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ArchiosLukos

°✵BlackStar✵°

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°✵The Story✵°

'It is always easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.'

 

Long ago there was a threat beset on our lands, the magnificent continent of Tileosia; Chaos and Law. Their personifications were caught in an eternal struggle, which brought war and distraught to the people below them; all people. These two entities were and are still known as Ailchos and Sukor. In their time they were teenagers; destructive, angry, hateful, and without reason. The two were so caught up in bickering that they did not see their own downfall. A powerful Archan by the name of Vaticinatio was sent forth by the people of the land to destroy the brothers. He was soon to be known for his extraordinary kindness and wisdom, which is preached in fables even in these centuries after. Instead of fighting the brothers, he sealed them away in an amulet to be forever trapped with each other away from the rest of the world. It worked for a couple of centuries. Disaster turned in to story and story turned in to legend. Slowly, that legend turned in to a myth and then disappeared entirely. It disappeared to everyone but a select few left to guard it. However, the brothers' brooding intensified, and their fights intensified. Soon the little pedestal they sat upon was not enough. In a blind panic, the keepers bestowed the necklace upon a young child. Potentially, this would become a normal child, but she was an Archan, descendant to Vaticinatio. The ancestry, coupled with an abnormal level of magic at birth, ensured their choice for the protectors of the necklace. She would be watched over and guarded carefully. Only one entity would be able to take over at any given time. If allowed complete control, whichever brother was left could completely transform the child's body in to his original form. If Ailchos and Sukor couldn't be contained by themselves, then perhaps this child could be.

 

Now, this child has begun to mature and the players have to choose if they let chaos or law take over or if they fight to keep the child the way it was born. Being from the underdark, you might be more inclined to bring the chaos prince to power and the other way around. Is it ethical to let this child carry the burden alone? Now, some of you may be asking how you ever happened across this child, shut away in a temple far out in the Archan Ocean. Well, there is an underdark there too that has long been forgotten by the creatures who would have been there. However, it can still be reached by any of several magical sites in the ordinary Underdark. If you don't like that, then you could be going on a trip to the earthmotes via an airship. The next problem is the temple. The Archans worship a moon and a sun goddess. This is the primary use for the temple. If you were curious enough to find the passages in to the old catacombs or happened to stumble in to it by the boarded up passages in the Underdark, then you will be able to begin your journey.

 

Let's change this to "Do whatever you want"

 

°✵The Practical✵°

‘We cannot say that if a child is badly nourished he will become a criminal. We must see what conclusion the child has drawn.’

 

[B]Forum Name:[/B]  
[B]Character Name:[/B]  
[B]Age:[/B]   
[B]Gender:[/B]   
[B]Species:[/B]  
[B]Appearance:[/B]   
[B]Personality:[/B]   
[B]History:[/B]   
[B]Extra:[/B] 

-Follow all DC forum rules.

-For Out of Character speak, use brackets. ((OOC)), [[OOC]], {{OOC}}

-No Mary Sues, Gary Stus, or Anti-Sues (Perfect characters or perfectly imperfect characters)

-No Modding (Insta-blocking, hitting, or knowing things you should not.)

-No Godmodding (Controlling another’s character or being immortal.)

-This is a family site. Do not go in to great detail over wounds or intimate acts. Try to take personal contact off camera.  

-I would like at least four detailed sentences per post. Try to limit spelling and grammar mistakes.

-PM your sheet to me

-Take quarrels to PM's, I do not want such clutter.

-Don’t kill another’s character without discussing it with them.

-Enjoy the story!

I think of RP like a chess board. It's one part strategy, one part a game for fun. Don't take my simile too literally, because obviously RP is not a competition. You aren't trying to win anything. However, you are limited in how you can move your 'pieces' because of the movements other players make and common RP courtesy, such as no powerplaying. So, unlike a solo piece of work, you really have to stop and think; you don't have complete control. You never know what will come next either, since you can't always predict how your opponent will move their pieces. RP requires quick thinking; you have to be on your toes and ready to change the course of your plans at any moment.

 

°✵The Archan Dictionary✵°

'Meanings are not determined by situations, but we determine ourselves by the meanings we give to situations.'

 

*Ailchos------- The prince of Chaos and Darkness. He is deceiving and seductive

*Archan------- A species highly accustomed to magic and technology. They are native to the floating earth motes of Tileosia. Their marble homes and great observatories are legendary. They can take the form of a winged wolf and a human. Archans can live to be thousands of years old.

*Chaos-------- The element of surprise and correlated with darkness and night in this world.

*Drow--------- Also known as Dark Elves, Drow are some of the more intelligent creatures to roam the Underdark. Drow are black-skinned, white haired, and can live to be several hundred years old

*Elf------------ The 'fair folk'. They are as tall and sometimes taller than humans and boast great intelligence where they lack durability. Elves are known for their pointed ears.

