Description Force!

[HawktalonOfRiverClan]

Wow. I come back from a long hiatus to find that not only has my own list of pending descriptions been modded, but the entire queue is almost nothing. I wrote a description last week and had it approved when I checked again a few days later. O: I can't remember the last time that's happened. You mods are amazing, it must've been hell trying to get through that massive queue when I left. And you've kept up with it, too? Just. Wow.

[Earth Gurl]

6 hours ago, HawktalonOfRiverClan said:

Wow. I come back from a long hiatus to find that not only has my own list of pending descriptions been modded, but the entire queue is almost nothing. I wrote a description last week and had it approved when I checked again a few days later. O: I can't remember the last time that's happened. You mods are amazing, it must've been hell trying to get through that massive queue when I left. And you've kept up with it, too? Just. Wow.

 

It's so nice to see your descriptions back in the queue! Glad to have you back. Yeah we go through the queue to nothing every two weeks or so. I'm letting them build up for a reviewing event though (I think). 

 

On that note, anyone message me if they don't want to wait lol

[purpledragonclaw]

I can't take credit, Hawktalon, that was mostly EG. I am on an approving spree now, though, and just approved yours.

 

EG, we don't have to let it build up just for an event. Or at least, we shouldn't let them build up past a certain point. I love that the queue is below 100, I'd like to keep it that way.

[Lagie]

I appreciate the short/very short queue, too! Thanks, EG!

[SheridanCharon]

I keep finding dragons that reference real world stuff like Steven Universe and Gorillaz but don't work it into the site lore in any way :/

[Lagie]

Automatic reject, though you could suggest they rework the phrasing so as to not reference stuff directly.

[Kunikunatu]

Is it acceptable to write a description that deals with cell theory/evolution? For reference, this is what I'm writing:

Quote

Galy claims that, as a dinosaur, she is as old as life on Valkemare itself- although she doesn't seem too happy with the direction it's taken. Nearly every day she can be seen lazing about in front of her cave, droning on and on about how everything used to be better to any dragon that will listen. "Feh, you kids have it easy with your newfangled 'evolution' and 'environmental niches'," she'll say. "Back in MY day, we didn't even have species with common ancestors, because we all WERE the common ancestors! Every single one of us was the exact same as everyone else, and we LIKED IT!" No dragon has yet managed to ask her how she currently exists as a multicellular organism, simply because she doesn't let them get a word in edgewise. Eventually, most dragons either walk away out of impatience or fall asleep by the time she starts reminiscing about her simple, happy childhood, floating about aimlessly with all the other proto-organisms and eating homemade primordial soup.

 

I know DC is based in Medieval Times so if it's like the Earth equivalent, the theories technically wouldn't have been formulated yet? But it's not Earth, so I suppose it's plausible someone might have thought of it.

[Lagie]

That one looks fine to me!

[Kunikunatu]

Ok, thanks! ;D

[Lagie]

Hit the end of the queue again! It's nice to see a majority of approve-able descriptions coming through.

[Earth Gurl]

^^ Yeah it's been really nice.  There are very few that are unacceptable. I've been rejecting for proofreads though, but with their being approved so quickly, I don't think people are that annoyed with that.

[SheridanCharon]

I keep coming across dragons with descriptions that are just song lyrics with very slight changes, like one was Smashmouth's "All-star" with the name of another dragon in it and another was just straight lyrics from Whitney Houston's "I will always love you." ._. Are these reject-worthy?

Edited October 20, 2017 by SheridanCharon

[Dirtytabs]

Likely. There are ways to work in lyrics if you really want to ("Oh My Darling, Clementine" from Rally Vincent, "Killer Queen" - more abstruse(?)), but you need to be clever about it, not just make tiny changes.

[SheridanCharon]

I just found another one that was asking why do the descriptions have to be serious and why can't they just be fun, that it's not "spam" if it's funny. Most likely the same person who was putting all the song lyrics in descriptions. Auto-reject and a message of "Read the rules."

