Little lost dragon and I

[Ryujin13]

"We do not use sleeping aids such as the ones you described, but I know there are a few plants with the properties you seek." Gentle Breeze said before turning to one of the nearby guards a swaying something in their language.

It took about five minutes for the guard to return, but when he did there was a fine white powder in his hands which he gave to Gentle Breeze.

This she took and poured into a leaf shaped like a bowl that contained water. A few stirs with her fingertip and the water glowed a soothing, pale pink.

Gentle handed the bowl to the guard who approached Fren and carefully handed the bowl off.

 

Alina had eaten a bit of the food offered to her by Fren, but still wasn't reacting to much and certainly wasn't talking. Still she seemed to trust Fren still so drank the water without question.

Within a minute she was asleep, her soft snores mingling with the surrounding nightlife.

 

"Beds can be found by the stream." Gentle Breeze said, gesturing to a spot where plants were already sprouting and creating beds for the group, pillows and blankets all made from a fluffy white plant that looked more like fabric then anything. "I will remind you that leaving this clearing would e most unwise. There are things out there that will attempt to lure or scare you out, but so long as you remain here there is no danger. There will be no guards to keep you from leaving however, so if you do leave it is on your own head." Gentle Breeze explained, not in a threatening manner, just a factual one. She obviously didn't want to see this happen to the group, but if it did she wanted them to be absolutely warned against what would happen.

Without a further word except for 'good night' Gentle and all the others turned and left, seeming to disappear the moment they exited the clearing.

The moment the group stood from the table it and everything on it seemed to melt down and into the ground becoming one with the earth again.

 

Avira walked over to her bed, the bone from the meat she had consumed safely stowed in one of her pockets for later. She was still on the verge of tears, but she quickly stripped to her t-shirt and a pair of loose athletic shorts that came with her backpack.

Varren's weapon was placed safely at hand, and as she lay down she closed her eyes and continued to think, her thoughts on what had been said keeping her from sleep for over an hour before she finally managed to pass into the world of dreams, which, unlike the normal bad ones, were instead populated by good ones that included her team, all of them having a good time doing something stupid and pointless that still entertained them all.

It was this that she dreamed about and nothing stirred her the rest of the night.

[little lost dragon]

Fren nodded as Gentle Breeze spoke about not using sleeping aids but used some plants with the properties that did the same thing. Which was good she did not want Alina to have a seditive that was stuffed with human chemicals just for the humans who made it can get a few extra bucks off it.

When the guard came back and then eventually came over to her she gently took the leaf bowl and gently helped Alina drink some. Shortly afterwards the young one was asleep and from the lack of twitching and such, peacefully, which Fren could not help but smile a bit.

She nodded when Gentle gave them a good night before she finished her meal eating all of it before getting up with Avira and went to the beds. She slowly got in her tail flowing out from under the odd plant like covers and she gently placed Alina's sleeping form between her breasts to support the little one but keep her close before going to sleep. For once the nightmares gone for now. Perhaps the nightmares where a castle induced thing.

 

Vita joined them at the beds but just seemed to go inactive but his sensors constantly scanning all around him as he kept an eye on everything.

[Ryujin13]

During the night there were indeed sights and sounds around the clearing, not loud or even well formed, but will there nonetheless. Some showed friends or family, Varren, Kara, and Jak being favorites, all beckoning for the viewer to come with them. Sometimes there were whispers that promised to take them home or bring them to their friends and any other number of things.

Avira for her part only woke up once, and almost climbed out of bed and ran to the edge of the forest when she saw her team, standing at the edge and calling for her. They were all smiling their fox smiles and calling for her to join them, telling her everything she wanted to hear. It was only through a force of will that Avira closed her eyes, covered her ears and laid back down, tears flowing again as she fell into dreams of her friends and how much she missed them.

 

Morning crested late on the planet they were on compared to the castle, and it was about ten by the groups standards when Gentle Breeze and Weathered Stone returned.

The table was regrown and food placed on it the same as the night before. Cuts of meat were given to Avira and Fren, and more fruits and nuts were placed on the table as well.

This time a number of the people joined them, allowing the group their first good look at them.

Unlike a normal species this one was as varied as the plants in the world. Some were like Shifting Leaves, tall humanoids with roots growing off of them and down to their feet, leaves growing from the branches that covered them. Others were thin like vines, still others looked like trees. The variations seemed endless except for the general rule that they all looked like plants of one kind or another. That being said they could be generally categorized into two classes, humanoids and plants. The humanoids all shared the two leg, two arm construction even of their bodies were different. Still it seemed like female was the dominant force present, with maybe one male for every three to four females. The plants however were truly different with no real pattern at all. They too generally had two arms, but beyond that anything seemed open. Some slithered, some walked, some seemed to float on air. There was no sense or reason behind it or so it seemed.

"You are all still here, that's good." Gentle Breeze said with a small smile as she ate a fruit. "Tell me what your plans are now. Have you reconsidered my offer? As long as you can find the garden it remains open. You may stay here among the trees and the wilderness. You can know peace at last and learn the ways of the world as they are supposed to be taught."

"Varren wanted me to shut down the castle, so that's what I'm going to do." Avira said after a small pause, shaking her head as she spoke. "It would be an insult to his memory if we just gave up."

