Posted December 15, 2013 (edited) @Pinkgothic, it wasn't meant to be...I know absolutely nothing about Patapon Ahaha, I thought it might not be, but I had to think of it. <3 ~! I should play it again... so hypnotic... nrrrgh... Edited December 15, 2013 by pinkgothic Share this post Link to post
Posted December 15, 2013 Accept: ...is this a Patapon reference? If so, you're *awesome*. -pg Accept: double space before "songwriting" ~PG Accept: Hey I just learned who Kyary was yesterday. ~D Accept: Interesting -Jay Accept: @Pinkgothic, it wasn't meant to be...I know absolutely nothing about Patapon Edit: I resubmitted it now, thanks for telling me about the double space, PG. Hmm. Now I have Lady Gaga bits of music stuck in my head... Share this post Link to post
Posted December 15, 2013 I have seen this description. Its good. Aw thanks! And pinkgothic, now you've got that music stuck in my head... Share this post Link to post
Posted December 15, 2013 And pinkgothic, now you've got that music stuck in my head... I am totally ... not sorry. *...runs away!* Share this post Link to post
Posted December 16, 2013 (edited) La'fraar Furmae - Pygmy La'fraar is the "thief" of her clan, said to often venture into the other clans' lands to scrounge for scraps and leftovers, always bringing enough meat to feed the Furmaen day after day. For this, she is regularly praised and admired by others of her clan. But, in truth, she is as clumsy as a bear and could never in her life sneak past the larger, more powerful dragons. What she truly does is entertain the beasts; standing on her hind legs and struggling to juggle berries on her paws as riotous laughter echoes throughout the greenland, attempting to race against a handsome Nhiostrife while females screech their approval, and even dancing to ancient tunes sung by the prettiest of the clans. When she returns, humiliated and worn-down, to her hopeful clan, a celebration is thrown and she smiles the brightest smile she can muster as she lays down her catch of the day. She sees the dragons' cheerful faces and reminds herself to never tell the truth, to never shatter their hopes of her. • Accept: • Accept: Oh, hi Evo! Onto the topic, it's a pretty good descripton. -H360 • Accept: • Accept: Love it! -CL Thanks, Hazel and CL. Akh'munre Booratian - Green Opal Akh'munre are two separate dragons in heart and in mind. The two heads still don't quite understand that they are of the same body, despite the say-so of the other dragons. They believe themselves as close as two friends or closer, like twins, but no closer than that. Mun (the left head) had often felt a restraining pull whenever he wished to leave Re's side, but he soon thought of it as a sign to stick close to the other dragon. Re, on the other hand, has never tried to leave Mun's side, and has no wish to do so. He had long ago discovered that the horrors of the world without his friend, who was asleep at the time, were too dangerous to face alone. Several have already discussed all the possible explanations as to why the two heads behave the way they do, and one had ended the topic with a few, simple words; "They were dropped as an egg." • Accept: Nice description-H360 • Accept: Great! ~D • Accept: • Accept: Wee! Accepts make me so happy. :3 Zes'bor Verlhin - Pink Zes'bor is a ladylike dragon who isn't ashamed to say so. Dragons either deliberately avoid him, or mercilessly abuse him until he's red, black, and blue all over. But he doesn't seem to mind, even to the point that he tells Zes'bracke, a fatherly figure who's Zes'bor's only companion, that "the colors blend with my scales, don't you think." It often leaves Bracken with an odd mixture of defensiveness and exasperation. Zes'bor believes that expressing anger towards his tormenters would be a waste of time and always claims he prefers to ignore them. "You think a woman would do that," asked Bracken once. "A smart woman, yes," replied Zes'bor. "They'll leave me be, you'll see." Zes'bracke had only sighed, but he worried for the Pink. And so, the day after, Zes'bor wasn't mistreated in the slightest. He was confused, but Zes'bracke had assured him, "Maybe you were right, after all." Ever since then, Zes'bracke has always been protecting Zes'bor, even if the other dragon doesn't notice it. • Accept: • Accept: Great! ~D Thanks, D and stranger. Sometimes, I can't help but love comments more than descriptions. Edited December 16, 2013 by Evolette Share this post Link to post
