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Starscream

Funny Customer Service or Co-worker Questions

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Hopefully this is an original idea. As a cook we get some things that make you say "why did you even ask that"

 

There are times when logic seems to escape people

 

 

 

So a couple I shall share:

 

This is likely a Guest Question - a server should have been able to have answered if she took a moment to let it sink in.

 

"Do Butter tarts have Dairy in it?" I just stare at the server realising she is not as bright as I thought. I mean unless I am mistaken butter comes from cows (usually). if its not made from milk, then its probably margarine. They aren't called Margarine Tarts.

 

To which I reply "what do you think?" The rest of the line picks up and starts giggling because the absurdity of it.

 

 

A coworker to me wondering if a Guest can have mayo on a sandwich because the guest indicated that they were lactose intolerant. (I am lactose intolerant) makes me wonder if she (also lactose intolerant) has been avoiding mayo because of some sort of assumption its dairy. I did make an error in my youth where I used mayo instead of sour cream on the grounds it was white. Yeah - don't do that. the results was beyond disgusting.

 

"I don't think they can have mayo, its dairy."

 

"Its eggs and oil, its not dairy."

 

"aren't eggs dairy."

 

"..." Huge facepalm. "They come from chickens not cows. You took culinary school - you SHOULD know this..."

 

 

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As I work as one of the primary register gals at a local restaurant, I get some interesting questions. I also take to-go orders over the phone, as we provide that service. That gets even more interesting.

 

First story:

So, one afternoon I answer the phone to take the first to-go order, and they start to tell me what they want...only they stop and ask me, "what do I want to eat?" And I don't say it to them (as it would be rude), but I'm thinking to myself, "why would I know what you want to eat??!?" So after a moment of them being unresponsive I'm like "well, I--I don't know." And then they ask me if this specific order is what they want. I just say "yes." xd.png

 

Second story:

A gentleman calls to order some of our homemade pizza, and tells me he wants the toppings "one half hamburger, one half pepperoni." I even double-check with him and he agrees on it. After getting his order down, I ask our pizza guy how long it should take. When I get back on the phone to tell the customer, he interrupts me saying, "I heard you say hamburger on one half, and pepperoni on the other half. I don't want half-and-half. I just want the two toppings." And I was like "?????????"

 

user posted image

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I remember one thing at last year. I was waiting in line at McDonald and people in front me ordered like this.

"Bacon tomato deluxe set please. With no bacon."

It seems that they serviced that order but I still can't forget that order. If you don't like bacon, why would you order the one that has bacon in its name?

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A co-worker asked me once if I had a dad?

I thought the question was a bit...uhh..I don't know, out of place? My personal life is, well, personal after all. We weren't that close and the question could have been structured in a less intrusive manner. I just said: Well, how do you think I was born? It stunned her for a few seconds before she continued to laugh, albeit nervously.

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While working at a pet store during Christmas time about five years ago, I overheard an adult woman ask another associate "Do canaries need water?"

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At a sandwich shop, I ordered a chicken carbonara sandwich for my son. I told the maker "Nothing but the meats, cheese, and sauce."

 

Them- "Do you want the bacon?"

 

Me- "Uh, isn't bacon a meat?"

 

Them- "No, bacon isn't a meat, it's a condiment."

 

huh.gif

 

 

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"Hi um, we were wondering why your quotation for this was -so- high? When we looked at the number we were completely shocked! In fact, it is twice as high as the runner-up. Do you think you could send us a breakdown of this figure? Anyway, we called to let you know that your quotation is in fact the most expensive out of all the ones we have!"

 

(A normal person would just not call and ignored our quotation in favour of a cheaper one if price was their priority)

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I work at a pet store and we have a bucket of duck's feet we sell. A lady was checking out with her husband, looked at them, freaked out and asked,

 

"OMG! Do they actually take those from ducks?" Uhh... *stops*

 

Another time, someone asked where our pig ears we sell were sourced from. Luckily, their friend said the answer we all WANTED to say (but couldn't). "They're sourced from pigs. Lulz*

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I've worked in pharmacy... A place for the most interesing stories.. biggrin.gif

 

This old granpa comes in and asks for "prevention pills" (=contraceptive pills). I was all like blink.gif and asked him for what purpose he used these pills. He answered that the pills prevent the diarrhea. He wanted Lactobacillales...

 

An older lady came in and tells me in a little voice that some one is trying to poison her with cyanide... Again I'm all like blink.gif . Turns out she's been eating vitamin B12 tablets.. vitamin B12 is also called cyanocobalamin..

