Grammar, Spelling, and Fonts

[LadyNightshade]

Nah, my grammar is actually pretty atrocious.

 

However, I'm smart enough to find someone awesome at grammar to edit and proofread anything of any importance (e.g., appeal statements, school papers, and any kind of recreational writing).

 

 

I also have the magical spell-check built into Firefox. It's a lifesaver.

 

 

 

Again, I look at grammar situational. If I'm running out of room on a 160 character text, I'm going to use poor grammar to get the point across. If I'm hurrying a message out on a forum, I'm probably going to use acceptable grammar (acceptable being a "C" or a "B" in the terms of a school grading system). If I have to write a short answer, paragraph, or am trying to get a point across on a forum then I will try my hardest to use my best grammar (and, as I stated, if I have the time I'll have someone else proof it for me because my thoughts tend to fragment or run-on and thus I write and even sometimes speak in fragments and run-on sentences as I did now).

Edited February 17, 2010 by Lady_Nightfox

[Hells_Deity]

I try to make my sentences legible. I hardly abbreviate either. I don't use "leetspeak" either.

[TheWhiteStag]

You cannot begin an independent clause with a coordinating conjunction

 

Yet Shakespeare disagrees with you.

[BlacFyre]

I nitpick like no tomorrow yet, online, my spelling and grammar are atrocious, I'm ashamed to say.

 

@TheWhiteStag: That's Shakespeare. Not us.

[RubyRed74]

Actually, the supposed reason behind this new phenominon is that correcting their spelling/chatspeak is 'emotionally damaging' to a developing mind.

Phenomenon is spelled incorrectly. It should be phenomenon, not phemoninon. There's no i in phenomenon.

 

I use the Oxford comma, and I frequently nitpick my friends' words and writings. The only time I'll ever nitpick here on the Dragon Cave Forum is in this topic, most likely. A few of my friends have spelling issues with what they write, so I am usually their form of spell check when they write. I usually only use chatspeak while chatting with my friends, since we chat at a rapid pace.

Edited February 17, 2010 by RubyRed74

[nephewjack]

*looks in awe and wonder at grammar gods/goddesses*

 

EDIT: Who invented grammar? o__o

EDIT2: Actually, why name it "grammar"?

They named it "grammar" so those who actually use good grammar and spelling can rage at those who spell it "grammer." IF YOU'RE GOING TO CORRECT SOMEONE, SPELL THINGS RIGHT. Those filthy hypocrites on Facebook annoy me so much.

[The_lioness33]

You cannot begin an independent clause with a coordinating conjunction, or have two coordinating conjunctions in the same sentence. That sentence should read, "I used "paragraph" the first time because I could not think of a better word, and by saying it wasn't an entire paragraph I meant that, because it was standalone, it was unnecessary." Still, that sentence is entirely too verbose.

I agree, however, sometimes using a conjunction at the beginning of a sentence/independent clause (we never learnt about them, so please excuse incorrect terminology) adds impact. Or flavour.

 

In fact, fragmented sentences can do the same as well.

 

It's one of those rules that can be bent a little without any 'ohmygosh you broke grammar' protests.

[Pink]

I agree, however, sometimes using a conjunction at the beginning of a sentence/independent clause (we never learnt about them, so please excuse incorrect terminology) adds impact. Or flavour.

 

In fact, fragmented sentences can do the same as well.

 

It's one of those rules that can be bent a little without any 'ohmygosh you broke grammar' protests.

I agree that when used in moderation it can be a useful tool.

 

I remember reading C.S Lewis at one time and realizing that a good number of his sentences were started using coordinating conjunctions.

 

I believe it's perfectly fine so long as the the sentence itself is not a fragment.

If it is, then well, it no longer matters all that much that you started with a conjunction as the whole sentence is wrong.

 

I think it may be another one of those rules that isn't exactly universally agreed upon.

Some say yea, and others think it's an appalling example of terrible grammar.

It's all a matter of tastes.

