Posted September 4, 2013 (edited) Plot: Back during medieval times, there were things that people believed didn't exist: dragons, unicorns, gryphons, centaurs, werewolves, vampires, and other mythological creatures. Some people were asked if they wanted to become a vampire or werewolf, some weren't. Some were born the way they are: Hybrids or Pures. The Hybrid creature was like a mix of two things, say a human and a centaur hybrid would be more human than centaur and so they would have the lower half of a horse but only two legs, and the upper half of a human. A Pure is a full bred creature, full centaur or full other creature. Now a Turned is someone who was born one thing, bitten by either A vampire or a werewolf and turned into something else. Each creature has its own sort of trait or ability that they were born with, Each one determines on what they are. For each race it's different: Vampires: Super Speed/ Super Strength Werewolves: Shape-shift into a full on wolf or a mix of both human and wolf. Super speed/ super hearing/ super sight/ and super smell. Centaurs: Ability to commune with animals Elves: The ability to manifest elements to their ability (Only partially to fight) Dragons: Ability to communicate with each other telepathically and the ability to have any kind of element including a species specific element. (Use DC Dragons only not like some make believe dragon) Unicorns: They can heal with a touch of their horn, but that power determines on how hard they work on it. If they work hard enough of that power they can raise the dead. Harpies: They have the ability to turn into full birds, and to communicate with other birds. Gryphons: Their ability is changing shape from a golden eagle to a Savannah lion to a mix of both. Demons: Possessing of the soul, must be a humanoid like the elves, vampires, werewolves, harpies, and humans. Angels: Healers of the demon possessed Humans: Their ability is to become a Mage/ Magick wielder. The different races have their own sections of the lands, always allowing the other races to journey onto their lands under one condition; kill someone and get killed. Now there is two Main cities, one for the light creatures (Unicorns, Angels, Light Gryphons, Centaurs, Humans, and Elves.) This city is called Dalanaaricarn. And then the city for the Dark Creatures (Vampires, Werewolves, Dragons, Dark Gryphons, Demons, and Harpies.) This city is called Gilneacus. Their Government is set up like a kingdom’s would be, only there is one king and one queen. The King is from the city of Darkness, while the queen is from the city of Light. History: Each race has always been living on this island, but in dwindling numbers. The Dragon were actually the original inhabitants of the island, they knew how to cross the ocean to land to land and decided that the Island of Izendornia was the safest place in the world for them. Then as people started following the dragons journeys from land to land they found they could also inhabit the island. The Gryphons came as young children, their wings not as strong but strong enough to last them the trip. Soon after the gryphons came the harpies, the demons, and the angels. As more and more of each race started going there so did the expectations of a establishment. It was the elves who originally set up the government to where they were in charge instead. But as the different races started to rebel against the elves they all came up with an agreement, Each race will be represented through the kingdom. The King: Vaylaren Dosknightre ~ Demon The Queen: Lilliana Riverwood-Doshknightre~Angel They live in a castle between the two Cities, in the middle of the densest forest. It is called the Pearls Gate. Setting: The land there is very mountainous, with a large spanning forest and cities near two different coasts of the large island. There are also swamps, plains, and even coastal trade towns all across the coasts. Your Goal: To survive the changes that are coming, the war of the cities, and to find peace with your own kind. Fight, Win, Love, and Live are your goals and they will be succeeded or you will die. Rules: 1.No power-playing. 2.Keep violence and romance at a PG-13 level. 3.DC Dragons only. 4.No bright colors. Like This 5.No flaming. Swearing or cussing. 6.Only four characters for each username. 7. Limits for talents is two Talents, Not Including the racial talent. 