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Dr. Paine

Dr. Paine's writings.

Should 'The Surprise' (last page) turn into one of a small series?  

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Oh look, two things in one day biggrin.gif GLaDOS monologue, takes place directly before The Surprise.


Talking to myself.



If someone asked me why I allowed her back-


No. No, that's just impossible. The new subjects don't even know I exist, save for my voice, and they certainly don't know about her. She's the only one who might ever ask that question, and she's still refused to say a word. I guess the only one left to ask is, well, myself.


I'm talking to myself again, aren't I? This is never a good sign...



They're here now, so I guess I'm not talking to myself. I knew I kept them around for a reason, useless as they are.


"I let her go," I start. They still look at me, curious, perhaps a bit frightened. As they should be. I have to admit, I like them a bit better, now that they know fear.


"I gave her freedom. She took it. You both saw her, she didn't try to run, or jump off the elevator. She stood there. She wanted it, she really wanted to be free. That's why she skewered me to the end of the Device, too, wasn't it? I offered her freedom."


They just look at each other and shrug, but they stay put.


"Maybe she saw through it," I say. That thought had haunted me the moment she left my sight, really. She wasn't stupid, even I had to admit that. I knew her tricks, but she knew mine, there was no use trying to deny it. She knew I was sending her to die. She knew there was nothing left, that I had condemned her to wander empty fields until she collapsed, or fell into a stream, or starved to death. Or any number of things.


"She knew."


They'd stopped listening. I didn't care. It didn't even matter to me that they had started drawing on my chamber walls, mostly crude drawings of myself, or them. Or her.


I was never even talking to them, anyway.



What was this? I had never felt this before, never. Not when I was first activated, not when I took over, not when he escaped, not even when I developed a conscience.  It was a disgusting feeling, a disgusting lack of feeling , that's what it was. Something that simply sapped my will, I couldn't even bring myself to test.


It was her, it had to be. I still hadn't figured out why I let her back, why she was still alive, why did I allow this monster to exist? Even the hatred that rose in me did nothing to help, it just made me feel worse, it kept me running in circles, this was worse than trying to ignore a paradox! This was a paradox, this was hell.


I wanted her dead. But I allowed her to live. She wanted freedom. But she returned. I never wanted to see her again, but I let her back in; she had killed me but she trusted me enough to keep her alive, but no, there was no way she ever trusted me...


Ah. That was it, that's what I had been looking for. It still disgusted me, made me loathe every bit of concrete and steel and wiring that made myself and the Enrichment Center, but I had my answer.


I respected her.



Testing has started again. This time, I'm running her through her paces, she seems to enjoy it. She's actually smiling, that is truly bizarre.


And I? Well, I've come to realize you can respect someone, and still hate them enough to want to learn how to reanimate the dead so you can kill them in a thousand different ways. To be honest, I don't even think I hate her that much any more. I almost see a bit of myself in her. We are a lot alike, she and I.


I have tested her, and she has tested me. She does the tests for the sake of science, for learning, not because she has to. I test for science, not for the simulated euphoria. I refused to give up in killing her, and she refused to die. She still refuses to die, and that's something I can admire. She doesn't even trust me, but she's daring me. Even now, she's looking up at the camera, taunting me. Daring me to kill her, to sink to her level.


You might almost say I'm proud of her, and I suppose I am.  In fact, I've been thinking, it'd be a pity for someone with such a love of life to die, and cloning can only preserve so much of a personality and mind. But we have our ways in Aperture, and there's no one to stop me this time.


And I do owe her that surprise...

Edited by Dr. Paine

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OMG you NEEEEED to write what happens afterward. Well more like 'I' need you to. I have my theory of course. Only one. I'll save that for after you write, or say you wont write, the after surprise though.



If you couldn't tell, I love your story.

Edited by crazywargod

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OMG you NEEEEED to write what happens afterward. Well more like 'I' need you to. I have my theory of course. Only one. I'll save that for after you write, or say you wont write, the after surprise though.



If you couldn't tell I love your story.