Posted December 16, 2013 (edited) Sometimes, I can't help but love comments more than descriptions. I can't help but agree. Little is known about this mystic dragon, except that she goes by the name "Sweetie Bot". She claims to have travelled to other planets, and even parallel dimensions. Sweetie Bot often tells stories to the hatchlings, and one of them is about another reality where strange things called "robots" have murdered all the native species. Of course, only the most gullible ones actually believe her. Accept: *traveled Me: Nope, there's nothing wrong with "travelled". Edited December 17, 2013 by Hazel360 Share this post Link to post
Posted December 17, 2013 I just had to share this one. Falstaof is an amateur cooking enthusiast with dreams of being the head chef at a expansive palace with a crew of hundreds at his disposal and even more awaiting his delicious meals. Unfortunately, his dreams of splendor couldn't be farther from the truth. He lives in a small clan that survives from the fallen nuts and smaller animals that are plentiful during their patron season and don't appreciate his attempts to turn their meals into art. He has tried making other dishes with materials traded from a nearby human market, but his last dish didn't turn out so well... his noodles turned a pale purple and carried a faint lavender scent. This failure has become his most famous, jokingly referred to as "Cooking Adventures, Chapter 17: Falstaof and the Lavender Noodles." Comments: Accept: OK I need to let Dimar tell me that story in full -H Accept: Lavender noodles sound very interesting. I'd try them. Accept: But they were so yummy anyway! ~D This was inspired by a crazy (and true) story Dimar told me... But the second comment made me LOL. Thanks for the laugh, mystery commenter! Share this post Link to post
Posted December 17, 2013 Being a Cheese Dragon, Bertholdt Sevre doesn't have an applicable gender - but because he seems masculine, he refers to himself as a .. he. He's extremely cautious and constantly is on the lookout for other hungry, desperate dragons .. but not because he doesn't want them to eat him. He just needs a meal himself. •Accept: •Accept: OK ~PG •Accept: Not bad-H360 •Abstain: *as a he. *is constantly on *dragons... but ~D •Accept: •Accept: Excellent. I didn't need to edit anything. <3 Share this post Link to post
Posted December 20, 2013 (edited) Binzhi loves fruit punch. Once a week in the summer, he'll set aside a few hours to make his way to a town, where a family sells fruits. They are famous for their cider and punch, so there are always long lines, even when the drink lines are separated. He rarely makes it to the front before the proprietors run out of punch. One day, Binzhi arrives in town hours later than he planned. As he walks down the main road, he hears townspeople talking about the good harvest. He grows hopeful that the harvest includes fruit and quickens his pace, passing people happily eating fruit and sipping drinks. It's getting late. The store is in sight, but there is a crowd at the front. Oh no, Binzhi thinks, there is no way I'll get any punch. He takes to the air to survey and sees that the crowd is surrounding and cooing at a pair of drake hatchlings, not waiting at the store. He squeezes past and eagerly enters the store to queue up for punch. There is a cider line. Surprise -- there is no punch line. Abstain: Punch line, oh god... Anyway, I think the internal monologue bit needs quotation marks although I can't find it in the guidelines atm. If descriptions could have italicized text, I'd use it. What do you think about the quotation marks thing, folks? Edited December 20, 2013 by dirtytabs Share this post Link to post
Posted December 21, 2013 If descriptions could have italicized text, I'd use it. What do you think about the quotation marks thing, folks? You could probably fake it with apostrophes? Share this post Link to post
Posted December 21, 2013 Since you're sticking first person pronouns in those internal thoughts, please do use something to offset them. Either quotation marks or single quotation marks/apostrophe marks. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 21, 2013 Got it. Used up every character in the process. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 21, 2013 If descriptions could have italicized text, I'd use it. What do you think about the quotation marks thing, folks? I read that description and I didn't see the punch line coming till the very end Share this post Link to post