8. If your characters are inactive without warning for a long time you will be put on the banned list and removed.. Just and Fyi because I think it's rude for us to be waiting on someone with no notice. Now If you come back with a reason Message it to me instead of posting it and I will allow you back. BANNED: Soleas Colorcodedchaos Forms: PM me the forms. They should look like this: Username: Name: Gender: Age: Appearance: Species: Personality: Mate: Talents: Other: ACCEPTED~ Username: Sylviinael Name: Daimeoc Gender: Male Appearance Species: Snow Leopard Gryphon Personality: Courageous, Strong, Loving, Passionate. Mate: Chessayia Talents: Ice elements, and species talent. Other: N/a History: Unknown Username: Sylviinael Name: Chessayia Gender: Female Appearance: Species: Panther Gryphon Personality: Loving, Shy, Not evil, Passionate. Mate: Daimeoc Talents: Shadow Shifter, can turn into shadows for stealth. Species talent. Other: N/A History: Unknown Username: XxDragonletxX Name: Rosali Gender: Female Appearance: Her scales are lighter than most Mint Dragons, she has striking purple eyes and her tail is longer than most. She lithe thin than most of her species. Species: Mint Dragon Personality: Rosali is mysterious at most, but loving and kind. She will do her best to calm tensions between dragons and fights. She hates conflict but her brain is as quick as her tongue. Seeing that sometimes she starts up fights unintentionally and on accident, she can easily dodge/avoid them and move on. Mate: Open. Talents: Unlike others, she has a good sense of hearing and smell. She also likes to climb trees. She can control the flowers/nature pretty much. Other: Nothing that much. Username: makenziec123 Name: Luna Gender: Female Appearance: fair skin, red hair, blue/grey eyes, very tall and lean and has braod shoulders; turns into a red-ish colored wolf Species: werewolf Personality: Quiet and quick to anger, but gentle when necessary. She is very brave and also very protective of those she cares for because of her fiercely loyal nature. Mate: will find one later in the rp Talents: She's very clever and can figure a way out of any problem, or find a loophole in any sentence. Other: She can be a bit intimidating at first because of her strong, silent nature and tendency towards sarcasm. Her eyes are an indicator of her mood. Grey is sad, light grey-blue is happy, dark grey is angry, and blue is curious or thinking. Since she doesn't talk much her friend/traveling companion Roark usually does so for her. She also is not the best of friends with a certain demon named Gibraltr, who is hunting her and Roark. She hates him because he is the reason she is no longer human. Username: makenziec123 Name: Roark Gender: male Appearance: he has dark brown hair, fair skin and brown eyes. He is tall and strong and his wings are more of a fawn-color. Species: Angel Personality: Kind, helpful, and out going. He will always lend a hand to those in need. Mate: might find one later Talents: for whatever reason his bones are hollow like birds, so he can fly very fast but is still very strong. Other: Roark is Luna's "Guardian Angel". They became friends back when Luna was just a child and have been together ever since; even after Luna was bitten by a werewolf and had to move to Gilneacus. He hid his wings under a trench coat so that he could still stay with her. Username: makenziec123 Name: Gibraltr Gender: Male Appearance: he doesn't really have a definite form, but he usually looks like a stunningly handsome man with black hair, olive skin, green eyes, and is always wearing full black clothes. Species: Demon Personality: cruel, deceitful, untrustworthy, and never forgets a debt. Mate: none Talents: he can play tricks with peoples minds to confuse them and lure them into a trap (although he doesn't have complete control) Other: Gibraltr is the main reason that Luna was turned into a werewolf: he became infatuated with Luna when he first laid eyes on her and decided that he would have her for himself. So he devised a plan to turn her into a werewolf: he used his talent to draw her out into a field full of werewolves. He then used his talent to bring the strongest of those wolves forward while keeping the rest at bay and made it bite her. As soon as it bit her Roark came flying in to her rescue: prying the werewolf away from his friend and knocking the demon out cold before flying away. Gibraltr vows to take revenge on Roark some day and then he will take Luna as his forever. Username: Narath Name: Vorthal Gender: Male Age: 20 Species: Half breed (Black dragon and Human) Appearance: He is six feet and three inches tall, with moderately tanned skin, and a strong build. His face is thin and sharp, almost like an elf's, and the irises of his eyes are a bright emerald color. When performing any type of magic, his eyes will begin to turn completely green, and give off a strong glow. His long, messy chin length black hair is able to just cover the small curved black horns on his head. The wings that sprout from his back are completely black, and have a wing span of about ten feet. As well as wings, he also has a tail that is about six feet long. The tips of his fingers and toes have black claws that are about one inch in length. The whole of his body is covered in small black scales, except for the insides of his legs, the undersides of his arms and hands, the front of his abdomen, and his head. Because