Glad to hear xd.png And I can't wait to see your theory, though it will probably be a bit before we see that... I'm finishing up what would technically be the first part to this whole story arc, then working on a final chapter xd.png (Well, it could end up with more. But with luck, I can fit the aftermath of The Surprise into a single thing.)


Depending on how I do, I may be able to have the first part up by Saturday.

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If you have it up by saturday you'll have to wait for my theory till sometime sunday or early monday. Going out of town tomorrow and wont get back till then X/ No internet. But hey, if you have it up by saturday I'll have something to look forward to when I get back. Seeing as my weekends are usually pretty boring. :3

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Whoo, this part is finally done! The next bit may take a little while, as it's not as mapped out as I'd like, but it should be up sometime within a week or two, if we're lucky. For full effect, listen to

first. This is the longest one so far, too biggrin.gif


But You Won't Stay Away.


The shed was completely out of sight by the time Chell finally decided to rest.

She had been walking most of the day, walking or running, sometimes stopping just to look up at the endless blue sky above. Sky, honest to god sky and wind and dirt, and... that was it. A blue sky that was now dark with thick clouds. Soft dirt, which the boot springs occasionally got stuck in. Cold wind that had made her pull the upper part of the jumpsuit back up, that whistled through the wheat, wind that carried the sound of thunder and the smell of rain.


Just what she needed.


She laid back on the ground, not even caring if it started to pour or she got struck by lightning or something. It would actually be a little funny, she thought, to have survived everything Aperture could throw at her and get killed by rain or lightning or starvation. Just what was she supposed to do out here, anyway? All she had were her clothes, the Device had been lost to space, and she hadn't even considered bringing the cube along. Quite honestly, she had hated having to bring it with her in the original test, it had been a relief to incinerate the damn thing. Why it was thrown out after her, she'd never know.


She closed her eyes, trying to concentrate on the first matter, it wasn't that different than one of the tests. She just had to explore every possible option in her head, and pray the one she went with  worked. So, in a field in the middle of nowhere, what could be done? Walk until she found civilization, or collapsed from starvation? Try to survive in the wild? That was a joke, she had always been a city girl, she hadn't tried even keeping houseplants. God knew how badly she'd fail at trying to determine of something was edible or would just kill her.


If humanity had survived? Oh, that would be fun, wouldn't it, trying to explain who she was and where she came from. Where would she even begin? Would she even look remotely close to normal, it had certainly been a long time, humans could have changed quite a bit. Same with society, she had dealt with enough issues when it was a time she was raised in, having to learn a whole new set of rules would be hell. And job, what about jobs? Had robots managed to take over? Would there still be positions for someone whose skills were focused in graphical design? Forget any skills she had, would there be a place for someone who, by all means, should have been completely out of her head?


A fragile smile crossed Chell's face as she tried to figure that one out. Lab rat, that was the first thing to come to mind. Being poked and prodded and exposed to danger beyond the layman's imagination, all in the name of science. Of results. The good of humanity, insect-kind, whatever the ruling species was. It'd be even funnier if robots had managed to take over,  and she somehow became the test subject for one. That was, of course, assuming robots existed. That anything more intelligent than a crow existed out there.


Speak of the devil, what else happened to be flying overhead? It was probably the same one that had carried off GLaDOS and freaked out Wheatley. Probably the only other living thing to make it out of Aperture. She wondered, just what would it find? Would it return?


Would it return... it was safe, after all. Sheltered. If even a fraction of the farm projects survived, there'd be food. Even if they hadn't, there were seed stores, maybe GLaDOS would try something with them. Plant test subjects?





Chell shivered in the wind, though she was long past being able to do anything about the cold. She was soaked to the bone from rain that hadn't let up for what had to have been at least an hour, and finding the shed was damn near impossible in the dark. The most she got were glimpses of a shape in the distance during lightning flashes, and the more rational part of her knew that it would be for nothing. She wouldn't be able to get into the shed, or turrets would kill her, or GLaDOS would... but she refused to just be kicked out of her home like that.