 

Alina had slept well the night before, and seemed a bit more alert to her surroundings, but still wasn't talking. Instead she just sat and ate what was offered to her. When Varren was mentioned though she shivered and she seemed to go blank as she retreated to the place where there wasn't any thought, where she wouldn't have to think about the fact that Varren was dead.

Gentle Breeze watched Alina during these moments, a thoughtful look on her face as she saw the hatchling disappear inside herself yet again.

"We will be having a growth session an hour or two from now." Gentle said quietly to Fren. "I think your daughter would benefit."

[little lost dragon]

For one like Fren the bekoning voices played havoc with her mind logic, but no real pull was there, when she heard Jak however she woke up and looked in what seemed to be his direction. But...... her chemical radar told her he was not there, no one was there beyond Avira and Vita as well as Alina. She frowned and closed her eye's again the effect largely ineffective thanks to her other ways of telling whats real and what's not.

 

When morning came to she woke up. She looked at Alina as the hatchling slept a little longer. She gently scooped the young one up in her hands and got up. Vita seemed to detect this and started moving again "Predator illusions where detected. however no danger to the group was detected." he reported and Fren nodded. She went over to the table that was regown along with the food present. Gentle Breeze and Weathered Stone along with a number of others showed up. All the eye's on her made her a bit.... uncomfterble, her line of work normally met that many eye's on you met death soon.

She got a good look at them too and what she saw puzzled her. There where some..... humanoids but at the same time there others who had 2 arms and the similarity's ended there. Why did it look like there may of been humans but the humans might of reproduced with the plant race? However would the human ones be explained?

She looked at Gentle Breeze as she spoke and nodded "I can't leave my allies, but I also need to do what I can for them all, including the young one." she said gently stroking Alina's back "If its alright with your people, while I can't stay for too long, I'd like to stay for a bit, be there for Alina, and give her time to recover." she explained.

She blinked when Gentle Breeze mentioned a growth session. She nodded "What is a growth session?" she asked wondering. She seemed convinced these people where worthy of her trust, they had more then one opportunity to kill the group and they did not.

[Ryujin13]

(The other plant people aren't watching Fren, they're just eating and such.)

 

Gentle Breeze seemed to consider the question for a few moments then glanced around before continuing.

"A growth session is a number of things, a funeral, a meditation, a child birth. It is all these things and more. I think it will help Alina to see and deal with what has happened. The rest of you are invited of course." She said, somewhat reluctantly as she realized she had invited Vita on accident. "But as watchers only. Alina will be encouraged to participate. It is your choice of course."

 

Avira looked over at the hatchling, knowing that the little girl was having much more of an issue coping with everything that had happened then herself.

"I stay here if it's alright." Avira said finally. "I'll honor the dead in my own way."

 

Gentle Breeze nodded and waited until everyone was finished, then made the table and chairs disappear back into the ground.

"Come with me." She said gently to Fren, but mostly to Alina. Turning and walking with the Shatong into the forest.

"There is no need to worry about entering the forest with me or one of the others with you. We know the way back, and no one will leave you out here alone." She explained to Fren. "When we arrive we will take spots in the circle. You do not need to do anything, but I would like you to participate as best you can. There is no need to sing though, you cannot actually form the words, so just listen and you will understand." Gentle said as a sound came from up ahead. It was an unearthly harmony, beautiful voices raised together in a song that sent a shiver down ones spine while also filling ones heart with hope. The song was one of love, of loss, of hope, and of the banishing of fear. It told of a life well lived, of a person well loved, and of hope that the person found peace as their body was returned to the earth.

As the group came closer to the song a light could be seen up ahead through the shadows that the trees cast from above. It was a faint blue the pulsed along with the song, and as the group entered the light a circle of beings became visible, all singing with their eyes closed. At the center of the circle lay the figure of a male plant person, his form tall and rough. He had obviously lived a long time and already the leaves about his head were withering.

Gentle Breeze led Fren and Alina to an opening in the circle where Gentle Breeze joined in the singing.

How long the song lasted none could tell, it could have been minutes or days, but finally it reached a crescendo before coming to a slow halt.

At this Gentle Breeze stepped forward and walked to a space behind the beings head so that she stood above him.

"The old ones created us in an image that they knew was good and pure." She began, her voice soft and respectful. "They created us to live in our environment and be at peace, to know no war or fear, to live and return to the earth in our own time. Humans cheapened events like these with words about those who had left them, they spoke of how that person was good and kind and even what kind of person they were. The truth is, these things don't matter. What matters is what the person leaves behind. The memories they gave, the wisdom they shared, the lives they touched. Who a person truly was can be judged by this alone, because the emotions, the thoughts, and the love he left behind reflect on what kind of person he was. Some races wonder what becomes of one after their death. They wonder on what happens to their soul, their being. We, the children of the old ones know the truth, that life is renewed always, that the forest fire might burn down miles and miles, but always the forest will regrow."

Gentle Breeze reached down and gently took a scoop of dirt from a pile that sat nearby, and carefully laid it on top of the male. Slowly the others did the same, always placing but one scoop on his chest. As this went on he seemed to slowly begin to either away. When it came to Fren's turn Alina seemed to be almost frightened, but took a small paw full of dirt and put it on top of the man. By the time the man was covered the dirt had sunk to a point where the body was obviously gone.