people will often shun him because of his half-breed nature, he will often be trying to conceal what sets him apart. Because of this he will often wear a dark brown hooded cloak, under which he will have a long sleeved tan linen shirt and trousers, leather gloves, a brown leather belt and boots. This everyday wear helps to hide everything but his wings and tail. To hide those, he wears a large leather rucksack with slots cut in the back of it so he can fit in his wings and tail. The other compartments in his pack hold his armor, sword, and shield. A silver and gold ring with a black jem adorns his finger. It was a gift from his parents, only, they never told him what it was for. He can feel magic emanating from it, but he has no clue what that magic does. Personality: Though straightforwards, and stern on the outside, he is usually very passionate. He is a person who will help those who ask for it, as long as it fits his moral standards (he will kill, but he won't 'massacre' those who are defenseless for example). But he often doesn't get the chance to show his prowess since no one accepts him for who he is. The beings on the dark side of the island think him a traitor, as his mother had been a light allied human who had become his dragon father's mate. The beings of the light side despised him, thinking him an abomination and a monster. Hence the reason for his 'shell' that covers how he really feels most often. Mate: Open Talents: Holy/dark magic (can create harmful or healing energies, as well as blessing, cursing, and enchanting objects (sometimes requires specific objects)). Other: His mother (a human) and his father (a dragon) never really explained to him why or how they came to being mates. They always had to live away from others, as they would surely be attacked by whoever chanced upon them. Both kingdoms saw them as traitors as they had both married each other though they were on opposite sides of these kingdoms. This helped to make him strong though. Instead of becoming a pampered child from a Lord's house, or a babied hatchling of a dragon, he had to learn from an early age how to survive. His father taught him how to hunt, how to fight, and a few dark magics, his mother taught him many light magics. Though he quickly learnt these lessons, his parents weren't able to teach him everything he needed to know in time. When he was thirteen, hunters, and warriors finally caught up to them, and killed his parents. Vorthal himself barely managed to escape alive, but he has survived on his own since, doing a few odd jobs across the land for either kingdom, learning and enhancing skills as he went. Username: XxDragonletxX Name: Malothere Gender: Female Age: 31 years (8 in human) Appearance: Has sooty feathers with rusty brown patches here and there. She has armor on her chest, legs and ankles, on her back and hindquarters. She also has Battle claws on her talons, like Species: Gryphon Personality: Malothere is quiet in nature and she is brave. She is capable of delivering messages from long distances. She speaks in an unknown tongue. She thinks before she speaks or does anything for that matter, but she is quick to claw someone if they accuse her of something or attack her. Mate: N/A Talents: Nothing really, just camouflage Other: Sister is Chessayia Username: ArtemisArcher Name: Barbara Gender: Female Age: 20 Appearance: (How she looks in her profile pic) Species: Warrior Angel Personality: Caring, Feisty, Flirtatious, Cocky, and loves a good fight. Mate: James Talents: She has the ability to heal anyone by touching them. She can also summon holy creatures (Like other angels, dogs cats, phoenix's etc) Other: Though she is James' mate, he never admits it to anyone. She also isn't banned from Valhalla, and wishes so very badly James would repent and come back. Oh and she is pregnant. Username: kingcobra2018 Name: Tyler Gender: Female Age: 19 Appearance: with fangs. Species: vampire Personality: ~inconsiderate ~self centered ~cares about crushes ~funny Mate: N/A Talents: ~lying/tricking people ~species talent Other: Nope Username: kingcobra2018 Name: Zane Gender: Male Age: 23 Appearance: Species: Elf Personality: ~Caring ~Helpful ~thoughtful Mate: nope Talents: ~Good at not rushing things/thinking things through ~Species talent Other: Nope Username: kingcobra2018 Name: Emma Gender: female Age: 17 Appearance: Species: Werewolf Personality: human/wolf ~Shy ~caring ~considerate half human half wolf ~Uncontrollable/unpredictable Mate: none Talents: ~voice change ~super hearing Other: None Username: kingcobra2018 Name: Caleb Gender: Male Age: 30 Appearance: Species: Human wizard Personality: ~Scary ~cruel ~mean Mate: none Talents: ~Fire magic Other: None Username: Saphira- Dragon Name: Rika Gender: Female Age: Unknown Appearance: Species: Gray Dragon Personality: A short temper that flares often at the smallest of things, she is fiery and