Emotional Support

[Wandering4Ever]

Hey guys, thank you. Honestly. You really did help me out and actually helped give me the bravery to hit the send button on the email tonight rather than tomorrow. (I decided I really didn't want to deal with the weekend question because it'd've been so flipping awkward)

 

So. Now it's just a waiting game to see if he wants to talk tomorrow or at a later date. I'm hoping i didn't just lose a friend, but i mean. if i did. it happens. right? i didn't do something wrong by staying true to how i feel?

 

it also helps that my mother responded to my email from yesterday and also gave me the "go ahead." not that i needed her permission. but i needed her support. we're basically best friends and since this is my first relationship that she knows about because yay for still being closeted to family i really was worried she'd be all "GURL WTF WHY YOU DO THAT"

but instead she was like "Yo. you're a smart and wonderful lady who knows what she needs and if this isn't it? Then hey. do what you think is right. You've got your life in order so go get 'em"

sometimes i love my mother to pieces e~e

[Omega Entity]

You absolutely did the right thing. Don't question yourself on this one

[LupaWulf]

Great job Wandering!!

 

Sometimes relationships just don't work out. It's always better to be honest and not drag out something you aren't into.

Breakups are hard, but as long as you are honest and true to yourself it helps. Don't let anger from the other person involved bother you, they might be hurt for a while and emotional. Just let it go and let things quiet down. You sound like an awesome person who cares a lot. Stay great!!

[lightningsky]

Okay, hi. First time posting. Just need to get all my anger and sadness out, to random people since I don't have an alternative irl.

 

So first, while leaving work I find out a co-worker didn't know her kitten was in the dryer before she started it. Do not ask me how she did not know. Seriously, I have no idea how anyone could not know but either way I know that a helpless baby kitten has died today - in the worst possible way - burning to death/suffocation and whatever else happens when you're stuck in a dryer. I cried instantly upon hearing the news. It makes me sick that this baby barely begun to live (young kitten) and it's already over because the owner is completely stupid. Can't stop thinking about it...ughhh!! So angry. And sad.

 

Also I didn't win the redraw and since I'm such a loser and had my hopes up, it just made today even more depressing for me. I hate today.

 

/sigh

 

Sorry all. *walks away*

[BlueMint]

Guys can I just have a vitrual hug or something?

 

Ive been soooo stressed with school its not even funny. Keeping grades up, exams/tests that can kill my grade at any moment, applying for scholorships, school every day and then a class on Saturday.... The list goes on!

 

Honestly, I feel like Im having a break down or something. Ive been keeping it in for almost two years.

But this is too much.

Can someone just lie to me and tell me that Ill survive? PLEASE? *sobs*

[Nightwalkerkey]

Oh my goodness, virtual hugs for you lightningsky and that poor baby kitten...

 

Virtual hugs for BlueMint as well, I can say I somewhat know the feeling of those pressures, though at this point I try just to forget it (which probably isn't helping my case). Breathe, you'll make it through x) Give yourself a break sometimes, reward yourself!

 

 

 

In terms of myself, I'm really troubled feeling and hurt and nervous and scared because I have a friend who seriously hurt themselves, but we currently aren't speaking to each other. I found out through another friend. I'm not sure what to do other than panic and stress in silence. Should I grow up and talk to them? Probably.... s:

[Mellwen]

I'm sorry for all of you that are going through hard times right now. *hugs* If any of you are in need of advise/someone to talk to, please feel free to come to me (I may be young, but some people have told me that I have seriously helped them by giving advise).

 

@Nightwalkerkey, I'm not sure what's going on with your friend (if y'all had a fight before or something, and that's why y'all aren't talking), but sometimes it's best to try and get past things that they have said/done to you, and do/say something nice for/to them, because you never know what they might be going through. Who knows? Maybe if you go out there and talk to them, then you might even make their day. And, if you're not sure what to say to them, maybe you can bring cookies or a nice card or something, because nice actions can also speak for themselves. That's just some stuff I've learned from experience, but I'm not sure if it will help in your case (because I'm not sure what's happening with you and your friend). So, I hope that's helpful. And I believe that when the time comes, you'll make the right decision. If you need/want any more advise, feel free to PM me.

[Rhynn Collins]

I am NOT having a good weekend, and it has everything to do with my job. I generally like my job, but this weekend is just... ugh.