*Half-Archan-- Half-Archans are fickle things. They can be like their mother, father, or become something completely different. Angels, werewolves, demons, and other strange breeds can be blamed on Half-Archans.

*Law----------- The element of knowing and correlated with light and the sun in this world.

*Necklace----- A necklace with a small glowing blue stone where Ailchos and Sukor were imprisoned

*Slimes------- The disgusting, jelly-like inhabitants of the Underdark. They ooze or slap around and devour whatever is slow enough to be trapped in their sticky bodies.

*Sukor-------- The prince of Order and Light. He is ruthless and determined.

*Tileosia------ A lush country where all sorts of creatures live.

*Troll--------- The great barbarians of both the Overworld and the Underdark. They are grotesque and stupid, trampling over everything in their path.

*Underdark--- The vast system of tunnels and caverns crossing under all of Tileosia. Most creatures that are considered 'vile' live here.

Edited by ArchiosLukos

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°✵Character Sheets✵°

 

Greenking13

Character Name:  Nicolas A.

Age:  Supposedly 20 years old, but nobody is certain if this true.

Gender:  Male

Species:  Half-Archan(The Second Half is currently unknown.)

Appearance:  What he looks like

Personality:  Even though his face may give the impression of kindness, he is at most times, a person who is very mysterious. He is kind, but because of his past he keeps it buried deep inside of himself. Nick is always willing to fight, even if the fight appears to be lost cause.

History:  His mother is Vardra Driad (Dree-aad) is a full-blooded Archan. His father though, is a complete mystery. Nick grew up as an outcast because of his mixed heritage, and was at most times an object of ridicule of the other children. On one such occasion, around the time he was nine years old, he got incredible upset at one of the particular children and blew him away. Not as in beat the child to a pulp, but used the air currents to lift the child off the ground and toss him a couple of blocks away.

After the occasion, the other children left him alone and he became even more of an outcast, sometimes even avoiding them entirely. As he grew up, his talent with air became even more apparent, to the point where he could easily float on the air currents. With his growing talent though, there came the growing speculation of what Nick's could father have been. Because of this, Nick decided to eventually leave the Archan Island and is now somewhere on the mainland.

Extra: As stated above, he does have the power to control air, or Air Manipulation, and it is rumored that he can conjure blue fire. (Left=Normal Right=What his sometimes looks like) Also, he loves strawberries.

 

RainDash

Forum Name:  RainDash

Character Name:  Tak'ra Draven

Age:   50

Gender:   Female

Species:  Drow

Appearance:   Like all Drow, she has dark grey skin and white hair. However, he face is distinctly pointed and sharp, and her eyes are violet. Due to going above ground a lot, she wears a red bandana around her neck. She wears simple leather armor, and a hood for good measure. When her hair is out, it is brought back into a tight braid and kept out of her face. some say that her eyes sparkle with a certain mischievousness.

Personality:   Despite being raised to hate the people who lived above, Tak'ra went into the towns to see. Curious by nature, Tak'ra will push the limits of rules or bend them until they break. If she appears evil, it's not on purpose. She likes to make bad deals with fools, but that's merely to be able to buy Overworld food, of which is her favorite. She can act extremely naive about various terms, or extremely knowledgeable about them, depending upon if she's heard of them or not.

History:   Tak'ra had a relatively normal Drow childhood. Until the day she was wandering the Underdark and got lost. She exited through an entrance for the Temple for the Sun and Moon gods of the Archans. She left shortly after pilfering most of the books that the temple had, and took them home. After being grounded and punished, she stole back the books from her parents and has been fascinated by the Overworld ever since.

Extra: Tak'ra doesn't know what pudding is.

 

Waterdragon123

Forum Name:  waterdragon123

Character Name:  Nephia

Age: about 100 years old

Gender:  female

Species: elf

Appearance: A bit tan skin. Dark brown hair that curls at the ends. Hair ends had the end of rib cage. Big, kind, amber-orange eyes with long lashes. And of course pointy ears.

Personality:  Intelligent, thinks twice about things, kind,  jumpy, fearful, mischievous, bad at making jokes, thinks she is very  funny but is not.

History:  [[Father-dead  Mother-unknown]] Was found by Eternity Lake when four years old and was very sick. Elves brought her back to Neseer and healed her but the sickness disabled her from using her her left arm and it has never been restored.

Extra: She thinks knock-knock jokes are funny

Edited by ArchiosLukos

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°✵Tileosia✵°

[satellite View]

[Regions and Landmarks]

 

Tileosia is a vast land that travelers of the universe often compare to the fictional Narnia and Middle Earth. It is filled to the brim with mythical and normal creatures, all of which are charming and sprightly. That is, unless you go to a place called the underdark.

