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Zompocalyse OoC

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Done! :3

@Chasilin: Yours is a little hard to spot >~<" Since it'a a mix of both past and present. I think some sentences need to change.

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QUOTE (sharlykng @ Feb 7 2012, 10:38 PM

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@Chasilin: Yours is a little hard to spot >~<" Since it'a a mix of both past and present. I think some sentences need to change.

 

 

-edited- ((I know, I'm sorry. I've roleplayed in that way for more than 7 years I've never tried 1st person present before. I'll definitely try my hardest to adjust quickly. Please be patient with me >.<''))

 

Miyuus (it's written with two-syllables but spoken as one)

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Hellfire

Favourite food: The hearts of male Hellfire Wyverns

Paragraph: A warm brazen wind races through the air and dances in fickle patterns lifting leaves and carrying scents as it goes along through an open field, passing over a seemingly dead body of a female Hellfire Wyvern, it makes the mistake of picking up the repulsive fumes of rotting flesh that emit from it. In annoyance I lift my head and snort distastefully at the sweet scented meadow where I lie. I simply can't stand that fresh flower fragrance, it reminds me of the good days, the days filled with life. They still are if you're looking through the eyes of another dragon but to mine, which are glazed and dull, everything is just salt on the many, many...many wounds that cover this pitiful shadow of my former self. Ah, I can still remember my prime, not too long ago it seems, I was harassing the males of my cave with my good friends. We females had it good, we had the life. Now I have the death. Further irritating myself wasn't going to help much of anything so, with a sickly heave, I thrust myself to my heavy feet and trudge off to find something to eat. Surely there must be some injured or dieing creature around here.

 

Not nearly 15 minutes had passed after setting out when I spot a male Hellfire Wyvern and to make it better, on top of the fact that he was wounded, I knew this one. Hah! Well I be damned! -which I probably am- With no sense of stealth I make my way towards the limping and battered wyvern with a fury in my eyes that screams 'bloodthirsty rampage'. It isn't long before I am on him clinging with my rotted claws like vices gripping for dear...for dear...death? In any case, I was going to eat him. I am going to eat him! A gurgle and choking noise sounds from my throat as my thoughts attempt to convert into words but my tongue is moist and swollen and my jaw feels like it's unhinged, I'm not surprised if it is...-"Miyuus...eat heart...you!" Is all I can manage but it is enough. Beneath me the flailing dragon is stricken with fear and a hint of recognition, he cries out once more and then my teeth sinks into his jugular and a claw, one of mine, breaks off in his chest. Satisfied to watch the blood drown him I begin my work at tugging away his skin to get to his heart. When I finally do I wasted no time plunging my torn muzzle through the gaping hole in his chest and straight into that vulnerable, succulent muscle..."Heart...you...goooood" I moaned, finally in a good mood. When I was done, I supposed I should return to the cave and so begin to head on my merry way there leaving with a bloodstained frightening smile that curled my lips awkwardly and a limp on my right fore leg due to a missing toe which is probably still embedded in the wyverns chest. Someone will find his body eventually..."hahhrrggghhhaagh" comes my pathetic attempt at a jubilant, and somehow ironic, laugh. Today is a good day..-

 

 

((Thanks for taking the time to do this))

Edited by Chasilin

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<!--QuoteBegin-sharlykng+Feb 7 2012, 10:38 PM

Report Post--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (sharlykng @ Feb 7 2012, 10:38 PM

Report Post)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> @Chasilin: Yours is a little hard to spot >~<" Since it'a a mix of both past and present. I think some sentences need to change.

 

 

-edited- ((I know, I'm sorry. I've roleplayed in that way for more than 7 years I've never tried 1st person present before. I'll definitely try my hardest to adjust quickly. Please be patient with me >.<''))

 

Miyuus (it's written with two-syllables but spoken as one)

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Hellfire

Favourite food: The hearts of male Hellfire Wyverns

Paragraph: A warm brazen wind races through the air and dances in fickle patterns lifting leaves and carrying scents as it goes along through an open field, passing over a seemingly dead body of a female Hellfire Wyvern, it makes the mistake of picking up the repulsive fumes of rotting flesh that emit from it. In annoyance I lift my head and snort distastefully at the sweet scented meadow where I lie. I simply can't stand that fresh flower fragrance, it reminds me of the good days, the days filled with life. They still are if you're looking through the eyes of another dragon but to mine, which are glazed and dull, everything is just salt on the many, many...many wounds that cover this pitiful shadow of my former self. Ah, I can still remember my prime, not too long ago it seems, I was harassing the males of my cave with my good friends. We females had it good, we had the life. Now I have the death. Further irritating myself wasn't going to help much of anything so, with a sickly heave, I thrust myself to my heavy feet and trudge off to find something to eat. Surely there must be some injured or dieing creature around here.