 

I work at a call center, taking calls of customers who have a problem with their elevator, after which I send a technician their way. This, of course, means I have a lot of contact with both the customers and the technicians themselves. I work out of office hours, so evenings and weekends. Lately I've been scheduled to work until 23:00 (a.k.a. 11pm), which I'm fine with since I never go to sleep before 1:00 am anyway, and usually later than that.

However, on Saturday I was scheduled to start again at 09:00 am. That's only 10 hours between shifts, in which I have to get home, prepare dinner, eat dinner, sleep, get up, get ready for work, and travel to work again. That's just... not enough.

Still, I did it without complaining too much, stuff like that happens after all. It wouldn't have been so bad, however, if I didn't get all the idiots >_< Usually the vast majority of people is just normal, quickly wanting to call in a defective elevator and maybe expressing their annoyance at it a bit, that's nothing new and to be expected. But I don't think I've ever been yelled at by people for no reason as much in one day as I did Saturday :/

 

That's not the end of it, though. I somehow managed to get through that without yelling back at the customers. Today I'm back at work again, and I just talked to one of the technicians for a very routine thing. However, at the end of the call the line remained open for a bit longer than I intended, because I got distracted by something else work-related. I have no idea if the technician knew the line was still open... but he said 'Rhynn, you sound so horny/hot' (the word he used in my language can mean either of those, but either way it has a sexual meaning).

I really, really hope I misheard him there. I sent a mail to my supervisor asking her to listen back to the call (everything is recorded) to see if I did indeed hear what I thought I heard. I won't know the answer until at least wednesday though, since she doesn't work during the weekend and I've got my weekend on monday and tuesday :/

And if I did hear it right, I just don't even know what to do. I'm definitely not comfortable ever talking to the guy again but I don't know how possible that is >_<

 

I mean... I'm not naive enough to think he's the only one who might think such things; I'm a young woman and have the voice to match it, and none of them have ever seen my face so who knows what they're imagining to go along with the voice. But there's a HUGE difference between knowing they probably have those types of thoughts, and actively hearing them say it to me. I just feel violated somehow :/

Edited February 8, 2015 by Rhynn Collins

[MedievalMystic]

'Rhynn, you sound so horny/hot'

 

Rhynn, I'm sorry, really...but I had to laugh. I couldn't help myself. My response had I heard that? 'You're damn right I do'. I would definitely have taken that as a compliment and had fun with it. Would you rather he had said 'Rhynn, you sound like Bart's aunt on the Simpsons'? Or 'Rhynn, you sound like a 3 pack a day old hag'?

 

Anyway, I'm sorry you're upset. As for what to do...nothing. Forget it. What else? It's not like the guy is going to get in much trouble for making a comment about some chick sounding hot. *shrug* As for what they're imagining, who cares? It's not like you can stop a guy from thinking. As long as they don't get descriptive and start telling you about details, shrug it off as a normal guy thing.

Edited February 8, 2015 by MedievalMystic

[lady_caetlyn]

@blue mint (((((HUGS))))) and lots of them!

 

@lightningsky - that is very sad (((((HUGS)))))

 

@Rhynn - I agree with Mystic. Laugh it off...If it keeps going or if the tech guy starts coming onto you or other things, it could be considered harassment.

 

@Nightwalkerkey - ((((HUGS)))) for you as well. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Is there any way to be able to speak to your friend?

 

((((HUGS)))) To everyone else just because.

 

I'm feeling a bit on the melancholy side; everything feels a bit surreal right now, and I've got a lot of emotions going through me right now.

[MedievalMystic]

If it keeps going or if the tech guy starts coming onto you or other things, it could be considered harassment.

 

Yes.

 

 

I'm feeling a bit on the melancholy side; everything feels a bit surreal right now, and I've got a lot of emotions going through me right now.

 

I know the feeling and you're not alone. Hope the day gets better.

Edited February 8, 2015 by MedievalMystic

[Brite]

snip

I get you. Where I work, I get a BUNCH of old men still running high on hormones and I get MANY comments and uncalled for "compliments". I just smile and wish them a good day. If it's bothering you, politely ask them to stop. If it continues, get someone to help you. I had to get my manager a few times.

[Omega Entity]

Rhynn, I'm agreeing with MM and Ghosty on this one.

 

A) It wasn't a comment you were intended to hear. Getting mad at the guy would be the equivilant of getting mad at someone who buttdialed you and said things you didn't want to hear. It was more than likely an accident, and was something that he would have said even if the line had disconnected.

