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Obscure_Trash

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Hello DC Forums... I'm here because I've fallen on hard times and I could use some support.

 

My friend River and I were close, but early December he got in a terrible car accident that killed a four year old, injured the toddler's parents, and landed him in a medically induced coma.

I've been patiently waiting for updates. Hoping surgery will go well, and he'll be awake soon...

But last night I received word that that won't be happening.

They said that his brain is too damaged and that they're going to pull the plug within a few days.

He's only 20, and had so much more to experience in life and I can't believe this is happening.

 

So my advice to all of you: Treat every day like your last, and speak to others as you wish to be spoken to. You never know if tomorrow is the day that you never see the people that you love again.

 

I would like to honor his last wishes by acknowledging the last post he put on facebook. It read:

Remember, Christmas should be a time of love. Keep that in mind.

 

Even if you don't celebrate Christmas, remember to keep love in your hearts during the holiday season. Remember what's important.

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! sad.gif

 

I was going to come here and post about an issue that's really put a gloomy mood on my family for Christmas, but after reading that it made me take a look and realize that we shouldn't take things for granted.

 

Your's friend's post won't be in vain.

 

*Hugs*

Edited by Syiren

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Update: Just found out that my Aunt who has been in a coma since March (due to an embryonic embolism) passed away this morning as well. Needing lots of positive vibes...

 

(I also want to point out that as coincidental and attention seeking as it seems, I swear to you it's all true. This year sucks)

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My grandmother just died and my aunt and uncle have banned my mother, my sister, and I from the funeral because my mother took my grandfather's side during my grandparents' divorce. Forty damn years they've been nursing this grudge only to haul it out now. I'm salty as heck, even though I haven't seen Nana in fifteen years. I don't know if it's me being petty or them.

 

Also, I accidentally did myself a sad - I looked through old RP logs from 2005 and found an unedited log from a friend who killed herself a few years ago. Seeing her voice there, so happy and excited...I miss her more than my grandmother and feel guilty about it.

 

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5 days until my birthday, can't wait to have people I don't like over, a friend who will probably spend the time there facetiming her boyfriend whose gone so far in their relationship as to put that bite sucky thing on her chest(3-4 week relationship mind you) and a driving setup with the little driving school on my birthday and days close to it. On an art site I had a cute wishlist and only one was filled, not like I expected anyone else to bother, nor put me as someone they'd want art from. I'm used to it though, I'm not gonna improve no matter how much.

 

Back to being alone. Whatever else that's negative. Idk anymore.

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-sighs- Guys, I feel terrible. I just snapped at my brother cause he's been out of work since almost August/September due to the flooding in my state. They keep pushing back the reopening of his store and he's gripping about it. Then our mom found a church with adults with disabilities that they have a meeting every Wednesday night, except this week it got pushed back to Sunday. My brother is complaining it'll never work and I finally had enough of his gripping that I snapped at him.

 

Now I feel terrible for it =( I don't know how to cheer him up

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You know what, I'm tired of being the nice guy. I'm no longer going to do my sister any more favors. The amount of abuse I'm suffering because of her is starting to push me to the breaking point. I'm tired of being accused of mooching off of my parents because they are nice enough to let me live with them. I'm tired of her accusing me of 'stealing' money that isn't even HERS(it is my mother's) when I said I was going to pay it back on Friday. I'm tired of her saying I'll be going nowhere in life when I bust my ass off for everything I own and she had everything given to her.

 

I'm done being abused by my sister because she needs to make people suffer for how 'terrible' her life is. She is an abusive, manipulative person and I'm no longer taking it. She needs to get her head out of her dang censorkip.gif and actually get help because there's something obviously wrong with her and she can't see it.

 

I know one thing, when I no longer have to pay for my car I'm looking for somewhere else to go. I'm not going to stay anywhere near her when she treats me like garbage.