 

Not nearly 15 minutes had passed after setting out when I spot a male Hellfire Wyvern and to make it better, on top of the fact that he was wounded, I knew this one. Hah! Well I be damned! -which I probably am- With no sense of stealth I make my way towards the limping and battered wyvern with a fury in my eyes that screams 'bloodthirsty rampage'. It isn't long before I am on him clinging with my rotted claws like vices gripping for dear...for dear...death? In any case, I was going to eat him. I am going to eat him! A gurgle and choking noise sounds from my throat as my thoughts attempt to convert into words but my tongue is moist and swollen and my jaw feels like it's unhinged, I'm not surprised if it is...-"Miyuus...eat heart...you!" Is all I can manage but it is enough. Beneath me the flailing dragon is stricken with fear and a hint of recognition, he cries out once more and then my teeth sinks into his jugular and a claw, one of mine, breaks off in his chest. Satisfied to watch the blood drown him I begin my work at tugging away his skin to get to his heart. When I finally do I wasted no time plunging my torn muzzle through the gaping hole in his chest and straight into that vulnerable, succulent muscle..."Heart...you...goooood" I moaned, finally in a good mood. When I was done, I supposed I should return to the cave and so begin to head on my merry way there leaving with a bloodstained frightening smile that curled my lips awkwardly and a limp on my right fore leg due to a missing toe which is probably still embedded in the wyverns chest. Someone will find his body eventually..."hahhrrggghhhaagh" comes my pathetic attempt at a jubilant, and somehow ironic, laugh. Today is a good day..-

 

 

((Thanks for taking the time to do this))

Approved! And yeah, nobody creates a 1st person RP since 3rd person is the easiest to write (for me as well). Though technically I made this for myself xd.png I wanted to improve my own writing, and then thought 'might as well help others also.' And so here it is ^~^

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Approved! And yeah, nobody creates a 1st person RP since 3rd person is the easiest to write (for me as well). Though technically I made this for myself xd.png I wanted to improve my own writing, and then thought 'might as well help others also.' And so here it is ^~^

hahaha well that makes a lot of sense actually! Humsies it's about 4:07 am here in France so I need to go pass out on my floor by the heater about now xd.pngD bonne nuit, thanks again for everything -the editing and the approval and your admirable patience and etc and so forth ;P-

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Good night! :3

 

 

:'D Someone drew Rae! She is so gorgeous in her undead glory! *shifty eyes* No going close to her xd.png

 

user posted image

Edited by sharlykng

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Emb(Eh-Mmb

Gender: <Male>

Stage: <almost Matured hatchling>

Previous <Ember>

Favourite food: <Cow meat, the zombies that die of hunger>

Paragraph:

I see lava inside my egg. It is really bright. I fall asleep. As I wake up, I see that my eggshell has already been broken. I squint at my parents, who saw me. "hey... That's not an Ember dragon!" were the last words I Ever would hear from my parents. And they were. The clan in the Cave had left me out to die. I look around."Mom...Dad?" I said looking around trying to find them. I see the cave, as I(sorry about that) go near it, a dragon sweeps me away." but.. I...belong!" I say.

 

 

"no you do not." a voice growls. I cry, slowly tumbling. I'm no different then everyone else! I think. I see a puddle. I am.... I think and I hide in a bush. A adult like me sees me throughthe bushes."come...young...same.." he says.I seem to understand him and follow."zombie...belong..here..." He says pointing at a cave full of mold. "here...? I say not getting it. Some rather young hatchlings stumble toward me."hi..new...fend!" they say.I cannot believe it! They look like me! I smile and play with them. They tell me how to kill animals. I a cow. It is really old. The pack of cows didn't let the old cow near them. The old cow was slowing down, ready to die. As it ambles away from te others,it lies down on the grass. As soon as its eyelids are shut, me and some othe hatchlings drag it to the Cave with lots of effort. Several tumble down the hill, and some lay down to rest. It was the best thing I ever had when we inally made it..

Lol don't read the paragraph if you don't want to. I made it longer than Mist's.(modified)

 

Modified! smile.gif

 

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Emb(Eh-Mmb

Gender: <Male>

Stage: <almost Matured hatchling>

Previous <Ember>

Favourite food: <Cow meat, the zombies that die of hunger>

Paragraph:

I see lava inside my egg. It is really bright. I fall asleep. As I wake up, I see that my eggshell has already been broken. I squint at my parents, who saw me. "hey... That's not an Ember dragon!" were the last words I Ever would hear from my parents. And they were. The clan in the Cave had left me out to die. I look around."Mom...Dad?" I said looking around trying to find them. I see the cave, as I(sorry about that) go near it, a dragon sweeps me away." but.. I...belong!" I say.

