The Great Flame

[thegreenrobby]

Unfortunately, I won't be able to start this RP. As of late, I just got accepted to a handful of other new RP's, as well as I have problems at home and in school. So, this will not be played for a while. Sorry.

Story:

 

The Flame is coming…

 

Medieval Earth: the land of freedom. Many enjoyed the magnificent scene: Dragons freely roamed the land alongside the ever-growing humans. However, one man despised the great beasts. He loathed them. His name was Borin Flamesworth, who lived in the great country by the name of Barinata. One day, he decided to destroy the dragons, once and for all.

His plan was rather cunning. He, along with countless slaves and servants, dug out a society of tunnels, caverns, and caves, all hidden underground, with only a few entrances, but plenty of supporting pillars (to keep any of it from caving in). Next, he went out deep into the forest, and started countless fires, one after another, in various places throughout it. The forest quickly caught ablaze as Borin hustled out. Most of the forest’s inhabitants died out; only a few managed to escape. This, however, was not the true plan to destroy the dragons. The fire quickly spread to cover the entire forest.

Borin revealed his system of tunnels to the public, allowing all humans in the country inside for safety. However, he would NOT let any dragons in. They would all burn away.

This is where we are.

 

Roles: (Choose one when creating a character.)

 

You are a dragon. You must find a way inside the tunnels, find other means of refuge, or put out the fire.

 

You are a positive human. You are safe in the bunker, but you like the dragons and don’t want them to die. You must find a way to keep them safe, whilst keeping yourself safe.

 

You are a negative human. You despise the dragons (or are atleast a strict rule-follower) and you want to keep the dragons out. You must keep them out without getting yourself burned.

 

Map:

*Currently being made, please bear with me...*

 

Form:

[b] Forum Name: [/b]
[b] Character Name: [/b]
[b] Character Type: [/b]  ( +Human, -Human, Dragon )
[b] Age: [/b]
[b] Desciption: [/b] (Include Physical AND mental, be sure to make it atleast 2-3 paragraphs. This is a Literate/Semi-lit RP.)
[b] What’s the Magic Word? [/b]

The Rules:

1.) Limit swearing, profanity, etc. PG-13 is the limit, here.

2.) Be nice; do not troll other players.

3.) No Powerplaying, Godmodding, Mary/Gary sues, etc.

5.) Use proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation. It hurts my eyes if you don’t! Q_Q

6.) Put OoC comments in (()).

7.) You have to be a DC dragon, or a medieval-like human. A small list of dragons you CAN'T be, though. You can't be something immune to fire, obviously, and you MUST be a dragon that has to breath air and NOT live on water. You can't be animated dragons, like cheese or paper. Dinos and rares are OK.

8.) I skipped the number of a rule. This missing number is the magic word.

9.) Put a few decent sentences per post. I don’t want one liners. This is a semi-lit/lit RP. I don’t want something like “Run from fire” or something like that.

10.) Have fun. Or ELSE!

Edited March 15, 2012 by thegreenrobby

[TSparkle123]

Story:

 

The Flame is coming…

 

Medieval Earth: the land of freedom. Many enjoyed the magnificent scene. Dragons freely roamed the land alongside the ever-growing humans. However, one man despised the great beasts. He loathed them. His name was Borin Flamesworth, who lives in the great country by the name of Barinata. One day, he decided to destroy the dragons, once and for all.

His plan was rather cunning. He, along with countless slaves and servants, dug out a society of tunnels, caverns, and caves, all hidden underground, with only a few entrances, but plenty of supporting pillars (To keep any of it from caving in.) Next, he went out deep into the forest, and started countless fires, one after another, in various places throughout it. The forest quickly caught ablaze as Borin hustled out. Most of the forest’s inhabitants died out, only a few managed to escape. This, however, was not the true plan to destroy the dragons. The fire quickly spread the cover the entire forest.

Borin revealed his system of tunnels to the public, allowing all humans in their country inside for safety. However, he would NOT let any dragons in. They would all burn away.

This is where we are.

 

Roles: (Choose one when creating a character.)

 

You are a dragon. You must find a way inside the tunnels, find other means of refuge, or put out the fire.

 

You are a positive human. You are safe in the bunker, but you like the dragons and don’t want them to die. You must find a way to keep them safe, whilst keeping yourself safe.

 

You are a negative human. You despise the dragons, (Or are atleast a strict rule-follower) and you want to keep the dragons out. You must keep them out without getting yourself burned.

 

Map:

*Currently being made, please bear with me...*

 

Form:

The form is not yet available. If you want to be accepted into the game, please contact me via PM.

 

The Rules:

1.) Limit swearing, profanity, etc. PG-13 is the limit, here.

2.) Be nice; do not troll other players.

3.) No Powerplaying, Godmodding, Mary/Gary sues, etc.

5.) Use proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation. It hurts my eyes if you don’t! Q_Q

6.) Put OoC comments in (()).

7.) You have to be a DC dragon, or a medieval-like human.

8.) I forgot a number of a rule. This missing number is the password.