"With the passing of this one, we have witnessed his body rejoin the earth. With this knowledge we look upon its place of rest and witness new life born into the world." Gentle continued, gesturing to the pile where a sprout had begun to form. Up it went until it was a foot tall, and at the top was a single seed. "In time, this seed will grow, and eventually become a new person in this world, brought about by the last gift of the man who resides now in the thoughts and memories of those he knew in life. The life that springs will be his gift to the world, but not the final one, for this gift is the result of hundreds of gifts before, just the latest in a line of life. Remember this man, remember the memories he gifted, the wisdom he shared, and the love he gave. Remember him for these things, and know that he died for a purpose, to give new life into this world." Gentle Breeze finished, looking down at the plant before quietly moving around it to rejoin Alina and Fren.

 

Alina was crying now, her emotions running the gambit between anger, sadness and acceptance. It was the first time she had truly faced her emotions, and though she was a long, long way from being anywhere close to alright, she at least seemed to admitting that the emotions existed rather then just ignoring them and everything else in the world.

[little lost dragon]

Fren tilted her head thinking but saw no reason not to attend, such things where ceremony's, and frankly she was a little dry on her idea supply to help Alina out. She nodded and had a few more bites before getting up and following Gentle Breeze. At first she was on high alert till she was told that as long as one of the plant people where with them, they where safe. Otherwise they'd be lost. She nodded as it was explained what she was to do. she gently held Alina against her chest till they arrived at the location. Fren went to the area Gentle Breeze went to before she gently placed Alina down on her own paws though kept her tail tip making contact with the hatchlings to let her know Fren was there for her.

 

When it came time for the speech Fren listened though found some of it strange. Burn a forest enough times and it will never grow again due to lack of seeds and too much ash preventing the remaining seeds from getting at the soil. A few here and there might grow back but would take years before hand. This seemed part of a religon, judging by how it was stated that these people where children of the 'old ones'. She did not interrupt or anything and let Alina at least hear the words. It was hard to tell at first if Alina was listening at all. But turn out she was as Fren took a handful of dirt and placed it on the body a tiny pawful showed up beside her hand. She smiled and gently stroked Alina's back to calm the hatchling.

When it ended Alina was crying again, but this case that met Alina was at least back now, not detached. She picked the young oen up and hugged her more against her neck before looking at Gentle Breeze "thank you, now that she's letting her emotions out, she'll need time to sort them out and gather her self up again, would it be ok if she and I spent a few nights here? I understand the risk, the castle may not be back for a long time, we'll join Avira and Vita on the quest as soon as Alina is recovered and such." she explained.

[Ryujin13]

"Staying or going is your choice, not mine." Gentle Breeze said as she led Fren back towards the clearing. "I have extended an invitation for you to remain if you wish, and if that means only a few days, then that is your choice. I would urge you to consider something however." She said, her voice gentle as they walked. "I know that you are aware of what the cursed place is doing to you and your child. It brings nightmares, gives only heartache and death, it is a place of evil. This one has already witnessed its evil more then most, and she is already mute. I would urge you to think of staying permanently. That place is not one for a child such as her, nor is it a place for normal beings. Have you considered the possibility that the cage cannot be opened except by a mortals hands? If that's true then you being there only increases the risk of it being opened. I already know your answer to these questions, and that is your choice, but I feel I would be remiss as a host to not point them out."

They had arrived at the clearing again, and it was different in the sunlight, full of blooms and color, with different plants scattered around. Birds of some kind chirped in the trees and circled far overhead.

"There are seedlings over there if Alina would like to say hello." Gentle Breeze said, pointing to an area where a number of children were playing a game involving stones. There were four girls and two boys, both of which were of the non-humanoid kind, while the girls were all like Gentle Breeze and Shifting Leaves.

"I can come with you if you she wants to try."

[little lost dragon]

Fren nodded but had to pause as Gentle Breeze explained about the cage only able to be opened by mortal hands "If the mortal hands is true, then its imperative we resume our quest then, as one of the beings has a mortal under her control. Its only a matter of time before the one of lust and desire and ambition gets whats inside that cage." she explained with a sigh.

When Alina was offered to go say hello to them, Fren nodded and smiled a little. "Would you like to meet others your age Alina?" she asked gently knowing that if Alina wished it, and could control her onw powers, she could return here any time she wanted.

[Ryujin13]

Gentle Breeze nodded with understanding when Fren told her that one of the powers held a mortal, but didn't say any more. Instead she looked at Alina who was shivering a little.

She didn't want to be parted from Fren, she didn't want to leave Fren at all for fear of her mother disappearing, but Fren also wanted her to be brave, and seemed to think that playing might be a good idea. So Alina gave a little nod and followed Gentle Breeze over to the group of children, making sure that Fren was still close to her at all times.

"Young ones." Gentle Breeze said, catching the children's attention. "This is Alina. She's going through a tough time right now so I need you all to be on your best behavior. Make her feel welcome." She explained before saying something in the children's own language. After making sure that all the children understood Gentle turned and walked off a ways, creating two chairs for her and Fren to sit in as she did so.