Posted December 22, 2013 That 'punch line' description made me laugh. Awesome. Can't wait to catch that in my review queue, if I ever do (seeing as I'm slow and it's likely to be met with modly approval before I get there)... Anyway! Count Daedalus is the second pure childe of the Montague line of vampires and a hunting companion of Count Secundus. The two have a relationship much akin to brothers despite their bloodline technically being separate, with Secundus a childe of Countess Montague and Daedalus a childe of Count Montague. Daedalus tolerates his 'brother's' mood-swings, helping him cover up the worst of his slips of civilised behaviour out of amicable generosity - and because his own neck is on the line, since his sire has on a few select occasions insinuated that he's responsible of keeping Secundus in line. This is especially true if the backlash might tarnish the reputation of the family as a whole, which would never be tolerated. Accept: I would correct "child" but a quick Google search implied that it's used sometimes with vampires, so I assume that's what you mean. ~D Oops. I didn't realise the vampiric term childe wasn't common knowledge. Is there something else that would cause less confusion? (I'm not desperate for a synonym, it's fine as it is, obviously, but if there is something better then I'd be very happy to use it. <3) Share this post Link to post
Posted December 22, 2013 Accept: I would correct "child" but a quick Google search implied that it's used sometimes with vampires, so I assume that's what you mean. ~D Oops. I didn't realise the vampiric term childe wasn't common knowledge. Is there something else that would cause less confusion? (I'm not desperate for a synonym, it's fine as it is, obviously, but if there is something better then I'd be very happy to use it. <3) I'd leave it. If someone isn't aware of the meaning, a trip to Wikipedia or Google shouldn't be a problem, and they might learn something new, which is exactly what your inquisitive reviewer did. <3 Share this post Link to post
Posted December 23, 2013 (edited) Accept: I would correct "child" but a quick Google search implied that it's used sometimes with vampires, so I assume that's what you mean. ~D Oops. I didn't realise the vampiric term childe wasn't common knowledge. Is there something else that would cause less confusion? (I'm not desperate for a synonym, it's fine as it is, obviously, but if there is something better then I'd be very happy to use it. <3) Hmm. I almost suggested correcting childe, then realized you'd done that deliberately. (It was I, though, who had issues with Montagu(e) ) Edited December 23, 2013 by Lagie Share this post Link to post
Posted December 23, 2013 Hmm. I almost suggested correcting childe, then realized you'd done that deliberately. (It was I, though, who had issues with Montagu(e) ) Aah, that was you! I didn't actually pick the name. Both recent vampire descriptions of mine relate to the Count Project. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 26, 2013 (edited) Brain Capacity One Megabite (Male Adult Zombie) This dragon is - for a zombie - enormously intelligent. In fact, he claims to be a thousand times more intelligent than his zombie brethren. Where other zombies can only remember their single last victim, he recalls his last one thousand bites (or one Megabite). That would make him a thousand times more intelligent... if he could spell the word correctly. Thus, in reality, the dragon is only nine hundred ninety nine times cleverer than all his kin. Still kind of impressive, though. Accept: I laughed at 'Megabite' and again at the end. Accept: Yay for corrections -H Accept: Punpunpunpun~ Bwahaha, the pun is killing me! Fantastic. -pg Accept: Haha, very nice! ~PG Accept: Accept: HA! I love it, Rally. ~D Plus one comment that pointed out an error that I changed at the same time, so that one was for the old description - I too often mix up 'than' and 'then'. Accept: "intelligent than his zombie". Still a bit funny. - MC1 Pimp My Hide (female s2 Grave hatchling) This hatchling, once all white, applied to a popular show 'Pimp My Hide' on MTV (the Millennium Theatre Variety). Anyone who wanted to participate had to send in a parchment wherein they described why they were discontent with their current state. Any hatchling chosen would win a makeover at the tattoo specialists of West Cave Customs. The hatchling won, and the presenter of the show, a somewhat well-known minstrel named Eggzibit, picked the hatchling up for the makeover (which was done under anesthesia). Unfortunately, the first thing the hatchling heard when he regained consciousness was Eggzibit saying: "Yo dawg, I heard you like flames so we put some flames on your hide so you can flame people when you hide." That was the moment the hatchling realized that Reality Theatre is a bad thing... Accept: Why am I not surprised this one is yours Rally -H Accept: That is hilarious ~PG Accept: Accept: *facepalm* Oh gosh, this is so