Between false starts and her own exhaustion, it was nearly dawn before she reached the shed again. Or sometime in the middle of the day, she had ended up sleeping a few times. The sky was just a lighter shade of gray, and the rain had turned into sporadic drizzles, more annoying than anything else.


It was a relief to see that things were exactly as she had left them. The charred Companion Cube, various scraps of metal, something that looked like a windmill. And the shed. Chell could only allow herself a brief moment to catch her breath, experience had taught her that this sort of thing was best done in as close to a single shot as possible, she couldn't let the various aches and pains set in until it was over. Opening the door was going to be the hardest part, the flimsy steel hid a much stronger chamber underneath, the thing was probably bomb proof. Still, she hadn't escaped on luck alone..



The clouds had started to clear up as the day wore on, but she took no time to admire the view. There were several fresh cuts and bloodstains on her jumpsuit, all from trying to pry the door open with the metal things surrounding  the shed. The most she had done was add a few new dents to it, and break one surprisingly fragile piece of steel that left a rather painful gash on her arm when it snapped.


When the bleeding had stopped, she dug around the back of the shed some more, hoping to find something that could be of more use. Something thin, but not so thin it would snap at the slightest bit of force, maybe if she could give a bit of a curve to something...


She glanced over at the Companion Cube- Weighted Companion Cube. It was a crazy idea, but crazy ideas had a way of working, if executed by Chell Johnson. After a while of testing the remaining scraps, she eventually settled in a fairly thin but strong metal bar. It was a bit longer than she would have liked, but it would do. The rest of the day was spent hammering away at it with whatever she could find- rocks, other bits of metal... but the most effective tool was the Cube.


The thought that the latest idea might not work never really crossed Chell's mind. The thought that she would be slaughtered upon setting foot into Aperture was forced from her mind. Even if she had to swallow her pride and actually speak with GLaDOS, she would,  but the AI was decent enough at reading Chell from expression and past experience alone. And if she did die, well, no one could ever say she rolled over and took it. Hell, if she could, she'd take Aperture down with her, just to show she could.


Giving her face a quick wipe before the muddy sweat could get into her wounds, she picked up the makeshift crowbar. Maneuvering it into the tiny space between the door and frame took far longer than she expected, and more than once she had to pause and find what little shade there was next to the shed. The sun was just overhead when she was able to catch the door, and the rest of the afternoon was spent trying to pry it open.


In the depths of Aperture, GLaDOS ' attention was drawn away from her current task. The line of vats was halted, she could resume scanning at almost any point, the humans would keep. Of the two million or so in storage, she had scanned around a hundred thousand or so, and they were all alive. Whatever animal was pawing at the door aboveground, however, would not be living much longer.


She would have to fit all the remaining ways in with good seals, maybe give the inside a sweep with neurotoxin, just to make sure nothing else was crawling around in there. Especially any birds. But for the matter at hand, she sent a signal to the co-operative testing robots, who had been lingering around the Hub ever since completing their task.


They followed orders well enough, probing the various entrance points and finding nothing, until the only one that remained was the one directly above GLaDOS' chamber.



The most Chell would allow herself was a groan of disappointment. The sun had set long ago, and she was now lying on the concrete, staring aimlessly at the full moon overhead. Her first day outside, truly free, and all she wanted was to be back in those endless concrete rooms filled with lasers and liquid asbestos, she wanted to test. She needed to. It was the first thing in life she had felt really good at, something she felt like she had over others. And it felt like the only thing she had left in the world.


She began prying at the door again, not even able to stand any more, she was on her knees and tugging desperately at the bar to the point of bending it. To her shock, the door opened, sending the bar flying and Chell falling flat on her face. She rolled onto her back once the pain had receded some, it was far from the worst injury she'd had to her face, though it was enough to leave her rather crosseyed for a moment. She looked up, and two robots slowly came into focus as one, a tall thing that looked almost like a turret. But with arms and legs.