 

2) Making a big deal out of it will likely cause more issues than it solves. There was no I'll intent behind it, the guy wasn't being pervy directly -to- you, and in the end will make you seem like you have too thin of skin. It'd be different if he told -you-, directly, that you have the voice of a sex chat operator (something that actually happened to my sister when she worked fast food - it was a customer, though), but he didn't.

 

There were some other points I had thought of, but they're escaping me now. The curse of posting from a tablet.

Edited February 8, 2015 by Omega Entity

[C88]

I've been wanting to say this for ages, but I don't want to sound like a whiny little brat. Anyways, I've noticed that when I'm in a certain chat and try to start a conversation, I get ignored. I join the chat to socialize and talk with people, but people just keep talking about whatever they're saying and don't even really acknowledge that I'm there.

 

The people in the chat seems like a somewhat close-knit group (they are all friends), and right now I feel like an outsider. I wanted to ask you guys about it, since you are so helpful.Is there any way I can actually get people to talk to me? It is fine for them to keep talking about what they were saying, but I feel bad when they just brush off what I said when I was trying to talk. I have no friends left irl, and I just feel so lonely...

Edited February 9, 2015 by C88

[Omega Entity]

If there's already a conversation going on when you try to start another one, there's your problem. It could be seen as you trying to take control of the chat, and that's usually going to result in annoying the people who already have a topic going; so rather than endearing yourself to the group, you're probably coming off as annoying by trying to not only butt in, but attempting to waylay the conversation in the process. It'd be one thing if you're an established member of the group, but if not, you're hurting your chances getting in by approaching it the way you are.

 

The best thing to do, if you have the patience, is to try and -join in- on the current topic, rather than forcing the group as a whole to take up yours in order to communicate with you. Chime in when you can with some (hopefully) appreciated comments and go from there. Once you've proven yourself to not be a nuisance (in the group's opinion) in trying to commandeer the chat, you'll probably find people a lot more willing to talk with you.

 

Or, the group is a giant group of jerks, in which case there's a number of chats out there without a bunch of buttheads.

[C88]

If there's already a conversation going on when you try to start another one, there's your problem. It could be seen as you trying to take control of the chat, and that's usually going to result in annoying the people who already have a topic going; so rather than endearing yourself to the group, you're probably coming off as annoying by trying to not only butt in, but attempting to waylay the conversation in the process. It'd be one thing if you're an established member of the group, but if not, you're hurting your chances getting in by approaching it the way you are.

 

The best thing to do, if you have the patience, is to try and -join in- on the current topic, rather than forcing the group as a whole to take up yours in order to communicate with you. Chime in when you can with some (hopefully) appreciated comments and go from there. Once you've proven yourself to not be a nuisance (in the group's opinion) in trying to commandeer the chat, you'll probably find people a lot more willing to talk with you.

 

Or, the group is a giant group of jerks, in which case there's a number of chats out there without a bunch of buttheads.

Most of the time they are talking about things I have no idea about, and when I do try to join in it doesn't work. So prettymuch my only option is to shut up and stop being an annoying little Though this does happen when there aren't any conversations-and at other times the chat is empty so I have to leave. Sorry if I came off as a whiny little

[Omega Entity]

Eh, s'ok. I know I've had my share of whiny days. I've also had more than my share of *y days, to we're even

 

Sounds like, then, that you would probably be better off seeking out a more welcoming chat site.

[C88]

Well, the chat is on a wiki, actually. I get a weird feeling that there is some kind of popularity thing. Example: When one of the mods come onto the chat everyone says hi and they usually plunge into a conversation, but if someone like, say, me entered, nobody says anything mostly and they continue talking about something I don't know about.

 

I keep thinking: what's the point of joining a chat if I can't talk to anyone? Any attempt at a conversation is useless, and even when I am part of the conversation I feel excluded. I wanted to chat and socialize, but it seems to be getting me nowhere. I have one or two people on there I have talked with (a few hours ago I had a rather, err, "interesting" conversation about twinkies), but when they aren't on its hopeless.

[Omega Entity]

All the more reason to find another chat, then. If it's very cliquish, they're not open to new people in general and the population stagnates because of it, leading to more of an environment where new people don't stick around because of it. You're probably not the only one it's happening to.

[C88]

All the more reason to find another chat, then. If it's very cliquish, they're not open to new people in general and the population stagnates because of it, leading to more of an environment where new people don't stick around because of it. You're probably not the only one it's happening to.

