Posted December 8, 2013 Let's face it, bad jokes can be pretty funny. Or awful. Even if they make you die a little inside, sometimes it's totally worth it. What are your favourite bad jokes? Keep to the board rules, guys, and keep it PG! At the moment, mine have to be... Q: What do you get if you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? A: About halfway. It's really hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally. Pirate One: "Why can't we play cards?" Pirate Two: "Because Captain Patchy is standing on the deck." A drumkit fell off a cliff. Ba-doom-tss! Share this post Link to post
Posted December 8, 2013 - A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" - What's soft and yellow and goes 'round and 'round and 'round? A long playing omelette. I knooow they're old, but all my favourite stupid jokes are! ...and I could fill the page with jokes like these Share this post Link to post
Posted December 8, 2013 (edited) I could tell you about the skunk that falls in love with a fart but...I'm not sure if anyone's ready for that. ..ahahah.a......short joke...whatever Edited December 8, 2013 by Draikette Share this post Link to post
Posted December 8, 2013 What kind of computer can sing? A Dell. Get it? A Dell, Adele..... sorry it's really dumb. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 probably my favorite knock knock joke ever: knock knock whose there interrupting cow interrupting co- MOOOOOOOOOO Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 How do you catch a lion in three easy steps? 1. Take a sheet of paper and rip it into small bits. 2. Climb onto a tree. 3. When the lion walks under the tree, let the bits of paper float down. The lion will think it's snow, and freeze to death. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 I don't like bad jokes. However, anti-jokes are my favorite jokes. (Hopefully this isn't too poor of taste) Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's age-related memory loss has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Why did the computer smell like hay? Because the farmer is in the dell. Crappy jokes will be crappy. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? ... Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? Person A: Knock knock Person B: *irritated* Who's there? Person A: Banana Person B: Banana who? Person A: Orange you glad I stop saying orange? Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 I was going to attend the clairvoyants meeting, but it was canceled due to unforeseen events. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal turns to the other and asks, "Does this taste funny to you?" Two atoms are in a bar. One says, "I think I lost an electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" To which the other replies, "I'm positive." A neutron walks into a bar. "How much for a drink here, anyway?" To which the bartender responds, "For you, no charge." I once visited a crematorium that gave discounts for burn victims. -Kaoto is shot to death- Worth it! -Dies- Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 A man walked into a bar. He said 'Ow'. A man walked into a drumkit. Ba-boom-boom-tish. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Lamest joke ever: Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. This one's actually able to make people laugh: What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Lamest joke ever: Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Depends on how you perceive it. For example... Crossing a road is a dangerous thing for any creature to do, especially one that couldn't fly to escape traffic. Perhaps the chicken knew what fate awaited it if it stayed where it was. So it took matters into its own hands and decided to cross the road... to get to the other side. I think too hard about these things. ----- A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment. What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, idiot! BREATHE! Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? A barber. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Person A: Knock, knock. Person B: Who's there? Person A: Who. Person B: Who who? Person A: So you're an owl now? Share this post Link to post
Posted December 9, 2013 Q. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a shark? A. Frost Bite. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 ^Those are funny. I know some jokes, but most of them are almost impossible to translate to English Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 A man walked into a bar. He said 'Ow'. ^My favorite joke foreveeerrr Why can't you surf on microwaves? Because they're too small. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 What time is it when a Dalek runs over your foot? Time to call a Doctor. why can't you have two Doctors in the same place? It would create a pair-a-docs. UGH. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 Why does Waldo wear a striped shirt? Because he doesn't want to be spotted! How many ears does Spock have? The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 Kanye West recently took in some birds. He put them in a Kanye Nest. Kanye West puts on his tie so he looks his Kanye Best. Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 (edited) Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? ... Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? Person A: Knock knock Person B: *irritated* Who's there? Person A: Banana Person B: Banana who? Person A: Orange you glad I stop saying orange? You have that backwards. They say "banana" constantly until the other person is irritated, then they say: Person A: Knock knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: Orange. Person B: Orange who? Person A: Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Kanye West recently took in some birds. He put them in a Kanye Nest. Kanye West puts on his tie so he looks his Kanye Best. I'm sure Kanye West needs to shave his Kanye Chest, but he'll probably just wear a Kanye Vest. With all of those birds he won't have room for his Kanye Guest. All that tweeting will hinder his studying for his Kanye Test. He'll give up on school and go on a Kanye Quest. On the Kanye Quest, he had to fight a Kanye Pest. With all of that fighting he took a much-needed Kanye Rest. When he woke, he was filled with Kanye Zest! With all that Kanye Zest, he headed off to Kanye West (lol), where in a dungeon he found a Kanye Crest. This entire story was a silly ol' Kanye Jest. c: /le shot Edited December 10, 2013 by edwardelricfreak Share this post Link to post
Posted December 10, 2013 (edited) What's Finnick's favorite game? Truth Odair. Hunger Games joke, a character's name is Finnick Odair. Edited December 10, 2013 by R0nb0t Share this post Link to post
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