 

Is reading the rules really that hard?

[Lagie]

It's not spam if it's funny, but funny still has to follow the rules!

(Yes, for some people, reading the rules is a supreme challenge.)

[Rally Vincent]

On 20.10.2017 at 10:39 AM, SheridanCharon said:

I keep coming across dragons with descriptions that are just song lyrics with very slight changes, like one was Smashmouth's "All-star" with the name of another dragon in it and another was just straight lyrics from Whitney Houston's "I will always love you." ._. Are these reject-worthy?

 

14 hours ago, Dirtytabs said:

Likely. There are ways to work in lyrics if you really want to ("Oh My Darling, Clementine" from Rally Vincent, "Killer Queen" - more abstruse(?)), but you need to be clever about it, not just make tiny changes.

 

I have another (Fluff The Magic Chicken) description based on a song, so it is possible to get them approved with a little bit of work.

 

 

On the matter of comments, though - with some comments you know the commenter just skimmed over the description, for example when the comment says: "There were no United States [...]" when in the description it says United Caves (not States). Just saying that it isn't always the one who writes the description who made a mistake.

Edited October 21, 2017 by Rally Vincent

[SheridanCharon]

3 hours ago, Rally Vincent said:

 

 

I have another (Fluff The Magic Chicken) description based on a song, so it is possible to get them approved with a little bit of work.

 

 

On the matter of comments, though - with some comments you know the commenter just skimmed over the description, for example when the comment says: "There were no United States [...]" when in the description it says United Caves (not States). Just saying that it isn't always the one who writes the description who made a mistake.

Except this person wasn't. They were literally just copying the song lyrics, pasting them in the description and changing maybe one word. If that.

 

I get that IRL things can be used so long as they are reworked into the lore, seen more than enough that are done well and used a few myself, but these weren't. It was more like they were just copying songs I've seen used in memes "for the lulz". And I know memes can be done well in descriptions, too - the number of Shrek dragons I immediately approved because they actually put some effort to make them good.

 

So it's not like I reject "just because", I mean, at the same time when these popped up, I saw one with a good description but had an (IRL) note. Even though I know this technically breaks the rules and should be a reject, I gave it an abstain with a message that the note needed to be removed but that the description itself was good.

 

Point is, I only reject if it clearly breaks the rules or needs reworking because of several factors. And with reworking, these ones could work, but not as they were when I saw them.

Edited October 21, 2017 by SheridanCharon

[Dirtytabs]

I do try to be careful with lyrics-based descriptions and almost-real-world-references, and I appreciate how carefully the (approvable) ones are phrased. There were several Rejects for a description I wrote about the landlocked region known for cookware, Japan, and that's frustrating, I know. I read the song lyrics descriptions in the queue earlier, and those can't be approved, but rather than comment, "this is no good", I said, "you should be subtler about what you're trying to reference. You may write new lyrics that follow the meter or turn this into prose using [name of song] as inspiration".

 

As for writer comments, if the comment explains or elaborates something in the description, I tell the user that the description should speak for itself and that they should understand that an out-of-story comment can't remain on a description. If it's something like, "((Mod, I made the corrections you suggested!))" and the description is otherwise good to go, I approve it and let the mod decide whether to remove the line for them.

[The Dragoness]

Is it just me or has there been a rise in joke descriptions lately? I decided to review some today and came across one that was simply "description." Another was a rant on why the current rules on descriptions are unfair 

 

Also, how should violence be handled? The description I came across was written in a silly tone, but still described murder and borderline sadistic traits. I couldn't find much in the description guidelines.

Edited October 21, 2017 by The Dragoness

[Earth Gurl]

On 10/21/2017 at 3:30 PM, The Dragoness said:

Is it just me or has there been a rise in joke descriptions lately? I decided to review some today and came across one that was simply "description." Another was a rant on why the current rules on descriptions are unfair 

 

Also, how should violence be handled? The description I came across was written in a silly tone, but still described murder and borderline sadistic traits. I couldn't find much in the description guidelines.