 

 

 

[Khymarea]

I used to be picky about it, but I've met many an intelligent person who doesn't bother with proper punctuation/grammar/spelling. As a result, I now get more annoyed at grammar nazis - usually only the ones who seem to do it in a pathetic attempt to inflate their ego. It reminds me of schoolyard shenanigans and pushing the small kid into the puddle. Other times, I don't bother with it all either way.

 

Reading errors in printed material is another horse entirely. I find errors in printed material very annoying and depending on the printed material I will usually pull out a pen and correct the error.

Edited February 17, 2010 by Khymarea

[Kia_Kalix]

I've found my home! This beautiful, beautiful thread!

 

Yes, I use the Oxford comma. My sentences don't seem to look right without it.

 

THANK GOD. I'm going to be an English teacher. >:3 If a majority of an assignment is in chatspeak, automatic D.

 

I will hammer out a more elaborate policy later.

 

You...

 

I'm going to be an English teacher too!

 

And I'll be damned if I'll let the students use chatspeak, poor spelling, and incorrect grammar. 'Communication' is no excuse for poor English. In fact, poor English is often a hindrance to communication.

 

 

Nothing wrong with using 'lol', 'wtf', and other such abbreviations, but if you try to use them in an essay, I will kill you.

 

...and you are now my buddies I'm am going to college this fall to be a High School English teacher, and will minor in Creative Writing. What level of English will you be teaching?

 

Speaking of homophones: http://www.bifroest.demon.co.uk/misc/homophones-list.html

 

And I cannot believe in this thread of all things, no one has of yet managed to post the most famous, ridiculous piece of awful grammar and spelling to be known on the internet

So here we go: read at your own risk, with the possibility of losing many, many braincells and wanting to kill the author out of sheer stupidity.

You have been warned

 

Edit: Oh, and thanks for the Styles of Elements online version! Automatically in my favourites now for leater reading. :3

 

I have a pretty set list of ideas for when I become a teacher and how to fix the large portion of disfunctional chatspeak teens. If anyone is willing to chat about them, I'll even make a Chatzy room

Edited February 17, 2010 by Kia_Kalix

[The_lioness33]

...and you are now my buddies I'm am going to college this fall to be a High School English teacher, and will minor in Creative Writing. What level of English will you be teaching?

 

And I cannot believe in this thread of all things, no one has of yet managed to post the most famous, ridiculous piece of awful grammar and spelling to be known on the internet

So here we go: read at your own risk, with the possibility of losing many, many braincells and wanting to kill the author out of sheer stupidity.

You have been warned

 

 

I have a pretty set list of ideas for when I become a teacher and how to fix the large portion of disfunctional chatspeak teens. If anyone is willing to chat about them, I'll even make a Chatzy room

Hopefully high school or university level English, so I can analyse the heck out of good books, and thus gain more enjoyment. And they have no excuse to not know grammar, so I shall make them use it.

 

That...that vampire/goth thing. I'm both dying of laughter and crying in despair. Because it sucks so badly that it's hilarious. Almost.

 

And dysfunctional chatspeak teens...well...hmm:

 

'I'm not disputing your right to express yourself however you want in your essays, whether that be chatspeak or Shakespearian prose. However, if I can't read it, if it doesn't make sense, and if it uses unnecessary abbreviations (lol, whteva, et. al) you will get marked down. Significantly.

 

You have been forewarned'

 

That should do the trick. Note: I also count standard abbreviations such as 'don't, shouldn't, etc.' as unnecessary contractions, because it's an essay. Use them in your creative writing. Use them in your oral presentations. But don't use them in an essay.

Because I'm pedantic like that.

 

Oh, and for lols: This facebook group. fail

 

But it's OK, because the earrings effect your education. I think they should get better earrings...see if it effects a better education for them.

[RheaZen]

D: NOT MY IMMORTAL! Warn us next time pl0x. Hurts my eyes.

 

Horrible Story, MST'd

 

Just... so fun.

[NixAyum]

...and you are now my buddies I'm am going to college this fall to be a High School English teacher, and will minor in Creative Writing. What level of English will you be teaching?

/glomp

 

High School. I should pick a minor or specialty in something.