I recall hearing about some catastrophe that struck a huge blow to the wiki last year, and it caused many people to leave. That may be why they are so close-knit, but really I don't get it. I don't know where else to look, and there's no way in hell I'm going to Facebook or Twitter of Tumblr or anything like that. I'm prettymuch screwed as far as social interaction goes...

[Omega Entity]

Then look for some chats based on an interest you have. There's a ton out there, you just need to take the time and look.

 

If you're giving up... well, there's not a whole lot that anyone can do to help you with that, except you.

[Thuban]

The dragcave IRC is prone to ignoring new users for a little while, unless the new person jumps right into conversation. One of the reasons is because of returning trolls who show up with new names and IPs (sometimes multiple times a day). Generally, after a little while, people do get more friendly though. I'm nearly always pokable to chat with!

 

When I'm in the chat, and actually active, I try to make a point to say hi to names I dont recognize. I've had quite a few years of being in there, and some of the regulars have been there as long as I have, if not longer. If you decide the channel is too busy, we encourage users to make channels of their own to go chat in. Events are insane so your first visit happening during one has potential to be rather overwhelming. Mods are a bit stricter than normal, during events, but most days, most of us are pretty laid back.

 

You are welcome to come lurk, and get a feel for how we do things if you like. Everything you need to know about it can be found in "site discussion" under the "irc rules" sticky.

 

 

 

Edit:

My meds are finally working, but im not sure its a good thing. Waiting on the head-guy to call me back and tell me what i need to do now. Wish someone would have told me if i needed to talk to the med guy or the head guy though. In the mean time, yay for keeping myself as distracted as possible.

Edited February 9, 2015 by Thuban

[Chicogal]

I'm just so ****ing depressed, and I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

 

Please take stuff of a more serious nature to a professional or at least a hotline.

 

I just feel so worthless and uninspired. Last year, I was the clever girl. Not pretty, not funny, but I was smart. I understood things well, and I aspired to be an engineer. I do have low self esteem, but I could see what my 'talent' was, if you could call it that.

 

This year, I started a new program at my school. I can see my grades crashing even before I've written any tests. I don't understand things. I had to excuse myself from my Physics class today just to clear my head in the bathroom. I just stood there, trying to make sense of everything that's going on in my life and trying not to hyperventilate like I do at home.

 

I started some of my (mildly) self-destructive behaviour. I'm having to cover my arm with a plaster or a bandage - it's a 'cat scratch,' I tell them. I don't want to do it. But sometimes my pain is so bad that it's like I have tunnel vision, and I just see what distracts me from my own head.

 

It's like there's too much going on up there... And I just want to stop it working. I overthink things, I stress too much. The last time I was this bad was about two years ago. I've been up and down since then, but this is the worst I've been in a while.

 

It's like I've lost who I am. I feel like my classmates (not my friends - the others) really disrespect me, and it hurts badly.

 

I shouldn't be so depressed over my problems. They're really trivial when compared to other people's issues. I guess what I'm getting at is that I suspect myself to be bipolar, because I really do shoot up and down. I can't tell my mother. I can't tell anyone. I have to handle this by myself.

 

I guess I just wanted to type this out. Maybe hear some kindly words. I'd appreciate them in the state I'm in. PMs. Anything.

Edited February 12, 2015 by SockPuppet Strangler

[Omega Entity]

Chicogal - You absolutely shouldn't handle this by yourself. Seek professional help. If you're harming yourself and even contemplating suicide you need to be talking to someone who is properly equipped and trained to help you with your problems. You also should speak to your mother about it. You may not realize it, but if she's around you any great amount of time she likely already knows something is up.

 

There are people in your life that love and care about you. But most of all, you deserve to be happy.

[MedievalMystic]

Chicogal, it's like Omega said, you need to talk to someone about this and it seems a professional is in order.

 

I've got news for you. You were smart last year. And you're still smart this year. Smarts don't simply vanish into thin air, they're with you forever. Feeling low doesn't make your smarts go away, so no worries on that.

 

 

Tell your parents. You MUST. Or, if you really feel you can't tell them, tell another adult that you trust. Have them get you to a pro. That person can give you a medicine that will help slow and calm your mind down to where you can think normally again and all of this will feel like a bad dream. There's no shame in it. Your brain is like any other organ or body part. If you broke your leg, you'd get it fixed, right? Same with your mind. The sooner you talk to someone about this and get help, the sooner you'll feel much, much better.

 

You might think this is the end of the world, but it's just a blip on your screen. Take care.

Edited February 11, 2015 by MedievalMystic