One of the girls, closer to Alina's age then the others, approached Alina who's eyes were very large and showed fear. The little girl just sat down cross-legged and smiled at Alina.

"Hi, I'm White Petals, but everyone just calls me Petals" She said in a friendly manner.

Alina gave a half hearted smile back but was still on the verge of bolting.

"It's ok, the lady says you don't talk right now but that's fine, do you wanna play with me?"

Alina looked at Fren, then back at Petals before giving a small nod.

Petals smiled and stood taking Alina off to one side where they began to play a game that Petals had obviously made up. They used small flowers that Petals managed to grow as game pieces, and soon Alina was enjoying herself, though still not talking and always glancing at Fren to check that the Shatong was still there.

Petals didn't seem to mind that Alina didn't talk, she seemed perfectly fine with chattering away by herself although she still liked to see Alina smile.

While they played she worked with her hands, using flowers to make a ring until eventually it formed a small crown.

"Here Alina, now we're friends forever!" Petals said, placing the crown on Alina's head and hugging the hatchling, who surprisingly enough hugged back.

After that they went back to their game, although Alina seemed much more at ease then before.

 

"She is a remarkable child." Gentle Breeze said to Fren as they watched the children. "I have to wonder though, how and when are you going to deal with her questions about her parents?" She asked quietly, smiling at the surprise that Fren showed when asked. "Bor comes ere quite often. He came here when he grew angry over Jak and Kara. He is a force of nature and went to a destroyed section of the woods to vent his anger. It took him three days to calm down enough to tell us what had happened. So, have you looked at the book?"

[little lost dragon]

Fren smiled when Alina gave a shaky nod and gently placed her on her own paws before walking with her and Gentle Breeze to the play area. The kids where introduced to Alina and Fren joined Gentle at the set of chairs that had been grown though due to her tail thickness she ended up more sitting on her tail's base and half crouching. She gave a smile and a nod every time Alina looked to check on her. A pang of sadness showed up in her heart knowing that the hatchling could not spend the rest of her life in such a safe place.

She nodded as Gentle spoke though looked at her in a bit of a questioning manner on how she knew such things. Then it was explained that Bor came here often. He took out a section of the woods in his anger at Kara's and Jaks losses. When asked if she had the book she nodded and a small pocket just big enough for the book opened on her suit. Little moist on the out side but a membrane had been formed from cover to cover to protect the pages. she removed this as well so they could look at it with out issue "Alina has asked about her parents a few times, however I'm telling her its a..... possibility, we don't know for sure if her parent's are alive or not, she seems to understand that, as for the book...... tonight will be the first real time I could use it. When I first had it, a ghoul tried to use me as a breeder, Bor removed it before it got any further after a day of it..... that left me weak, then we ran into one of Varren's old team that had been captured and her dead body used to make a new guardien of the cursed place, hopefully they both rest in peace now. He used him self to save the rest of the group." she explained leaving out the part of Avira causing the second monster by taking 2 data cubes rather just the one she was told. "Alina went into her depression and...... up until we got here..." she finished off saying before looking at Gentle Breeze "I'm thinking tonight will be a good time, provided no disasters happen." she admitted.

[Ryujin13]

"I didn't mean that you should show it to her tonight, or even anytime soon. She is still in shock and teetering on the brink of shutting down completely. Learning something like that... It could very well break her to the point that she might not be able to recover. What we see right now is a patch, a bandaid at most. She still needs to work through a lot of different emotional issues before I would even touch on the subject." Gentle Breeze said quietly before going quiet for a time. On the far six of the clearing Avira was working on something, seeming to have dug up a large rock and doing something with it. She sat cross-legged and was moving her hand back and forth across the stone.

"Bor didn't say anything about her." Gentle said. "What do you make of her? She's obviously a fighter but she's smart. She worries about her friends, but can remain professional at the same time. She also had a lot of deep seated issues. That's just what I see though, what about you?"

[little lost dragon]

Fren seemed to think on this and nodded "To be honest..... Alina's my first, my people are.... its our nature to have young long before now but thanks to the humans where I'm from some have to put aside there drives to ensure the rest can continue." she said with a sigh looking at Alina "Once she harnesses her own ability's she will be able to return at any time at any point she desires. Part of why I don't mind her making friends here." she explained before looking at Avira and frowned "She's the source of Varrens death. He had explained to her in detail what happens when data cubes are taken, per data cube the cursed place sends a monster at you and your team. She grabbed 2 got past the first, then one of rotting flesh and runes attacked us. Took Varrens suits self destruct device, made the cursed place's walls shake even. Had Avira listened and paid attention and stuck to the plan, Alina might still be distraught but not as bad as she is now." she explained "Varren saw something in her, I don't know what, but I hope what he saw shows its self." she said not sounding like she trusted Avira "That aside, she has her issues, but she keeps her hold very well considering who her makers where." she admitted.

[Ryujin13]

Gentle nodded pensively as Fren spoke, thinking on the words as she watched Avira work.

