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Some people seem to think it MUST be a physical description. Someone said something like that about one of mine that's waiting...

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Can someone explain to me how this isn't a description? I can understand where this person is coming from though.

I can't see why it was rejected - aside from what fuzzbucket said. I feel that descriptions should go beyond what the pictures show us anyway and give the dragon a personality or background story instead of confirming that its scales are, indeed, green.

 

I wouldn't have voted "reject" - only maybe wondered to myself (as a non-native speaker of English) whether "bear children" is usable for male beings aside from seahorses. But that might be a problem of translation.

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The only female of her nest-mates, Ameera was definitely not given any special treatment. Not at all. Really, she wasn't. And she is certainly not a spoiled brat...

Reject: Yes she is.

Reject:

Accept:

Accept:

Reject:

Reject:

Accept:

Accept: Love the sarcasm here!

Accept:

Accept:

 

That's the most comments I've ever gotten on a description, and the most rejects.

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Accept: WOW!!! How violent and scary, but it's a good description which is all that matters.

 

Thank you. happy.gif

You're welcome.

 

Some people seem to think it MUST be a physical description. Someone said something like that about one of mine that's waiting...

 

AH. Good point.

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I wouldn't have voted "reject" - only maybe wondered to myself (as a non-native speaker of English) whether "bear children" is usable for male beings aside from seahorses. But that might be a problem of translation.

Hmm... Good point. I think "sired" would be a better term to use for a guy dragon. That or simply state he wishes to have children. "To bear children" is usually used only for females.

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That's the most comments I've ever gotten on a description, and the most rejects.

Dun worry about the rejects.

I had one that had more rejects than that (I think it had... 8 or 9?) and it just recently got accepted.

 

All mine got accepted recently, so I don't have many comments to post here.

The only one that DIDN'T get accepted was a day glory pair that one of the day glories was determinedly depressed.

Didn't go over well with the mods because it conflicted with the breed descriptions.

So there's one more I have to rewrite.

*sigh*

 

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On my female Ember:

 

Three of a kind, and yet three divided. Cdnyhka is the middle sibling, and balances both of her sister's extroversion with a responsible brand of calm. Practical in all things, she focuses on details her wilder sisters overlook and reigns in their passion with cooler thoughts. She is much more shy, true to type, but will just as adamantly protect whatever she holds dear. When danger nears, she is the first to assess and suggest the best course of action.

 

The comment:

 

Reject: Hmm, I dont think this dragon is "true to type" Ember dragons are usually more ferocious, and I definitely wouldn't call any of them cool, or practical.

 

Breed description:

 

Ember dragons have a great affinity for hot environments. While they themselves are not hot to the touch, their tendency to lurk amongst smoldering ashes has caused many to believe they are fire-starters. Their dully glowing markings serve many purposes: acting as a means of identification between individuals, as an important part of mating displays, and as a way of showing aggression. The long, low build of the breed makes them ungainly in flight, and the thick fleshy membranes of their wings hinder them further. As such, it is rare to see an ember dragon take to the air. Ember dragons are also not particularly sociable; females tend to be defensive, whereas males are more aggressive. Once they have settled with a particular group of dragons, ember dragons are incredibly loyal and will defend their pack by any means possible.

 

Ferocious? I think not. The only time aggressive language is used is at the markings and describing the males, but it clearly says they're "defensive" and "not particularly sociable". Soooo whatcha doing, commenter?

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Looks like someone doesn't read the official description.

 

Spot the cerebrus dragoner is a kind, and loving dragon that loves hatchlings, and eggs. She even started her own daycare to help out any dragon, but for a price. They have to agree to never harm her hatchlings and eggs, and they have to bring her something to eat. So far she hasn't gotten any problems.

 

Accept: Cute. :3

 

Thanks.

 

May the dragoon consume you is part of the Army of Darkness. She is a formidable enemy that wants to conquer the cave. She's also extremely aggressive and won't stop when she attacks. Her accuracy is quite bad though and if she's not within a couple feet of anything she can, and probably will, miss. She can attack with her claws and fireballs.

 

Abstain: Ok.

Accept:

Accept:

 

And why the abstain? I'm not understanding.

 

Moonlight madness dragoner was the former leader of the Army of darkness. She has gone on a journey to look for her mate who was sealed in a cave months earlier. She quickly finds the cave but it's guarded so she has to wait until a full moon appears which is in three more days then "it" will come. What is "it" You don't want to know.

 

Accept:

Accept: Awesome!

Accept:

Accept:

 

Thanks person.

 

ETAIN is the self-proclaimed leader of the Army of Darkness. In reality, though, they have no leader and the others don't like her. She is stronger and faster then the others, but she expects to be pampered every time she wins a fight, and she hunts half the time. She has threatened to leave many times but never does.