funny. ~D Accept: Accept: Aww... Poor thing. Davy Jones' Locker Room Talk (male s2 Red-Finned Tidal hatchling) This hatchling is part of the crew of the Flying Dutchman. Labor conditions aboard are hard and strenuous (the bosun even has a whip!), and every crew member yearns for the centennial shift change. During the off-hours, the crew removes their scary work outfit consisting of sawfish saws, hammerhead heads or pink shellfish and changes into their causal outfits in Davy Jones' Locker Room. It doesn't come as a surprise that sailors have loose mouths - if there is a locker room, there is locker room talk. This hatchling tops them all. He always has the latest and most spicy gossip - whose rapier is bent, who has crabs, and who visited a mermaid in the vicinity of Tortucave and returned with the black spot! Yes, this STD - sailor transmitted destiny - is the worst of them all. Even a single bearer of the Black Spot can doom an entire ship - and its crew. Part of the crew, part of the ship... Tihihi -H Accept: Nice. - MC1 Accept: ...omg. Rally. This is both horrifying and wonderful. Accept: Accept: Very nice, it was fun to read. Edited December 27, 2013 by Rally Vincent Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 Davy Jones' Locker Room Talk (male s2 Red-Finned Tidal hatchling)Tihihi -H Accept: Nice. - MC1 Accept: ...omg. Rally. This is both horrifying and wonderful. Accept: Accept: Very nice, it was fun to read. This hatchling is part of the crew of the Flying Dutchman. Labor conditions aboard are hard and strenuous (the bosun even has a whip!), and every crew member yearns for the centennial shift change. During the off-hours, the crew removes their scary work outfit consisting of sawfish saws, hammerhead heads or pink shellfish and changes into their causal outfits in Davy Jones' Locker Room. It doesn't come as a surprise that sailors have loose mouths - if there is a locker room, there is locker room talk. This hatchling tops them all. He always has the latest and most spicy gossip - whose rapier is bent, who has crabs, and who visited a mermaid in the vicinity of Tortucave and returned with the black spot! Yes, this STD - sailor transmitted destiny - is the worst of them all. Even a single bearer of the Black Spot can doom an entire ship - and its crew. Part of the crew, part of the ship... And no one picked up on the Doctor Who reference? Shame on them! Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 And no one picked up on the Doctor Who reference? Shame on them! Uh... Lagie? I never watched a single episode of Dr. Who... If you see any reference to that, someone who I googled must be a timelord probably has smuggeled it into the description. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 For my vine dragon: Rohp, a play on the word 'rope', is named after his rope like vines. He has a very distinguished signature move in which he will throw out his vines to his victim, wrap them round their body, and slowly drag them in before 'settling his appetite'. It is a cruel and horrible way to hunt, the kind of thing to be dreamed of in a dragon's nightmares. Many dragons spend hours teaching their hatchlings how to spot Rohp. They tell them everything possible to know - his favourite positions to wait in, his favourite hunting spots and his favourite times to hunt. Yet unfortunately, some of them just fail to listen... The comment: Reject: Violent I'm not sure if this comment has a valid point or if it's just a bit scary... Can someone clarify for me though if it is too violent for a 13+ site? Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 For my vine dragon: The comment: I'm not sure if this comment has a valid point or if it's just a bit scary... Can someone clarify for me though if it is too violent for a 13+ site? I don't think it is too violent, we have descriptions about murder and torture (pokes aqueenees/vexen's ices) really it's quite tame Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 I don't think it is too violent, we have descriptions about murder and torture (pokes aqueenees/vexen's ices) really it's quite tame Thanks Share this post Link to post
Posted December 27, 2013 Uh... Lagie? I never watched a single episode of Dr. Who... If you see any reference to that, someone who I googled must be a timelord probably has smuggeled it into the description. Here you go: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Curse_of_the_Black_Spot I agree with brairtrainer, Jascuty. I wouldn't worry too much about one person's opinion. In the end, it's really the mods who decide. Share this post Link to post
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