"Avira might be the cause of Varren's death, but I don't think she needs to be reminded. She has dozens of things haunting her thoughts including Varren, and having someone hammer it home won't help. You and I are a lot alike, Fren. We both view humans for what they really are, though our problems differ overall. You see them as a warmongering race that seeks to bend all it sees under its own rule, and while I see part of the same thing, I see them destroying their planet, the earth that they sprang from. Avira is an oddity though. She sits at the cusp between us and the humans. She doesn't dislike them, but she also doesn't sing them praises either." Gentle said quietly as Avira's ears flicked towards a noise in the brush. "She was created by humans for bad reasons and had been treated worse. Even if she won't admit it to herself the truth is she resents the humans for what they've done. They created her, gave her false memories, made her work to own herself, used her and her friends to fight battles because they were told to, and any number of other things. She looks at her life and compares it to others like her and tells herself that she is well off, but only when looked at from her height. Anyone else can see that she is in a bad place. Humanity has taken everything from her and held it over her head to make her act like them. She has to do what they say, act as they do, and hope they continue to allow her to act like a person. She-"

"Having a good time talking about me?" Avira called over as she stood and walked towards them, anger in her eyes. "I can hear very well, and I'd love it if you two didn't sit there and talk about me or my life behind my back."

Gentle opened her mouth to say something but Avira shook her head and interrupted. "Maybe you're right, maybe my life does suck, maybe I do hate the hand I've been dealt, but I still like who and what I am. Do I wish I were treated better? Yes. Do I wish I could walk down the street without being pointed and gawked at? Yes. But it's what I have to work with, so I deal with it." Avira continued, cutting over anyone's attempts to interrupt.

Gentle seemed to have settled in and was listening with interest, gauging what was said and how, stowing the information away for future use.

"As for my 'issues', there are quite a few." Avira continued, using air quotes around 'issues'. "Let's see if I can start from the top shall I? I don't have parents so I never knew anyone but the inside of a VR chamber for my early years. I don't technically own myself even though I own my mortgage, so yes my life is valued in dollars and not based on who I am. Almost everywhere I go I'm treated as either a pet or a slave. I've been taken advantage of, forced into a job because I was created to do it, and I'm still trying to figure out if I'm really a person or just some machine that happens to be able to ask philisophical questions. I recently learned there is a little remote that let's a person make a chimera forget everything until the last time they slept, and now I wonder every day how many times it's been used on me, and how many days I've actual lived. Oh, and the icing on the cake, I was out into a slave brothel where I was humiliated, beaten, and sold for use to any man or woman who had the money, every day, for over three months. They used computers to change how my team and I think, so now I don't even know how much of me there is from before that happened. So yes, I have issues, no I don't like to talk about them, and yeah Fren, you're probably right, Varren's death was my fault so thanks for the reminder!" Avira yelled, tears flowing again as she told Fren off. When she had finally blown herself out she immediately turned and, ignoring Fren, picked up her rock and went as far across the clearing as she could where she sat, her back to the group, and began to work once more.

 

Alina meanwhile was in a turmoil as Fren was yelled at. It was scary, which meant that hiding with her mother was the best option, but the mean lady was between her and Fren, making it impossible to get there. So Alina just stood frozen in place until Petals stood and hugged Alina, making the hatchling start, then hug back. Alina liked Petals, and wished that everything didn't scare her anymore so she could play with Petals better.

Gentle watched Avira go, a calculating look on her face, then looked at Fren. "And that's the missing piece to that puzzle." She said thoughtfully. "I've been trying to place where her troubles were coming from, after all an existential crisis like the one she's having is strange for someone so young, but now it makes sense. I can see why she would be concerned. Anyone would be in that situation, especially after what she said happened."

Edited July 3, 2014 by Ryujin13

[little lost dragon]

Fren watched Alina play with Pedals as Gentle Breeze spoke. The Shatong looked at the plant lady when she spoke about them bein a lot alike. She agreed the fox lady was a icon of her creators actions and work as well. She remained with her thoughtful look as Gentle spoke right up till Avira seemed to lose it. She looked over at the fox lady as she stormed over and began to tell them off. Fren just got her narrowed eye look but now with out a baby ghoul and some time to recover. The fox lady could not affect her as much any more.

Though it was interesting to hear. Avira just told them in a nut shell many things she had not spoken about before, or things she told Varren. she knew the 2 had a few sessions of talking quietly to each other only when they thought she had been sleeping. What they said was hard to pick up on at the time.

"I take it back, her control is only decent when not stressed. I might of lost it a few times in the cursed place, however I had a ghoul living in me at the time as well." she stated "Which is gone now though." she quickly added. "Though such is not her fault, everything created inherits some of the creators features. Be it personality, ways of thinking, and looks. In this case its behaveral. Humans had always been a loose cannon when it came to emotions. Even in there troops they where suprizingly easy to sway if caught out of uniform. Avira was created by humans, all in all she's a synthetic human, that was given fox features." she concluded with a sigh "We all got problems, though thankfully Alina getting some help, that's one of mine down." she said with a smile.