 

Abstain: Work on repetition and might want to add more to her story. Great start though!

 

Repetition? I see nothing repeated except she. ((i don't get people sometimes.))

 

Serpentile dragoon is named this because she can hit an unsuspecting victim with deadly, and powerful accuracy. She enjoys being above her target when she attacks, and many times has killed her target from a proper angle. She is also a member of the Army of Darkness.

 

Accept: There's nothing quite like 'Angle' killing. Nothing. tongue.gif

Abstain: The "proper angle" part is a bit confusing. I can't tell what you mean by that.

 

What i mean is in the description. She flies above an enemy and does a divebomb type attack. How should i know what the......angle......is? ((I have a bad feeling about that. *sigh*))

 

Mithos the fallen dragoner was once a hero to the other Gray dragons in the cave. He could fly circles around other gray dragons like it's nothing, and would save his kin from any person or dragon. Unfortunately he has fallen. The hero of the Gray dragons has disappeared and only one other dragon knows where he is. He has been called "the fallen" because in this particular cave if you abandon your family you're considered useless, or fallen.

 

Accept: More of a story than a description..

Accept:

Accept:

 

It is.

 

Two dragons, one oath. Kid darkness dragoon was never a nice hatchling to begin with, but after her ordeal with the caves hero she turned evil. The kid hates adults and wants nothing to do with them so when the "hero" said he was going to abandon the tribe and cave she knew that she didn't want to become an adult. That's why she's the only hatchling in the cave.

 

Abstain: A little confusing. Maybe explain more about this 'ordeal'?

 

I would but then it would ruin my other description. wink.gif

 

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I can see some repetition. The offender is the word "time" in the last two sentences, and, to a lesser extent, the word "others", which repeats twice in short succession. You also have a typo on "then" (should be "than"). wink.gif

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Serpentile dragoon is named this because she can hit an unsuspecting victim with deadly, and powerful accuracy. She enjoys being above her target when she attacks, and many times has killed her target from a proper angle. She is also a member of the Army of Darkness.

Accept: There's nothing quite like 'Angle' killing. Nothing. tongue.gif

 

Sorry, I was feeling in a silly mood that evening. tongue.gif

Perhaps instead of "proper angle" you could put "many times has killed her targets with no more than a single fell swoop"?

I think that's more or less what you were going for. Unless you're going to specify the angle, or have a dragon that's particularly obsessed with math (which gives me an idea for a description actually), it's not really necessary to mention the "angle" bit.

 

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P-E-T-A, otherwise referred to as People For the Ethical Treatment of Air. He firmly believes that there are people and dragons in this world that are using air in a inappropriate and abusive manner by forcing it to enter into their disgustingly oxygen-saturated bodies to fuel their own repulsive habits (otherwise known as breathing).

It just makes him so angry to see people needlessly abusing air that he just can't control himself. Needless to say, he dumped his vegetarian diet ages ago; he's considered a cannibal by many dragons and a villain to many humans.

 

    * Accept:

    * Accept: !!!??? That was NOT what I was expecting. I like it though.

 

xd.png

This comment totally cracked me up when I saw it.

 

 

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Firststrike likes

pike

has no

tykes

and eats

bikes!

 

A rhyme I saw while reviewing. I dunno whether to laugh or cry at the falling standards of descriptions.

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A rhyme I saw while reviewing. I dunno whether to laugh or cry at the falling standards of descriptions.

Don't forget - we do have players as young as 9 years old. It is spelt right which is more than I can say for many. biggrin.gif And clearly they took some trouble over it.

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I smiled...then pressed 'Reject'.

 

*not nice at all* I know, but c'mon. I've seen people as old as 15 writing similar to that standard, and that is truly saddening.

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I'm American but I use British spelling for some words just because I think it looks nicer. xd.png

 

As far as commenting goes, I've done more than a few blank accepts. If the description is technically sound and within the guidelines but doesn't do anything for me personally, I'll blank accept it. Not much point in adding a comment when I have nothing to say.

 

I will comment when I come across a description I really like, particularly if it's clever or narrative. Humor's pretty hit and miss but I always appreciate a good turn of phrase or a reference I recognize.

 

I abstain mostly on descriptions that I just can't feel I can accept or reject; usually it's something most people would accept that has minor flaws or grammatical issues. A lot of my abstains are for descriptions that start out strong and inexplicably take a sharp left into WTF land at the end. Also, if I can't figure out what the writer is trying to say, I generally abstain because I can never be sure if it's intentional (read: stylistic) or not.

