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I have to agree that it feels like bullying.

 

I have a strange body type. I'm very lean, but I have muscle mass that I carry in 'unfeminine' places--stronger shoulders/arms/upper torso than the average girl. I can't count the number of times I've been told I 'look like a drag queen' or I look like I'm on steroids, or that I should 'work on trying not to bulk up like that' or that I should eat more fat to gain some hips. Those kinds of comments seem to come more often from curvy girls, or from girls that have been heavier and have lost weight, and it feels like them saying to me that my natural body type is unattractive and that I should try to change it. Sure, there's societal pressure to be skinny and healthy, but if you are skinny and healthy (I would consider having enough muscle to lift something heavy as 'healthy') there's pressure to stop looking 'unnatural' or like 'a work-out freak'. And I don't even work out, because all that pressure has made me concerned about gaining any more muscle.

 

So I guess my point is that no matter what kind of body type you have, someone will bully you for it, and probably with the motivation to make themselves feel better about their own bodies.

Edited by Sadako

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I'm a UK 14 and have recently (last 12 months gone from a UK 12) and have been a 12 since I was around 11 years old (I was already 6 foot back then). I am happy with my size I am with in the "ideal" limits of my height and can still look sexy if I so choose to.

 

In all honesty I find the tiny skinny models unattractive and have a temption to feed them cake

xd.png @ feed them cake.

 

I'm 5'6" and a 12 - 14 UK size... I'd like to get back to a real size 12 as my clothes fitted better rolleyes.gif but I really don't mind not being the size 10 that I was 7 years ago. I'm happier and look healthier being slightly bigger.

 

TD.x.

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I'm a size 0 and 5'8". I'm so glad that you brought this side of the debate/topic thing up (not just saying that smaller women are ugly and anorexic and fake). I've always been thin. I don't starve myself, and I don't have an eating disorder. I don't try to be thin. I just am. I wish people would start to realize that.

 

@Sadako: I get that sometimes, too. I'm a fencer, so I have very muscular shoulders and arms, especially for my body type. Think what Madonna's arms look like (though maybe not that much lol). And I usually get teased by curvier girls, too.

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I'm an Australian size 10-12 (sometimes an 8 if it's a big 8) which is an American 4-8 I believe. It sucks that society places so much pressure on people for being overweight. I cannot judge anyone for their weight; I find it impossible to do so cause weight should not be a standard to judge a person's character.

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When it comes to size, I'm usually a womens small-medium or a juniors medium-XL (US). Not sure about dress size as I rarely try them on. My weight tends to hover between 120-130. I, in general, dislike any model profiling. Most of my life I've been on the shorter end of the height spectrum, so being a model was never possible.

 

It's good to hear that people are embracing plus size modeling more today. I do not like the size 0 stereotypical model. If people could become models based on technique and personality rather than their outer appearances it would be a nicer world.

Edited by Daydreamer09

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Personally I'm a size 10 UK which I guess makes a US size 8, but I'm quite short so I'm not skinny skinny. I don't eat particularly healthy but then I dont eat big portions and stay away from ready meals. I think being vegetarian also helps, the meat substitutes generally have less fat in them, then I'm also not tempted when I'm feeling lazy just just eat McDonald's or something.

 

I think the UK as a whole isn't AS weight loss obsessed as America but its still pretty up there. I think people here are more concerned about obesity and it's effect on your health.

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I'm a UK size 6, I would like to put on a little bit of weight, but I can't.

Why not?

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I'm a UK size 6, I would like to put on a little bit of weight, but I can't.

I had the same trouble when I was younger.. I felt like a stick and I hated it.

 

 

Kestra15 Some people just can't put weight on, (no matter how much cake they eat lol) they're natural state is to be "thinner" than most others. It's annoying being skinny, sometimes clothes don't hang right and you feel the cold so much more sad.gif

 

TD.x.

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Kestra15  Some people just can't put weight on, (no matter how much cake they eat lol) they're natural state is to be "thinner" than most others.  It's annoying being skinny, sometimes clothes don't hang right and you feel the cold so much more  sad.gif

 

TD.x.

Yes, I know that, funnily enough - nutrition *is* a basic part of nursing. Thing is, most everyone can put on weight, it just requires a bit more (well, ironically, less) work that others. Hence asking why they think they cannot put on weight - it may be indeed be that it's because they're going about it the 'wrong way.'

 

After all, the way to put on weight is to ensure your energy output is lower than your energy input. I will lay any money that anyone who sits around all day and gets through five Big Macs at dinner and two large portion of chips every time they get the munchies will indeed put on weight.

Edited by Kestra15

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Why not?

Well I've got braces so I don't eat sugary food and I was fatter when I did eat sugary food but now I can't and no matter how much I eat I just can't put on weight.

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I had the same trouble when I was younger.. I felt like a stick and I hated it.