 

Archan Ocean

- A void on the eastern side of the world where the Archans originate. It is completely desolate other than the occasional abandoned island and the great floating city the Archan's inhabit. Outside of the islands, the winds are vicious and would shred a person to unrecognizable pieces. This has made it nearly impossible for anyone to attack the Archans unless one of the airships built by the ocean’s inhabitants escorted them.

 

~Archan Island- an island in the void housing a technologically saturated race.

--Lake Vati- A lake named after the famous Vaticinatio who was known to be a wise scholar and warrior. The water is said to have magical properties.

--Main City- A city entirely composed of marble and stone. It is beautiful and boasts many intellectual attractions.

--Temple of Moon and Sun- A temple erected for worship of the goddess Lassiar, simmilar to a goddess worshiped by the ancient desert humans.

 

Overworld

-A huge landmass that appears to be completely solid. However, it is actually a massive island in the void of space surrounded by its own atmosphere. The edges are surrounded by oceans of saltwater that eventually fall off the edge of the 'world' and become misty waterfalls. This is all but the eastern side, which is a void of crisp blue air and clouds. This is where the Archan's homeland, the earthmotes, resides. Otherwise, there are scattered kingdoms. It is a young world with little technology and sprawling countryside.

 

~Arabian Desert- South most desert in Tileosia. It is brimming with trade and towns.

--Anzi's Palace- A palace built long ago to accommodate the Pharaohs of Argania.

--Argania- A desert city made of dried clay and sandstone. It is heavy with trade and mostly populated my humans.

--Armos Tribe- A small tribe of dog-folk arranged around an oasis. They deal in exotic avians, reptiles, and medical herbs.

--Santek Tribe- A small tribe of cat-folk arrange around an oasis. They deal in exotic mammals, desert artifacts, and poisons.

--Sun Temple- A temple erected long ago for worship of the sun god Lacuir, simmilar to a goddess worshiped by the Archans.

--Tek- The desert part of the Rimorum Flow. It provides rich farming grounds for up to several miles from its banks.

 

~BlackStar- A star far out in the void that appears to be pitch black. A black and white island circles it.

--Ailchos Island- An island of obsidian colored grass and odd, razor-like flora. A great temple stands to one end.

--Sukor Island- An island of eggshell colored grass and odd, geometrical flora. A great temple stands to one end.

 

~Dragon Jungle- A dense and dangerous jungle known for its reptilian inhabitants.

--Half-Dragon Temples- Temples, Mayan in appearance. They house thousands of Human/Dragon hybrids along with their reptilian kin.

 

~Drow Forest- A dark forest dense with blackened trees. Foul things roam the pines.

 

~Dwarven Mountains- A small mountain range consisting of three massive peaks. Dwarves inhabit the rock.

--Oxgate- The great Dwarven city of Oxgate. It is deep underground and leaning off the side of Tileosia. Anyone with a good deal of money or trade is welcome.

 

~Eldaron- A lush forest brimming with creatures, Humans, Elves, Sprites, and others alike.

--Bermue- An elven city high in the trees. The inhabitants tend to be unsociable unless visitors are of elven kind. Their sister city is Neseer.

--Eddenburgh- A human city where most travelers stay to rest. They deal primarily in lumber, but the inns and shops provide well enough. It is a quiet town.

--Neseer- A city among the tall oaks sporting a lively Elven crowd. The inhabitants invite anyone with a few gold pieces and a story to tell. Their sister city is Bermue.

--Pixie Lands- A part of the forest turned eternally autumn. Travelers steer clear lest a Dryad or a mischievous Sprite entrance them.

 

~Fey Link- A forest inhabited with creatures of the Fey. Unicorns, Dryads, Naiads, Griffons, and other mythological beasts live here.

 

~Glasslands- A stretch of land covered by rugged black glass. Two volcanoes sit at the far end.

--Ignis' Temple- A temple erected to the god Ignis. It stands nearly in ruins, bombarded by constant heat from the Lava Pits.

--Lava Pits- A section of the Glasslands dotted with pits of lava. Narrow streams or untouched land run through it.

--Mt. Flamma- The little sister of Mt. Ignis. Mt. Flamma is an active volcano dwarfed by its massive brother.

--Mt. Ignis- The big brother of Mr.Flamma. Mt. Ignis is an active volcano looming over its petite sister.

--Underdark Ravine- A long vein in to the land, leading to the Underdark. Foul creatures sometimes venture out in to the scorched land from it.

 

~Great Savannah- A large savannah covering almost the entire of the known Northern World. Many Animal Folk and tribes live here.

--Eternitu Lake- A lake that feeds in to the Rimorum Flow. It storms constantly but provides wonderful fishing.

 

~Halfling Hills- The hilly stretch just off of the Open Lands. Halflings, also known as Hobbits, live in the sides of the hills.