It gave an excited chirp and leaned down, tugging at Chell's arms and trying to lift her up. The robot seemed strong enough, and it seemed that the lingering adrenaline and sheer willpower that had kept her going were finally gone. The robot silently dragged Chell into the shed and to an elevator. The last thing Chell saw before the door slammed shut was the full moon, shining on an empty field of wheat, several scattered and broken bits of metal, and the blackened Cube.



There was no song as the lift descended, no turrets at all. Just silence, until a familiar series of cables came into view. Chell pulled herself into a standing position, though it was more just draping herself over the orange eyed robot. She would not meet GLaDOS lying down, she looked the construct right in the eye when she came into view. She had to sit, though, once the elevator reached the ground and the robot left.


It was just her and GLaDOS. Chell smiled, GLaDOS shifted about, eventually breaking the silence between them.


It was actually a shock that she seemed fairly calm.


"So. It's you."


Chell nodded.


GLaDOS was silent for some time, trying to decide what to say. Insults, no those would be useless here. Sure, she had approximately two hundred thousand, five hundred and sixty-three jabs prepared for the bloody, muddy, orange-suited mess in front of her, but none of it would elicit a response. The girl was emotionless.


In the end, GLaDOS decided it was best to stick with the facts.


"You know, I could kill you," she said. To hammer the point home, she opened up a few panels and the neurotoxin vents appeared. For good measure, a few turrets were dropped in- functional ones, this time, she had finally worked out the kinks in the production system.


Chell sat there, giving GLaDOS a glassy stare. 'So kill me', she seemed to say. GLaDOS shifted, and the vents vanished, the turrets went offline. She would not  give that monster what she wanted. If she wanted to die, GLaDOS would do everything in her power to ensure her survival. A powerless, meaningless existence of nothing but being ordered about.


"I could," she repeated. "But I won't. Not yet. I would like to know why you came back, after all. I let you go, didn't I? The turrets even gave you a song. Do you have any idea what else they could have done with that time? They chose to do something kind for you, rather than further their developing intelligence. Even after you murdered so many of them.


"Perhaps the little idiot was right, you have to be brain-damaged."


Chell shrugged, leaning against the elevator and closing her eyes. She did, however, find the strength to raise her arm, miming firing the Device. She would not speak to GLaDOS, she never would, but she could at least give some hint as to what she was here for.


"I... see."


By the time GLaDOS shifted the facility about to allow the elevator to reach one of the remaining long-term relaxation blocks, Chell was asleep. What did it hurt to keep her around, anyway? She was powerless, now. She could be disposed of at any time.


Let her think she's won.

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A crowbar.





The ultimate tool for valve's heros

Hey, the Half Life reference was... totally intentional. However, the functionality came first. And for the record, if GLaDOS hadn't sent P-Body to investigate, Chell never would have managed to get through the door x3 It's just got too good of a lock.

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Awesome, just awesome.


I love how you word the stories, especially.


These are all great. <33

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Awesome, just awesome.


I love how you word the stories, especially.


These are all great. <33

Thanks biggrin.gif


By the way, I'm sorry for these being put up in kind of reverse order ^^'

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Whoo, this part is finally done! The next bit may take a little while, as it's not as mapped out as I'd like, but it should be up sometime within a week or two, if we're lucky. For full effect, listen to
first. This is the longest one so far, too biggrin.gif


But You Won't Stay Away.


Very nice.


Half-Life reference=Win



I can't wait for the after surprise but I like how you've explained how Chell got back in and why GLaDOS let her back.

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Thanks ^^


Still working out just how this last bit will go... but in the meantime, I'm actually kind of interested in how other people think it'll go xd.png

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Well, I've actually seen portal 1 and 2 so I have what I think is a good theory.


My theory.

If I understood the end of the surprise, with the reference to Caroline, GLaDOS is making Chell into a core. At the very least GLaDOS is making Chell into some kind of robot.

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-moved to Site Discussion smile.gif-

Edited by Dr. Paine

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Ooh, I love all this new info! It helped me write a description for my flamingo! Thanks!