 

She paused for a few moments then sighed "Gentle Breeze, while on the subject of issues, You and your people I feel I can trust, I'm unsure how to..... help my self, or how to determine the issue entirely. When I was young my home and everyone I knew was killed in moments..... Long story short one of the bombs the humans used threw me out of the bombing zone and I was spared. I was rescued and by then all out war had been declared do to the humans actions. Which inlcuded the bombing of 2 other colonies. I displayed a gift for.... as the humans put it, being an assassin. I focused on homing that ability, running.... hiding from my own problems, I did not know I needed help until after it costed a child his life, I was.... in a fight with a colony ships secority, they had detected me. I should have noticed him but a child was playing in the ships vents that go from deck to deck. He must of saw the secority and thought he'd be safe go to them, I fired at the guards, the kid was too close and...... anything unprotected and of a bio mature dies slowly and painfully....... Hearing the childs suffering woke me up. I knew that.... I needed help. But at the time I was too far behind enemy lines to seek it out. I promised my self though..... no matter the mission I would not harm a inosent again. Espeashally a child." she explained before looking back at Gentle Breeze "Since I'm here for at least a few days...... do you know someone who might be able to help?" she asked quietly.

[Ryujin13]

Gentle smiled a little and shrugged, glancing around.

"I think you're misunderstanding this place Fren. We aren't a place to help with people's issues, we're just a society living by our own rules. That being said, the triad has been here for centuries, which gives us a unique perspective on everything. So I can only try to give my opinion and hope it works for you." Gentle explained. "As for your problem, I think you already know the answer, you just need someone else to say it." Gentle said quietly. "You blame yourself for surviving the bombing of your planet, but what would your death have accomplished? Alina would be motherless, your work wouldn't have helped the war effort, and anything you have ever done would never have happened. The child... The child was an accident, and you can't blame yourself for his death. Avira would tell you the same thing I think, there are casualties in war, not all of them the enemy. Even though it's hard, even though it's not right, you have to look at yourself and you have to come to your own conclusion. I can say what you need to hear, but you have to accept that for the truth. The child's death wasn't your fault. You were fighting, which in of itself is chaotic, and you tried to deal with your enemy. An innocent was in the blast, and even though the not right, even though it's horrible what happened, you need to accept that it wasn't your fault, and that there wasn't anything you could have done." Gentle explained. "I don't think you would have hurt that child on purpose, and even though it was a terrible accident, and even though feeling bad for the death of the child is right, it still doesn't change the fact that it was an accident that couldn't have been avoided because you lacked the information to change the outcome."

[little lost dragon]

Fren listened and looked at the ground. Tilting her head at first when Gentle mentioned the bombing. She had not expected to hear that one.... why would she blame her self for that though? Because she should have joined her friends and family she blinked at the thought though. Did such a thought remain and affect her so much? And the childs death...... thing was she knew the child was there, she could detect him, but at the time, she did not pay any mind to the new signature on her chemical radar. You should have been paying more attention! she looked at Gentle Breeze as she spoke and then away then sighed "Possibly, the bombing..... Once rescued I was placed right into training and just kept everything..... hushed up. Then I spoke about it only a day or 2 ago and almost everyone who heard it...... died the next day." she admitted "One died saving the group, another kidnapped, another saving the group again....." she looked at the sky Its like I'm a curse the thought entered her head and she shook her head "Does..... pent up emotions go chaotic when one starts to ease off on its confinements?" she asked "And I its not like I think this is a place for peoples issues, I just see a opportunity to get some possible help that I might not be able to get later. Just like helping Alina.... she's having fun now, she's made a new friend, something she badly needed, something she could not do had we not stumbled onto your grounds." she explained "With my allies leaving to resume the quest, I feel I must resolve what I can with Alina and I so that way when we do rejoin them on the quest, we won't be burdens." she admitted.

[Ryujin13]

"Emotions are chaotic by their definition Fren." Gentle said with a smile. "But yes, penning them up does end badly. It's like putting a dam in front of a river. If you don't release the pressure, eventually things will erupt to the detriment of others. An example is what we just saw from Avira. The emotions she showed were natural, healthy even. She is angry for being used, scared that she might be used again, ashamed that she didn't fight harder, worried that her team might be in danger without her, and terrified that all this will only reveal that she shouldn't exist, that she is a lesser being like a lot of the humans think. That is what's truly on her mind, and what we just experienced was what happens when you hold those kinds of things in. That isn't to say that she didn't have a good reason to hold it in, after all, showing these emotions in front of her team might have weakened them. To her, she a a strongpoint, a place for her team to anchor around. To show weakness would compromise the team, so she holds it in. She also doesn't like to show weakness in front of outsiders either, because they might use it against her. It might make her vulnerable again, and in her mind if she's vulnerable she might as well be back in that brothel." Gentle explained, gesturing slightly in Avira's direction. "The thing is though, when looked at it from the outside, fears, issues, they seem like trivialities, nonissues. But to the person living them, thy are the world, even if they don't truly realize it. You fear only a few things, but they weigh on you like a stone sitting on a leaf. You fear that your life is a mistake, that the others in the bomb radius deserved to live more. You fear that your parents, your family would be ashamed of what you have done with your life. You're afraid of failing the child that you killed. Now you fear that you are killing everyone you know, just like everyone you knew died in the bomb blast. And above all others, you fear that you will kill Alina, like you did the boy in the vent, or worse, that you will die, and she will become like you because you couldn't save her."

Gentle said all this quietly, not trying to upset Fren, instead only stating what she saw.