rather straight to the point. Despite these flaws she has an intelligent mind, quick tongue and a soft side that she will never admit to. A hatred for humans as they hunt her purely to tame her so she can be some sort of prized pet. Mate: N/A Talents: The master of the weather due to her species and one of the best fliers in known history, she has advanced her natural born gift of speaking to her kind with her mind to extend it to other creatures, not very good but practice does make perfect. Other: she currently has loyalty to no one but she may side with someone….. Username: Lothuielel Name: Selenia Herondale Age: looks 16 Gender: Female Personality: Selenia is a keep to herself kind of girl. She never engages herself in anything. She hardly as any friends. Appearance: Human form, Wolf Form Creature: Werewolf-vampire hybrid Mate:~~ Talent: telepathic and can sense anything with her mind Username: Sylviinael Name: Known as "Shadow.." Or "Ghost" Gender: Male Age: 200 years old and counting. Appearance: He is tall and muscular, and wears a chain around his neck. Attatched to the chain is an amulet with a pentagram on it. Species: Unicorn Personality: He is an often misjudged Stallion. He is dark and dreary but that is because his attitude makes him feel unloved. His appearance betrays him as evil, but is a truly nice guy, a fierce warrior that instead of healing, kills. Mate: None, Doesn’t care for one. Talents: Raising the Dead, Summoning Spirits, Can heal but doesn’t feel like it. He can speak both verbally and telepathically. Username: Narath Name: Dranvol Gender: Male Age: Appears to be in his early to mid twenties, but is really hundred, if not more, years old. Appearance: Loves to dress in formal wear, his clothing often being made of satin or silk. His clothes are often red, with gold leafing, a gold studded leather belt around the waist, and leather boots. Clothes often looks like this, just without the arm cape things. Has a thin, angular face, and a thin body, standing about 5 feet and 10 inches tall, with short neatly combed black hair, and gold colored eyes. Species: Demon Personality: Very sadistic, loves torturing or making deals, materialistic, self preservation is very high. Mate: None Talents: Blinking (teleporting), very strong, magic. Other: Has pet hellhounds Username: makenziec123 Name: Anatosa Gender: Female Age: looks about 20, is actually over a thousand years old Appearance: Species: Demon Personality: One of the most cruel, clever, maniacal creatures in existence Mate: open but none Talents: Can control the elements of earth and air, and can change into the form of anything so long as she has seen/touched it before. Other: Username: TomBoiiWolfie Name: Scarlet [Would've been Lupa but it could get confused with Luna...] Gender: Female Age: 22 Appearance: HUMAN: Scarlet has light brown hair that reaches around half-way down her spine and is normally left hanging loose. It goes quite well with her unusually big and bright green eyes that tend to glitter with curiosity, but also used to give glares of hatred. Her actual figure generally gives her quite a menacing look, as she is very tall (about 6 foot something), with some more muscle that you'd expect on her. However, maybe she'd be a perfect fighter if she could be more accurate, and wouldn't get hurt so easily. Scarlet wears her leather boots, a green cape with armour underneath and most of the time she carries either a dagger in a pocket of a bow and some arrows, even if she's still practicing her archery skills. WOLF: When Scarlet shifts, she's doesn't become a half man half wolf. Instead she's a full 100% wolf who runs on all fours. Her eyes change colour from green to a topaz yellow, or sometimes brown. Oddly enough her name disagrees with her fur, as it turns to a coarse smoky-black pelt. She carries only a little piece of strength on her lean body, which is held up by four tall legs. Her tail is fluffy and short, and she has pointed ears. Species: Werewolf Personality: Scarlet is one of those girls who play hard to get. She keeps to herself and prefers to be alone, generally with nature. If she ever has friends she will sacrifice a lot for them if she had to, but to avoid such troubles that's pretty much why she's alone. Scarlet doesn't mind a good fight, but knows when she might be beaten and isn't very confident at times. She can be very clumsy and end up injuring herself a lot, and when Scarlet's embarrassed her cheeks flush a bright red. When around a crush her face goes rosy, but Scarlet isn't one to love. Too much trouble, she thinks. In a team she also doesn't work well, by the way, and she has a brain that's good in inflicting abuse to annoying...people, creatures? Mate: None...So far. Talents: You could say fighting but meh. Her reflexes and reactions are definitely rapid, but it's not hard to catch her - depends. Other: Hello. I'm a noob . Username: mipuppy1 (You guys can call me Maria ^.