 

I read some wiki on My Immortal, and now I'm dreadfully curious to read the actual thing. I accept the fact that there will be brain bleach required and I will lose some valiant brain cells in the process, but I am a terribly curious girl. X3

 

@lioness: I somewhat agree on that policy. But no chatspeak, especially in papers. Proper English or GTFO.

[Lagie]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - edited

 

Superheroes vs. Enemies

 

Xanthe, Kiran, and I were walking home from school. Xanthe has powers. One is that she can teleport to anywere. She has Jean Grey's power. She can read minds and tell people what to do. Kiran has ice power. He can freeze people. He has lasers coming from his eyes and can fly. I can telepot, fly, and can read people's minds, and I have claws coming from my hand. We saw enemies like robbers. Kiran froze them. I unfroze them. I teleported into space and took them there. I counted from five to one and they were falling and landed on a plane. Xanthe set them on fire. They had to go to the hospital. We saw one plane come with many people but they were robbers. So I set the plane on fire and I controlled the plane out into space, and we never heard of them again.

 

The End

 

[They were told they weren't allowed to kill anyone in the story. The robbers kind of don't die, but the assumption is that they will die in space after the story ends.]

 

Edit ~ oh shoot ~ I meant to leave the original up and post the edited later. Instead, I edited the original. Ah, well.

Edited February 17, 2010 by Lagie

[Pink]

Oh God, that was a pain to read.

:X

 

I've read my immortal before, and man, it was very interesting.

I was in tears laughing about half the time and in tears crying the other half (it was just THAT bad).

 

I'm in the process of reading the eye of Argon.

It's pretty hilarious.

Edited February 17, 2010 by Pink

[NixAyum]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - unedited

 

(snip)

...what?

 

[soupnazi]

I agree, however, sometimes using a conjunction at the beginning of a sentence/independent clause (we never learnt about them, so please excuse incorrect terminology) adds impact. Or flavour.

Yeah... See, that's when I start to stop paying attention, because I never really learned what clauses are, I just know what's right.

[LadyNightshade]

You have been warned

You have effectively made my eyes bleed.

 

In reality, they did water up after reading the first... not sure what to call it (I will attempt to call it a paragraph).

 

It's kind of like a car accident; You know you shouldn't look because it's going to be bloody and horrific, but you end up practically setting up bleachers to watch (or in this case read).

Edited February 17, 2010 by Lady_Nightfox

[The_lioness33]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - edited

 

Superheroes vs. Enemies

 

Xanthe, Kiran, and I were walking home from school. Xanthe has powers. One is that she can teleport to anywere. She has Jean Grey's power. She can read minds and tell people what to do. Kiran has ice power. He can freeze people. He has lasers coming from his eyes and can fly. I can telepot, fly, and can read people's minds, and I have claws coming from my hand. We saw enemies like robbers. Kiran froze them. I unfroze them. I teleported into space and took them there. I counted from five to one and they were falling and landed on a plane. Xanthe set them on fire. They had to go to the hospital. We saw one plane come with many people but they were robbers. So I set the plane on fire and I controlled the plane out into space, and we never heard of them again.

 

The End

 

[They were told they weren't allowed to kill anyone in the story. The robbers kind of don't die, but the assumption is that they will die in space after the story ends.]

 

Edit ~ oh shoot ~ I meant to leave the original up and post the edited later. Instead, I edited the original. Ah, well.

It's not bad for a 9 year old. Then again, I may be biased, because I suck at stories.

 

Was there a word limit or length requirement, or anything?

 

Also, at one point she telepots.

[Pink]

 

Also, at one point she telepots.

She pots something with her mind?

Odd. Very, very odd.

 

[Qwackie]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - edited

 

Superheroes vs. Enemies

 

Xanthe, Kiran, and I were walking home from school. Xanthe has powers. One is that she can teleport to anywere. She has Jean Grey's power. She can read minds and tell people what to do. Kiran has ice power. He can freeze people. He has lasers coming from his eyes and can fly. I can telepot, fly, and can read people's minds, and I have claws coming from my hand. We saw enemies like robbers. Kiran froze them. I unfroze them. I teleported into space and took them there. I counted from five to one and they were falling and landed on a plane. Xanthe set them on fire. They had to go to the hospital. We saw one plane come with many people but they were robbers. So I set the plane on fire and I controlled the plane out into space, and we never heard of them again.

