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Everything posted by Reignhart

  1. Just curious Dusky_Flareon, why did you write about her family and their powers? Do you plan on introducing any of them at some point? Edit: Nevermind, I just saw the part where you mentioned that. It would be helpful if you explained how the expunge power works; how she "lifts the curse" so to speak. And while most DC rules apply, I should mention that the RP was created long before Valkemare lore was put in place so there's only one moon instead of two.
  2. Gunzou, see my other post. And adding to what Skwerl said, you keep saying they're "Gemini" twins which I don't get. Unless of course, you just mean that they were both born sometime between late May and late June. I'll post tomorrow to get things moving again, but I'm not doing anything with Artemis just yet. Much better. However, I don't understand how her power could be of any use. What does she gain from being in someone's dream? I'd imagine she wouldn't want to do that at all if she could potentially die from it. Plus, the part where you say she can physically enter dreams doesn't really make sense. Like, she just poofs from reality and into someone's head? I think Eternal would have a better chance of being approved if her power was changed slightly. Like maybe she can be in other dragons dreams while she's asleep and can interact with them, but she doesn't actually go anywhere. What do you think LLD?
  3. I'd rather not post in the RP until we've got this magical stone thing figured out. @Captain_Gunzou I also agree with Skwerl. The whole story feels overly complicated. If you must get glowing rubies involved then it would be a lot less confusing for everyone if it was just hereditary magic from his mother that can make stones light up. No stones that can predict anyone's future. Are you ok with this? (And yes, please consider using a spell checker.) @Dusky_Flareon I'll critique your character soon, but by just glancing at it I can see there are quite a few spelling errors which make it difficult for me to understand what you're saying.
  4. ((Questions should go in the OoC thread.))
  5. I was just about to mention this. If rubies glow around anyone related to Liger's mother, BUT it also means that something bad will happen to them in the future or they will have to "kill someone they love" like Gunzou mentioned before then basically that means everyone related to Liger's mother is doomed somehow... Then why did it come as a surprise to Liger's mother when her ruby glowed while in the presence of Liger's egg? Also, I am fine with Liger having siblings from different parents, but it sounds like their being given special characteristics that don't fit their breed without explanation. @Captain_Gunzou Like Narvix mentioned, it sounds to us like you're just throwing stuff in with no real connection. I think this idea needs to be thought out more before it's posted, otherwise, you're about to enter Mary-sue territory.
  6. Oh, whoops. ^^' I thought Liger was born into a family of Royal Crimsons, but now there are plum and ivy dragons with bright colored eyes that can control nature? ... Jesus take the wheel.
  7. I thought Ranu would've heard him say "I hate squirrels." but I see what you mean. She's also right next to Artemis so I think Jacques is confused about who is where. The forms for Nevia, Raluth, and Vulkoor have finally been added to the OP and Ranu is LeBoringJacques' once again.
  8. Communicating with the dead through dreams isn't new in the RP so I'm sure that's fine. As for the others being able to see him too, I think it depends on when and where you want him to be visible. Me or LLD might ask you to write a character form if he keeps showing up. Oh I get it now. I think Ranu is too far away to hear Vulkoor. Edit: *facepalm* I just remembered she has super hearing so nvm.
  9. Crusher nudged Irah to follow him and walked to the river with Cetn, occasionally swiping at the thorned bushes that stood in their way. Mihari had done this sort of thing before, exploring and not coming back until later than what was agreed on, but this time was different. Not only was the area unfamiliar to them, but Mihari hadn't even let him know ahead of time. Heck, Mihari couldn't even fly yet and the more Crusher thought about it the more worried he became. At least Sky's disappearance was justified even if Crusher felt miffed about it. Glancing back, he saw that Irah was still looking depressed about the whole thing. It was going to be a while before she got over it. "Chin up, Irah. I'm sure Sky misses you just as much and probably hasn't even gone very far," he said, trying to solicit some hope in his daughter. Irah didn't say anything and instead chose to stare at the ground for most of the walk. She knew Sky wasn't coming back this time and was beginning to think that she wasn't a good enough friend if he still decided to leave the clan after all these years. As they neared the river, Irah heard something splashing loudly in the water. She assumed that it was a bear or other big animal that was fishing.
  10. There were two characters before who had a unique telepathic link and the reason behind it was that they were siblings. I'm usually not a fan of that sort of thing, but I went along with it since it had an explanation, even if it was kind of a stretch, and there were rules about when and where it could be used. Given that Liger and Ranu have no history besides being friends and combined with their existing powers like Skwerl mentioned, I just don't see it working here. Feel free to challenge me though if you think I've missed something. I'm too flippin' tired right now to post much else, but I already know what I'll write tomorrow. My apologies to Narvix and SaphireKat if I'm keeping you waiting. Is it just me or does this sound contradicting? I don't know how Liger can feel warmer than normal if he's cold.