9.) Put a few decent sentences per post. I don’t want one liners. This is a semi-lit/lit RP. I don’t want something like “Shoot with arrow” or something like that.

10.) Have fun. Or ELSE!

Cool idea!! I know you probably wanted a better comment than this, but I didn't really see anything worthy of critisizing (I know it's spelt wrong, but it's 9:00 Rocky Mtn. Time. What do you want?) or changing. And I saw that it had 20 some views and no comments, someone should have said something! I'll probably PM you later to join the game.

[thegreenrobby]

Cool idea!! I know you probably wanted a better comment than this, but I didn't really see anything worthy of critisizing (I know it's spelt wrong, but it's 9:00 Rocky Mtn. Time. What do you want?) or changing. And I saw that it had 20 some views and no comments, someone should have said something! I'll probably PM you later to join the game.

Well, gosh!

*Blush*

It's nice to know someone likes it! I was starting to worry a little bit.

Yeah, feel free to PM me. I will respond to it ASAP.

And hey! I live in Rocky Mountain Time, too! Arizona, baby!

[Tiffashy]

Well I do have a few questions in minds when I read the plot.

 

Wouldn't the dragons move to a different forest or perhaps live in the mountains?

 

There are some fire breed dragons so aren't they fire proof or something thanks for their hard scales?

 

He, along with countless slaves and servants, dug out a society of tunnels, caverns, and caves, all hidden underground...

Why did he? Is that apart of the plans?

 

What happens after the dragons find a safe place? Is that were the RP stops?

 

[thegreenrobby]

Well I do have a few questions in minds when I read the plot.

 

Wouldn't the dragons move to a different forest or perhaps live in the mountains?

 

There are some fire breed dragons so aren't they fire proof or something thanks for their hard scales?

 

 

Why did he? Is that apart of the plans?

 

What happens after the dragons find a safe place? Is that were the RP stops?

1. The country in description has no mountains. It is somewhat of a rounded peninsula, with water covering most sides, and a desert covering the last side. See the map once I get it up.

 

2. I think I'll ban those breeds of dragons. Can you list them for me?

-Volcano

-Magma

-What else?

 

3. Yes, it is. It is to protect the human citizens from the fire.

 

4. No. They must try their best to endure there. If in the tunnels, they must lay low while searching for food until the fire burns out.

 

I think I'll make a few minor adjustments to the story to help you understand it better.

[soupnazi]

Well, I do think there's a bit of critique I need to do, but overall it's a nice looking roleplay.

 

Medieval Earth: the land of freedom.

 

Forgive me if I'm wrong, but wasn't medieval Earth very much not free? Slavery, feudalism, all that.

 

Many enjoyed the magnificent scene.

 

I do not understand what this means.

 

His name was Borin Flamesworth, who lives in the great country by the name of Barinata.

 

I believe you meant "lived", not "lives".

 

His plan was rather cunning. He, along with countless slaves and servants, dug out a society of tunnels, caverns, and caves, all hidden underground, with only a few entrances, but plenty of supporting pillars (To keep any of it from caving in.)

 

"To" should not be capitalized, and the period should be outside the parentheses.

 

Most of the forest’s inhabitants died out, only a few managed to escape.

 

Either "managed" should be "managing", or the comma should be a semicolon.

 

The fire quickly spread the cover the entire forest.

 

I believe the first "the" should be "to".

 

You despise the dragons, (Or are atleast a strict rule-follower) and you want to keep the dragons out.

 

The parentheses need to go before the comma, and "Or" should not be capitalized.

 

And that's about it! I'll want to wait for the map to get up just to make sure everything's ready, and then approval should come quick.

[thegreenrobby]

Thanks for the critique, Soup.

Y'now, I had put some critique into other un-approved RPs, but it feels strange to have the tables turned like that.

To clear up on

Many enjoyed the magnificent scene.

I refer to the sence described the next line. Maybe I should change that period to a colon?

Edited March 7, 2012 by thegreenrobby

[thegreenrobby]

Also, I fixed the title on top.

[soupnazi]

Yeah, getting critique always feels weird. (What, I made a mistake? No!)

 

If the "scene" bit is referring to the dragons, a colon or something would help.

 

In addition to the map, a brief description of the country(ies), its/their government, its/their rulers, and null/their differences in laws (if there are any) would be good for reference.

[sailing101]

What keeps the fire from burning itself out after a few days?

[thegreenrobby]

What keeps the fire from burning itself out after a few days?

Simply because there is still plenty to burn. The fire will start in the forest, and then eventually will cover the entire country. I mean, the starting place may die out before that happens, but there will be a large ring of fire surrounding it, so it's unlikely that someone will manage to get there without burning themselves, though.

Edited March 8, 2012 by thegreenrobby

[sailing101]

So, basically every dragon with wings or that can swim will be fine then.... Meaning that they wouldn't need to get into the cave.

 

And it could still rain.

 

Edited March 8, 2012 by sailing101

[thegreenrobby]

So, basically every dragon with wings or that can swim will be fine then.... Meaning that they wouldn't need to get into the cave.

 

And it could still rain.