Edited by Storm_Dragoon

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You know what, I'm tired of being the nice guy. I'm no longer going to do my sister any more favors. The amount of abuse I'm suffering because of her is starting to push me to the breaking point. I'm tired of being accused of mooching off of my parents because they are nice enough to let me live with them. I'm tired of her accusing me of 'stealing' money that isn't even HERS(it is my mother's) when I said I was going to pay it back on Friday. I'm tired of her saying I'll be going nowhere in life when I bust my ass off for everything I own and she had everything given to her.

 

I'm done being abused by my sister because she needs to make people suffer for how 'terrible' her life is. She is an abusive, manipulative person and I'm no longer taking it. She needs to get her head out of her dang censorkip.gif and actually get help because there's something obviously wrong with her and she can't see it.

 

I know one thing, when I no longer have to pay for my car I'm looking for somewhere else to go. I'm not going to stay anywhere near her when she treats me like garbage.

Coming from someone who's biological father was highly manipulative and my brother dating someone who was abusive and manipulative, moving out is the best thing you can do. Remember that living with your parents is not forever. My oldest brother lived with us until he was 25, he's 26 and moved away. The best thing you can do is talk privately to your parents about her behaviour unless they refuse to listen.

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I'm so fed up. My sister snapped at me for not having a full time job yesterday. She's been really nasty in general lately, and this is just pushing me over the edge. I have a part time job right now. It's not like I don't work at all. But I applied to graduate school. If I get in, I have to move because there's nowhere in state for me to go. To me, it doesn't make sense to apply to a full time job, get started in some company somewhere, and then up and leave before I even have time to get settled. Plus, working part time gave me time to work on the applications. I'm trying to muddle through doing what seems to make sense to me. And besides, getting anywhere worthwhile in my field with just a B.A is difficult. Even with an M.A, options are limited, hence I applied for PhD programs.

 

But a friend was over yesterday, and I'm not thrilled with my current job, and we started censorkip.gif*ing a bit. Because, you know, that's kind of what we do. And then my sister decided she needed to rip my head off and tell me to just go get a full time job. Sorry? Working part time suddenly means I'm not allowed to complain? Even if I wasn't planning on moving, it's not like a full time, salaried position is that easy to come by. And at my part time job, I make significantly more than minimum wage, so giving it up in favor of a full time position at the local supermarket doesn't make sense, because there would be a huge increase in hours, but an almost nonexistent increase in earnings.

 

Plus, it doesn't even effect her. We're both still living at home. And guess what? Even though she does have a full time job and makes a lot more money than me, we both still give our parents the same rent. Plus, since I'm home I do a lot of grocery shopping and I try to cook once a week or so. I don't get reimbursed for groceries often, so I'd estimate that on top of rent, I also spend at least $100 on food. Does my sister ever buy food for the house? Nope. And if my mom's car needs work or something, I'm the one who always gets hit to give rides and stuff. So even though I making less, factoring in grocery shopping, cooking, and other various errands, I contribute to the house more in terms of both money and time. My sister can't even be bothered to replace the shampoo in our bathroom. Either I do it or there's just no shampoo. And when I cook, sometimes I like to cook with beef or pork. My parents and I all eat beef and pork, but my sister only eats poultry. Most of the time, if I make something she won't eat for everyone else, I make a separate dinner for her. When I made a stuffed pork roast, I also stuffed a piece of chicken to cook for her. And then when I made individual beef wellingtons for everyone else, I also made chicken macaroni and cheese so she'd have something. The only time I didn't was when I screwed up the timing and the chicken didn't defrost in time. Do I ever get a "thank you" for it? Nope.

 

And it just frustrates me. I really, really try to be nice to her, and it's never reciprocated. Earlier in the week, some friends wanted to go see a movie. But, my sister was at work and couldn't tell us if she wanted to come or not. Since it was almost sold out, and I didn't want her to get left out if she did want to come, I bought a ticket for her. So I texted her to tell her that we were going to see a movie, I didn't know if she'd want to meet us, but if she did I bought her a ticket. Turns out she didn't want to go. Did she send something saying she was too tired, but thanking me for thinking of her and getting the ticket like a normal human being? Nope. I got a message cursing at me over our choice to go see a movie, and then just saying that she refused to go. And I'm like great. I put out the money to get you a ticket, and instead of a "thank you" I get my head ripped off.