 

~Human Lands- The entire open quadrant east of the Rimorum Flow. Humans have scattered kingdoms and various lords fighting for dominance.

 

~Merdell- A great Human fortress at the NE tip of Tileosia. Cut off from the rest of the known world by strange mist and mountains, they rely on only themselves now that the warring ages are done. Visitors are rare and bring as much excitement as a new king.

 

~Merian Waterlock- A sea to the west of the misty cliff, which traps storms in the Lock. The basin can reach several miles deep, but tends to be shallow. Merpeople and other aquatic creatures make their home here.

--Dragon Rock- A cluster of sharp rocks jutting out of the water. It is famous for wrecking ships and no land dweller has seen inside for decades.

--Storm Jovah- A hurricane running eternally in the south corner of the Merian Waterlock. No one knows what resides in the eye of the storm.

 

~Shrieking Desert- A barren desert with fierce sandstorms and no signs of civilization.

-- City of Thieves- A city in the middle of the Shrieking desert known for carrying anything you could ever need or want. How they get their merchandise through the desert is unknown. There are rumors of portals in unlikely places.

 

~Swamp of Souls-

-- A murky swamp widely believed to be haunted. It is said that dead faces appear in the water and lights strand visitors. Travelers steer clear to avoid their own deaths.

 

~Thunder Plains- A plains elevated above sheer cliffs. Lightning has a habit of striking there often, leaving blackened grass and trees.

--Love Point- The NW most point of Tileosia where truly adventurous couples go to prove their devotion. It is known to be the grave of more than one pair of souls.

 

~Wetlands- A part of the Human lands near the Northern Cliff that is flooded with water.

 

~Winter Taiga- The Drow Forest's twin. It is heavily populated with pines burdened by snow. Winter creatures live here and wolves run rampant.

 

Underdark

-An expanse of widely unexplored tunnels and caverns under Tileosia that is pitch black other than the occasional cluster of bioluminescent mushrooms or a Troll city. Everything in the Underdark tends to be grotesque or downright evil. The most famous examples are Drow, Trolls, Cave Ogres, and Slimes. The only way to reach it is through ravines and deep caves, which are guarded by the Underdark's various inhabitants.

 

~No Data

Edited by ArchiosLukos

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Hello, sorry it took so long for me to reply.~ Here's what I see:

 

~I think you should add more description of what the land itself is like. Are there established cities? You mention Tileosia and the floating islands, but where are those islands located compared to other inhabited places? What intelligent species live in the cities, if there are cities? Are all animals regular animals from earth, or are there some strange and magical creatures there as well? Do Archans live longer than humans? Can someone be half-Archan?

 

Long ago there was a threat beset on our lands.
What lands are we speaking of?

 

It disappeared to everyone but a select few left to guard it. However, their brooding intensified, their fights intensified.
This makes it seem like the brooding and fights were done by those left to guard it; in the second sentence instead of using 'their' the first time, use the names of the entities.

 

The ancestry, coupled with an abnormal level of magic at birth, sealed it for the protectors of the necklace. She would be watched over and guarded carefully.
What do you mean by 'sealed it' here?

 

Only one entity would be able to take over at any given time and it would be over her body.
This seems a bit confusing to me. I get what it means, but perhaps you could use a few more sentences to explain. Mention the entities' names (Ailchos and Sukor) and clarify whether you mean the entity literally takes over her consciousness or just changes her personality to suite his side (Chaos or Order).

 

Now, this child has begun to mature and the protagonists have to choose if they let either side take over or if they fight it.
Are the 'protagonists' the role-players? How are they chosen, and what do you mean by 'or if they fight it'. I think this is your main plot, but you should split this off and make a new paragraph that explains how the RP is going to work (give it a bit more direction, so RPers aren't just thrust into the world with no idea what they're supposed to do).

 

That's all I got so far. Not a bad start at all, it's definitely an interesting storyline. smile.gif

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~You mention Drow and Trolls and such now. Are you going to leave details about those races up to the RPers? If so, everything is fine as it is. However, if you want there to be certain guidelines/explanations to their life-span, appearance, lifestyle and other details, you should probably state them.

 

~Are there other races or are all the mentioned ones the only ones? What races can a player be?

 

In their time, they were teenagers, destructive, angry, hateful, and without reason.
Delete the comma after "time", and change the comma after "teenagers" to a colon.

 

However, the brother's brooding intensified, their fights intensified.
Apostrophe in "brother's" should go after the 's'.

 

Is it ethical to let this child carry the burden alone.

Should have a question mark at the end.

 

With these things fixed and the questions answered, you're almost ready to go. smile.gif

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I'm afraid I don't have the power to move roleplays to freeform (don't ask me why), so I'll go ahead and approve this to other. Have fun roleplaying!

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