^) Name: Calissa Griselda Gender: Female Age: Appears 18, she is really 43 Appearance: Like any succubi, Calissa is beautiful. However, instead of being beautiful is a seductive way, she looks like a delicate angel. Like if you spoke to harshly to her, she would shatter. She is short, standing at 5'2. Pale blonde hair smoothly sweeps down her back like a waterfall, her skin is a flawless porcelain, like she has never met the sun before. Her eyes are a bright blue- clear, just like the sky in a cloudless day. She is very curvy, (isn't that like a required trait for succubi?) her clothing usually consist of pretty dresses, light or dark, her favorite color is a light shade of purple. She keeps herself well covered for a succubi, wearing something tight here and there and maybe showing a big of cleavage, but she keeps it fairly modest for a succubi. The only person she seems comfortable stripping around is Dranvol. When she goes into succubus mode, she looks the same more or less but has a couple of tweaks. She sprouts bat wings and has a long black tail with a red heart shaped point, she also seems to have grown a few inches. The tips of her wings barely reaching her knee, they are usable but because she is afraid of heights, she claims they are decoration. Her nails are about two centimeters longer, and are black, sharp with a small point at the end, resembling a cat's claw. If she is angry or hungry, her normally blue eyes will turn into a demonic glowing red. Species: Succubus/Demon Personality: Looks can be deceiving? That doesn't apply to Calissa! Though she is a succubus, she isn't outgoing and social. Instead, she likes to spend her time hiding behind Dranvol and running away from any person or demon she sees. (Aside from Dranvol.) That is, to the public eye anyway, once she is in the safety of home, she is the sweetest, bubbliest girl ever. Seriously, it is very hard to believe she is a demon. She is naïve, I can't say she is completely innocent. However, when she is at the line between starving and very hungry, it is like a new personality comes out. That of a real succubus. This side of her will fight hard for her survival, she is deadly, seductive and dangerous. It doesn't matter who gets hurt as long as she gets what she needs. Mate: Dranvol Talents: She has a power over men, humans being the easiest to control. Calissa is always naturally beautiful. Other: History RPed because I'm lazy? Edited December 6, 2013 by Sylviinael Share this post Link to post
Posted September 5, 2013 On your point about dragons, A problem with this may be the elements of the dragons. While using DC dragons is completely fine, not all of them have an element and two people might have a different opinion on what element the dragon uses. For some dc dragons it is obvious what their element would be for example Ice/Magma/Thunder etc. But take the whiptail for example. What element would it have? I suggest making a list of all the dragons and categorizing them into a specific element just to prevent confusion, or perhaps removing the restriction of them having to be a DC dragon and allowing the person to freely decide the element of the dragon image they find. Or, are you allowing a race of dragons to have multiple elements? So one whiptail might be able to contol fire, another wind and another ice? Share this post Link to post
Posted September 5, 2013 On your point about dragons, A problem with this may be the elements of the dragons. While using DC dragons is completely fine, not all of them have an element and two people might have a different opinion on what element the dragon uses. For some dc dragons it is obvious what their element would be for example Ice/Magma/Thunder etc. But take the whiptail for example. What element would it have? I suggest making a list of all the dragons and categorizing them into a specific element just to prevent confusion, or perhaps removing the restriction of them having to be a DC dragon and allowing the person to freely decide the element of the dragon image they find. Or, are you allowing a race of dragons to have multiple elements? So one whiptail might be able to contol fire, another wind and another ice? Oh sorry, should've been more specific. I'm allowing a race of dragons to have multiple elements. I'll change that now. Share this post Link to post
Posted September 7, 2013 ((I'm Originally from Ireland and we spell it Magick...But I'll fix it.)) Share this post Link to post
Posted September 9, 2013 (( Still needing crits if anyone is willing to crit)) Share this post Link to post