 

I got her a really nice Christmas gift, too. I was originally just going to chip in so my parents could get her tickets to see a show she wanted to go to. But then there was another show featuring her celebrity crush that she didn't know about. So in addition to chipping in for the original tickets, I got her tickets to the other show, too, on top of some other gifts. Meanwhile, she couldn't even be bothered to give me a card or anything. After I gave her presents to her she just goes "Oh. Yeah, I got a Groupon you can use." She didn't even print out the Groupon to put in an envelope or anything. And she knows I'll want to use the Groupon when we can go together, so it's half a present for her, too, because then she doesn't have to pay when we go, and it just felt like I was an afterthought. I don't need anything expensive. But at least a card would have been nice. Just something to make it seem like maybe she'd put some modicum of thought into it.

 

I just feel like I've been really trying to be nice and make her happy, and all I get is either indifference or nastiness. It would be nice if she could make an effort once in a while. Or at least say "thank you" now and again. I'm just sick of investing so much time, energy, and money trying to do nice things for her and then having to deal with her either just ignoring me or snapping at me. The "just get a job" just kind of sent me over the edge. Especially when it's not like my parents are asking her to pick up the slack or anything because I make less, so my work schedule has absolutely zero impact on her life.

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@Storm_Dragoon: On the other hand, I want to advise talking to her and planning out some arrangements for her "favours", however I already knew from your previous post, she can be a bit... unreasonable at times. So, I don't think talking to her nicely would particularly helpful. So technically, I don't know what else to tell you to make you feel better. I'm sorry.

 

sad.gif Sometimes family can be like that. As I already said in the previous post last Christmas, no one should make you feel bad or useless. I think you should take some time off, away from your sister. Kind of difficult when it comes to a family member. No matter how unappreciative family members are, they are ones who are close and will stick to you.

 

@AngesRadieux: I also don't know what to tell you to make you feel better, same as Storm_Dragoon's case.

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Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..

Nobody came to my party again...

Happy birthday to me..sigh.

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Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..

Nobody came to my party again...

Happy birthday to me..sigh.

Your birthday is on the New Year? ohmy.gif That's amazing! Your quote is so sad... unsure.gif Erm... Happy Birthday?

 

May your walls know joy, your room hold happiness and your windows open to great opportunities. This year 2017, I want you to be happy, 'kay? Let's leave the bad behind. Let us hop on a great new adventure! Yes, hop on a new adventure and hope it will be great.

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Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..

Nobody came to my party again...

Happy birthday to me..sigh.

Happy Birthday! I, for one, tend to hate my birthdays. Hardly anyone seems to think of something thoughtful to do for me so I tend to curl up in bed and watch movies. Or buy myself a cake if I feel like I need something to celebrate. Two years ago I joined a track team on that day. My point is, don't feel sad if others fail to live up to your expectations. You're important. Don't let what others do make you feel as though you're not valid. If you want to feel good on your birthday, choose to do so through your own actions smile.gif

 

On another note, I spent New Year's alone. I thought it wouldn't be so bad but it did get to me a little. I am a very angry individual so naturally, that's the emotion I turned to. I was a bit sad too. The family member that was going to spend New Year's with me was going on a trip and I didn't want her to cancel it. Then she didn't even bother to text me to wish a Happy New Year. Ouch. I always say Holidays are regular days, only society being the one to attach value or meaning to them. It's true. But I end up feeling sad anyway so my excuses don't work! I think I'd be less sad if I could actually move around rather than being cooped up at home. I was left with no car, but if I'd had it I would have gone to the movies or to have dinner somewhere nice to distract myself.

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Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..

Nobody came to my party again...

Happy birthday to me..sigh.