 

The End

 

[They were told they weren't allowed to kill anyone in the story. The robbers kind of don't die, but the assumption is that they will die in space after the story ends.]

 

Edit ~ oh shoot ~ I meant to leave the original up and post the edited later. Instead, I edited the original. Ah, well.

OH OH OH.

I had that prompt this year.

It was boring because I wasn't allowed to describe bloody gorey-ness.

:C

The kid who wrote that made himself a Mary Sue, lol.

Edited February 17, 2010 by Qwackie

[CYDA LUVA83]

That story looks very short and bad for a child that age

[Kei To Everything]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - edited

 

Superheroes vs. Enemies

 

Xanthe, Kiran, and I were walking home from school. Xanthe has powers. One is that she can teleport to anywere. She has Jean Grey's power. She can read minds and tell people what to do. Kiran has ice power. He can freeze people. He has lasers coming from his eyes and can fly. I can telepot, fly, and can read people's minds, and I have claws coming from my hand. We saw enemies like robbers. Kiran froze them. I unfroze them. I teleported into space and took them there. I counted from five to one and they were falling and landed on a plane. Xanthe set them on fire. They had to go to the hospital. We saw one plane come with many people but they were robbers. So I set the plane on fire and I controlled the plane out into space, and we never heard of them again.

 

The End

 

[They were told they weren't allowed to kill anyone in the story. The robbers kind of don't die, but the assumption is that they will die in space after the story ends.]

 

Edit ~ oh shoot ~ I meant to leave the original up and post the edited later. Instead, I edited the original. Ah, well.

Is this uh... the whole thing the kid wrote for the prompt?

[Qwackie]

That story looks very short and bad for a child that age

Well...

Actually it's average for their age. We, of course, are extra speshul so we got to go to Magnet school.

It's not that bad.

My class was looking over prompts from other people the other day, (I'm a fifth grader, K?) and we looked at this one and it was the super hero prompt. Dx

i woke up super hero i have power i freeze people kill them to i do yes i do.

;D

[RheaZen]

Creative Writing Assignment by SR, one of my students, gr 4, 9 years old - edited

 

Superheroes vs. Enemies

 

Xanthe, Kiran, and I were walking home from school. Xanthe has powers. One is that she can teleport to anywere. She has Jean Grey's power. She can read minds and tell people what to do. Kiran has ice power. He can freeze people. He has lasers coming from his eyes and can fly. I can telepot, fly, and can read people's minds, and I have claws coming from my hand. We saw enemies like robbers. Kiran froze them. I unfroze them. I teleported into space and took them there. I counted from five to one and they were falling and landed on a plane. Xanthe set them on fire. They had to go to the hospital. We saw one plane come with many people but they were robbers. So I set the plane on fire and I controlled the plane out into space, and we never heard of them again.

 

The End

 

[They were told they weren't allowed to kill anyone in the story. The robbers kind of don't die, but the assumption is that they will die in space after the story ends.]

 

Edit ~ oh shoot ~ I meant to leave the original up and post the edited later. Instead, I edited the original. Ah, well.

Sorry Lagie, but you might want to pressure your students a bit more. It's very... basic. To put it lightly.

 

This is from when I was 12: (unedited, straight from the document)

 

Victoria Wong

10-10-05

Report # 1- Persuasive

Why space exploration's nothing but a load of

 

Why is the human race so interested in shooting off people in giant rocket ships to the moon and sending probes and satellites to the far - off planets?!  I mean, like, the satellites used for monitoring Earth are okay, but do we really need to know about planets and our moon? We could be spending our time doing something worthwhile instead of building rocket ships.

