragon has been properly transferred, I'm waiting for the pending description to appear. A PMed confirmation that the poem has been written would be nice too; perhaps I should retcon that into the rules. Hmmm...

Edited by Kakaru_of_DOOM

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Bump.

 

I suppose my attempt to avoid double-posting was inevitably not helpful. I knew this wouldn't be infinitely popular, but...

 

I've added on a introductory poem to the first post, as well as some links to poetry resources. I also scrapped the 'names not 100% necessary' clause - I had included it for the possibly yet unlikely case that an awesome code would be laid into the lineage, but then I realized: with the surename, "(code) Verseweaver" wouldn't be taken, even if the code alone is.

 

 

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its a very pretty idea, sadly i cannot help myself at the moment (way too many projects) maybe later.

 

Its also a very difficult idea, it will require much patience on your part.

 

Get it started with your own dragons, have the lineage going on your own scroll and when the proof will bring more people.

 

Also know there will be dead times, times when no one works on it for months at a time, its not an insult, everyone has many projects they are working on, you are the beating heart of this lineage.

Edited by Zerhai

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I have successfully written a shakespearean sonnet for Habdi Verseweaver.

 

Habdi Verseweaver is of noble birth;

And she has the sweet gleam of royalty,

But hatchlings used to mock her for her girth,

As she gorged often on fruits' luxury.

 

Such mocking made the poor hatchling decline,

As she could not stop snacking on the sweets.

But soon she learned to play in the sunshine,

And she soon became shiny and sleek.

 

True love has not yet this young dragon found,

Nor any mate to take her time away,

But oft she wanders, bird-like in her sound

To seek one who will always with her play.

 

This youthful Weaver wanders far and wide

For a dragon who will take her in his stride.

 

I have put it into her description box; hopefully it will begin to show up before too long!

 

I am now in the process of deciding on a mate for this dragon. I think a thoughtful dragon would suit her well; her mate would be quiet and thoughtful, but appreciative and loving, and still willing to play...

 

What breed of dragon would suit that? I'm thinking perhaps Moonstone... but I only have one, and he's bred with a Shimmerscale (who is obviously not CB). Not that it'd be too hard to find another. xd.png

 

Would a Snow dragon be suited to the role? Neither of my Snow dragons are named or described or mated yet, so they're available... I'm having trouble thinking of suitable dragons here.

 

Anyway, I'll see what I can do for a description. Obviously it has to be a sonnet to match Habdi's, and I'm putting down ideas while I have them. xd.png

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I thought I had responded here already, but then I realized I hadn't. Sorry about that.

 

Zeditha: I like it. The one part that I'm a little iffy on is the use of the word 'born' - I personally find it makes me think of live birth, which is something dragons don't do, but I understand that my opinion is in the minority. Your description looks fine.

 

 

Zerhai: How much effort do you think should I focus into this? I mean, I have plenty of non-Verseweavers drakes, dragons, and pygmies on my scroll. Should I display some of them here (perhaps as 'associate dragons')? And/or should I do out of my way to breed the official bloodline?

 

Actually, this second question is open-ended. Does anyone have suggestions?

Edited by Kakaru_of_DOOM

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Bump!

 

I'm working on a poem to give to Aodr, who I have renamed with the Verseweaver name. smile.gif

 

I'm wondering whether I should edit Habdi's description to include something about Aodr, since his poem is featuring her?

If I feel like it, I'll write something up wink.gif

 

In answer to the question; I'd suggest making a Pygmy offshoot to the lineage, perhaps?

Breeding more of your lovely dragons and gifting them to people might be a nice way to expand the lineage - or simply advertise it and allow others to join as they will smile.gif

 

Edit - I'm just going to point out that 'Verseweaver' is misspelled in both of Habdi's parents' names. xd.png

Fnekc Verseaver - missing the 'we' at the start of 'weaver'

Thriqui Vereweaver - missing the 's' in 'verse'.

 

If one of those is actually meant to be the correct spelling, I'll change both of my Verseweavers' names. I just thought I should let you know, since I spotted it. tongue.gif

Edited by Zeditha

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KoD I love the project and might have to consider joining in. Do the other people in Descrip Force and other members know about this yet? Cuz it sounds like something we'd all love to do !

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Thanks for catching my typos, Zeditha. My ability to spell is impressively dubious, given the amount of writing I do.

 

On the topic of pygmies, it appears I'll have to catch some if I want to start a pygmy-based parallel - it appears that the two CB poem-described pygmies I have are... well, let's just say that Ky the Knight is probably not the individual anyone would want heading off a serious lineage.

 

As for the Description Force, I'm not sure a good way to approach it. Perhaps I should go to descripdoom and see if anyone is on?

 

...Perhaps it would help to make a signature banner that more closely reflects what this lineage is about. Something like user posted image?

 

[img=http://orig13.deviantart.net/306b/f/2017/065/6/7/dragon_posey_couplet_by_niharia-db1g6xz.png]

 

...It might be too dippy, though. I feel like 'cavort' is kind of a lame word choice on my part. I'll go add that banner - and Aodr - to the appropriate lists.

Edited by Kakaru_of_DOOM

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I finished Aodr's poem:

 

 

A mellow dragon is this Aodr,

And oft he prances through the cliffside sea.

But one day he heard something, someone - her;

The elegant song of a young Habdi.

 

So enamoured was he with her song

He flew atop the cliff despite the spray,

And followed, searching for her, all day long,

As she moved further down the hills to play.

 

Habdi's sweet tones were soon accompanied

By his soft counterpoint of baritone.

Far off did others hear the melodies,

And hum in dreams or sink to sleep like stone.

 

The two young dragons weave themselves a net

To snare hearts with their beautiful duet.

 

I should probably edit Habdi's poem, since it states that she hasn't yet found a mate, and now she has. wink.gif

I'll work on it xd.png Suggestions and help (and crits) are welcome!

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Since you've asked for a critique, here it is:

Looking at your poem for Aodr (and this applies to Habbi too a little), I notice you are doing quite a bit of word inversion - where you change the order of words to fit the structure of the poem. It's definitely a stylistic thing, but I bring it up because it's helpful to consciously know what you're doing and the feel it gives to readers.

 

Structurally, you are pretty good with an accentual meter with four stressed syllables ("downbeats") per line. However, the first line only has three downbeats; and lines 11-13 are in iambic (the "da-DUM" stress pattern) pentameter. For the first line, I recommend you tweak it (and the second line for grammar) into:

The mellow sesspartine named Aodr

Often prances through the cliffside sea

Or something similar.

The second part is slightly more complicated, as there are two obvious way to tweak it. You could tweak those three lines to put the entire poem into four-beat accentual, or since this is a sonnet, you could channel the Italian variant and emphasize the change between the first eight lines and the last six by making lines 9-10 and 14 into five iambs (da-DUM) each. Whichever option you pick, it would probably be a good idea to clarify the intentions behind their actions - the phrase "snaring hearts" makes me think of a manipulating mastermind, which I doubt is what you're aiming for. "winning hearts" might be a better phrase; it even has the same stress pattern.

 

That being said, it's a really good start. With just a little bit of polish, it will be beautiful.

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Bump.

 

I haven't heard back from Zeditha. I really hope I haven't offended her. Nonetheless, I've added a few things that might be exciting!

 

- Associate Groups

- An explanation for how I approach critiques (hopefully to avoid offense)

- an 'easter egg' link hidden somewhere in the initial posts.

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