 

 

"no you do not." a voice growls. I cry, slowly tumbling. I'm no different then everyone else! I think. I see a puddle. I am.... I think and I hide in a bush. A adult like me sees me throughthe bushes."come...young...same.." he says.I seem to understand him and follow."zombie...belong..here..." He says pointing at a cave full of mold. "here...? I say not getting it. Some rather young hatchlings stumble toward me."hi..new...fend!" they say.I cannot believe it! They look like me! I smile and play with them. They tell me how to kill animals. I a cow. It is really old. The pack of cows didn't let the old cow near them. The old cow was slowing down, ready to die. As it ambles away from te others,it lies down on the grass. As soon as its eyelids are shut, me and some othe hatchlings drag it to the Cave with lots of effort. Several tumble down the hill, and some lay down to rest. It was the best thing I ever had when we inally made it..

Lol don't read the paragraph if you don't want to. I made it longer than Mist's.(modified)

 

Modified! smile.gif

Approved!

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I'm new to forums.. this'd be my first rp, so.. i post my form here, right? .3.'

Styx

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Harvest dragon

Favourite food: any meat. from other dragons to livestock.

Paragraph:

I wake up. My body is aching, and I sit up, groaning. The last thing I remember was is my 'owner' pulling out a sword. "What.. happen?.." I manage to ask, looking at the group of other harvests i use to live with. They briefly glance at me before running away. "wait.." I try to chase after them, but fail, falling to the ground, my body seemingly losing all its weight just about then. So, I just sit... hoping for answers, and unaware of my own 'death'. "they come.." I moan, "back. friends..". I continue waiting, but my body begins to stiffen, and i suddenly have a taste for meat.. That's when I notice my owner's chicken cross my path, i approach it carefully, and manage to kill and eat it.. I then went on to continue hunting, realizing my sad, and lonely fate.

 

(edited as told.)

Edited by leogirl11

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I'm new to forums.. this'd be my first rp, so.. i post my form here, right? .3.'

Styx

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Harvest dragon

Favourite food: any meat. from other dragons to livestock.

Paragraph:

I wake up. My body is aching, and I sit up, groaning. The last thing I remember was my 'owner' pulling out a sword. "What.. happen?.." I manage((present tense please!)) to ask, looking at the group of other harvests i ((use to live)) with. They all ((ran away)), after glancing at me. "wait.." I try to chase after them, but fail, falling to the ground, my body seemingly had lost all it's weight just about. So, I just sit... hoping for answers, and unaware of my own 'death'. "they come.." I moan, "back. friends..". I continue waiting, but my body begins to stiffen, and i suddenly have a taste for meat.. Thats when I notice((no d) my owner's chicken cross my path, i approach(no Ed) it careful, and manage(>_>) to kill and eat it.. I then went on to continue hunting, realizing my sad, and lonely fate.

 

(I'm not very great at writing stuff like this.. ^^; is this OK?)

Ok leogirl, just Change the stuff I did happy.gif they have a ( next to them.

And i Changed it to be right so just copy it.

Edited by girlfairy76

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Hie! :3 Girlfairy did quite well, but there are still a few mistakes. Note them in either red or blue.

 

I'm new to forums.. this'd be my first rp, so.. i post my form here, right? .3.'

Styx

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Harvest dragon

Favourite food: any meat. from other dragons to livestock.

Paragraph:

I wake up. My body is aching, and I sit up, groaning. The last thing I remember was [is] my 'owner' pulling out a sword. "What.. happen?.." I manage to ask, looking at the group of other harvests i use to live with. They all ran away, after glancing at me. [They briefly glance at me before running away.] "wait.." I try to chase after them, but fail, falling to the ground, my body seemingly had lost [losing] all its weight just about. So, I just sit... hoping for answers, and unaware of my own 'death'. "they come.." I moan, "back. friends..". I continue waiting, but my body begins to stiffen, and i suddenly have a taste for meat.. That's when I notice my owner's chicken cross my path, i approach it careful[ly], and manage to kill and eat it.. I then went on to continue hunting, realizing my sad, and lonely fate.

 

(edited as told.)

 

 

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Just a little more ;3

 

I'm new to forums.. this'd be my first rp, so.. i post my form here, right? .3.'

Styx

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Harvest dragon

Favourite food: any meat. from other dragons to livestock.