 

A younger man came in and he had a prescription for slow release pain killers. Usually in Finland these slow release drugs have "re_tard" in the name to indicate the slow release. As this young man knew his English he, as a joke, asked me whether the doctor thought he was retarded.. Me: huh.gif He: cool.gif

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I honestly think I can win on this one.

 

Apparantly, back when I was 18 and did a really short stint in retail, I really, really, really looked like a Lesbian, which I am (and back then I probably did because I had my hair super short, and wore really boyish clothes, it was after my goth phase xd.png), and I don't ever mind being told I look like one, because I don't care.

 

But what I do care is when some 30 year old woman walks in, asks me "you look like a lesbian, so you can probably help me pick out what lingerie a guy would think is sexy on me." or something like that, I can't remember... like seriously though. It doesn't work like that.

 

Obviously, I said no, and tried to keep the disgust out of my voice, but this woman throws a fit, and tells my manager I "refused to sell her lingerie" and that I'd verbally abused her and said she was "sickeningly ugly and unnatractive" and told her to "get out of the store"

 

just... what...?

 

I didn't get fired, cos obviously, the conversation was recorded on camera, but I just quit not long after that, and have never worked since, actually.

 

Mainly cos health problems, both physical and mental, make that difficult for me, but also because I don't like dealing with people... xd.png

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Just finished a shift today (I work at mcdonald's). While I was taking money in the drive-thru, I had THREE people in a very short space of time say that an order was theirs, when it was the person behind's.

UGH.

 

I did ask them if it was their order, they just lied or weren't listening to me.

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I honestly think I can win on this one.

 

Apparantly, back when I was 18 and did a really short stint in retail, I really, really, really looked like a Lesbian, .......

When I was in my early teens (12-13) I bought a lottery ticket at the Christmas fair. I won this tealight glass. The man giving me my winning told me that it's 'perfect gift for a girlfriend'. My mom and sister could barely hold their laughter.

 

Last time I wore all black clothing and a beanie. And I still have that tealight glass... Haven't had a girlfriend to gift it .. laugh.gif

 

 

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I was thinking if I should post in this thread or in this other thread but my experience was more funny than ridiculous, so here it goes.

 

I was dining in a restaurant when a server suggested that I ordered iced tea to go with my meal. I asked what kind it was, wanting to know if it was the kind that was brewed or the kind that came from an instant powder mix. (It is always important for me to know because I avoid consuming very sugary drinks and drinks from powder mixes are practically flavored sugar beverages.) The server looked at me like I asked a really dumb question and replied, "Liquid." laugh.gif I explained politely what I wanted to know and why so he went back to ask the other restaurant employees.

 

I think that it was funny that he answered, "Liquid." tongue.gif

 

On a more serious note, as far as I know, servers must have at least some bits of knowledge on the food and beverages that they serve. This is particularly important for inquiring diners who have allergies or dietary restrictions.

 

 

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On a more serious note, as far as I know, servers must have at least some bits of knowledge on the food and beverages that they serve. This is particularly important for inquiring diners who have allergies or dietary restrictions.

"Bacon is a condiment" wink.gif

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Oh boy, another story from me. And it's another pizza one.

 

A customer calls trying to ask us what size pizzas we have. I tell him. He says "alright." He then asks "what specialty pizzas we do," and I tell him. He proceeds to ask me about the "chicken alfredo" (it's not on our menu, but regulars would in fact know that we can make this, and furthermore, if you know this pizza exists, then you should know our pizzas backwards and forwards). I say "yes, we can do that for you." Thoroughly confused, he asks me again what the pizza sizes are, and I repeat...only to hear him say "b-but--the--the chicken alfredo--what size of pizza does it come in?"

 

You might be thinking, "but Pixel! What if he thinks your specialties are one-size only?" Well, that's not the case for two reasons. Reason number one: NOWHERE on our menu do we state that and it's never been the case. And second of all, I heard him mumbling and trying to explain to me how he "had the menu right here" in front of himself--We have to-go menus, implying he's eaten at our restaurant before--and after all of this ridiculousness, EVEN THOUGH HE HAD THE ANSWERS RIGHT THERE, he could not piece it together. He told me he'd call back. He never did. I don't know what the heck was going on there.

Edited by PixelShark

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So I work in retail at a store that has a jewelry counter and lately I've been scheduled to work in that section of the store a lot.

 

There's this one customer that the jewelry people know named Janet. Not exactly for positive reasons however. She has a really bad shopping habit. Often times she brings in several pieces of jewelry to return. Which is fine, but it takes her forever to find her receipts as she has wads of them in a giant zip-lock bag. And to top it off, she often wants what she returns to be put back on hold for her to come in later and rebuy.