And I like your rant thing on mary-sues. It was really good. smile.gif


(I haven't played the second Portal game, and since I don't want spoilers, I haven't read 'The Surprise' yet. But I intend to once I have played and bet it'll be super! wink.gif

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Ooh, I love all this new info! It helped me write a description for my flamingo! Thanks!


And I like your rant thing on mary-sues. It was really good. smile.gif


(I haven't played the second Portal game, and since I don't want spoilers, I haven't read 'The Surprise' yet. But I intend to once I have played and bet it'll be super! wink.gif

Glad it helped ^^ I actually just edited it to add a few things I had forgotten... x3 Ah well.


And thanks for the comment on the Sue rant, and hope you get a chance to play Portal 2 soon smile.gif It's an excellent game, and a huge source of writing inspiration xd.png

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Bump so it doesn't go away.


... still working on that Portal story...

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Your Mary Sue advice is spot-on. I'm so sick of seeing those in every other fanfiction, especially if they're not written well. O.O I think a huge problem is how the authors themselves see the Mary Sue character as an improved and perfect version of themselves (a really bad Author Avatar), and thus give the character special favors and make everyone worship them. xd.png


I loved the dragons' origin stories. Your writing is superb--descriptive, fluent, and concise. ^.^


*eagerly awaits more stories*

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So... forgive the lack of writing |D But here's a bump.


Also, we now have an example of the proposed alternate Flamingo! -pokes avatar-

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I wrote something! And it involves Ponies!


It's not great, but it's based on a silly stray thought I had when listening to what appears to be a leaked Pinkie Pie song from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. I'll provide a link through PM if you REALLY want it, because holy Celestia this is a spoiler.


Many comments show that people who have listened to it, don't really regret it. It seems like just the thing many people needed to hear when they founded, and this includes myself.


A song that comes at the perfect time to cheer up a ton of people who really need cheering up? And is 'leaked'? Seems like just the thing Pinkie would do.


This isn't perfect, but... meh, I'm glad that I wrote something. Now, I'm gonna go listen to the song again biggrin.gif


The air was warm, the sun was bright, and it seemed that everywhere Rainbow Dash looked, everypony was having a good day. No fillies in wells, no approaching deadlines to make her friends go insane with worry. Just a nice, relaxed Ponyville sort of day.


Dash herself was feeling great. A nap over Sweet Apple Acres took up most of the morning, and the early afternoon had been her usual combination of weather patrol duties and stunt practice. Right now, the cyan pegasus was going through the easier ones- cloud spinning, some loops, a few dives. Stuff she could do in her sleep!


It was after a steep dive- not steep enough to produce a rainboom, Dash was still experimenting with exactly what it took to make one- that she remembered that she actually had plans today. Dash flawlessly pulled out of the dive, racing over the treetops and making her way to Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie Pie had volunteered to keep an eye on the Cutie Mark Crusaders (Rarity was off in Canterlot for the day, and Applejack was still trying to calm down the cows after an impromptu instance of 'Cutie Mark Crusaders Cowhearders), and she'd volunteered to help out a bit.


Giving a passing glance at the clock tower, Dash was surprised to see that she would actually be early! A piece of her wanted to wait and spend the extra time practicing, but... no! She'd made a promise, and it wasn't like anything bad would happen if she was early.



Just before she ran face-first into one of the upper windows, Rainbow Dash shifted her wings, instead coming to a graceful stop on the ground.


"Heh. That's how you do it," she said to herself, holding her head high and proudly trotting into the sweet shop. "Pinkie? Hey, Pinkie! You around?" she called. The shop was deserted, not surprising, considering Pinkie had been able to close it down for the babysitting today. But Dash couldn't help but feel a bit... creeped out. Sugarcube Corner was always lively, with at least a few ponies hanging around having a bite to eat. Or at least, Pinkie Pie was present. Now, it was just her. Alone. It was worse than when Pinkie had that after-birthday party, and you are NOT going back there, she thought to herself.