Posted September 9, 2013 (edited) Hello there! C: This looks like a very interesting roleplay - there are just a few things that need to be fixed. Some of your sentences are very long and tend to ramble on, like this one here : "The land is very mountainous, has a large spanding forest, the cities are both near different coasts of the large Island, there are also swamps, plains, and finally the coastal trade towns all along the coasts." Instead of something like that, you could try this! (: "The land there is very mountainous, with a large spanding forest and cities near two different coasts of the large island. There are also swamps, plains, and even coastal trade towns all across the coasts." See what I mean? There are also a few numerous capitalization errors, and punctuation. Also, just one of the sentences was a bit confusing to me that you need to fix - "Their ability is to become Mages, to become magic wielders." Perhaps you could put something like this, instead? "The Human's ability is to become a Mage / Magic Wielder." There are some other things that need to be fixed; I'm sure you can find them, though. I hope this helped you out~! Edited September 9, 2013 by Pastellie Share this post Link to post
Posted September 9, 2013 (edited) Hi! I'm Greed, and while not an Approver, I can get you on your way to getting Approved. Back during Medieval times there were things that people believed didn't exist; dragons, unicorns, gryphons, centaurs, werewolves, vampires, and other mythological creatures. Medieval does not need to be capitalized. Comma after "times". Colon ( : ) instead of a semicolon ( ; ). Some people were asked if they wanted to become a Vampire or Werewolf, some weren't. Neither Vampire nor Werewolf need to be capitalized. Some were born the way they are, Hybrids or Pures. Colon instead of a comma after "are". Now a turned is someone who was born one thing, bitten by either vampire or werewolf and turned into something else. If you're keeping Pure and Hybrid capitalized, Turned needs to be capitalized as well. Neither Vampire nor Werewolf need to be capitalized. "A" vampire or "a" werewolf. Each Creature has its own sort of trait or ability that they were born with, Each one determines on what they are. For each Race its different: I'm assuming "one" means race. Neither Creature nor Race need to be capitalized. Are there limits on abilities? The first "its" is correct, while the second needs to be "it's". Now that I think on it, each /person/ determines their character's ability? Some other things: When you write, only capitalize the first word of a sentence unless you are writing someone's name or something significant. When you are explaining something to me, try not to make it as if you are talking to me. Just define what your terms are. Magick is a legitimate spelling, so you may use it if you wish. Post here when you are ready for me to continue, or if you have any questions for me. ~Greed Edited September 9, 2013 by GenerousGreed Share this post Link to post
Posted September 9, 2013 Post here when you are ready for me to continue, or if you have any questions for me. smile.gif Ready Share this post Link to post
Posted September 9, 2013 Each creature has its own sort of trait or ability that they were born with, Each one determines on what they are. Semicolon instead of a comma. Each after the semicolon does not need to be capitalized. Each one of what? For each race it's different: Comma after "race". Are each of the races limited to the abilities described, is one allowed to mix and match, is one allowed to have an original ability...? ~Greed Share this post Link to post
Posted September 10, 2013 Are each of the races limited to the abilities described, is one allowed to mix and match, is one allowed to have an original ability...? I don't understand. Share this post Link to post
Posted September 14, 2013 Ohai dere. Disclaimer: I am not an RP approver, but I have some things that you might want to change/think about so that the RP gets on its way to getting approved. I think there should be history, (you don't have to answer all of these questions) how did these creatures come to be? Did they work together? Cooperate? How do they live? Share this post Link to post
Posted September 20, 2013 I think if you're waiting too long and your RP is not getting approved that you should contact an RP approver or something like that? My bad if that's wrong. I think I heard that from somewhere. Share this post Link to post
Posted September 21, 2013 (edited) Hello! I think that this RP is very interesting. However, I personally think that you should put up the accepted characters so that we can all see who has joined, and possibly arrange things for our characters with others. E.g. Two characters being friends, family, spouse, girl/boyfriend, etc. Nonetheless, I'll be sending in a character form or two. Also, I suggest adding an age section to the character form. Edit: Ok, now that there is an age section, maybe you should get the age of the characters already made. Just saying because then it could clear some stuff up. Edited September 21, 2013 by Narath Share this post Link to post
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