 

Billions of dollars. It sounds like not a lot, but it is. Think about it reaalllllll hard. One billion dollars. $1,000,000,000.  We spend hal f a billion dollars to launch a single space shuttle, and $25 million a ton to send a good satellite up. There are cheaper satellites, that cost “only” $3 - 6 million a ton, but they are less reliable.  Either way they can fail, and if they do, *poof*, our money down the drain. In my eyes, space exploration's just a load of .  Billions of dollars to send people into space and satellites and probes to far - off planets?  Why not invest in cotton candy toothpicks or a submarine made entirely out of purple jellybeans? They're just as useless but at least they're edible.

 

Besides being extremely, absurdly, INSANELY expensive, it's also dangerous for the both the people who ride the shuttle and for the people building it.* While building shuttles and satellites, it's quite possible to  be crushed by heavy machinery, considering all the stuff they have in those huge shuttle-building buildings.  And besides that, there are two incidents of shuttle crashes. Two more than was ever needed. First, on January 28, 1986, the Challenger shuttle tore apart. 17 years later, on February 1, 2003, the Columbia blew apart. Both times seven people were killed**. That's 14 too many people killed than necessary.  We could have prevented the loss of those lives by not attempting space exploration.  I mean, really.  If we're so interested in space, you should still wait until you have a working shuttle, not just building shuttles haphazardly and blasting them off.

 

Over studying them makes the planets and stars less mysterious, wonderful and fun, because I’m quite sure one day that I will look up to the stars and planets and wish to have something to puzzle about, and not have to instantly know that “Oh, that planet is nothing but a big ball of condensing gases.” or something equally as boring.  It leaves us nothing to wonder about and admire. You say “Wouldn’t it be cool to live on the moon?”, then your friend tells you no, because you’d die from the lack of oxygen and how you would explode from the lack of atmospheric pressure, or something.  It's just so maddening that I can't have any fun imagining stuff like space colonies without having to take into account the lack of air to breath and poisonous chemicals and all that whatnot.

*Alright, so I don't really care about how many people or who dies because we're so overpopulated, but in a real report I wouldn't put that in, so I'm not including this in my "real" report.

**They could have voted to NOT go and save their lives, too.  But, hey, I'm just some snotty 12 year old brat writing a report. What do I know?

 

Fourthly in this supposedly 5 page long essay is that we could use the money that is usually spent on making these rocket ships and use it for something else.  Just a few examples are: we could fund the study of diseases and use the information we get from that to find cures for different diseases; we could use the money to improve our current technology, such as making more energy efficient cars/ electronic games/ cell phones/ etc.; we could use it to improve the education of children on this planet, and we could use the money to improve the living condition of poor people and feed hungry people.

 

Also, all the people that work on the shuttle - engineers, scientists, the actual builders, heck, even the custodians count, can be used (or rather, can work) for something useful. The smart people can do, uh, smart people things such as designing better refrigerators and whatnot, and the slightly - less - smart people can, uh, do grunt work stuff, like working at construction sites.

 

Second - to - last is how we should take care of all the problems on our planet first.  So far we've got a hole in the ozone layer, global warming, heavy pollution, radiation, disease epidemics, starvation, overpopulation, many animal species losing precious territory to us and therefore dying off, we're sucking all of our natural resources dry, and war.  All this going on right underneath our noses, and we aren't doing anything about it!  Instead of fixing up this planet that we've abused and taken over, we instead send shuttles, satellites and probes into deep space, and are attempting to design space colony things so we can live on planets far away. Let's at least clean Earth up before we mess up the other planets, too.

 

Lastly, we don't even know everything about our planet. If we study our planet instead of space, we could learn a lot of stuff that would save us from a lot of trouble in the future.  Fantasy invention - harnessing power from the heat from volcanoes. It might not have been a fantasy if we had studied Earth more. Besides, if we bide our tome and wait until we have more advanced technology,. then in the future, when we actually launch a shuttle, we'd have a higher chance of making successful launch or maybe a more efficient shuttle, but noooooo! Its rushrushrush to build half- functional things that break! Patience, people!

 

So, yeah! Overall we're a bunch of idiots who want to go hundreds of miles into the void of space, risking their lives for glory and spending billions to go to the Moon and send satellites and probes to the other planets while our own planet is being destroyed beneath our very eyes. Truly the human race is wise beyond comprehending! *NOT*.