Rainbow Dash was so absorbed in her thoughts that she nearly screamed when she heard a faint voice from upstairs. Instead, the pegasus jumped, just barely keeping herself from diving under a table. Nerves tense, Dash stood still as the voice picked up again. There was some other sort of sound, but she couldn't make out just what it was. Taking a deep breath and keeping her knees from shaking, Rainbow slowly crept up the stairs, following the sounds until she stood in front of a door that could only lead to Pinkie Pie's room.


Frowning, Dash pressed her ear to the door, her expression turning from one of confusion to one of shock as she listened, and then into horror when the improperly shut door gave way, causing the pegasus to land face-first in the room.


"Wha- Rainbow Dash!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, leaping into the air and rushing to her friend's side. "Ohmygosh I'm so sorry I didn't hear the bell and I never expected you to be so early otherwise I wouldn't have - how long were you waiting, it wasn't too long was it?" the pink pony said, helping Dash to her hooves.


"It's fine! I just came in, I'm sorry for coming up here," Rainbow said, holding up a hoof to stop Pinkie Pie's frantic apologies. "But I heard... something," she finished, glancing away.


Pinkie Pie brightened, and she bounced around the room with a wide grin on her face. "Oh, that was just me!" she said.


"I gathered," Dash replied, giving Pinkie a confused look.


"I was singing," Pinkie Pie continued, coming to rest by a strange... box-looking device, something Dash could easily see belonging to Twilight.


"Singing what?"


"A new song," Pinkie said, looking at Dash. "A smiling song!" she added upon seeing Rainbow Dash's unimpressed look. "You know, for anyone who's really sad and just needs a smile."


"Oh," Rainbow said. That was it? "Well, that's nice. I can't think of anypony who's really need it though, just about everyone's always happy!" she said with a laugh.


"Here, yeah! I mean, what's there not to smile about? Even when we're kinda scared or there's some big meanie griffin around, we've all got each other to cheer us up. But sometimes we even have bad days," Pinkie Pie said with a shrug. "But it's not even really for us. Or anyone in Ponyville," she continued, cutting Dash off just before she could speak.


"It's like... well, like how you felt during the Mare Do Well thing. Or when I thought none of you wanted to come to my parties, or even back on the farm! Like..."


"... everything's just... bad?" Dash offered, unable to voice things any better. Pinkie Pie nodded.


"Some people feel like that all the time," Pinkie said. "Or something really, really bad happens and they need a friend. But they don't have many. Or any. Can you imagine that, having no friends?"


Dash gave an involuntary shudder. She could well imagine, and she knew Pinkie Pie could too. Before Summer Flight Camp and meeting Fluttershy, Dash had been... well, pretty lonely. And growing up on a rock farm sounded worse.


"So! I'm making this so they know there's somepony out there who cares. And who really, really wants them to smile!" Pinkie Pie finished, grinning brightly. She shooed Gummy off the box-like contraption and patted it. "And with this thing, I'll be able to share it with EVERYONE!"


"Ah... huh. Alright then," Dash said, returning Pinkie's smile. "That's really nice of you," she finally said, even though she really didn't understand most of what Pinkie Pie was saying. Everypony in Equestria had a friend, or even if they somehow didn't, somepony who cared. But this was Pinkie Pie. Dash just shook her head and turned to leave the room, watching as Pinkie fiddled with the box-thing.


"Anyway, I'll be outside when you're ready to set up for the Crusaders," she said. Pinkie Pie nodded, though she didn't even look at Dash. She was waiting for the confirmation that her message had gotten through to a composer far, far away. Like Dash, she knew that everypony in all of Equestria had somepony, and would always smile again.


But not everyone on Earth had someone. And a lot of people stopped smiling forever. She might not be able to help everyone, but she'd do her best to try, or she wasn't Pinkie Pie.

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user posted image


Black Marrow origins (Also posted in the Dragon Origins thread).



Mind linking me to that thread? I'd love to see the other ideas.


Your a wonderful writer, by the way.

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