Posted March 26, 2012 Hi everyone! I have recently started writing a story called "Shattered". The link to it is here:Shattered Feel free to comment on it, I would love to hear constructive critiscm. Thanks! Share this post Link to post
Posted March 28, 2012 Don't know why you don't have any comments here yet, I liked it! Your writing style could use quite a bit of work. I'd honestly just suggest practice. You conversations tend to come in a huge block with nothing in between, telling you what the characters are doing or anything. But there is also a lack of real emotion and feeling in the story. It feels like you're just doing a shopping list of what happened rather than telling it. But I like the story idea itself. The beginning especially. It sounds really cool. c: I have seen stories that are kind of like that, but they're always fun. <3 I'd really love to see you finish this. Share this post Link to post
Posted March 28, 2012 Thanks! It's just my first draft and all my real life friend's aren't writers I think you're right though- I'll edit it when I have time. Share this post Link to post
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