"Fren, some of these fears are natural. Wanting to save Alina and your friends is a good thing, worrying about their death is natural, but blaming yourself for things that you couldn't control isn't, and that's the root of the problem. You need to accept the things that happened in the past so that you can more effectively confront the future."

Edited July 6, 2014 by Ryujin13

[little lost dragon]

Fren looked at the ground as Gentle spoke. She looked at Alina as the hatchling played. She turned to looked at Gentle Breeze as she finished speaking. There was a long pause before she seemed to come to a conclusion. "You make it sound almost simple." she said quietly "Almost..... must look ridicules, a operative one who is behind enemy lines, the source of countless deaths, one that learned her way around the enemy defences and guards and more...... yet could not figure out something like this." she said before sighing and shaking her head. "While I'm sure its different for everyone.... experiencing such things, would you happen to know a few ways others have gone about...... coming to accept such things?" she asked "Seeing as I haven't been able to...... convince my self of this in all my years of life so far....."

[Ryujin13]

"Like I said, looking at another's life and seeing what their problems are is so much more different then living them and knowing them." Gentle said with a small smile. "Someone could say that your worries and fears are stupid and groundless, but they don't experience them, they haven't lived them. It would be like someone losing something special. It may seem stupid and worthless to another, but to them there is emotion attached to it, and that's what makes it theirs. The same is the with things like your problems. They might be stupid to those who are unattached, but to you, there's emotion there, which means it's your problem." Gentle sighed and looked up at the sun, her green eyes closing with bliss as the warmth touched her.

"Fren, what you seek isn't mine to give." Gentle said finally. "I can't tell you how to go about forgiving yourself. Nor can I tell you how to move on from the past. There are some things that just can't be solved by anyone else. The only thing I can do is offer advice and maybe an ear that can listen, but the rest is up to you. I'll provide what advice I can, but it's limited, and I don't guarantee it's helpfulness." Gentle Breeze gave a sad smile as she talked, obviously sorry that she couldn't help more.

"I think the root of the problem comes down to your fear of failure." Gentle said after a few moments of pondering. "I think that you're afraid of failing more then anything else, afraid of failing your family, the child you killed, your friends, your superiors, Alina. You're afraid of failing all of them and causing more deaths. You need to realize that you aren't perfect, no one is. Failure is a part of life, and it helps things grow stronger to fail. If Alina didn't fall when she ran, she wouldn't learn how to not fall. Accepting that you're not perfect is the first step in the healing process I think."

[little lost dragon]

Fren sighed and closed her eye's. What was being said went against most of her training, her field of work. Failer met death, death met others died in much greater numbers. Or in training failer met she was not as efficient and sometimes even a burden. She opened her eye's and watched Alina play some more "Perhaps.... I suppose only time will tell.... I'll think on what you've said today, hopefully..... maybe some things will be resolved." she said slowly her bright yellow eye's turning towards Gentle once more "On a lighter note, have you ever been a mother?" she asked with a small smile before looking at Alina "If so...... what kind of advice might you have for mothering? I've never been a mother until I adopted Alina, at times I feel..... I might be letting her cling too often, but at the same time..... I'm unsure if its a good time to.... to...." she frowned trying to word it "She does not drink my.... humans would call it milk, so weening her won't be the best term." she said "I know right now, is not the time at all, she only clings because she's afraid I'll go next, but once she's recovered..." she said sounding unsure.

[Ryujin13]

Gentle's smile widened at Fren's question and she gave a small laugh as she nodded.

"Yes, I've been a mother many times Fren." She said, still chuckling. "In human terms I am well over 10,000 years old, so yes, I have mothered a few." She smiled again and looked at Alina, considering her for a moment before continuing.

"I have only observed her for a little while Fren, and I am not familiar with her, or her species, so my advice isn't necessarily the best." Gentle paused again, considering her words like she always seemed to do before continuing.

"That being said, she is only a year old and she is already dealing with things that would make people older and wiser then her buckle. She was born in a dark place, a place that the universe should never have birthed, but did. She is frightened, and a frightened child will go to his or her mother because that is what nature designed. Before your Varren, Jak, or Kara disappeared, she talked correct? She laughed, she played, she was a child? And now that she has lost them she is hurt, lost even. Her family is disappearing out from under her and you are her rock. I don't know anything about how her species ages, but I cannot imagine any species demanding a child of one to cope with things like this on their own. Distancing yourself from her would do more long term damage then anything else you could possible do. Even if she made it through, she would hate you, she would view your distancing as your abandoning her. When you have left the cursed place and are free, then would be the time to begin work on that, but even then..." Gentle shook her head, watching as Petals and Alina resumed their game. "Fren she's never going to fully recover from this, you know that right?" She asked, turning to Fren again. "No one would recover from this. Get her out of that place soon and she can at least adapt, but the cursed place will always haunt some part of her mind, no matter how tiny it is. Seeing that much death and pain so young, she will never truly be free. All you can do is to help her try and move on with her life after she has left. You need to be there for her, and if that means letting her cling then do so. Do not let that place destroy a child, especially one like her."

