Posted June 17, 2017 How do you guys write breed-accurate descriptions for Brimstone dragons? I usually try to write a dragon's personality to somewhat match its breed's archetype, but all I'm getting from Brimstones is that they stink. I've had a poor Brimmy waiting for a description for a solid week at this point and still have no ideas. Maybe use one of the prompts? :> Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 I went looking for mine. Apparently, I had the same problem. Euritt, Jevdefor, and Rhampage all have relatively short descriptions and only Jev's refers at all to the gas brimstones store in their pouches. There are a few breeds I don't tend to pick up that often because the breed descriptions don't yield much description inspiration for me. Brimstones are one of them. Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 My one brimstone dragon's description is just about the name I gave him. I think your best bet for that would be picking a prompt or giving it a name and going off of that. https://dragcave.net/view/NU3xK Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 Brimstones leave a lot of room for creativity - all their breed description really talks about is their habitat and dietary habits, so you can write almost anything. https://dragcave.net/view/rXdLU - first description of a brimstone: straightforward https://dragcave.net/view/VI4rH - likes romantic walks with his object of affection https://dragcave.net/view/JqmWm - Trillian's description attached to a brimstone https://dragcave.net/view/IgToo - potatoes. https://dragcave.net/view/w4FLa - learns language via books https://dragcave.net/view/ao9Xw - likes the number 3 https://dragcave.net/view/psZwE - Natayah's, um, description attached to a brimstone https://dragcave.net/view/yWjlf - likes hugs a little too much https://dragcave.net/view/bnIAc - has macaroni-penguin-phobia Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 (edited) Well darn. Thank goodness for Find and Replace. I ran across Wet Work as I was going through descriptions yesterday afternoon, and I literally laughed out loud and thought "This is brilliant!" It looked fine when I clicked "approve" on it. There was actually a lot of really great ones yesterday. ETA- Hahaha I just saw your links dirtytabs. Turns out almost all the ones I laughed at yesterday were yours! Btw, the link for the penguinaphobic dragon is not going to the right dragon. And it really should, because that was another hilarious one. Edited June 17, 2017 by jocosa Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 Thank you! Ooh Hot, right? Yup, Ooh Hot. It's not showing your description for her, if she is the adorable penguin fearer. Share this post Link to post
Posted June 17, 2017 Shoot - I checked if I missed someone else - but obviously not far back enough I added you know. Thanks. Meanwhile, commenters keep discovering more basic problems in Pink Mania and Stuck in the Coach's descriptions. I'm slightly embarrassed that I made so many mistakes and promptly failed to catch them; and am about ready to give up on fixing them... Hahaha I just saw your links dirtytabs. Turns out almost all the ones I laughed at yesterday were yours I take that as a challenge. I'm going to go write some silly descriptions now... MUAHAHAHAHA! Share this post Link to post
Posted June 18, 2017 (edited) Mail dragon - https://dragcave.net/view/AOLzt (name based on her code!) Random - https://dragcave.net/view/wBj6H A rainy day (kind of) - https://dragcave.net/view/TqNYp Random - https://dragcave.net/view/TzNFD Random - https://dragcave.net/view/WJZZY Random - https://dragcave.net/view/RVdAR Edited June 18, 2017 by Lagie Share this post Link to post
Posted June 18, 2017 (edited) I take that as a challenge. I'm going to go write some silly descriptions now... MUAHAHAHAHA! Nooo! My niche! Edited June 18, 2017 by dirtytabs Share this post Link to post
Posted June 18, 2017 Since I have no plans, gonna be using the next few days to catch up on my huge backlog >.> Here's the first of them. https://dragcave.net/lineage/lcorP Share this post Link to post
Posted June 18, 2017 Random - https://dragcave.net/view/EOl8j The Crimson Players Share this post Link to post
Posted June 19, 2017 (edited) These are my two latest descriptions: https://dragcave.net/view/ZuFL3 https://dragcave.net/view/Na1Xg https://dragcave.net/view/QWLqV They haven't been approved yet. Both of them were made when I was tired, so they might not be of the highest quality. Edited June 19, 2017 by Peachycupcake525 Share this post Link to post
Posted June 19, 2017 (edited) Described: June 1st Carpet Death June 5th Abandon Egg Hatch Stop Tapdancing on Bubble Wrap Silver Spoon Cheesie Has A Name The Only June 6 Lost in Cheesie Wistful Dreams of Cuffs TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH THAT June 8 Exquisite Rosehip Tea History at Nine June 15th Angry Zombie Fodder June 19, 2017 Cheesie Earl - Pending Cheesie Butler - Pending June 20, 2017 Pancakes in the Dirt - Pending Edited June 20, 2017 by Kanaye Share this post Link to post
