Grammar Patrol

[relaks]

1 hour ago, osmarks said:

We are, however, not using Latin, we are using English, so English pluralization (stick an S on and hope it sounds okay) should be used.

Some words in English are actually latin and therefor use latin plural. Cactus --> cacti. Larva --> larvae. Impromptu is correct in English and is still a latin word. 

[Cinspawn]

On the page of a gendered (male) Omen Wyrm hatchling:

 

Oh look, it’s a cute baby... dragon? It’s impossible to see much of its body through all the flames.And look! It’s finally grown some sort of bizarre hide. It must be close to maturing.

 

Really small thing, but there's a space missing between the two sentences.

Edited November 12, 2018 by Cinspawn

[Lagie]

I was browsing my badges and noticed this by my Easter basket - 

Earned by particpating in a Festival of Eggs event

[Dirtytabs]

On 11/4/2018 at 10:17 PM, HeatherMarie said:

Oh yes, the Arcana's description is overrun with commas. I'm not all that great with figuring out where they should and shouldn't go, but this sentence especially is awkward:

 

However, they are also very intelligent dragons, and when raised around mages, or others of their own kind, almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic. 

I wouldn't mind a lot of commas, but these make the sentence grammatically incorrect.

 

Take out the one after "dragons" because what follows is not a complete sentence *, and you'll have a correct sentence.

Quote

However, they are also very intelligent dragons and when raised around mages, or others of their own kind, almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic.

It's not incorrect to encase "or others of their own kind" in commas if you consider the phrase a parenthetical element. Without it, it goes: However, they are also very intelligent dragons and when raised around mages almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic.

 

How about

Quote

However, they are also very intelligent dragons, and when raised around mages, or others of their own kind, they almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic.

I like this one. Just a simple "they".

 

Or

Quote

However, they are also very intelligent dragons, and when raised around mages or others of their own kind, they almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic.

 

 

Or if you want to get rid of as many commas as possible

Quote

However, they are also very intelligent dragons and when raised around mages or others of their own kind almost invariably become obsessed with the study of magic.

 

 

All correct. IMO, the one that keeps the commas and just adds "they" reads the best.

 

* I think that's called a "compound predicate", and this kind of error is in more than one place on the site. See bleeding moon egg description

[Moonwick]

I don't know if this counts as grammar or spelling error but I randomly discovered that the encyclopedia page for the Ochredrake describes them as dragons on one of the lines. I don't know if this is supposed to be this way or not, but thought I'd point it out?

Quote

Adult Behavior

• Swift and cheerful dragon.

https://dragcave.net/dragonopedia/73

[Din85]

Well I'm no native Speaker, but on this description there seems to be one missing word

 

Because of their four wings, Nhiostrifes are very nimble in the air and have control their movements with ease.

[StormWizard212]

14 hours ago, Din85 said:

Well I'm no native Speaker, but on this description there seems to be one missing word

 

Because of their four wings, Nhiostrifes are very nimble in the air and have control their movements with ease.

 

It sounds like it's meant to read: "Because of their four wings, Nhiostrifes are very nimble in the air and can control their movements with ease."

Edited December 5, 2018 by StormWizard212

[camelia2]

On dark green dragons there is a point that mentions:

• Colour/number of flowers appears dimorphic: females yellow (3), males red (2)

Yet this is totally inacurate. 1st we have no dimorphism for this species and 2nd it is actually describing an Alt vine so.... it should be changed.

 

Also, so many species info where 'then' is used wrong. You use ' than' to compare and 'then' to express past or possible time

[StormWizard212]

15 minutes ago, camelia2 said:

Also, so many species info where 'then' is used wrong. You use ' than' to compare and 'then' to express past or possible time

 

Can you give specific examples so they can be fixed?

[Dracaena]

1 hour ago, camelia2 said:

On dark green dragons there is a point that mentions:

• Colour/number of flowers appears dimorphic: females yellow (3), males red (2)

Yet this is totally inacurate. 1st we have no dimorphism for this species and 2nd it is actually describing an Alt vine so.... it should be changed.