Hugs... I'm in between Xmas & New Years. So I know how it is NoraNora you are part of the December Club. I just declared the whole month of December and all it's festivities and traditions my personal B-day party. That's right NoraNora the whole month is about you and that count down is for you!

 

Since the DC game is suppose to be set in Fantasy Middle Ages a Birthday Wish for you:

May you drink from your enemy's skulls!... failing that drink their wine & eat there cheese!

 

 

 

biggrin.gif

Edited by maratrekkan

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I'm also a december birthday, so I totally get how it is, and it can suck. :/ I remember plenty of christmas parties where no one acknowledged it was my birthday, too.

 

Anyway... the reason I'm here., it's kind of confusing, probably, and quite deep.

 

It isn't that I'm unhappy, because I am happy, for the most part. I'm just.. idk. It's hard to explain.

I'm entering into a new year with a whole new life. kind of. I'm a new person.

 

What happened is that.. well, I'll start off by saying I have DID.

And at the beginning of 2016.

We'll call her K..and she was our ANP... but she went bad, she became twisted, paranoid, and cruel, because she was so scared of the hatred she got from paranoia, possibly a side affect of when she started taking drugs...

anyway, during this time, she was extremely rude, and cruel to people, people who were her friends, she pushed them out when they tried to help, and then blamed them, she threatened people and she hurt them..

 

So, I stepped in as the new ANP, and we ..lets say K "died"..she's not around anymore.

Now I'm here but I'm trying to recover old memories that I don't have, since when I took over, a lot from the past year were gone completely... but as I'm doing so, the things I'm hearing, are awful so I'm kind of glad she's gone and I'm in her place. I know she never meant to hurt people, and in the end, I do know she was apologetic for it too. But I think it's better off with her not in control... it's better with her gone.

 

But I'm sad, sorry, and fearful of it.. sad because she..hurt those people, and sorry for it. I don't expect forgiveness, but it's...sad that most wouldn't understand. They'd say it was "me"..even though technically, it was not. I'm afraid of being seen as someone bad, I'm afraid of ending up with the same predicament...that eventually I'll rot away into blackness like she did.

 

So right now, I'm.. happy in my life,a lot of my issues that K had..are gone, but deep down, I'm unsure what to really do, wether I should stick to my medications and therapies, ect. Even though I feel like I wouldn't need them anymore, for the most part, I am calmer, and generally just nicer, not so angry and messed up. But just in case?

I don't want to be this bad person, and I don't believe I am, but it's such a huge fear of it just happening again, to me, instead. Because, I still have the DID of course, that will never change, and with a schizoaffective disorder too, I'm scared the paranoia she had may start again and turn me hateful and cruel. I don't know what will happen, it scares me, and it sucks.

 

I guess that the best thing for me to do is focus on my friends, and of course my fiance... I marry in May, so I guess that's a positive thing to look forward to, but this sort of thing won't stop niggling around in the back of my mind... sad.gif

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So i'm currently going through what's apparently called "Hell's Itch". It's that point after you get a sunburn and the skin is healing.

 

I just spent half an hour scouring the internet, and i've read posts from those who have been drafted in the army and have had shrapnel blasted into them, and they say they'd rather that than this itch. I cannot stop squirming from how badly my back itches, i feel like peeling off an inch of skin just to relieve it.

 

I woke up my mum half an hour ago to ask if she could rub this anti-itch ointment i found, and she did so. It felt really good at first, the itch disappeared and my back felt better. But after no more than a minute, I got the most intense burning pain I have ever experienced, even worse than the actual burn itself. And this is coming from someone who suffers from chronic pain.

 

Turns out the ointment had bloody menthol in it. Note this; menthol stings on raw, sensitive skin. I ran to the shower to wash the ointment off, in so much pain I was shaking and sobbing while furiously wiping my back.

