Things I've learned from the Movies

[Nerendier]

((Not sure if this belongs in multimedia, but w/e.))

If being chased by a monster/alien/psychopath

1. Never, ever, utter the phrase "It's going to be alright." You will die within a few seconds.

2. Never be the racial minority. You will die quickly.

3. Never go alone.

4. Never stick your head outside to "see if the monster is gone."

5. Never be the gun-toting military guy/woman, you will die first before you know there's a monster on the loose.

6. Never try to be a hero and buy the others a few minutes.

 

If there's a murderer in your group

7. It's never who everyone thinks it is.

8. It's always someone who has been introduced early.

 

If you think the bad guy is dead.

9. Cut him/it/her up into little pieces and then incinerate them, because THEY ARE NEVER DEAD OTHERWISE.

 

So, what about you guys? What have you learned from the movies?

[Anca]

Most common movie cliches:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

 

Edit. And yes, it belongs in the Multimedia.

Edited October 14, 2010 by Anca

[sithdragon]

 

 

If it's a Star Trek Movie dont wear a red shirt on away missions.

 

 

 

It's such a bonding moment in cinemas when they pull cliches and the whole audience groans.

 

 

Good times.

[honeytea]

The superhero almost NEVER dies.

[RheaZen]

If there's a murderer in your group

7. It's never who everyone thinks it is.

8. It's always someone who has been introduced early.

"Try to be the murderer, just so you don't have to worry so much."

[Starscream64]

• If I find a strange, gelatanous substance on the ground, the only way to figure out what it is is to taste it.
• Under no circumstances should you make love. You will be the next ones to die.
• If I am having a conversation indoors and the dog(s) start to bark outside, do NOT check to see why they are fussing about.
• The cups of water I leave around my apartment will eventually serve a purpose.
• Kids, in general, are weird, but if the say that they are seeing people in the house that you are not seeing, they are probably telling the truth.
• The person that you hate the most will probably end up being your soulmate. Deal with it.

[LokyCokey]

- When you're running away from the killer don't run upstairs unless you have a way out.

- Cell phones never work when you really need them.

- Always be suspect of the pretty people.

[Nectaris]

Never say "What's the worst that could happen"

or "It couldn't get any worse than this"

 

Saying either guarantees something bad will happen.

[KageSora]

Never, ever assume that it will be okay if you just narrowly avoid death. The moment you think it's okay, something horrible is going to happen to you.

 

Never carry a picture of your beloved (family).

 

 

How about things we learned from TV shows, would those count, too? If so, wood-chippers trump pretty much everything.

[TikindiDragon]

If you seem to be in the third part of a trilogy all bets are off

[Ruins]

If your husband/wife/partner/kid tries to show you something and it mysteriously vanishes between them seeing it and your arriving, don't just go 'It was never there, go back to sleep.' They wouldn't get you up in the middle of the night for nothing, you know.

 

Oh, and never trust a man with a goatee.

[LokyCokey]

-When people get out of a car you should always look at their feet first.

-Music always plays during the important parts.

[RheaZen]

Look UP!

 

(Check the ceilings).

[Dr. Paine]

If your husband/wife/partner/kid tries to show you something and it mysteriously vanishes between them seeing it and your arriving, don't just go 'It was never there, go back to sleep.' They wouldn't get you up in the middle of the night for nothing, you know.

 

Oh, and never trust a man with a goatee.

... So then what the hell are we supposed to do with Gordon Freeman!?

 

*coughs*

 

Stalking isn't a crime, it's just showing your twu wuv!

[Ruins]

Gordon Freeman? Never heard of him, but if I had I wouldn't trust him...

 

I agree with RheaZen- look up. Nobody ever looks up, or behind, and that really annoys me especially when you can see the monster but they can't...

 

When making an important phone call, keep moving on the spot- look up down, left, right and behind. Don't tantalise them with clues about what you're calling about; if you want to give the police an important clue, say I have an important clue, then just blurt 'This is the clue- so and so...'.

[RheaZen]

"Why didn'tya just SHOOT him?!"

[rubyshoes]

From Land of the Lost - Never trust some one wearing a tunic.

[Dr. Paine]

Gordon Freeman? Never heard of him, but if I had I wouldn't trust him...

 

I agree with RheaZen- look up. Nobody ever looks up, or behind, and that really annoys me especially when you can see the monster but they can't...

 

When making an important phone call, keep moving on the spot- look up down, left, right and behind. Don't tantalise them with clues about what you're calling about; if you want to give the police an important clue, say I have an important clue, then just blurt 'This is the clue- so and so...'.

:|

 

He is the One Free Man! LEARN YERSELF SOME HALF LIFE, DANGIT!

[Ruins]

I WILL, ONCE I GET A X-BOX/PLAYSTATION/WHATEVERITIS.

 

AND GET OUT FROM UNDER MY MUM'S THUMB.

[Wind-Swept-Canid]

Don't say who's there when you answer the phone in a horror movie.

 

Don't go alone into a seemingly empty, dark room.

 

Don't leave your TV on with the 'snow' pattern, lest creepy little girls come crawling out of it.

 

And don't go out into the woods at night with no batteries for your flashlight. In fact, don't go into the woods at night, period.

[RheaZen]

If it's any sort of action/adventure/horror movie, use the buddy system when going to the bathroom.

[satyr76]

When an unarmed villian is just standing there saying her/his little speech about how s/he'll rule the world, don't wait for them to finish. Just shoot them.

 

It annoys me so much when heroes wait for thee speech to finish.

[LADYDRAGONSKEEPER]

If the person who has been helping you throughout the whole movie does something, hid a secret from you, tells you something you don't want to hear or any other such maddening thing. Don't storm off mad or run them off. Something bad will happen to one of you.

[Twyro]

When an unarmed villian is just standing there saying her/his little speech about how s/he'll rule the world, don't wait for them to finish. Just shoot them.

 

It annoys me so much when heroes wait for thee speech to finish.

I hate it when a bad guy HAS to do a speech.

If in horror movie - don't go to the basement. Lesson for life.

[ChocolateIzzy]

To be on the run for 500 years, you have to be a manipulative, psychotic *