 

 

Kestra15 Some people just can't put weight on, (no matter how much cake they eat lol) they're natural state is to be "thinner" than most others. It's annoying being skinny, sometimes clothes don't hang right and you feel the cold so much more sad.gif

 

TD.x.

Yeah, I'm only 14 and don't eat particularly healthily or do exercise, I just seem to be stuck at this weight at the moment.

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Food for thought:

 

I am now 46. When I was 16 I had very nice buxom figure. I'm white, but I had a large bust and a "booty". I started developing when I was 9, and by 12, from the neck down, I looked very adult.

 

I was surrounded by undeveloped girls, and they all thought I was fat. My family thought I was fat. I thought I was fat. I'd been put on all kinds of diets since I was 9, was teased constantly, and by the time I was 16 was very depressed and had a horrible view of myself. And male attention just made me feel more insecure.

 

I look back on pictures from that time, and WOW...I actually looked GOOD!! I was not fat, but I had more "stuff" than the other girls, and it was either jealousy and/or warped view on both their part AND my families. There was nothing wrong with me. I was simply healthy and built. I understand now why guys buzzed around me. Back then, I thought they were mocking me.

 

When I was 18 (still with a horrible view of myself) my thyroid started failing. The thyroid is what regulates your metabolism. I became Hypothyroid, (as opposed to HyPERthyroid, which it works overtime). NOW I started to put on REAL fat. I had been fighting imaginary weight all my life (thanks to family and peers) and now I was fighting REAL weight.

 

I didn't get diagnosed until I was in my mid-20's, and started meds. but by then I was obese and it's been a struggle ever since.

 

I eat healthy, and I love veggies. I do not hardly ever drink soda, or sugary stuff, or scarf down twinkies and such. I try to exercise as much as I physically can. It's hard and disheartening when you exhaust yourself, yet it doesn't do much good.

 

Yet, even now, my family obsesses over what goes in my mouth, and constantly harasses me about "getting down", even tho they know about my condition and meds. They are convinced it's a minor contributor. It's gotta be what I eat. I do not go to family dinners or parties anymore.

 

People who just see me on the street, assume it's food too.

 

MY POINT of all this, is do NOT assume, when you see a large person, that they are fat thru being lazy, bad diet, etc. There ARE medical problems that MAKE you fat, no matter what you do. It's an ongoing struggle for many people. And it starts when we are kids. Never assume.

 

If this makes even one of you view that large kid in your class, or workplace a little differently (positive) then good. Try to be a bit more charitable. You never know what they are going thru. It might not be anything they really can help.

 

EDIT: And, I am sure the same thing in reverse can apply to many really skinny people. They probably are NOT anorexic, or bulemic. It could be a permanent medical issue, they will struggle with all their lives.

 

I do not let this upset me anymore. It did for many many years. My families inability to understand is what hurt the most, even more than the disdain of my peers. But now, I have this certain way of dealing with it, when I am confronted with this horrible form of predjudice. Here’s an example:

 

I was in a store recently. I passed by a small group of teenage girls, who looked at me and giggled. I looked directly back at them. One of them, a bold little thing who obviously thought she was being clever, said “God, you are FAT!” She was probably expecting me to burst into tears, or see my face fall in shame. I just looked steadly back at her, and said calmly “Yes, I am. But, I do wonder, hon, just why you needed to point that out? What is going on in your life that is so hurtful to you, that you feel you need to try to hurt me back just to make yourself feel better?” The look on her face was priceless, along with the others. They looked a bit shamed and quickly left my vincinity.

 

Again, NEVER assume. Peace, ya'll!! cool.gif

Edited by Riverwillows

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size 0 is just so dam creepy skinny a little fat is good on a woman

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size 0 is just so dam creepy skinny a little fat is good on a woman

Excuse me, one of my friends have a thyroid problem and she just can't get fat. I'm sorry but that would be a bit offensive for her, wouldn't it? She doesn't want to be size 0 (more like size minus from my point of view but still), it's not any of her concern and it's not up to you to judge her.

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Excuse me, one of my friends have a thyroid problem and she just can't get fat. I'm sorry but that would be a bit offensive for her, wouldn't it? She doesn't want to be size 0 (more like size minus from my point of view but still), it's not any of her concern and it's not up to you to judge her.

I'm saying i don't like skinny women i really don't care if it offends your friend it isn't going to change my opinion

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I'm saying i don't like skinny women i really don't care if it offends your friend it isn't going to change my opinion

That doesn't make her less of a woman, which is the point of this thread. And instead of using the word creepy you could have just said that you prefer women with more meat on them.

Edited by ylangylang

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That doesn't make her less of a woman, which is the point of this thread. And instead of using the word creepy you could have just said that you prefer women with more meat on them.

linkx7 is entitled to their opinion and views, just as you are. I don't understand why you care what his taste in women are and why you are getting so worked up about it. "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter, don't mind."