[little lost dragon]

Fren watched Alina play with Pedals as she listened to Gentle Breeze as she spoke. She nodded and sighed "I know the cursed place will most likely forever scar her mind. I just hope that once we shut it down and make it back out......" she paused as she placed a hand on her head looking a little frustrated. She was torn in 2. On one hand she could stay here, once Alina learned how to control her powers Fren could return to her own people easily. But then again Fren had a obligation to her team members, Avira and Vita with his drone. There was a quest to be done, a mission to complete. But one that might further and permanently harm Alina.

"One hand I feel it would be best if I stayed here with Alina for her health...... yet on the other..... I have the mission to help the others with. But going back means taking Alina back which means more possible horror scarring her." she said eye's closed. After a few moments she seemed to conclude on something "I need to speak with my team. Alina..... needs to come first for me, she's only a child....... and one that if damaged further, the consequences could span far more then just where we end up." she said talking about Alina's powers "Maybe its...... time I let others do what I'm used to doing." she said in a somewhat strained voice. She was fighting years worth of training and work by doing this. But she was a mother too, and one of a very powerful being, and a very hurt being. She did not want o bring more harm on the young one.

She stood up and gently called Alina over knowing that if she left Alina would be distraught. She looked at Gentle Breeze and Pedals "We'll be back shortly." she said almost quietly.

 

She just hoped Bor would not feel cheated with her doing this. Chances where he'd support this but he had done her a favor, and she was part of the group he treated to some rest in hopes that they'd shut the place down since that met no more pawns for his siblings which met a constant stale mate.

[Ryujin13]

(Sorry for the space between posts, been busy lately)

 

Gentle nodded silently as Alina ran over to Fren. She didn't ask to be picked up, a good sign, but she did stay within a few feet of Fren at all times.

As Fren approached the group she could see that Avira seemed to have finished her project and was standing over a stone, looking down at it.

 

'Varren, a good friend' was etched on it, and Avira seemed to be contemplating it even though her ears had swiveled towards Fren as the Shatong approached.

"I don't know if Varren believed in a god." She said as Fren walked up. "I would pray for him, but I don't know him well enough. Most chimera don't believe in a god either. Kind of hard to believe in an all powerful creator when you see your creators every day."

Avira's voice was level, but her tail was drooping, and she seemed to be on the verge of breaking down again even if she was hiding it well.

Avira stayed silent for a little while after that, just staring at the stone before she finally turned and walked with Fren over to Vita.

 

Vita was having the worst of it, that much was obvious.

Avira doubted he cared, but the hatred that the people showed towards him was palpable. If hatred took a form, it would have exploded like a nuclear device.

Anyone who passed near him gave him a look of raw hatred. Hands gripped weapons tighter, children shot fearful looks at him, and a few had even told Vita in no uncertain terms that he was unwanted there.

Physically none had done anything though, and seemed to be content togive him a wide berth. Behind their hate they also feared him, and it told from their body language, which showed how nervous they were in his presence, even if they disguised it with anger and resentment.

 

"What's up?" Avira asked Fren as the group gathered. "Are you coming with us when we leave instead of staying?"

[little lost dragon]

((Np, its alright))

 

Fren smiled a little seeing Alina keeping pace with her. The fact the hatchling did not ask to be picked up or the fact she was not crying met something had been patched. and progress was progress no matter how small.

She paused as Avira spoke and looked at the stone. She looked at the words and sighed. "My people don't beleive in such things as all powerful creators. However with that aside, if they do happen to be out there, I hope he finds his peace." she said as Vita approached. She looked at them as Avira asked about what the verdict was. Fren closed her eye's and took a deep breath in, her sides seemingly rising instead of her chest before she let out it "With some.... further thought, I've decided it would be best for Alina and I to remain behind. She's far too young to deal with what she already has to, I would not be a very good mother if I continued to place her in situations that could permanently harm her." she explained "However in time, for me at least, once she's old enough, she and I will return to you guys, for all we know might be the moment you go through the door way again." she said knowing that if Alina trained her ability's, and a way was figured out so Fren could join her, they could go back in time and rejoin the group. Heck..... maybe even prevent some things from happening.

"The point is, I'm no longer a single Shatong, I'm a mother Shatong now, I have a child and her health needs to come first." she said with a nod trying to sound like she was confident. But her tail was somewhat stiff.

 

Vita looked at Avira "Based on information currently already known, and current status of Fren and her child, we could make better progress wi-" he paused when Fren shot him a glare "Apologies." he said

[Ryujin13]

Avira looked overland down at the hatchling who was currently sitting next to Fren's feet, watching an insect some kind land on a flower. Now that she thought about it Avira realized she had never even heard the small dragon speak, and that in of itself was a bad thing.

"Do what you need to do Fren, Alina needs your help more then anything else." She said with a nod. "I hope it works out for you and her." Avira said, extending a hand and shaking Fren's before nodding and walking off a ways to sit under a nearby tree.

The truth was that Avira wasn't really that surprised at Fren's decision, especially with how the hatchling was reacting to a peaceful environment.

That being said it was hard to look at the situation now without thinking that she and Vita were doomed to failure. With only two people in the group it was going to be hard to fight there way out of any situation, let alone a tangle with one of the castles guardians. It wasn't looking good for their mission, which meant that they would be dooming existence if they failed.

Avira closed her eyes and tried to realax again, trying to achieve some sort of peace so that she could at least think clearly and not have her judgment clouded by worry or fear.