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TJ09

Grammar Patrol

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9 hours ago, Adrak said:

 

I would argue that just because a word is more archaic, it doesn't exactly mean its wrong just because its become uncommon. Its not necessarily bad grammar, its just an older way of talking/spelling.

 

Couldn't agree more. And I do NOT like the idea of their having sprightly calls; I wouldn't be lured by something vivacious. Too tiring.

 

ANYWAY:

Adjective[edit]

spritely (comparative spritelier, superlative spriteliest)

  1. Of or relating to a sprite.
  2. Alternative spelling of sprightly.

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/spritely

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Magnesium amphiphtere has 'breath' instead of 'breathe' in its description

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There appears to be a typo in the description of the Spotted Teal drake. Surely "high-pitcher" is meant to be "high-pitched".

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For the Sabertooth Bull Drakes, please change "Aww... It’s a cute baby dragon" to "Aww... It’s a cute baby drake."

 

These guys were made before the drake descriptions were updated, and I would like them to be corrected, please.

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Posted (edited)

all from the encyclopedia! i think the subtle variation from entry to entry adds to the immersion & really makes everything feel like organic field notes, but some things go a little beyond a lack of unnecessary nouns and stray more into ‘clunky’ territory which can be jarring ^^’ no shade for these, i just saw this thread and figured i could spend some time compiling things while finally sitting down to read the full encyclopedia!

edit: adding the corrections! sorry if i shouldnt, just wanted to make sure i could get across properly what sounded funky to me ^v^

 

general grammar / consistency

  1. avea pygmy - Avea Pygmy have small scales that grow tightly against the hide.  [ avea pygmies, their hide]
  2. avea pygmy - Avea Pygmy’s have dark black eyes that have multi colored specks.  [ avea pygmies, multicolored ]
  3. avea pygmy - Female Avea Pygmies are dominate and the largest female rules the group. [ dominant ]
  4. vampire dragon - Emanciated chest and stomach area. [probably meant to be emaciated? emanciated is still a word so i wanted to clarify xD]

 

syntax / flow

  1. aeria gloris dragon Outer layer extremely smooth and almost velvety-feeling, highly sensitive, and outer layer is shed in one piece regularly. [ suggestion(s) - extremely smooth, highly sensitive and almost velvety-feeling outer layer which is shed in one piece regularly / outer layer extremely smooth, almost velvety-feeling, highly sensitive and shed in one piece regularly ]
  2. aeria gloris dragon - Blue glow from eyes and markings on side and wings is bioelectrical in nature.  [ suggestion - blue glow from eyes, dorsal markings and wings is bioelectrical in nature. ]
  3. avea pygmyAvea Pygmies diet is heavily based on dark green leafy plants. [ suggestion(s) - an avea pygmy’s diet is heavily based on / their diet is heavily based on / avea pygmies have a diet heavily based on ]
  4. balloon dragon - Balloon dragons are red with a cream colored belly. Individual color variations vary, slightly. [ suggestion(s) - individual colors may vary slightly / individuals may have slight color variations ]
Edited by thamnophis

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Posted (edited)

image.png.f7660c9728fd5172c0ebb5554970c948.png
Cantormaris mature hatchling description is missing a line break / paragraph. It displays as such:

Aww... It's a cute baby dragon. Its soft chirps capture your attention.And look! It's grown larger and its horns have developed vibrant markings. It must be close to maturing!

 

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

 

Another missing space, in https://dragcave.net/userdesc. There probably should be a space between "1" and "Frozen".

image.png.3ae31483d75622b3d12a58da931b7067.png

Edited by 0x08
Didn't realize the first image was huge

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Seen on mobile when trying to report a trade. Random apostrophe between "trade" and "creator" (presumably meant to be a slash?).Screenshot_20210826-221339.png.3804ee5a0b9514fd5093c500b5974793.png

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Posted (edited)

Encyclopedia entry for Blusang Lindwyrm:

  • Lindwurms that lack hind legs.
    • Lindwyrms that lack hind legs.
  • Vocal and talk to other hatchlings with a variety of chirps and sqeaks.

    • Vocal, talk to other hatchlings with a variety of chirps and squeaks.

  • Sometimes graze on seawood.

    • Sometimes graze on seaweed. [?]

Edited by 0x08

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Iratus Cantormaris Dragons are a chaotic, malevolant breed of coastal-dwellers. -Bold should be spelled malevolent.

 

While this can be achieved though conventional means like aggression, (from the description of the Amarignis dragon) -Bold should be through.

 

They try, with little sucess, (taken from the description of the Aquilo Xenowyrm) -Bold should be spelled success.

Edited by LadyLoki
ETA

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I was looking at my dragons and the list of artist names at the bottom unwittingly highlighted an error:

Quote

[...] Dolphinsong, Dovealove, dracchan, Dracchan, Fiona BlueFire, Fiona Bluefire, Glass_Walker, Hawaiianbabidoll, [...]

There are at least two names that appear twice because they are capitalized differently. 😮

 

[ETA] I did some cross-checking and found the "culprit" breeds.

  • Ember Dragon (dracchan, correct capitalization based on scroll and forum name)
  • Fever Wyvern (Dracchan)
  • Copper Dragon (Fiona BlueFire, correct capitalization based on other breeds she worked on)
  • Kovos Pygmy (Fiona Bluefire)
Edited by 0x08

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Green Dragon Encyclopedia entry, Hatchling Behavior:

  • Hatchlings compete to see who can launch their rock piles the furtherst.

Should be furthest.

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The adult descriptions for Sabertooth Bull Drakes and Mirisia Amphipteres contain byte order marks.

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Aquilo Xenowyrm adult description:

Quote

They try, with little sucess, to get the more foul-tempered Astrapi to join in their games.

success

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