 

If I reject it's generally for terrible spelling or grammar or blatant disregard for the guidelines. I'll comment on the salvageable ones. I will blank reject things that are a complete mess or someone being deliberately idiotic. I rejected quite a few recently that were literally the breed description cut and pasted into the user description box and submitted.

 

As for my own descriptions, I've had mostly blank accepts and rejects. The accepts I'm fine with, but the rejects always irritate me because there are no obvious reasons for it. I proof every description before I submit, and if I find an error later on I fix and resubmit it immediately.

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Cruelia is a member of the Fang clan; she is currently scheming in an attempt to take over clan leadership. She thinks the current leader Kaegro Nightfang is not cruel or sadistic enough to lead the clan since in her mind the leader of the Fang clan needs to absolutely merciless whenever the one standing in the way is an adult or hatchling or even other another vampire dragon. She enjoys inflicting pain on others more than anything else in the world, the more they scream and beg for mercy then more she enjoys it. Cruelia is blood crazy if she sees blood she sometimes goes into frenzy mode where she won't stop attacking until her victim is silenced, often leaving nothing more than a bloody pulp on the ground of the one dumb enough to stand in her way.

 

Accept: xd.png Killer vampire for the kill.

Accept:

 

That killer vamp comment made my day since i've had a really bad week last week and was still down about it but this one made me lol. I use American english only and no I'm not American I'm not even english that's just what I've learned, i do use spell checker just to be sure there's as few errors as possible when i descripe my dragons.

Edited by vythalax

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On a stormy night, an egg was thrown from Clementine's highest cliff in a burst of rage. Perhaps it was fate that made it hit the only piece of sand on that rocky shore. Despite this luck, the egg was still doomed to die. Alone and cold, it would soon be drowned by the sea if not frozen by the time the tide came in.

Except that by chance, Lord Wampyr was walking along the beach that night. He saw the egg, the unborn hatchling close to death, and in an act of mercy injected it with his venom.

Lady Wampyr was raised alone, with only Lord Wampyr for company. She knows she can never go outside, as the daylight would make her ill and she is unable to conceal herself at night. Lord Wampyr is completely honest with her, even going out of his way to find answers for her questions, and is never unkind to her. She is troubled by the plight of her parents, Shani and Diggory, and by the Clementine-Deirwater conflict, but accepts the fact that neither she nor Lord Wampyr can intervene.

 

Accept: This is a beautifully written description, very well done.

 

 

If whoever wrote that comment is reading this - thank you so much. I usually don't get much more than a nod from family members who read my stories (and then I get neurotic and think they're only saying it's good as a meaningless compliment), so to get that kind of feedback from a complete stranger gave me such a warm feeling. And although it's the only comment so far, it really made my day. smile.gif

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But I own Diggory... and not Shani... so now I wonder who these dragons are. xd.png

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But I own Diggory... and not Shani... so now I wonder who these dragons are. xd.png

@ArynChris: I put a suffix after all my dragons so that I don't have to spend ages typing in name after name after name.

 

Shani of Clementine and Diggory of Clementine both belong to me. smile.gif

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I got my priviledges revoked. Da-da-dum. biggrin.gif

 

Still,

 

The official sorter for DracCave, ScrollKeeper refused to leave his spot on the very top of the scroll when he grew up. After multiple times of coaxing, Dracoon gave up and left ScrolKeeper alone. He takes a head count of every dragon and creature in and out of DracCave, making sure they are all in tip-top condition. Yet, ScrollKeeper never has a mate- he claims he is 'too busy for marital affairs'.

 

•Accept: It's DraGCave. Lol,just kidding. Great description.

•Accept: Adoreable I want a scroll keeper!

•Accept: Hey look, it's Dracoon.

•Accept:

 

What. ohmy.gif

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As you can see, this dragon is quite shiny. In fact, he's widely regarded as the shiniest thing since knives, jewelry, mirrors, and diamonds, which are all very shiny things. He's so shiny he could put an eye out. He's just that ridiculously shiny.

 

    * Accept: I would think that those things wouldn't be back in medevil times, but they could. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

 

Don't see why not. Medieval, contrary to popular opinion, does not mean the dark ages.

None of those things are really recent discoveries. Romans and greeks used to polish brass for mirrors. Knives have debateably been around since the dawn of time.

Diamonds and jewelry... well, people have been making jewelry for a long time, and diamonds are just polished rocks.

*shrug*

 

Yes, I just invented a word.

 

Emo Sunshine spends much of her time hiding from her mate. He often tries to force her to act more normal, which causes her much anguish. So, she hides from him.

This isn't hard for a highly agile little flier. But, it's equally as easy for him to follow, which negates the entire effect.

 

    * Moderator Reject: I'd like to know more about this dragon's personality.

    * Reject:

 

I'm going to redo this pair altogether, I think.