 

Yeah I've come across a bunch. The person ranting, I just told them to PM me, bc honestly, no one wants to read the same meme on 2148098324 descriptions. That's why there are rules. And I have plenty of dragons on my scroll with song lyrics incorporated. Copy-pasting song lyrics is not only against the rules, but it's borderline plagiarizing. 

 

If you're talking about the dragon who kills hatchlings (essentially children) by luring them in and killing them w/ grapefruit or w/e, yeah I rejected that so fast. It was morbid. The site is PG-13 and mild violence such as "X's watched his family slaughtered by humans, and he was all alone." Is okay. That doesn't make me uncomfortable. Untimely death appears in Disney movies, after all. However, going into morbid detail about brutally murdering things is too far.

 

Also, sorry guys I'm trying to catch up on descrips, I knocked out about 100 tonight, but I've been so busy. I'll try to catch up soon to see that 0 again. There's about 119 in the queue rn.

[Earth Gurl]

Descriptions back down to 1. (Posted this in the wrong thread initially bc I wasn't paying attention hah). 

[Lagie]

Amazing! Thank you, Earth Gurl!

[Chaos Rider]

I just wrote this description for one of my Desipis dragons and I was wondering if I could have some critiques. Not too violent for DC I hope:

 

Sparoth’s method of feeding may sound cruel but then he is a Desipis - cruel is par for the course for them. He effortlessly takes control of the smaller, simple minded drakes and pygmies and compels them to walk into his open mouth where he dispatches them with a single bite. For the larger and stronger-minded dragons a battle of wills ensues. When the other dragon is defeated Sparoth uses his influence to paralyze them so they can’t resist and will thus make an easier meal. Occasionally other dragons manage to best the Desipis in the contest of wills and instead of being attacked by his teeth and claws as they were expecting Sparoth just sits there and watches them escape. These dragons believe that this is because he sees them as a worthy opponent and allows them to do so.

[Dirtytabs]

1 hour ago, Chaos Rider said:

Sparoth’s method of feeding may sound cruel, but then he is a Desipis - cruel is par for the course for them. He effortlessly takes control of the smaller, simple minded drakes and pygmies and compels them to walk into his open mouth, where he dispatches them with a single bite. For the larger and stronger-minded dragons, a battle of wills ensues. When the other dragon is defeated, Sparoth uses his influence to paralyze them so they can’t resist and will thus make an easier meal. Occasionally, other dragons manage to best the Desipis in the contest of wills, and instead of being attacked by his teeth and claws as they were expecting, Sparoth just sits there and watches them escape. These dragons believe that this is because he sees them as a worthy opponents and allows them to do so.

Needs commas here and there to break up some passages - there are rules for comma use that I won't get into here, but generally, you should put them where pauses go. It's otherwise a nice description and conjures an amusing image of the dragon's lunches marching in line into his mouth.

[Chaos Rider]

Thanks, here's another Desipis I did:

 

When Garsath smelt the presence of another dragon on the edges of her territory, she immediately flew towards the intruder to scare them off. But when she was halfway there she suddenly lost the ability to fly, and was forced to stretch out her wings in a barely controlled glide to the ground. Guessing the cause of her loss of lift (for Desipis dragons are too heavy to fly without magic) she opened her mouth to breathe fire and was met with nothing as she had suspected. While walking back to her cave a brown dragon with black wing membranes flew overhead, and she was overcome with awful headaches and dizziness and the world spun around her - much worse than the time she got bit by that giant spider. Months later, terrorized by the brown dragon and hardly able to feed herself due to being unable to fly, or hunt the way a Desipis normally would; she wants nothing more than to leave the large forested island that was her home, but she can't swim either.

 

So you thought you'd put a Cassare in with an unruly Desipis, but you never considered what that would do to the poor Desipis did you?

Edited November 27, 2017 by Chaos Rider