Posted June 19, 2017 Two more! https://dragcave.net/view/MlPES (an unusual specialty, dealing with humans) https://dragcave.net/view/zK1NM (unusual hoard, getting along (or not) with the neighbors) Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 That unusual hoard made me laugh, Tabs! Random - https://dragcave.net/view/8IsH0 Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 (edited) So on my "Cheesie Buttler" someone suggested buttlering. I don't want buttlering, I want buttling, which is also a real word. The person who eventually approves it won't change it to buttlering, right? Edited June 20, 2017 by Kanaye Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 That unusual hoard made me laugh, Tabs! Random - https://dragcave.net/view/8IsH0 Boy, he's not getting the awe and deference a sinomorph deserves, huh? So on my "Cheesie Buttler" someone suggested buttlering. I don't want buttlering, I want buttling, which is also a real word. The person who eventually approves it won't change it to buttlering, right? Now that you've brought it up here, probably not. Mods are good about not blindly making every suggested edit. I've had a similar issue with "thermopolium" in the queue, and the mod approved it without changes. Or maybe the reviewer doesn't like humorous back-formations. Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 (edited) I decided to write descriptions for the frozen nebulae I have on my scroll. I use them as markers between other dragons. If I get a nebula that doesn't follow the lineage I freeze it for this purpose. I wrote my description, it was rejected due to grammar (which is fine with me). I had a couple of nice comments so decided to make the changes. Second attempt ended with the comments - please use more commas and being told that freezing only stops ageing. So... I added more commas. Now on attempt three, someone has abstained due to my comments regarding wing colour. The description status is awaiting moderation, but I'm really just feeling like giving up. I don't think I can go through a 4th revision when I have zero characters left. Is there anyone that can look it over and give me a hand? I really don't know what to do? Apologies if this is the wrong place to ask, I'll happily remove the post if needed. Description: Being the only daughter of a proud Golden Wyvern father and Red Nebula mother, Trades was bound for greatness. Some say that the color of the wings is no choice and that it is down to the dragon's diet or maybe the time of year they were born. The truth is that no one really knows. Trades knew from an early age that she was expected to continue the family line by finding a suitable mate and settling down. All she wanted was to fly. To visit new places and gaze up at the stars. A loner by nature and rather lazy to boot, she would rather spend her days sleeping and her evenings watching the stars. Trades gained her blue wings much to the disappointment of her parents. Knowing she was no longer good enough, she made plans to leave the nest and follow her dreams. As she laid sleeping, her father froze her in place as a lesson to his future offspring not to be disobedient. Trades now stands defiantly frozen in time, her eyes pleading to Nebulae across the land not to follow in her footsteps Edited to add description, thanks sock. Edited June 20, 2017 by stikystuff Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 Always feel free to post your descrip here so people can help look it over. <3 Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 (edited) Now on attempt three, someone has abstained due to my comments regarding wing colour. I was probably the comma person, or one of them. Anyway, what was the wing colour thing about? Not knowing that nebula dragons copy nebula patterns? If you change "Being" to "As", you can fit the period at the end. Edit: Oh she is literally frozen in one spot? I would take issue with that. Edited June 20, 2017 by dirtytabs Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 Second attempt ended with the comments - please use more commas and being told that freezing only stops ageing. I'm the one who commented on freezing, and I wasn't trying to critique you - I was just trying to explain that the typical text from freezing ("You cast a spell on the hatchling that prevents any ageing") doesn't normally mean freezing the hatchling in time and space. If your golden wyvern cast a different spell that has such an effect, that's fine. I was trying to let you know that if you wanted to make a happy story where Trades can fly as an eternal adolescent, it wouldn't go against the flavour text. It is an option that you don't need to take. I'm sorry if I came across as discouraging. Your description is pretty good. Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 dirtytabs - Yes I believe you were one (of a couple) who commented on my punctuation - you should see my handwriting IRL, it would probably drive you mad Kakaru - I really had to shorten the description I literally wrote a page about Trades, since Golden Wyverns are rumored to have magical abilities and proud I thought that I might get away with saying Trades was frozen by a spell and golden wyverns can change one substance into another so I can't see why she couldn't stone or ice. I intended to give the impression that Trades was frozen in place a bit like a gargoyle statue. Does that make any more sense? Your comments really are helpful, it just seems the issues are Trades being frozen in place and the reason for her wing color, which is well, the entire point of the description. Share this post Link to post
Posted June 20, 2017 I see no problem with the whole wing colour back story and love the idea of freezing one that has coloured incorrectly. I think my biggest issue would be the frozen in place versus frozen in size, but I seem to recall accepting this one when I saw it. Share this post Link to post
Recommended Posts