 

Also, so many species info where 'then' is used wrong. You use ' than' to compare and 'then' to express past or possible time

I suspect the information for dark green dragons was written in the time frame of this thread where there was a planned update to add dimorphism and polish the sprites.

I had held out hope the update would eventually happen.  This many years passage makes it seem not so likely but only Lythiaren and the Bossman can say for sure.

[camelia2]

I'm not native speaker, but for me, Starsinger's pedia seems bugged with mistakes

•Are not very adept at moving quickly on all fours

I don't think you can say very adept... and it also seems contextualy wrong...I mean, adept at moving quickly? Is this a choice on how fast you move?

•they are relatively light-weight and usually...

light-weighted right?

•However, they are also surprisingly durable.

a living thing can be durable? As I know this can only be used for objects.... and what is the sense here? They're strong or?

•Can live anywhere so long as high perches are available

as long as

•branches, or both •cubes, honey, or tree sap.

Unnecesary commas

I haven't unlocked all the infos yet so there might be more

 

Edited January 14, 2019 by camelia2
Ironically, typos

[Lagie]

1 hour ago, camelia2 said:

I'm not native speaker, but for me, Starsinger's pedia seems bugged with mistakes

•Are not very adept at moving quickly on all fours

I don't think you can say very adept... and it also seems contextualy wrong...I mean, adept at moving quickly? Is this a choice on how fast you move?

•they are relatively light-weight and usually...

light-weighted right?

•However, they are also surprisingly durable.

a living thing can be durable? As I know this can only be used for objects.... and what is the sense here? They're strong or?

•Can live anywhere so long as high perches are available

as long as

•branches, or both •cubes, honey, or tree sap.

Unnecesary commas

I haven't unlocked all the infos yet so there might be more

 

adept is fine

light-weight is correct

durable does usually apply to things rather than beings!

so long as/as long as - interchangeable in this context; as is usually in written form, so in spoken

not sure about the comma issue and I don't seem to have unlocked that one!

 

[RealWilliamShakespeare]

1 hour ago, camelia2 said:

I'm not native speaker, but for me, Starsinger's pedia seems bugged with mistakes

•Are not very adept at moving quickly on all fours

I don't think you can say very adept... and it also seems contextualy wrong...I mean, adept at moving quickly? Is this a choice on how fast you move?

•they are relatively light-weight and usually...

light-weighted right?

•However, they are also surprisingly durable.

a living thing can be durable? As I know this can only be used for objects.... and what is the sense here? They're strong or?

•Can live anywhere so long as high perches are available

as long as

•branches, or both •cubes, honey, or tree sap.

Unnecesary commas

I haven't unlocked all the infos yet so there might be more

 

 

- You can definitely intensify “adept”, you can be exceptionally adept, especially adept, so you can definitely be “not very adept”

 

- Light-weight is an adjective, so the dragon can be lightweight. If anything, my issue with it is that it should be “lightweight”, one word, not hyphenated

 

- “Durable” can be used to describe a being/person, meaning “to have endurance”, although it’s a pretty informal use of the word. I don’t think anything is strictly wrong with it though.

 

- “So long as” is just as accurate as “as long as”. While I prefer the latter, it’s technically fine

 

- Those are Oxford commas - perfectly viable!

 

Edit: Oops, Ninja’d by Lagie!! 

Edited January 14, 2019 by RealWilliamShakespeare

[Whirlaway]

On the Undead Dragon Encyclopedia page there is a mistake here: Move with what is best be described as a “shamble.”

 

This should be: Move with what is best described as a “shamble.”

 

Remove the "be" from the "what is best be described" portion. With the "what is" this sounds improper (at least to me).

 

That or it can be: "What can best be described as [...]"

[Kakaru_of_DOOM]

Adulthood in Script dragons is sudden: around the same time they become able to breed, they shed their skin, revealing both the red markings that are unique to each dragon and their ability to use magic, .