  11. ((Yeah that's fine SaphireKat. I'll be adding Crusher and Irah's part soon.)) Artemis had been pondering what medicines she could make for Liger when Ranu got her attention. Seeing that Ranu was now lying on Liger, Artemis was worried that she might get sick as well or make Liger too hot, although she was pleased to hear that Ranu had strung together her first sentence. "I know Ranu, but I think you should stay away from Liger for now. Just until I'm sure that he isn't contagious," she advised, promptly picking up Ranu and placing her further away from Liger. "Why don't you go see what Quinn is up to?" Quinn was sitting a short distance away, eyeing Ranu suspiciously. After seeing what Ranu had done with Liger, Quinn didn't want anything to do with her either.
  12. Artemis stepped away from where Liger was aiming and was puzzled as to why what was coming out of him was so hot, burning the grass by her feet. "Well, your kind are fire-breathers so that might explain it," Artemis said calmly and gently pressed the comfrey leaves to keep them in place. It must not have hurt that bad if Liger was able to sleep, but he was now shivering and his head felt really warm. She thought that Liger might be developing a fever, but she didn't have much experience in treating fire-breathers, especially one as young as him. Ranu thought that maybe Liger was shaking because he was cold so she edged closer and pressed herself against him in an attempt to keep him warm. Crusher didn't know what else to say to console Irah so he sat down and put a comforting wing over her while Cetn went scouting. When Cetn returned and told him about the fish in the 'trickler' it was easy to assume that he was referring to the river. "Excellent. The three of us can help ourselves then. Sky has left of his own accord so we only need to search for Mihari." But what about Artemis? He looked to his left and saw that she was looking after Liger who'd hurt himself. "Artemis, have you seen Mihari?" he called over. Artemis glanced up and replied, "No, I've been busy watching these three." Crusher mumbled something incoherent as he stood up. He then said "Let's get going." firmly to Cetn, "And we'll bring back some fish for the others."
  13. Phew, good thing you caught it so early. I've been RPing Ranu while you were away so you can have her back whenever you're ready.
  14. The scale isn't actually "reacting" to anything. It naturally glows due to its magical properties and it isn't very bright either.
  15. Ok Narvix, you're... :3 They're on their way to the eastern desert, but right now they're in the forest near a river. I'm confused. You want Liger to find a boulder that contains ruby and have it react to him... and then lightning comes out of it?
  16. ((I'm not sure what else to add here. Hopefully it doesn't throw you off.)) "Hm....maybe. Those two tend to come and go without saying a word... and they seem to keep forgetting that it worries me sick." Crusher grumbled, keeping an eye out in case they popped out of the bushes at any moment. Unbeknownst to Crusher, Irah was now beside him and she tapped his leg to get his attention. He looked down to see her avoiding eye-contact with a look of anguish on her face. "Sky decided to leave last night..." she mumbled and raised a wing to wipe a tear from her eye. Hearing this, an unhappy growl arose from Crusher. He had an idea of what Sky's reason was for leaving, but he couldn't help but feel mad at him for having the audacity to leave his daughter, the one who did so much for him and didn't expect anything in return. "I tried to help him, I really did, but I guess it wasn't enough." Crusher said and sighed in disappointment. "But who knows? Maybe he'll change his mind and come looking for us." ~~~ Artemis glanced over at Ranu and said "Next time, make sure there aren't any sharp rocks nearby." before she noticed that Liger was regaining consciousness. "You feeling okay, Liger?" she asked him gently.
  17. I'm feeling a little stuck right now so it'll probably take me another day or 2 to write something. Ah, ok. One last question... You mention that Raluth is slightly larger than the average Colossus, but he's also a newborn and I assume that Colossus dragons are already really big judging by DC's description. So is his size closer to average hatchling size (which I'd imagine is about as big as a large dog) or is he absolutely huge for a newborn?
  18. One last thing: Writing in yellow is usually frowned upon since it's so difficult to read, so you might want to choose another color for Liger's dad in the future.