 

So now i'm in bed at 3am, back to squirming from this hellish itch, hoping that an allergy medication of mine will provide some relief so I can sleep. I don't think i'll be going out into the sun for a while. Also, just to say - I did put on sunscreen, and lots of it. I was in the sun for only an hour. The australian sun has no mercy.

 

After that event, i'm gonna gently rub my back against the wall until I either pass out, or this medicine miraculously relieves the itching. Either one would be a blessing, i'm already reeling from my normal medication not working and being unable to feel happy.

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Trickseh keep up with your therapy, it takes a while for changes to become permanent. I have known many people who have started, declared themselves changed... better so they stop therapy too soon, and slide back... it is hard to look at these things, these dark sides of ourselves. Dark memories. We all have fears, things we regret, things we can never "fix" the way we want, but the future deeds we choose, our future way of being is always there to become what we choose, but to do so you must learn how, you must have tools, you must know yourself in whole otherwise you can not move from a place of control only out of control... thought versus instinct... best is to understand both and use together, know when to use which, when to restrain which. Just know you are not alone, that all people no matter how they appear have issues, fears, dark moments, terrible secrets, challenges that seem unbearable... it is easy to forget this, especially when no one speaks of it... often for good reasons. So hugs, stay the course, know you decide who you are, you write your own story... many people in society tell you different, but don't give them that power. But you have to develop tools to write your story the way you want and that involves a bit of work, don't fear the work or the small minded opinions of others.

 

Hugs.

 

Tazzay oh god that is terrible. Have you tried a vinegar bath? I feel for you I 2nd degree burned my self once in the desert, thank god it was not all over. Not fun, I hope it is not as bad as I did...

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I've had 3 first trimester miscarriages and this last one left me feeling sick and weak and I'm grieving but I didn't tell most of my family I was pregnant in case this would happen. It feels like I want to be hugged and comforted but I don't know how to accept words of consolation because as nice as they are, it doesn't feel any different after I hear them. Not sure anything will help. I really had hope this time and then, like, an hour before the new year...

 

help

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I've had 3 first trimester miscarriages and this last one left me feeling sick and weak and I'm grieving but I didn't tell most of my family I was pregnant in case this would happen. It feels like I want to be hugged and comforted but I don't know how to accept words of consolation because as nice as they are, it doesn't feel any different after I hear them. Not sure anything will help. I really had hope this time and then, like, an hour before the new year...

 

help

I'm sorry for your loss... I know to most people that doesn't mean a lot, but I've lost 3 siblings to miscarriage (including my twin).

 

Have you tried using any fertility drugs? That's the only thing I can think of. I don't belong to a specific religious group (so I can't pray), but I have high hopes for you!

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I've had 3 first trimester miscarriages and this last one left me feeling sick and weak and I'm grieving but I didn't tell most of my family I was pregnant in case this would happen. It feels like I want to be hugged and comforted but I don't know how to accept words of consolation because as nice as they are, it doesn't feel any different after I hear them. Not sure anything will help. I really had hope this time and then, like, an hour before the new year...

 

help

Hugs. Know you are loved and supported.

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I feel like I'm falling back into depression once more. It's been years since I recovered from my first time. I don't know what to do since I can't really afford therapy/a psychologist/meds. I don't feel like telling my loved ones either. Everything just seems...darker.

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Just wanted to thank everyone regarding my last post..

Can't talk much since I've been busy..eeghhhh...

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I feel like I'm falling back into depression once more. It's been years since I recovered from my first time. I don't know what to do since I can't really afford therapy/a psychologist/meds. I don't feel like telling my loved ones either. Everything just seems...darker.

Where are you located? Some state universities and mental health hospitals have free or near-free Resident Outpatient Programs that allow you to see psychiatrists in their last year of residency. You get competent, professional care for $5 an hour, they can prescribe meds, and a lot of anti-depressants are on the $4 generic lists. If you're near Baltimore, Maryland, I can give more specific instructions on getting into Sheppard-Pratt's ROP.

 

Don't give up. It's a pain in the ass, but you can find treatment in most places.

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