First of all, all dragons that live in the water are banned, and there is no way that someone can fly or swim for days straight while the fire goes out.

 

And, I'm the OP here, I can control if it rains of not!

Edited March 9, 2012 by thegreenrobby

[gistofeverything]

Hello, I'm gistofeverything, and this RP looks good~

 

Many enjoyed the magnificent scene. Dragons freely roamed the land alongside the ever-growing humans.

Combine these sentences by: "...scene: dragons...", and I'll Approve~

[thegreenrobby]

Hello, I'm gistofeverything, and this RP looks good~

 

 

Combine these sentences by: "...scene: dragons...", and I'll Approve~

Oh yeah! I had plans to do that, but it never happened.

*Fixes*

[gistofeverything]

Approved~ Make sure to make a form, now~!

[thegreenrobby]

I had already made one, and had actually sent it out to a couple of interested people.

[Chasilin]

"Milady! Milady, stay close, the fire's are coming!" Screamed a feather ruffled ninny who was only helping Liel for selfish reasons. Liel was obediant though, she an as fast as her little legs could cary her, her Great Dane, Dragon, stuck at her side protectively. Cherry brown hair, tucked in braids and natrurally twisting curls, flew back in a flurry behind the tiny fleeing frame of the young girl.

 

Finally, the woman took off screaming as soon as the entrance to the underground tunnels appeared, because of Liel's social standing, she was granted permission to enter first. Behind Liel there were poor children, women and men coughing and dragging their trembling work-fatigued bodies to the safety that may or may not harbor them.

 

With a pout, Liel stiffly stuck her heel into the ground and made tiny ball's of fists as she pivoted sharply, her hair turning around her and twirrling in the same way her dress did at her waist. Just as she was about to call out, she realized she hadn't stopped spinning properly and the next thing she knew, was the taste of the earth in her mouth. Liel was still a ways away from the entrance to the tunnels, but now she was stuck in the dirt by her own clumsiness. What was she going to do?

 

 

------------

 

 

 

Angry flames cackled in their rage as they grew and grew to devour everything in their path. Waves upon waves of the human-made fire stirred up throughout the forest, burning, breaking, killing everythng it could wrap it's scortching death vice around. It was unbiased as it rose and fell in a dance that was unmatched and un rivaled by anything but water. But there was no water here to stop them, so they danced on to their own melody and, as the fire danced, it tip-toed into each clearing, it broke down every sturdy tree, engulfed fields of flowers and tore families of animals apart, perhaps for eternity.

 

It was enchanting, but it was also frightening, and the fire's current target was a small dragon's cave inhabited by a young and aloof Ocherdrake. This said ocherdrake emerged from his den to discover his company but he was not planning on watching the performance of his own death. His own natural instincs kicked in, and kicked him out. Taking to the air the ochredrake cast a sadened look to his home and witnessed it's spectacular demise as it partook in the grand waltz of the fires until it was rudeced to glosing embers a hacking puffs of dark smoke. Unsure where to go, the ocheredrake began to fly in the first direction he thought to go and the longer he flew, the more of the devestation he could see.

 

Forest animals were calling out in terrifying screams of pain and misery from the abyss of angry scortching trees, who had also come to join the mass event. After a while he saw other dragons, now homeless and taking to the skies, with burns or scars for trying to escape the wrath which raged below them. More and more continued to appear, their retreating figures peeking out between the smoke darkened clouds. Despite there being so many dragons in the sky, the ochredrake felt very, very alone.

 

 

 

------------

 

 

 

Danzo growled under his breath in displeasure to his current surroundings beneath the earth.- "I don't see why we must be cooped up in some filthy hovel."-complained the ever nit picky perfectionist as he picked up his cat, Sterla, and began to pet her in his fury. She mewled uncomfortably but she was just as annoyed so she let him do as he please, she even threw in a lengthy purr for his benefit. It worked, Danzo was soothed and he let his pet down and looked around.-

 

"Where is that damned Liel-Roze, anyway? I'd quite like to get on to verbally beating her about, it would really help my stress level." He had his hands tossed out to the side as if he were statting it 'matter-of-factly', his arms then folded and he took on a dangerous look to his eyes.- "She better show up soon, that brat."

 

((First post?))

Edited March 10, 2012 by Chasilin

[thegreenrobby]

((Nice. Maybe I should get to making and writing about my own character, at that.))

Edited March 10, 2012 by thegreenrobby

[Chasilin]

((fufufu yes, I think you should~ It wouldn't be very entertaining to RP with myself...I know from experience >.> hahahahahaha))

[girlfairy76]

((Oh we can start? I didnt know xP))

[thegreenrobby]

((Well, I was going to wait for a few more people to join...

but whatever. You can RP if you want, I guess.))

[Chasilin]

((Oops...>.<"))

[thegreenrobby]

((It's OK. You can start if you want, but I don't think it'll be too fun to do it yourself.))

[Chasilin]

((haha yeah, I'm the only one who's posted, anyway x3 At least, this way, you can wait like you wanted to. Sorry by the way, I'm always too hasty v.v))