  19. I don't see anything wrong with your forms right off the bat, but I'm curious about Raluth's invisibility. Does he become invisible by blending into the environment like a chameleon or is it more like being a ghost where anything can pass through him? I don't see how it's unacceptable aside from a few minor typos, but I can give a few tips on how to improve it somewhat. I assume because you wrote about his mother's stone that it's foreshadowing something that will happen to Liger, so maybe you could go into more detail about it. For example, you could describe what it looks like and how his parents know of its power. Have they seen similar stones only glow around dragons that have killed their brethren? Or can they only guess what it means? Edit: I just remembered that Liger was in his egg so he probably doesn't know what it looks like, but he could've noticed something nearby was glowing. Another idea I had is that each time Liger dreams he remembers something else about what happened. That way you don't have to type up the whole story in one post and you have days at a time to think up other important details you might want to include.
  20. Mihari was the one that wanted to bring the ice mana whereas Irah just hid the scale.
  21. Looks like Evesthery can't be bothered to read the rules and I'm tired of reminding people to post in this thread first. So I think I'm just going to not say anything to her, it isn't worth my time. @Captain_Gunzou The glow came from a jewel that Irah found and hid in Crusher's satchel and I already planned the story behind it with the other players. (It's actually a scale from an Avatar of Change.) It was before you joined so I guess I should've told you about it, but I didn't think you'd make up a whole story about what it was when I vaguely mentioned it. So, I'd appreciate if you didn't change the story since the "stone" is supposed to be an important tool in the group's search for help against their rival. In the future, it would be extremely helpful if you let us know about your ideas first so that you don't unknowingly try to change the lore that's already been put in place. Sorry 'bout that. @SaphireKat Looks good to me.
  22. Crusher knew enough about Bleeding Moon dragons to know that the red spots on their back reacted to the sun, but Cetn appeared to be a unique case. "Hm, I see. Well, I'm sure Artemis could prepare some medicine for that if you asked her. She knows quite a bit about using herbs and whatnot." he commented. "Oh right, breakfast... I almost forgot." They should definitely eat something before heading for the desert, not doing so could be dangerous. He looked around to see if anyone else would be interested in hunting with him and realised that something, or rather, someone was missing... Two hatchlings were missing! "Have you seen Sky or Mihari anywhere?" he asked Cetn. He must've not been fully awake before to have not noticed they were gone and felt unnerved by the fact that he hadn't double checked earlier. ~~~ Ranu laughed when Liger jumped into the air and she didn't let go as the two of them rolled through the grass. Liger was then able to throw her off and she quickly stood back up, ready to go again, but Liger wasn't getting up for some reason. She ran to Liger's side and nudged him with her foot, but there was no response so she sat down and looked over at Artemis with worry in her eyes. Artemis sighed and sprung into action, quickly trotting over to examine Liger's head. Liger had hurt his jaw less than a day ago and now this? Some hatchlings seemed to have a talent for hurting themselves, but thankfully Artemis came prepared with some herbs she found at Shatterpoint. "He took quite a tumble, but I'm sure he'll be fine." she assured Ranu before she swiftly went over to where Crusher's satchel sat under the tree. She lifted the satchel with her left claw and rummaged through it with her right. Artemis thought she caught a glimpse of something glowing at the bottom, but she dismissed it thinking it was probably coming from Mihari's mana shards. Soon she pulled out some comfrey leaves and crushed them together before trotting back to Liger and lightly pressing them to the welt. Ranu lay down and didn't know what to do other than watch Artemis do her work.
  23. Ranu did a complete circle around Liger, looking closely at how clean he was now. His scales sure looked a lot better, but he didn't sound very happy. And like Irah, his eyes said that something bad had happened. Ranu then thought that maybe she could make him feel better the only way she knew how. She crouched down then pounced onto him, hoping that playing rough would cheer him up.
  24. ((Crusher actually doesn't use telepathy very often, but he's a chatty fellow. Quinn is the only one who uses it almost all the time.)) Irah was still lying with her wings over her head when Cetn bumped into her. "It's fine..." she mumbled and stood up, brushing off pieces of grass that stuck to her midsection. Artemis was barely awake and hadn't noticed that Liger was gone for a short time. "Good morning...!" she yawned and immediately began preening her scales, preparing herself for the day ahead. Quinn sat behind Artemis to shield herself from the bright rays that shone through the trees, watching Liger with disdain. She didn't exactly know why she disliked him, something about him just didn't sit well with her. Maybe it was his strange eyes or the fact that he seemed to have little control over his fire-breath. Whatever it was, she wanted to keep her distance from him until she knew that he wasn't going to be annoying or cause trouble. Crusher got up and walked out from under the tree to stretch his wings. He glanced in Cetn's direction and noticed that his scales appeared discolored. "Is there something wrong with your scales? he asked. "You look like you might be allergic to something."
  25. Wait so Cetn has orange scales? Or is that just what happens when he's in the sun for too long?