 

It's good however to hear that you are so close to your friend that you are defending her so strongly. She should be proud.

Edited by Daydreamer09

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linkx7 is entitled to their opinion and views, just as you are. I don't understand why you care what his taste in women are and why you are getting so worked up about it. "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter, don't mind."

 

It's good however to hear that you are so close to your friend that you are defending her so strongly. She should be proud.

I dunno, just sounded a tad offensive for me :/ Thanks. We've been friends since elementary school- almost ten years.

 

BTW: Very interesting comparisons between the ideal body images of yesteryear and of today-

 

http://workthatmatters.blogspot.com/2012/0...for-todays.html

 

They've taken classic art and photoshopped the body to fit today's standards.

Edited by ylangylang

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As a heterosexual woman I find myself more aesthetically attracted to men who take care of themselves. By take care of, I mean they have nice hygienic habits and they work out just enough to stay in shape. But all of the body sculpting in the world could not make me stay with a guy who was a jerk.

 

So I can see beauty in plus size women and thin women alike. It's not the looks I'm after, but more of, hey, if you're willing to put forth an hour or two of your day to shower, do your hair and makeup, it shows that you're willing to try. But if your clothes, hair, and makeup are what make you who you are, then no, I don't see beauty in that. I see beauty in people who show their personalities and use makeup and clothes to highlight the things they like about themselves.

 

Basically, if you take care of yourself and take pride in your identity and what you do, then you are beautiful in my eyes. Beauty is on the inside, but you have to let it shine through.

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I myself am naturally on the thinnish side - but I mostly consider it to be the permission to eat whatever I want and whenever I want. rolleyes.gif On the overall, I tend to think either extreme is not good - if not for other reasons, then for the extremes being unhealthy. If I can tell how many pairs of ribs you have from five meters away, you're too thin, if your middle is wider than your shoulders, you should lose some of it.

Will it decrease my opinion of you as a person when you fit either category? No.

 

...if you're willing to put forth an hour or two of your day to shower, do your hair and makeup, it shows that you're willing to try. But if your clothes, hair, and makeup are what make you who you are, then no, I don't see beauty in that. I see beauty in people who show their personalities and use makeup and clothes to highlight the things they like about themselves.

...I sure like to be clean, but is the makeup really needed? Or fancy clothes? Or haircut? I think the last I wore any makeup was around 16-17 years ago, the last I wore a dress was around 10-11 years ago, and my hair has had the same very basic cut (I practically only trim off the broken ends of my otherwise fully outgrown a bit past hipline hair) for maybe 14 years.

 

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It's not the looks I'm after, but more of, hey, if you're willing to put forth an hour or two of your day to shower, do your hair and makeup, it shows that you're willing to try.

Willing to try...what?

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Hygene expectations I can see. Everyone should be pretty clean most of the time. Shower, with soap, hair washing, etc. Proper toilet habits, etc.

 

Men, do us women a favor. Wipe. Your fronts. "Tapping" doesn't do it, hon, you still have dried uh, "stuff" there. You would not expect US to just "shake" and be done, would you? I think not. Hygene is good for all.

 

Women understand about pimples and blemishes. They happen. If you are clean and neat, usually, facial imperfections don't bug us as much as you think they do. If it is an acne problem, you may want to invest in a dermatologist, as that is a medical condition. But a few pimples or blemishes are usually not as much of a turn oiff, if the rest of you meets the standards.

 

Use deodorant. Despite all the "cool" commercials that say different (you know the one I'm talking about) many women do NOT like a huge overpowering perfumed smell on a guy. I realize it is a matter of choice and everyone is different, but, you might want to go with a less powerful deodorant on a first date, get to know HER, and let her get to know YOU, not your 'odor". Just a suggestion.

 

Wash your clothes once a week, pls. Again, women are attracted to a nice clean natural smell. We DO notice those things.

 

I saw all this, because Men expect women to do all this, but many men don't realize they are guilty of the opposite. Hygene goes both ways.

 

Just my imput on that particular subject.

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Wash your clothes once a week, pls. Again, women are attracted to a nice clean natural smell. We DO notice those things.

So not 'wear fresh clothes daily,' simply once a week?

 

And you are making it sound like women *never* do any of the above.

Edited by Kestra15

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BTW: Very interesting comparisons between the ideal body images of yesteryear and of today-

 

http://workthatmatters.blogspot.com/2012/0...for-todays.html

 

They've taken classic art and photoshopped the body to fit today's standards.

That's a very good site!

 

I think it's so interesting how our ideals of female beauty are much different today. I think that it really reinforces how women of all sizes can be beautiful. And I like how the artist didn't photoshop them as starved, stick-thin models, too.

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