There's an extra comma and space at the end of that sentence there. I didn't see anyone pointing that one out on the previous page where the other extra commas were commented on.

[HeatherMarie]

On the Geminae's encyclopedia page, under 'hatchling behavior', the first point reads:

Quote

Young or unhatched Geminae have no focal point for their psychic power and thus exert it outward with no filter. This may cause headaches or mental fuzziness nearby creatures.

 

That last line definitely isn't right, but I'm not sure if it should be *in* nearby creatures or *for* nearby creatures (or something else).

 

edit to add: A little farther down on the same page there is:

Quote

Even when young, Geminae display an uncanny intellect, sometimes capabvle of outsmarting adult dragons.

 

It should be 'capable', of course. 

Edited May 26, 2019 by HeatherMarie

[camelia2]

'Female Avea Pygmies are dominate and the largest female rules the group.'

It should be 'dominant' or 'Female Avea Pygmies dominate'

[Kila]

Dunno if this is the place for this, but Gold dragons have the incorrect art credits in the encyclopedia! They're still listed as Shikaru and Silvanon, instead of Nakase.

[wobster109]

Luminox adult description: 

“Luminox Wyverns are a spritely breed, though their sharp beaks and talons may suggest otherwise.”

 

“Spritely” is a common misspelling of “sprightly” meaning quick or nimble. But I’m not sure whether the description intends to say they are nimble or they are fairy-like, since sharp beaks and talons don’t get in the way of being quick or nimble. But they would prevent the dragon from being fairy-like.

 

If it’s saying they’re nimble, then I think “sprightly” is correct. If it’s saying they are fairy-like, then spritely can be confused for sprightly, and “sprite-like” would be more clear.

 

———

 

New Halloween dragons hatchie description is missing a space: “... studies your habits intently.And look!”

Edited October 31, 2019 by wobster109
Add typo in new Halloween hatchies

[RealWilliamShakespeare]

Hey hey, Stickler Supreme over here!

 

I can't help noticing there's a missing space in the 2019 Halloween dragon's description, between "intently", and "And":

 

"Aww... It’s a cute baby dragon. It has begun to mimic your voice, and studies your habits intently.And look! It’s grown larger and its antlers are coming in. It must be close to maturing!"
 

[Sundew]

The text after Precognition, for an egg that has not been Influenced, reads:

"[name] uses the power of time magic to create an illusion of the future, revealing that this egg will be male, though its future may still be influenced."

It mentioned that it "may still be influenced" even if the egg's time is too low and it can't be changed.

 

Not really a typo but felt like this would be the best thread to mention it in.

[camelia2]

Hellfire encyclopedia reads

• Live in packs comprimised of an alpha female, a few betas, and several omegas.

There is no such word as 'comprimised'. I supose the meaning of that was comprise, so comprised is the apropriate replacement

 

A lot of then and than confusions around, one I found

Holiday 'wrapper'

• Their calls sound more like a ‘boo’, ‘baw’, or ‘za’s then growls.
• They are more then happy to care for hatchlings of any breed.

a missed s for this breed too

• Ones raised by humans seem to undertand the basics of cooking and baking.

Edited November 9, 2019 by camelia2

[RealWilliamShakespeare]

Big ol' nitpick here already but I can't help noticing the new Desert release S2 hatchlings have a double exclamation mark in their descriptions.

 

Aww... It’s a cute baby dragon. Despite the heat of the desert, it loves to run around.
And look! It’s gotten much larger!! It must be close to maturing.

 

I guess there's nothing wrong with it but it feels a little out of place considering the rest of the descriptions on the site.

[purplehaze]

I believe there is an error in the description of the new Erador Lindwyrm. " be them romantic or otherwise" should be " be they romantic or otherwise"

[Confused Cat]

From the Mutamore (view page) description:

 

Quote

However, when winter begins to wane, these normally grouchy dragons undergo a massive personality shift and become excessively chipper and incredibly social with the solitary focus of pairing up themselves—and other—dragons.

 

I think the em dashes (?) don't make sense like this.