Corrupt-A-Wish

[arula]

There is a distant rumbling overhead. You peer upwards. Several truckloads of produce are plummeting directly towards your head. Mostly melons, but you think you can also make out some vegetables of various kinds. You have time to open your mouth and say "What th--" before you are squashed by a squash.

 

Edit: Too slow! New wish granted:

 

You have a beautiful chunk of clay. It's so pliable and pleasant to play with. You can't resist molding it into one thing, then another, then another. You will never stop playing with this clay! After several weeks you starve to death.

 

I wish to ride a dolphin.

Edited September 1, 2011 by arula

[Shalarean]

Granted, but it turns out you were dreaming and the dolphin became a shark and it all became a very bad remake of Jaws.

 

I wish for fish.

[Catlover3288]

Granted, but it's a pirahanna and it bit off your finger when you tried to touch it.

 

 

I wish for nicer looking feet.

[Dragonwing1234]

Granted, but then your parents accidentally cooked them for dinner.

'd

------------

Granted, but now you hands look uglier.

 

I wish I was alive again.

Edited September 1, 2011 by Dragonwing1234

[Shalarean]

Granted, but you had to be tortured.

 

I wish I had a new book.

[pbdog]

Granted, but your dog ate it.

 

I wish for a wolf that won't kill me or hurt me.

Edited September 11, 2011 by firegirl

[Shalarean]

Granted. The wolf goes after everyone who matters to you and destroys all your stuff. But since it's not *physically* hurting you...

 

I wish for my cat not to be evil.

[pbdog]

Granted, but it becomes so nice that it makes you sick.

 

I wish I was a dragon.

[jerusha]

Granted - you have now never existed except in people's imaginations.

 

I wish I were the Empress of Fantasia!

[Dragonwing1234]

Granted, but you died.

 

I wish I wasn't tortured while being alive.

[Catlover3288]

Granted, but you were dissected while still living.

 

I wish for a bunny.

[sailing101]

Granted, but its monty python's killer rabbit.

 

I wish for world peace.

[RainSpirit]

Granted, but it's so peaceful that it's boring so everyone commits suicide.

 

I wish for there to be no HW

[Shalarean]

Granted, now all HW (HomeWork?) is consider school assignments.

 

I wish it wasn't quite so hot.

[Cavedragon49990]

Granted, but you died from frostbite.

I wish for a Mac graphics card that can run The Sims 2 and The Sims 3 without a ten piece limit on custom content.

 

~Cavey

[sailing101]

Granted, but you had to sell your mac to get it.

 

I wish for a ninja that is loyal only to me.

Edited September 2, 2011 by sailing101

[Shalarean]

Granted, but you died from frostbite.

I wish for a Mac graphics card that can run The Sims 2 and The Sims 3 without a ten piece limit on custom content.

 

~Cavey

I LOVE the Sims! All of them!

 

 

Eh-hem...back on topic then...

 

 

Granted, but the ninja only appears in your dreams.

 

I wish for a Marauders version of Harry Potter.

[Catlover3288]

Granted, but you never see/read it because it got bad reviews.

 

I wish for lots of sleep.

[jerusha]

Granted. Enjoy your coma.

 

I wish for ALL THE THINGS!

[Catlover3288]

Granted, but the meme for that phrase comes out and flicks you in the forehead, thus undoing all those wishes.

 

I wish to sleep in on Saturday.

[OrbiterSpore]

Granted. You sleep in.

...In a MASHY SPIKE PLATE! /portal2ref

 

I wish i could figure out what some of my incomprehensible wishes really do mean. /paradox

[Cavedragon49990]

Granted. But you never ever stop thinking about it.

I wish for an AWESOME Mac that can run anything in the world and I don't need Boot Camp to run Windows programs.

 

~Cavey

Edited September 9, 2011 by Cavedragon49990

[jerusha]

Granted. One giant, double-the-cheese, easy-on-the-mustard Big Mac overlord who has made the entire planet subject to its terrifying dictatorship. But, on the upside, no more boot camps.

 

I wish Netflix had all the new releases on Instant View.

Edited September 9, 2011 by jerusha

[OrbiterSpore]

Granted, but because of that world suddenly is run by some kind of sentient cloud or animal king that does not listen to reason. But now Netflix has a crappy, low-end, 8-bit signal from all releases from Instant View.

[jerusha]

D'oh!

 

I wish OrbiterSpore had made a wish.