Paragraph:

I wake up. My body is aching, and I sit up, groaning. The last thing I remember was is my 'owner' pulling out a sword. "What.. happen?.." I manage to ask, looking at the group of other harvests i use to live with. They briefly glance at me before running away. "wait.." I try to chase after them, but fail, falling to the ground, my body seemingly losing all its weight just about [then]. So, I just sit... hoping for answers, and unaware of my own 'death'. "they come.." I moan, "back. friends..". I continue waiting, but my body begins to stiffen, and i suddenly have a taste for meat.. That's when I notice my owner's chicken cross my path, i approach it carefully, and manage to kill and eat it.. I then went on to continue hunting, realizing my sad, and lonely fate.

 

(edited as told.)

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I'm new to forums.. this'd be my first rp, so.. i post my form here, right? .3.'

Styx

Gender: female

Stage: adult

Previous breed: Harvest dragon

Favourite food: any meat. from other dragons to livestock.

Paragraph:

I wake up. My body is aching, and I sit up, groaning. The last thing I remember was is my 'owner' pulling out a sword. "What.. happen?.." I manage to ask, looking at the group of other harvests i use to live with. They briefly glance at me before running away. "wait.." I try to chase after them, but fail, falling to the ground, my body seemingly losing all its weight just about then. So, I just sit... hoping for answers, and unaware of my own 'death'. "they come.." I moan, "back. friends..". I continue waiting, but my body begins to stiffen, and i suddenly have a taste for meat.. That's when I notice my owner's chicken cross my path, i approach it carefully, and manage to kill and eat it.. I then went on to continue hunting, realizing my sad, and lonely fate.

 

(edited as told.)

Approved :3

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*shrug* Sometimes it's like that. Aren't you going to post? tongue.gif

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Would it be okay if I started with a regular hatchling, but in the first of second post she became a zombie?

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Swift

Gender: Female

Stage: Matured Hatchling

Previous breed: Swallowtail

Favourite food: Other hatchlings

Paragraph: I lie quietly in some thick grass, not very far from the main cave, flicking my tails. All is peaceful and quiet, and the sky is clear and blue, perfect for flying if I feel like it later. Right now I just want to rest, after hours of playing. Suddenly, however, there is an uproar. A terrible stench fills the air, a scent of death and decay. I see some of them running around, gathering up hatchlings and killing adults. They are zombies, undead dragons that the elders and mothers in the cave tell the hatchling about. I run furiously away, towards the safety of the cave, but I'm too far away and a large zombie hatchling, almost an adult, gets in my way and bares its fangs. I turn around and run in the other direction as fast as I can, but more zombies block me, and soon I'm trapped, along with some other unfortunate hatchlings. The zombies force us to march in the direction of their own cave, and a zombie bites me on my tails, hard, for walking too slow, and I cry out in pain. Suddenly I have an idea, a way for me to escape, but I can't save the other hatchlings. I slowly move my wings, and suddenly lift off from the ground, and the zombies below me react slowly, except for one young hatchling that bites me on my already sore tails before letting go. I fly high over the heads of the flightless zombies, away from them. I fly until my tiny wings tire, and land in a tree. Already, however, I feel different somehow, especially on my tails. I don't know what it is, but I feel very tired after my flight to freedom, and I decide to head back to the cave after a short nap. I don't realize it, but my flight away from the zombies had been my last, and when I awake I will never be the same again...

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Swift

Gender: Female

Stage: Matured Hatchling

Previous breed: Swallowtail

Favourite food: Other hatchlings

Paragraph: I lie quietly in some thick grass, not very far from the main cave, flicking my tails. All is peaceful and quiet, and the sky is clear and blue, perfect for flying if I feel like it later. Right now I just want to rest, after hours of playing. Suddenly, however, there is an uproar. A terrible stench fills the air, a scent of death and decay. I see some of them running around, gathering up hatchlings and killing adults. They are zombies, undead dragons that the elders and mothers in the cave tell the hatchling about. I run furiously away, towards the safety of the cave, but I'm too far away and a large zombie hatchling, almost an adult, gets in my way and bares its fangs. I turn around and run in the other direction as fast as I can, but more zombies block me, and soon I'm trapped, along with some other unfortunate hatchlings. The zombies force us to march in the direction of their own cave, and a zombie bites me on my tails, hard, for walking too slow, and I cry out in pain. Suddenly I have an idea, a way for me to escape, but I can't save the other hatchlings. I slowly move my wings, and suddenly lift off from the ground, and the zombies below me react slowly, except for one young hatchling that bites me on my already sore tails before letting go. I fly high over the heads of the flightless zombies, away from them. I fly until my tiny wings tire, and land in a tree. Already, however, I feel different somehow, especially on my tails. I don't know what it is, but I feel very tired after my flight to freedom, and I decide to head back to the cave after a short nap. I don't realize it, but my flight away from the zombies had been my last, and when I awake I will never be the same again...

Approved!

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*bump* Come on peeps! Let's make this popular! biggrin.gif

 

 

Edited by PeachSapling

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