This dragon's personality just isn't describable alongside the breed description.

BLAH.

 

Doughnuts got her name because of the prank she was the victim of.

See, recently she was the chosen target of a prank done by a particularly daring young red dragon who was being dared by his peers to approach the sleeping pillow and stuff her snoring mouth with doughnuts.

Since then she's been in love with those delicious pastries, so it has a happy ending at least, even if she does have a silly name because of it.

 

    * Accept: When were donuts made? I don't think they were made in medevil times, but i could be wrong. Good description though.

 

Doughnuts were made by the gods. They're timeless. Made in the beginning of time, and given to humans as one of the single greatest gifts to humanity ever, right above life and fire.

 

They misspelled medieval again. >_<

 

Unlike other seasonals, who stupidly view the leaves, flowers, and snowflakes levitating about them as a completely normal phenomenon, this dragon takes the opposite extreme.

She thinks they're spies. Not just any spies, mind you, but alien spies. She's thoroughly convinced they're using her as a method to get the information they need for a full scale invasion of the world.

 

    * Accept: Funny.

 

Why thank you, I'm glad you find amusement in paranoia. Do you laugh at handicapped kids too?

JK. tongue.gif

Thanks.

 

This fantastic dragon loves using wonderful, spiffy, annoying adjectives. She just gets so incredibly giddy over them that she can barely contain her victorious exultation and utterly, complete, terrible glee.

It's rumored that she barely knows what she's saying when she uses adjectives, but you didn't hear that.

 

    * Accept: Me dun and not understand them huge and fancy werds. Seriously though nice description.

 

Danke.

I love writing descriptions with purposeful grammatical errors. It probably drives sock up walls.

:3

 

I'm sad. No one commented on my Sockie fandragon.

sad.gif

 

Edited by Pink

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Emo Sunshine spends much of her time hiding from her mate. He often tries to force her to act more normal, which causes her much anguish. So, she hides from him.

This isn't hard for a highly agile little flier. But, it's equally as easy for him to follow, which negates the entire effect.

 

I am the one that rejected this description. *prepares to be pelted with rotten tomatoes*

 

The reason was, it really seemed to talk more about her mate than her. It really only boiled down to "She hides from her mate." In what regard does he expect her to be more normal? What does she do that bugs him?

 

To me, the description really lacked information about her specifically.

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I am the one that rejected this description. *prepares to be pelted with rotten tomatoes*

 

The reason was, it really seemed to talk more about her mate than her. It really only boiled down to "She hides from her mate." In what regard does he expect her to be more normal? What does she do that bugs him?

 

To me, the description really lacked information about her specifically.

Nah. I understand why it was rejected.

But like I said, I'm at a loss with those two.

 

I'll have to think about it some more. I'm sure there's some aspects of her personality I can put up there, perhaps with vague allusions to her breed-contrary traits, without going against the breed description entirely.

 

I need to make a dragon that pelts everyone with rotten tomatoes now.

tongue.gif

 

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Herbert West showed great promise as a healer, his skills and magical adeptness quickly surpassing those of his tutors. However, at some point he became obsessed with his inability to raise the dead. Believing that there is no "spirit" and that all bodily functions are strictly biological and mechanical, he turned to science to find a way to restore biological function to a dead body. Shunned by other dragons for his increasingly morbid obsession with reanimation, he experimented alone, injecting strange concoctions into dead bodies in an attempt to bring them back to life. He dabbled in strange books, stalked graveyards for fresh bodies - for only the freshest could have any hope of being revived with normal brain function - and locked himself into his subterranean grotto, where the cool airs from beneath the earth's surface kept specimens preserved. No other dragons know whether he has succeeded, though at times there are claims of strange unnatural voices from deep underground.

* Accept: VERY impressive and literal. I love it.

* Abstain: Too long

 

995... or did I miscount?

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herbert_West < for those of you unfamiliar with Lovecraft.

 

As for stuff I've rated, I found a description for a gold dragon begging for metallics. Reject with the one-word comment "No."

Edited by RheaZen

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For Lampent:

This malevolent Vampire has developed a stunning resistance to fire on her tail through many months of constantly engulfing it in flames. This allows her to, with aid from a fire-breathing dragon, set it alight and not feel pain from it. Lampent, instead of putting this to good use like some dragons would do, instead has a rather twisted, maniacal sense of humour and uses it to attract lost hatchlings, who believe that they're being lead home but instead Lampent lures them to their doom.

Emerald does not know of these 'amusements', and Lampent has plans in case she ever finds out...

User Comments

 

    Accept:

    Accept: MWHUHOHAHAHA!!!

    Accept:

 

Whoever submitted the second comment, thank you for making me lol~

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