 

Well, I had to attend to Janet today at work. It took her about 20 whole minutes to find her receipts. Meanwhile she's sitting in front of the jewelry register and I'm literally unable to ring other customers out the entire time. Then when I finally get to ringing her return she's also purchasing something, so in the register I processed it in the same transaction. Halfway through she wanted to jump ship on the transaction. I had stared putting her tender in and at that point... You can't cancel a transaction. A manager ended up having to come to the jewelry counter to help.

 

Of course at that time my shift was over and I had to explain to the person taking over what was going on with Janet. I have never had a customer drive me as insane and batty as this lady did today and I felt awful basically dumping her on my coworker who had to figure all this confusing crap out.

 

The whole time she kept asking me about what her total would be and, lucky me without a calculator. *sigh* I had to constantly do it in my head while she debated whether or not to purchase certain things.

Edited by Daydreamer09

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While working at a pet store during Christmas time about five years ago, I overheard an adult woman ask another associate "Do canaries need water?"

Oh nooooooo.

 

I currently work in a pet store, I feel the pain.

 

 

My favorite question is always 'do you work here?' Nah I just really like standing in a uniform with a name tag behind the podium.

 

Then the usual 'what fish can I keep in this bowl?' the answer is no fish, exactly 0 fish.

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I was cashiering at a health foods grocery store and had a lady chatting with me while I was ringing up her organic produce. She mentioned that she doesn't believe in science, and I told her that was a little offensive since I was at the time a college student getting a degree in a scientific field.

 

She reported me to management, told them I was really rude? And they took it seriously? Hopefully now that I've graduated I can get a job where I don't have to deal with that...

Edited by TheCompleteAnimorph

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I had a gentleman call my work to order two large fruit salads for pickup. He asked for our mixed melon salad (which is watermelon, cantaloupe, and honeydew) but asked me to make them without the cantaloupe and honeydew.

 

I asked him if he'd like to just order our fresh watermelon cubes instead, and he got rather upset at my suggestion and insisted that I make the mixed melon salad.

 

I even tried to explain that the watermelon cubes were cheaper, but to no avail. He really wanted his mixed melon salad with just watermelon. rolleyes.gif

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My favorite question is always 'do you work here?' Nah I just really like standing in a uniform with a name tag behind the podium.

Omg, not to mention the age would question, "Are you open?" at Wal-Mart. Nah, I just feel like standing here with my light on and looking pretty.

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One single episode from many from a stint at McDonald's:

I was taking orders at the drive-through in the morning, and getting people to say how much cream and/or/sugar in their coffee or tea was like pulling teeth most of the time. My absolute favorite: "Would you like any cream or sugar in that, sir?"

"Yes." Full stop. Quite normal, but irritating.

"Okay, how much would you like in that today?"

"The usual amount." huh.gif

 

What was I supposed to do with that? Customers (with persistent prompting) ask for anything from one to nine shots of each. At the upper end of that the cup with overflow with sweeteners if we didn't think ahead to not pour much coffee in it (yuck).

Edited by Gryphonic

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Witnessed this exchange at a fast-food place last week:

 

Customer: "I'd like Blah, Blah, Blah, and a cheeseburger without cheese."

 

Worker: "Okay, that's Blah, Blah, Blah, and a cheeseburger, no cheese. Total is $x.xx."

 

(takes payment, assembles tray, hands it over)

 

Customer (brandishing item in hamburger wrapper) "I said a cheeseburger without cheese, not a hamburger! I don't eat pork!"

 

The manager had to come over, calm her down, and explain that despite the name, a hamburger is not made of ham, and is, in fact, a cheeseburger without cheese.

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Ok I have one from today -_- really wanted to face palm

 

So I am the customer, and i'm in a McDonalds in a nearby country but the menu is all in English so its ok, or at least should have been...-_-

 

So they had a expensive menu item I wanted to try out called a ''Premium Chicken'' And it was really big on the menu, big picture and big bold words saying Premium Chicken.

 

So I asked for the premium chicken and the lady just looks at me like ??? and so I point at the giant picture and words that say clearly ''Premium Chicken'' And she still says she does not understand and so calls another co-worker to help, and so I tell her the same thing and point at it on the menu.

 

She smiles and says she understands and I sigh in relief and then she say's ''Is there anything else you want with your McRib?'' ......-_- in my mind I was just like WTF! D:<

 

And I say no! Not a McRib! A Premium Chicken! And FINALLY she understands and I get my premium chicken sandwich x-x

Edited by maylin

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Years ago, when I worked at a pizza place (I was delivery service) a client asked for one of our specialities which is the Four Cheese. The Four Cheese contains blue cheese amongst other types.

 

After the client had received her order she called back claiming we had given her a pizza with MOLD.

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